Starlight I : Sheratan's Call
by Shadowhawke
Summary: A Curse and the meddling Powers change the course of Season 4 and beyond. Book One of the Starlight Chronicles. Eventual Spuffy! Please Review! COMPLETE!
1. Default Chapter

**Starlight I : Sheratan's Call**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters except for Mia, Bryan, Daniel, and Cassandra. Joss Whedon owns all of the others.**

**Rating: PG 13. I promise. At least I'm not planning anything above it. There might be some harsh language, a bit of violence, and a few 'references', but nothing above kissing is going to be described without warning.**

**A/N: Hi, guys! I'm new here, and I'm not really sure about writing fanfic, so I'd be really happy if you read my work and reviewed it. I just want to get better, and make sure the time you waste reading my work is worth it. : ). Erm… I know there's something else I have to do. Ah yes. Please tell me if I missed something I had to do. Thanks! Okay, now, onto the story. I hope you enjoy.**

**Edit: I've had a complaint about my formatting. From now on, anything that is not part of the actual story shall be in bold… disclaimers, Author's Notes, etc. Thank you.**

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**Chapter 1: The Curse**

"Oh, bloody hell!"

With the epithet still rebounding around on the walls of his crypt, Spike cradled his bleeding hand, and cursed. It wasn't long, however, before he licked his fingers, sucking at the sweet liquid that dribbled from his knuckles. He laughed bitterly. Stale crypt wall dust flavour. On the house. Or on the crypt. Or both.

God, he was confused.

He started pacing again. He knew that he'd been babbling. But he couldn't help it. He felt another crazy urge to smash his fist into the wall.

He shouldn't be feeling guilty. Bloody hell! Feeling guilty was for poofters. And a specific grand-daddy poof. 'Sides, you couldn't feel guilty without a soul kicking around, right?

Spike stopped, abruptly. That was a good point. Why was he feeling guilty without a shred of anything resembling a soul knocking about in him? Was he feeling guilty at all? If he wasn't feeling guilty… what was that… stupid… thing that was bothering him right now?

No. He wasn't feeling guilty. Just… uncomfortable, that's all. Just a strange nagging feeling that maybe he ishould/i be worried about working with Adam. Maybe he ishould/i be worried about the extreme probability of Adam not holding out his end of the bargain. And a strange nagging feeling that maybe…

Spike let out another crazed laugh. "And what'd Dru think of me?" he muttered. "Feelin' uncomfortable about doing the whole double-cross thing on the Slayer? She'd dance for bloody joy about it."

And that only brought an uncomfortable image of Dru, dancing in Brazil. The last thing he'd seen before he'd left. Only it wasn't with him, like it'd almost always been. With that stupid Fungus Demon git…

And that was when Spike gave up, and collapsed onto the dilapidated armchair he'd taken from the tip, and got drunk.

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Buffy was fuming.

Not fuming in an I'm-just-irritated-and-will-get-over-this-soon way, she was fuming in a bad way.

Fuming in a Buffy get-out-of-my-way-or-I'll-annihilate-you way.

The search for Riley had turned out futile, and had earned her a nice gash on her forehead and Forrest's death. She couldn't help feeling guilty about him, even though she had warned him repeatedly not to follow her. Now, she was extremely angry. Mostly at herself, but also at her friends for deserting her. She didn't understand how they could all turn on her like that. It had been so quick… and she had never seen such resentment in their eyes. The anger combined with the guilt to pave the way for an all-out Buffy fury, and that was what she was trying to work out.

So now, the Slayer was storming in the direction of the graveyard, about to unleash all hell on whatever crossed her. Not that she didn't normally, but the dangerous, almost demonic glint in her eye actually scared away a group of fledglings who had been planning to ambush her. A newly risen vampire, however, didn't get the chance. Normally, she just staked them as soon as she had the chance. But tonight the poor fledgling withstood ten minutes of her fury as she unleashed her pent up anger, every last bit of it, onto his broken body. To alleviate her somewhat guilt, it also happened to be a maths teacher who'd used to have a grudge against her.

Satisfied, Buffy continued, stalking westward. As she paused for a moment, one the group of aforementioned fledglings who hadn't run away foolishly decided to jump her. Three others, following their hive mentality, followed. Buffy almost grinned.

"Just what I needed…" she announced as the three circled her. One lunged, and she sent a flying kick in her direction, their two bodies soaring through the air as the fledgling crashed onto the grass, Buffy landing nimbly beside her. As the two other vampires rushed her, she took them both down with a roundhouse kick, and then flipped gracefully, taking the first fledgling down. When all three had turned to dust, she beamed, the final tension seeping away from her. "A little workout," she completed her sentence. Satisfied that no-one else was around as she scanned the cemetery, she walked home, preparing for a long shower that would help complete her unwinding. Unbeknownst to her, the graveyard was not as empty as she'd thought it was. Two sets of eyes watched her as she went, unblinking.

"Wow."

"She is angry," the other of them noted. "A petty, useless, human emotion. But it is interesting. I want to know more about this anger and the Slayer. I want to know what caused it."

"Well, it makes sense, doesn't it? After what he told us."

"It makes sense, yes. But the Slayer does not make sense. That is what intrigues me."

"What do you mean?"

"She is… different. Complex. More complex than I'd originally thought."

"What do you mean?" he repeated. "She's simple. She fights us, she kills us, and then, eventually, one of us gets smart enough and powerful enough to kill her. Then the next Slayer comes along."

"No. I've been reading about the Slayer line. This one is different from the others. Unique."

He thought of snorting in derision, but remembered the power of the being that stood next to him. Instead, he resolved to break it to him gently.

"All Slayers are the same, boss. They really are. This one will get killed off soon, just like the rest of them. The only reason she's lasted so long is that she's strong."

"No," he said stubbornly. "This one is special. But she is also weak. The anger she is displaying now is testimony to that fact."

He sighed, shrugged, and gave up. "Have it your way, boss."

It wasn't an evil leer that crossed his face, nor the typical trademark sneer that the evil guys in all the movies seemed to possess. Instead, he simply smiled.

"Oh, I intend to."

The two walked back casually towards the caves that led to the Initiative deep below the earth. As they negotiated their way through the labyrinth, the vampiric sidekick looked at him strangely.

"By the way, boss, what did you mean by 'I intend to?'"

"Trust me," Adam said simply, as he walked through the complex.

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"You did know that that 'eye of newt and tail of rat' thing isn't true, right?"

"What in God's name are you talking about?" Bryan asked, annoyed.

"You know," Mia waved her hands about vaguely. "That's what they sing about, right? The witches?"

Her boyfriend looked at her blankly, and she sighed and gave up. "You know, when they used to curse people? Like, all those stories? They used to say stuff about the ingredients being newt eyes and rat tails and stuff like that."

"And this has to do with this, how?" Bryan asked exasperatedly, gesturing at the small triangle they'd drawn in pig blood, with a candle at each of the three respective corners and a bowl of unidentified simmering objects in its middle. On either side of the bowl, two photos lay, a boy and a girl softly smiling out from them.

"Well, we're cursing them, right? And we didn't use newt eyes and rat tails, so it mustn't be true."

"Fine, whatever," Bryan rolled his eyes. "Let's just get this little thing over and done with. If Mom found out…"

"Oh please," Mia pouted. "I thought you'd cleared things up with your Mom ages ago."

"I thought I did too, but I had like, one candle in my room the other day, and she just went all spazzo on me."

"Aww… poor little bad boy Bryan," Mia smirked. "Not so big and bad as he puts out, huh?"

Immediately, with an almost feral growl in his eyes, Bryan was up. Moving almost inhumanly quickly, he slammed her against the wall of the basement, and then moved his hands so that they rested on the wall on either side of her head, trapping her.

"You will never talk about that incident again," Bryan snarled, his voice low and menacing. "Do you hear me?"

Mia, however, was not put off. She'd been in situations like this before. Heck, this was why Bryan Cornwall, of all people, was her boyfriend. Her big, tall, handsome, strong, bad-ass boyfriend that everyone disapproved of.

"Depends," she shrugged whimsically. "I could tell them about your fight." She traced a finger lightly over a large bruise that decorated his jawbone. "How manly you are… and could be."

As the two became more and more entwined with each other, none of them noticed the flame of the three candles flare to the ceiling, somehow leaving it unsinged. As unexperienced as they were, and as caught up in the moment as they were, neither Mia nor Bryan smelt the scent of a curse gone hideously wrong.

The two photographs slowly burned.

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**(Okay, I'm sorry for it being short and disjointed. I'm going to sound desperate, but that's because I am. Please review! Thanks. : ) )**


	2. Ouch

**Chapter 2: Ouch**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters except for Mia, Bryan, Daniel, and Cassandra. Joss Whedon owns all of the others.**

**Rating: PG 13. I promise. At least I'm not planning anything above it. There might be some harsh language, a bit of violence, and a few 'references', but nothing above kissing is going to be described without warning.**

**A/N (Please tell me if I missed something I had to do. Thanks! Okay, now, onto the story. I hope you enjoy. I'm sorry about there not being much Buffy universe in this section. Afterwards, I promise… heaps…: ) )**

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-Before the Curse-

Cassandra hummed quietly as she fingered her pen, smoothing the sheet of paper down as it attempted to answer the light breeze that swept her porch. She heard banging noises floating from over the wooden fence and sighed, trying to keep her mind focused. Unfortunately, unwanted images drifted up and she sighed again, frustrated. The pen dropped from her hand. There was no point in writing now. The only thing she could write when she knew that Mia and Bryan were at it again was insults, and that generally didn't go down too well. Besides, it was a waste of paper.

"Hey. What's got you all frustrated?"

Startled, Cassandra shot upwards, crashing into a hanging pot-plant that promptly fell of its hook and spilt its contents over her head. She tripped over the edge of the porch and landed sprawling on the lawn, covered in dirt. Immediately, her face went flame red, contrasting heavily with her black hair as she heard a low chuckle. Someone sought her hand, and she was pulled upright.

"Well, the next time I disturb you in one of your reveries, I'll make sure to call an ambulance first."

"Daniel," Cassandra didn't dare look at him in mortification. "I'm sorry…"

"To have made a scene," he finished, grinning at her. "Hey, don't stress. Now get inside, and have a shower."

"Okay," she smiled slightly. "But I have to get this cleaned up first." She gestured at the mess she'd accidentally made.

"But I have to get this cleaned up first," mimicked another voice from over the fence.

Their heads snapped up, and Daniel scowled at the couple lounging on the wood, tangled up in each other's arms, but thankfully, presentably dressed. "Get lost, Mia."

"Are you telling my girlfriend to get lost?" Bryan asked menacingly,

"Since when did you lose your hearing, doofus? Yes, I am telling your girlfriend to get lost."

Before Bryan could say something macho, Mia finally decided to comment on Cassandra's appearance. "Been rolling around in the dirt more than usual, have you Cassandra? Of course, considering most of your relatives live in it, hardly surprising."

Even Bryan froze as the words came out of Mia's mouth, and Mia herself was a little shocked. But the look on Cassandra's face was devastating.

Finally, the silence was snapped. Carrying herself with an air of quiet dignity that none but Daniel had ever seen before, Cassandra turned around and faced them fully.

"Mia, that was beneath you," she stated icily. With that, Cassandra belatedly walked into the house to take Daniel's previous advice.

The three stood outside for awhile, in stunned silence. Eventually, Bryan broke it.

"Aren't you going to even go after your girlfriend you idiot?"

"She's not my girlfriend," Daniel glared daggers at him. "Now, really, Mia. Get lost."

He turned and stalked into the house after his best friend, and left Mia and Bryan hanging on the fence, now both looking and feeling ever-so-slightly foolish. They eventually looked at each other in the semi-darkness that now enveloped them, imagining the painful scene that must be unfolding inside.

"Ouch."

Despite their predictions, Daniel was merely sitting on the floor as Cassandra, still dirt-covered, quickly seized her forgotten pen and paper and started feverishly writing. He flipped on the T.V casually like he had so many times before, knowing she just had to get whatever she had out of her.

The words poured out of her, and she couldn't stop them. She didn't want to stop them as they ran their course from her mind and soul along her arms to finally end at her fingertips, moving the pen back and forth as the poetry boiled out of her.

"_Throughout the mist that Darkness shares with Light, the Shadows fall,_

_Their child in all ways but one, who answers both their calls,_

_Caught between their warring worlds, with Life and Death's embrace, _

_Seeking praise on both their terms to only fall from grace…"_

Her pen stopped moving. "Damn."

"What is it?" Daniel leaned over and read her work.

"I… just stopped. It's like I can't write anymore."

He surveyed it, silently. "It's good."

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"You know, it's so fun having Mia as my neighbour, d'you know that?"

"Well how do you think I feel about having Bryan as my neighbour?" Daniel laughed. "It's definitely not all fluffy clouds and rainbows."

"True. I still can't believe the four of us used to be best friends."

Cassandra was a comfortable half-meter away from Daniel as they walked to the disco/nightclub that they liked to call the Bronze underneath the silent moon, but she physically felt him freeze. He didn't stop moving, but something within him got even colder than it had. A small ball of ice that lay buried in his chest that had just become a couple of degrees lower. She stopped, concerned, but he just laughed. It lacked the carefree ring of his earlier one.

"Neither can I."

They continued, less talkative than before. As they walked into the Bronze, they heard two successive snickers, and Daniel rolled his eyes. Cassandra almost smiled. That one familiar gesture seemed to be all that was needed to make her lips quirk.

"D'you want a drink?" Daniel asked as they moved away from where Mia and Bryan were displaying their affection to the world.

"Wouldn't mind one," Cassandra admitted, already feeling the musical vibrations in the air pounding its way through her body. "But… uh…"

"You'd rather dance first, right?" Daniel finished the sentence for her, amused.

She laughed, suddenly, and it lit up her face. "You know me too well. Dance with me?"

"Of course."

As a softer, less pounding song went on, the two spun around in circles, laughing as they danced. But halfway through the song, they heard a sudden commotion near the door, and the band went silent. It was an entire minute before they picked up the music again, but by then Cassandra and Daniel were already on their way to the disturbance. Unsurprisingly, it was their dear old 'friends' being accosted by someone who looked the mirror image of Bryan, only bigger, badder, and blacker.

"So, kid, are you ever going to pay me back?"

Daniel was surprised to see real fear in Bryan's eyes. "Yes. Of course! I will. Just give me more time!"

The man let out an expansive sigh. "You see, kid, time ticks by… it's been four weeks."

"I will. I'll pay. Please. Another week."

The man looked thoughtfully at the boy whose neck he was still slowly squeezing. An idea lit his eyes, then, thoughtfully.

"Actually, maybe I'll cancel your debt."

He laughed at the look of hope in the boy's eyes, and then squeezed harder. Bryan choked as his feet dangled a couple of inches from the floor.

"My boys haven't been in a good fight for a long time," he explained almost casually. "I figure the hospital bill will be about what you owe me, anyway."

Just as he and his three burly friends were about to make good their threat, Cassandra stopped them. She didn't know why, and she didn't know how. Unconsciously, she stepped forwards.

"Let. Him. Go."

The man raised an eyebrow. "Now who's this, Bryan?" he mocked, even though he was a little surprised that anyone had stood up to him. "I thought your girlfriend was that little heap over there."

Cassandra ignored the joke, but now she was feeling a little less certain of herself. "Let him go. iPlease/i."

"Please?" he sneered. "Oh, that's pretty. Maybe I will, then," he dropped Bryan, who lay wheezing on the floor. "But what makes you think I still won't take his debt out of his body, girlie?"

Daniel knew his friend too well. Saw the small waver before she replied, but then he was there.

"Because Bryan, Mia, Cassandra and I are going to walk out of that door," he inclined his head towards the exit. "And you will not follow us. Bryan will pay you back, and no-one will have to go to hospital. Now, we're going."

With everyone still in shock, Daniel sighed, smiled his trademark smile, and grabbed Cassandra's hand and Mia's. Mia instantly pulled Bryan up, and they all filed out of the door.

But it wasn't over yet. As they walked through the alleyway, Bryan recovered from his shock and yanked Mia's hand from Daniel's.

"What were you doing?" he hissed. "I had it perfectly under control, you wanker."

"I'm not going to waste time arguing with you, Bryan," Daniel shrugged instead. "But just feel grateful that Cassandra stopped big guy back there from kicking your ass."

At the murderous look in Bryan's eyes, Cassandra understandably became very scared. "Daniel, please. Let's go."

"You certainly do say 'please' a lot, don't you? Polite little girl. Not going to stop us, though."

All four of them spun around.

After the bashing in the quiet alley, away from the eyes of others, the four men seemed satisfied, and left. Not that they left without their own injuries, but four experienced fighters against four inexperienced kids hardly constituted as a fair battle. The ambulance had been called by a couple who had snuck into the alley for some sweet nothings and more physically related action. They'd all been taken to the hospital, where broken bones were set and large cuts were stitched. Bryan and Mia, who'd been at the back, hadn't copped it as bad as Cassandra and Daniel. They were due to be discharged tomorrow. Cassandra and Daniel, however, would be staying for another week after complications due to slivered bones.

In the hospital bed, nursing his split lip, bloodied nose, and black eye, Bryan pondered a sweet and agonizingly painful revenge upon both Daniel and Cassandra for his humiliation, never stopping to remember how they'd stayed. And fought.

And that was when the idea of the curse came upon him.

And when he told Mia, her only word was an expected one.

"Ouch."

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"Ouch."

Adam raised his demon eyebrow, a habit he'd almost unconsciously copied from the bleached blond. "I take it that you approve."

"Approve?" Spike snorted. "It's…" he quickly revised his answer. "It… could be improved."

"Really?" Adam asked mildly. "And how might that be?"

"The Slayer is going to know about this. And she's going to do something about it."

"Yes, I'm aware of that. In fact, I count on it. The disks that you procured for her will decrypt in exactly seventy-two hours and give her the information."

"You mean you're actually going to let her know you're plan? Doesn't that, like, make it easier for her to stop it?"

"She has no choice in the matter. But when the time comes, she will be where I want her to be."

Riley felt the urge to clench his fists, but nothing seemed to be under his control. For the moment, however, he knew that he could speak.

"You don't know Buffy. Neither of you do," he snarled. "She'll see through your stupid plan and then…"

"Quiet," Adam raised a hand. Spike watched in amazement as Riley, with a vein in his temple still throbbing, fell silent. The vampire could almost see the muscles in his hands attempting to work.

"Well, well, well," he breathed, eying Riley. "What mojo did you work on him?"

"I did not 'work' anything on him, as you put it," Adam snorted derisively. "I merely activated his chip."

"His chip?" Spike's eyebrow shot up, accentuating the slivered scar across it. "Well then. Chips all around, is it?"

Adam ignored him. "Go now. You have a job to do."

"And when I've finished it, I will get the chip removed, won't I?" Spike pressed.

Adam's eyes gleamed faintly with what Spike warily decided to take as amusement. "Scout's honour."

As Spike left, however, he heard voices echoing along the passages, and quickly jumped into the protection of the nearest shadows that were available. Laughter ricocheted off the walls as two vampires passed him, oblivious of his presence. As he listened to them discussing the hybrid demon/man/machine's plans, a sudden realization came over him. With one quick glance backwards at the cave that contained Adam, who was now completely unaware of his presence and bent over his computers, the vampire's eyes narrowed.

_Oh yes,_ he thought. _I believe I do have a job to do_.

When he thought of what it would entail, he winced.

"Ouch."

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**(Okay, I'm sorry if it's not good enough. I'm going to sound desperate, but that's because I am. Please review! Tell me how to make it better. Thanks. : ) )**


	3. Reunion

**Chapter 3: Reunion**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters except for Mia, Bryan, Daniel, and Cassandra. Joss Whedon owns all of the others.**

**Rating: PG 13. I promise. At least I'm not planning anything above it. There might be some harsh language, a bit of violence, and a few 'references', but nothing above kissing is going to be described without warning.**

**A/N (Please tell me if I missed something I had to do. Thanks! Okay, now, onto the story. I hope you enjoy. As promised, all of this is set in the Buffy universe in this section. : ) Heh, I've also included some of the original script for Primeval for diehard Buffy fans. : ) )**

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Right now, Buffy hated mornings. It wasn't bad enough that she'd woken up with what threatened to become a migraine, she'd also misplaced her weapons bag, and being without it made her feel ever-so-slightly vulnerable. Of course, she was the Slayer, but hefting a large axe in her hand always made her feel more comfortable. Not to mention that Riley was missing. Plus, she'd torn one of her favourite shirts when she'd stumbled out of Adam's cave.

And she, Willow, Xander, and Giles still weren't talking. The last thing she needed was a blond, bleached vampire to stumble up to her doorway, smoking from the sunlight.

"What in the Hellmouth are you doing here?" she hissed.

"Let me in!" Spike tried frantically to get past her. "Hello, I'm burning up here!"

Buffy pretended to ponder it. "And I should care… why? Mortal enemies, remember?"

"I'm here to help you," the vampire exclaimed, stressing on the word 'help'. Irritated by the dagger-like glare that she was giving him and her frosty attitude, he scowled. "Got that? I'm trying to help you!"

Buffy relented, but only because she knew that they were making a scene that she wouldn't be able to explain to the neighbours. She threw him inside and then slammed the door behind her.

"As if I'd need your help," Buffy replied coldly. "As if I'd ever need the help of an evil, soulless demon."

Spike wanted to scream in frustration. A manly scream, of course. "Bloody hell, Slayer! I've helped you before, and if it hadn't been for me, you'd be dead. Now will you bloody get off your high horse and listen to me? I've got the inside scoop on Adam."

Buffy had been contemplating throwing him out into the sunlight for good until the word 'Adam' hit her. Quickly, without even thinking about it, she grabbed him by the collar and threw him into the living room, making him land neatly on the sofa, but still with his unneeded breath knocked out of him. Luckily for him, the curtains were still drawn. She stalked after the sailing vampire, glared at him, and then studied him, her arms crossed.

"Talk. Now."

Spike groaned and sat up, sure that his back would become a massive bruise later. "Easy, Slayer. I haven't eaten for three days now, you know. Had to come up with a bit of a plan before I came to you. A couple of excuses as well. For Adam."

Buffy was about to remind him that he was an evil, soulless demon, or say something about him getting food later after he spilled, when she noticed his exaggerated cadaverous appearance. His eyes were sunken in their sockets, and his highly defined, delicate cheekbones seemed to almost sag in exhaustion. Surprising herself, she nodded curtly.

"I'll get you some blood."

Without waiting for a reply, she walked out to the kitchen to heat up some blood that her mother had insisted they store since the last time Spike had come around for a visit.

Spike stared in astonishment after the Slayer as she vanished. He hadn't actually expected her to fetch him some food. All he'd wanted was some leeway before he started talking. He hadn't been lying. After overhearing his fellow brethren's conversation, he'd been shocked. Then he'd mentally berated himself. Then he'd cooped himself inside his crypt, furiously working out a plan. His first instinct, as hot-headed as he was, was simply to march to the Slayer and tell her everything. Then he remembered that there would be nothing to stop her from staking him after he admitted his allegiance with Adam unless he proved that he was serious. Thus, he used his moderate hacking skills to break into the Initiative. He wished that Red could have done it, but it would have defeated the purpose. Halfway through his research, he'd been startled by another of Adam's minions, and had to concoct some rather implausible excuses to throw the demon hybrid off his trail.

The minute he finally thought he'd covered everything, he'd raced to Number 1630 on Revello Drive under cover of his usual blanket. It had only been when Buffy had thrown him onto the couch that he realized his exhaustion.

Now, he gave into it. Slumping down and finally relaxing, his eyes closed before he knew it.

Buffy almost dropped the mug of blood when she saw him asleep on the sofa. She quickly placed it on the coffee table before she did lose her grip on it, and then turned around. She violently pushed back the urge to shake him and demand answers, surprising herself yet again. Instead she leaned back and once more studied him.

His rumpled platinum blonde hair curled slightly as he lay, curled up in a loose foetal position. The roots were starting to show, as he'd not been able to tend to them while in his planning craze. His exhausted features were now somewhat at peace as he lay there. Lying there, a trusting expression on his face, he looked like an angel.

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"Buffy?"

Buffy almost cursed as she heard her mother descending the stairs. But Joyce was down before the Slayer could do anything about the vampire on the couch.

"Buffy, what's…?" Joyce quickly stopped talking as she registered the scene before her. Surprise widened in her eyes. "Spike? Spike's back in town?" she gasped.

"Talk about it," Buffy muttered. "Being a pain in my…"

The look of surprise turned into one of injury. "But… he didn't ring me!"

"What…?"

Buffy sat down in one of the armchairs, feeling her headache throb once again as she attempted to register the myriad of new information that had assaulted her so quickly in the last ten minutes. "What? Mum… did you say…?"

Joyce coloured. "What? I am allowed to keep my own acquaintances, Buffy. He's a nice man, too."

"He's not a man, mum! He's a vampire! You know… evil bloodsucking soulless demon!"

"Now stop that," Joyce scolded her daughter, who was gesticulating wildly. "You'll wake him. Now get him his blanket, tuck him in, and then we should have a talk. In the kitchen."

Almost sullenly, Buffy picked up the discarded blanket and walked over to the couch. Joyce watched with interest as she threw it haphazardly over him. It fluttered down to cover his face and leave his still-booted feet in the air. Despite herself, Buffy relented, dragging the blanket down and tucking the edge gently under his chin.

"Good," Joyce muttered satisfactorily. "Now, we need to talk."

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Buffy looked rather ungraciously at the swirling cocoa she held in her hand. She watched her mother walk around the kitchen, smiling, half-talking to herself. "I'm glad I stocked up on the marshmallows."

"Marshmallows?" Buffy asked, confused.

"The mini-marshmallows. Spike loves them."

Buffy slammed her mug down, the remaining liquid sloshing over the rim and burning her. But she ignored it. "Okay, that does it! I want him out of my life, out of this town…"

"Buffy! Stop it! Honestly, you're acting like a child."

Joyce couldn't help laughing over the incredibly sulky look Buffy gave her. "You are, you know."

"Mum, he's an evil, soulless demon!" she repeated again.

"And he also hasn't hurt you lately, has he? Otherwise I would be hearing rants about how you were going to finally stake him."

Buffy scowled. "The only reason he hasn't is because of the chip."

She sighed as she saw the questioning look on her mother's face. Something in her wanted to keep her mother protected from all of this. But she knew now that Joyce was entitled to at least hear about her… contact. Buffy couldn't bear to think of her mother and her ex-arch-nemesis as… friends. Quickly, she outlined all that had happened. Including, grudgingly, the times when Spike had helped them. Joyce listened patiently throughout, until she finished. Just before she was about to launch into a rant about Spike, she was stopped by the look in her mother's eyes. Pity.

"So, what are you planning to do?"

"What am I planning to do? I'm planning to punch him until he wakes up, choke the information out of him, and then throw him out into the sunlight to burn."

"Buffy!" Joyce gasped shocked.

Buffy grinned. "Don't worry, Mum. I was joking."

Joyce gave her 'the look'.

"Fine," Buffy admitted. "Maybe I'm not joking. I mean, the first two are perfectly reasonable, right? And the third one's tempting…"

"Buffy, there will be no punching, choking, or throwing of guests out into the sunlight to burn in this house. Now you look tired, you should go back to sleep."

"Oh, he's a guest now? And you expect me to go back to sleep with him in the house? You've got to be kidding me! Besides, there's a lot I have to do."

"You only have afternoon classes today, though, don't you?" Joyce asked, perplexed.

"Yes, I know," Buffy sighed, frustrated. "But I have to meet up with Giles, Willow and Xander."

"Oh, very well then."

"Wait! I can't leave you alone with him!"

"Buffy, I need to go to the gallery today, anyway."

"Well I'm not leaving him in the house alone! He might trash it or something."

Joyce was going to argue, but she could see her daughter was in full stubborn-Buffy mode. Resisting the urge to roll her eyes, she instead thought of a solution. "Fine then," she sighed. "We'll compromise. Why don't you ring them and tell them to come here?"

"Okay," she decided, her eyes clouding slightly as she remembered the reason behind their meeting, and the nagging feeling she'd had that had led to her calling it.

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

There was a stony silence as the four of them surveyed each other. Buffy had closed the doors to the living-room, not wanting her friends to see the still sleeping vampire. As they stood in the dining room, discomfort hanging palpable in the air, Buffy broke the silence. She wished that someone else could have. That someone else could have just come to her and said that all was forgiven, and they could work together. But as always, it had to be her. She had to start somehow…

"Where's Anya?" the words left her mouth before she could stop them.

Xander looked at her, coldness still in his gaze. "Despite all the fun we had last night, Anya decided not to show up."

"And… and Tara didn't feel welcome."

Buffy had to stop herself from trying to flinch. It was time for her to get this over and done with. No more stalling. She addressed Willow first. It was almost automatic.

"Willow, who told you specifically that we were talking behind your back about you, Tara, and your magic?"

"Well it was horrible that you did," Willow replied angrily. "I mean, I can do what I…"

"Willow!" Buffy tried desperately. "Please! Just tell me. Who told you?"

Willow grudgingly acquiesced, her nose crinkling slightly as she tried to remember. Her eyes remained stony when she finally replied. "Well, Spike, specifically."

Buffy nodded grimly. It was just as she'd expected. Next, she turned to Xander.

"And you? Who told you that we thought you were useless and better off joining the army?"

"Well I knew you were thinking it," Xander lashed back defensively. "You were all thinking it. Stupid Xander, who doesn't go to college and can't hold a job…"

"Xander! Just tell me! Who told you?"

Xander, too, had to stop and think. "Well, those weren't exactly the words he said."

Buffy could almost feel that slight tingle in her gut when she knew she had solved something. She felt a strange trickle of pride that was ridiculously out of place.

"And you? Giles? Who told you…?"

Buffy didn't have to finish her question. Giles had caught on. "Well… I'm very stupid."

"He's been playing us," Buffy explained. "He wanted to split us up."

"So… that's where all the stuff we said last night came from, right?"

"Of course," Xander looked at them uncomfortably.

"I get it… but why?"

"You know, what I don't get is that you actually listened to him," Buffy commented, still irritated.

"Spike can be… quite convincing when he wants to be," Giles tried lamely.

Willow almost immediately switched to apologizing mode. "Oh god, I'm sorry for the stuff I said last night, Buffy. I didn't mean it, but I thought…"

"I think we all owe each other an apology," Buffy grimaced. "We all said some pretty horrible things. And, I'm sorry. I hate that things have been strained between all of us."

"It's not your fault. Spike stirred up trouble. And I shouldn't have listened to him. I mean Spike, of all people…"

"He's not a person, he's a thing," Xander looked angry. "But yeah, I'm with you, Willow. We shouldn't have believed him."

"I guess I've got my own apologies to add," Giles looked embarrassed.

Buffy shook her head. "It's not your fault."

"But he stirred up trouble so easily. It's terrible that we all turned on you just because he said a few things."

"I think that he stirred trouble up so easily because there was trouble to be stirred. We've all seemed to drift apart this year, guys. But I just want it to be like when we were in High School. You know… a tight group."

"But you know, first year in college. It's hard to keep the High School gig," Willow tried to comfort her.

"But I want us to be close again. A tight group. I miss you, Will. And you, and you. I'm been so wrapped up in my own stuff this year, I've been a bad friend."

"You're the Slayer, Buffy. Your stuff is pretty crucial," Xander laughed.

"No, I mean Riley," Buffy blushed. " And… Riley, mostly."

"Well, I've been hiding stuff as well," Willow confessed. "Keeping secrets."

"Will, that's not your fault. You were going through something huge."

"I wanted to tell you, but I was scared," Willow whispered contritely.

Buffy looked at her in horror. "Will, you can tell me anything!" she exclaimed with conviction. "I love you. You're my best friend."

"Me too, I love you too," Willow smiled, finally, and they hugged each other. Before Xander or Giles had time to react, they were all being choked as an impromptu group hug took place.

Buffy grinned, headache and previous worries forgotten. "Let's promise to never not talk again."

"I promise," they all echoed.

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

When they all broke out of their embrace rather reluctantly, Willow looked thoughtful.. "Why would Spike go to the trouble of doing that, though?"

"He's all dressed up with no one to bite," Xander reasoned. "He's got to get his yah-yahs somehow."

"No. I think… no. I know that Spike's working for Adam."

"Spike's working for Adam?" Xander exclaimed. "After all that we've done… nah. I can't even act surprised!"

"Adam?" Giles asked, startled. "What makes you think that?"

"I found him wandering around in the caves below the Initiative. He kicked up a big fuss when I told him Adam was using them. Too big a fuss. And now this. Adam must be trying to split us up. We're easier to take down that way. "

"Well, why would Spike be working for Adam?"

" 'Cause he's evil," Xander groaned. "Come on, how many times did I tell you to just stake him?"

"Xander's got a point, you know, Buffy. I know that you didn't feel the need to stake him now that he's been rendered, ah, harmless. But he's shown now that he really isn't."

"I know what you mean, Giles. I probably should have, when I got the many chances to. Hell, I wish I had. We probably wouldn't be in the trouble we are now," she said bitterly.

"But?" Giles prompted, knowing there was always a 'but'.

Buffy sighed for the umpteenth time that day. "He came to me today with some information. Important information. Made my headache worse by just being there."

"Hang on a second, he came to you! With some information? And now that we know he's working for Adam, are you telling me he's still breathing?"

Before anyone could correct him, he sighed. "Yeah, yeah, I know he doesn't have to breathe. But you know what I mean!"

"Actually, he came saying that he had the inside scoop on Adam. With his information, we might be able to form a plan to defeat whatever he's cooking up for us."

"Already done, love."

8 8 8

**(I know, I am really sounding desperate. But that's because I am. Really, really, really. Is anyone reading this? Because if they are, please review! I'll write faster, I promise! Tell me how to make it better. Thanks. : ) )**


	4. Stress

**Chapter 4: Stress**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters except for Mia, Bryan, Daniel, and Cassandra. Joss Whedon owns all of the others.**

**Rating: PG 13. I promise. At least I'm not planning anything above it. There might be some harsh language, a bit of violence, and a few 'references', but nothing above kissing is going to be described without warning.**

**A/N(Please tell me if I missed something I had to do. Thanks! Okay, now, onto the story. I hope you enjoy. As promised, all of this is set in the Buffy universe in this section. : ) )**

**(And thankyou to Miss. Lesley! Yay, my first review! Thanks… I can't repeat it enough. For everything, and especially the hints you gave me.**

**Anyway, to your question, the kids and what happened with them will be revealed pretty soon. What do you mean by the witches singing, however? I'll work on the scenes and the demarking… thankyou very much for your suggestions: ) )**

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

I could tell she was wondering how long I'd been standing there by the doorway. Slayer must've been very preoccupied if she hadn't sensed me. I smirked at her, and she shot a deadly look back at me. Well, well, well… if looks were as sharp as stakes, I'd be dusted for certain. I was surprised, I'll admit, when she stopped attempting to stake me with her eyes and actually scrutinized me. I didn't really have any further time to think about it, though, when the Whelp rushed at me. What the…?

A part of me screamed at the foreign object lodged in my cranium that stopped me from blocking his attack. The rest of me took over and dodged like I used to. Hell, even though I wasn't really expecting it, I was still fast enough. Angelus hadn't meant to, but he'd trained me well. Pain, pain, and more pain made a good student.

The Whelp crashed into the wall behind me and crumpled to the ground, but he still got up again and rushed me again. Bloody hell, I swear that humans are _not_ supposed to recover so damned quickly! But the Slayer was already there to stop him.

"Xander!"

He looked awfully surprised. I got to admit, I was too. Then again, I did have information… "Buffy, you just told us that he's working for Adam. And you're letting himlive?"

Come on, did you expect me to let him make a mistake that I could correct? "Um, still dead, last time I checked."

"Shut up!" he turned back to the Slayer. "Come on, let me stake him good and proper."

Now that got me. I'd have liked to see the clumsy idiot try. "As if you could," I scoffed.

"Shut up, Fangboy! I mean…"

Fangboy? Fangboy! I would've choked on that one if I was still alive. Who'd the Whelp think he was talking about?

"Xander, he's got information. Valuable information," the Watcher reminded him.

"Yeah," I smirked, ducking behind the Slayer just in case the Whelp had a stake handy. "So you can't kill me."

This time all of the ruddy Scoobies glowered at me before they continued their little argument. "Shut up!"

"Look, Xander, he's just going to help us."

Wow, I guess I should feel honoured, I thought sarcastically. The Slayer's sticking up for me. Who'd have thought? Of course, the only reason she's sticking up for me is because she needs me at the moment, but y'know…

"And how do you know this information?" the Whelp turned on me, ever doubting. "How do we know it's real?"

"Because I can prove…"

Before I could finish, the Watcher cut me off. "That is a good question," he looked at me, and I could almost feel those damned eyes staking me just like his Slayer had. Bloody hell, what was with these people and eye-staking? "How can we trust you? Especially after that little trick you pulled on us."

"Look, you…"

"Yeah," Red spoke up. "How are we supposed to listen to what you say now?"

"Well, you see…" I tried again, but this time it was the Slayer who interrupted me.

"She's got a point," the Slayer glared at me again. I was beginning to get awfully tired of that glare. "In case you haven't noticed, Spike, you're in a room with four people who can all very easily, and with great reason, kill you. Talk. Now. You've had your little sleep…"

"I would, but…"

"Whoah, hang on a second. He slept here!"

"Will you just…!" Okay, now I was getting really pissed off.

"It was my mum's fault. He came in here and…"

I couldn't keep it in any longer. Come on, who can blame a guy? I'd been standing there for the last five minutes, and none of them would let me talk! "Bloody hell! Will you all shut up and listen to me!"

The Slayer glared at me again. I felt very, very tempted to tell her I could only take so many eye stakings. "Fine. Talk. Now."

"Well I would, but all of you seem damned intent on cuttin' me off every single time I start! So can I talk now!"

I received four bloody identical eye stakings. I wouldn't even be normal dust at this rate. More like super concentrated molecules...

"Oh bloody hell," I swore again. –Okay, have to calm down.-

"Adam came to me a couple of weeks ago and said he needed my help. He said that if I gave him what he wanted, he'd get this chip out of my cranium."

"I _knew_ it!" the Whelp cried. "You were planning to murder us all in our sleep!"

"Well, yeah?" Finally! It was my turn in this little game. I gave him a good one. "What of it? Hello? I'm evil, dammit! The Big Bad?"

Before he could reply, his last words hit me. Instantly, I felt wounded at his assumptions. " 'Sides, I wasn't going to kill you in your sleep," I snorted. "Would have been no fun."

"Will you two get back on topic?" the Slayer demanded. "What did Adam want you to do?"

"You've already figured it out," I pointed at her. "He wanted me to split you up, and get you where he wanted you to be when everything started. He also wanted me to give you those disks. Said that they would tell you what his plan was."

"That doesn't make any sense," the Watcher frowned. "Why would Adam want us to know his plan?"

"You'll understand," I said tiredly. Seemed like the little nap o' mine had only taken the edge of my exhaustion. Stupid sleep. All I wanted to do was collapse on the spot and sleep for another century, but I knew that when I woke up, I'd either be dust or faced by a very brassed off Slayer. So I forced away the damned cloudy things that were beginning to cover my eyes. "Well, Red? Have they decrypted yet?"

"No… I haven't had a look at them since this morning. I was still trying to figure it out. I think it has something to do with a hexagonic key code…"

"Whatever. It's not important. It should be decrypting itself around…" I looked at my watch and grinned half-heartedly. "Now."

"What do you mean?" the Whelp asked, puzzled. "What, is it programmed to self-decrypt?"

"Yeah, that's what I'm saying," I rolled my eyes. Geez, did he need me to spell it out for him? "Do me a favour, Red, and set up your laptop."

"How did you know I've got my laptop here?"

"I saw it outside in the hallway. Now will you just go and get it?" I never was that patient.

"Hang on a sec, Fangboy. We still haven't cleared up why you're helping us, when you so aptly pointed out before that you wanted to kill us."

I felt all four pairs of eyes return to me accusingly. Bloody hell. I sighed, loudly, to portray my point. -I might as well…. Get the embarrassment over and done with.-

"I overheard some of his sidekicks talking," I sniffed. I scowled at them as they appeared to fight the giggles. "What?" I demanded.

"You sound like Giles," Red giggled.

I glared at her, and then continued. "Turns out that the walking Frankenstein _was_ going to remove my chip… and my head along with it."

The Slayer burst out laughing with the rest of them, and before I could stop myself, my insides twisted in hideous knots as I heard the familiar mocking tone in them. No-one seemed to notice when I shrunk back into a corner, automatically trying to hide. Over a century as one-fourth of the Scourge of Europe and what I suffered at the hands of Angelus would never erase that sickening, nauseous feeling that swamped me every time someone laughed at me like that. I'd gotten used to it with Angelus, Darla, and even my Dru, sometimes. My black goddess... even she'd laughed at me like that, sometimes. I consoled myself, thinking they were like that with everyone. Still hurt, though. Actually, I was surprised I was reacting so badly to this. Normally, I threw back some cocky comment, smirked, or took out all of my hurt and anger on their dead body. Anything besides shrivelling up like I was now.

And I wasn't even capable of killing them all, now.All I could do was shrink in my corner, helpless, and wish that those glares everyone had been giving me had actually dusted me. I'm pathetic. Absolutely, utterly, pathetic. Make fun o' me, and if I care about your opinion, I'm dead. I'm deader than I already am. It just brings me right back to William, the Bloody Awful Poet. I was surprised that I felt so strongly about the Scoobies' opinions. Who was I kidding? In fact, why was I reacting so badly? Big bad... big bad.. big bad... big bad... yeah, I was the big bad... big bad...

The words slowly brought me back to the reality. They were still laughing at me, but as I came back, the Slayer broke off, and choked, "Poetic justice, anyone?" sending them all back into gales of laughter.

Later, I wondered why it was really so funny.

Anyway,those three simple words crushed me further into the dirt, just like three other words had crushed me a million times over my life and unlife. If it was possible, I felt even sicker.Eventually,thesoddin' Scoobies' laughter died down, andI finally registered that they were looking at me strangely, wondering what I was doing. Somehow, I managed to speak, but the words came out more as a funny growl. "Not funny, Slayer."

"Oh, I'm finding it rather amusing, Anyone else?"

I swallowed, and then forced an irritated look onto my face. "Look, we can play Laugh-at-Spike later, okay? Red, can you show them?"

"Sure thing," she already had the laptop set up and on the table. I wasn't the only one waiting impatiently as she typed in her password. I just wanted anything to distract me now from the mocking laughter still ringing in my ears. When she finally opened up the document, it was in the process of decrypting itself. She uttered an indignant snort.

"That is so not fair! I had it, I really did. It's… it's like when you've got the answer to a riddle or something, and someone just blurts it out!"

I wasn't the only one who glanced at her, and she blushed slightly. She looked kinda cute when she did that… "I mean… Yippee! We've got the information."

The Slayer was already scanning the document though. "Well… it says a bunch of stuff about 314 that we already knew, but also something about…"

"A Final Phase," Red finished for her. "Something about Adam creating a race of cyber-demonoids. And a secret lab inside the Initiative. It doesn't say where, though."

Questioningly, they looked at me. I nodded. The feeling that I was going to vomit had already started to ebb away.

"Yeah. You probably don't know much about it, but the Initiative's overflowing. They've got three demons to a cell."

"No, I've noticed it," the Slayer replied, her eyes still scanning the screen. "Not as many nasty things I've had to kill while out on patrol. Riley told me the containment cells were flooded as well. Man, I've got to give this demon his do. He really thought this one out."

"What do you mean?"

I answered. "Think about all those nice… what do you call them?" –Good old mental blanks…- "Ah, yes. Think about all those nice commando people runnin' around in there. And the Demons. What if they could attack from the inside? What do you get, then, when you have 'em all together?"

"Demons versus Soldiers," the Whelp realized. "Massacre, massacre."

"And a nice pile of body parts for Adam to use," Red commented.

"Hit the nail on the head, you two."

"Diabolical, and yet, really gross."

"Does anyone else miss the Mayor?" the Whelp asked. " 'I just want to be a big snake'?"

"What's this about a big snake?" I asked, interested. As usual, they ignored me when I wasn't spouting out information or trying to kill them. Or just annoying the hell out of them…

"But I still don't get why he would want Buffy to know," the Watcher was squinting at the computer. "It doesn't make sense."

"Oh, it makes perfect sense, Watcher," I disagreed.

"What's that supposed to mean?" he queried.

The Slayer cut me off before I could answer. "He wants me to know about his bad guy assembly line. He obviously wants me to go down there into the battlefield and stop it. Add the Slayer into Spike's little equation. A lot more dead people and demons and body parts. Plus some choice body parts of my own… God, do you know how ewww that is?"

"It could be just me, but I don't think hybrid Frankenstein guy is really going to care about the 'ewww' factor."

"Stating the obvious much, Whelp?" I muttered.

"Shut up, Fangboy. But seriously, isn't he worried that Buffy might kill, say, _him_?"

"No," the Slayer murmured. "He's really not."

"Obviously," I snorted. "He _is_ one hell of a powerful guy, you know."

"Shut up, Fangboy."

"Oh come on, have a bit of originality, Whelp," I prodded him, smirking. Well, well, I was feeling better already."That's exactly what you said two seconds ago."

"Fine. Shut up, Deadboy Junior."

-Deadboy Junior? Deadboy Junior! Deadboy? The _Poof_- "Hey, I am not…"

"Honestly, people, you're all acting like children."

I glared incredulously at the Watcher. Humph, glares all round today. I could tell he was trying not to smile, and 'cos he was British, he was doing a fairly good job. "Yes, you included for all that you're a century older than most of us. Buffy said something about a plan, and you said you had one. Would you care to enlighten us?"

I took a deep breath. This was it. If they didn't like what me and my brain had concocted, I'd probably be dust. "Right. Sure. Got it. Let's sit down."

The things in my stomach weren't butterflies. Really they weren't. Big Bads didn't have butterflies in their undead stomachs. They had… I dunno, actually.

They sat, rather warily, I noticed, but I didn't. Instead, I paced around with characteristic energy overload. I had an incredible itching to go out and kill something to calm myself down. Despite the blood the Slayer had brought me, my demon was itching for more. I ground my teeth and dug my nails into my skin. As the blood welled up, I could feel it retreat, mollified only for the moment.

I could feel their eyes watching me again, all gradually becoming annoyed.

Just before the Slayer opened her mouth, probably to demand answers, I found my voice and started spewing out words so fast they probably could barely understand me.

"Look, I know that you're not going to like this, but the only way Adam is going to start his plan is if he sees the Slayer in there. Otherwise he's just going to sit tight and wait until she comes. He's bloody stubborn like that, you know."

"Sounds like a certain peroxided vamp who happens to be standing right in front of us," the Whelp muttered.

"Shut up, Whelp. I know you're not going to like this, but Slayer, you're going to have to go in."

Even as the Watcher, Red, and the Whelp started protesting, I was surprised to see that she was nodding her head. "I thought as much. He seems to have a rather one-tracked mind, sometimes."

"Talk about it," I scowled. "Anyway, Red, here's another disk for you to shove in your lil' comp."

She eyed it suspiciously, then replaced the other one. "What's in it?" she asked as she opened it.

"The stuff I got when I hacked into the Initiative," I explained, proudly. As a minor hacker, I hadn't thought that I'd be able to do it. Took me long enough, though.As top secret as the Initiative was, they'd left a couple of loopholes... because they'd tried to protect it _too_ much. Ironic, eh?"There's a plan."

The blueprint of the thing flashed up onto her screen, and I took a brief second to marvel at the resolution before moving on to what I was going to explain. " 'Kay, d'you see the electrical conduits?"

"Yep," they all chorused. Except for the Watcher, of course.

I stabbed my finger at the ones that I'd studied. "See these? They look like they're headed to nowhere. A place right behind 314. I'm bettin' you all the smokes in the world that that's the secret lab. Adam's lab. The one for the Final Phase. That's where he's gonna be. Incidentally, that's where dear Captain Cardboard is, too."

I immediately regretted that last sentence when the Slayer slammed me up against the closest wall available. "_What!_" she demanded, shaking me. Damn, her little hands were strong. "Riley's in there!"

"Calm down, Slayer," I half-choked. "Adam's not going to kill him."

She released me, and I spent a couple of moments rubbing my throat and gasping for no apparent reason. Habit, I guess. "Bloody hell, Slayer! If you want me to talk, you're gonna have to stop trying to kill me."

She looked at me, her face unreadable. I was almost glad. If her face hadn't been, I knew the look of absolute contempt that would've been on them. I knew it intimately. "If I wanted to dust you, you'd already be dusted."

"He's right, you know," the Watcher coughed slightly, as if he was ashamed about sticking up for me. Again, I was surprised, until I heard his next sentence. "If we're going to get information out of him, you're going to have to restrain yourself."

I sneered bitterly, surprising myself. Why should I care, after all? But then, it hurt if someone thought you were nothing. No matter who they were. "Thanks, Watcher," I said sarcastically. "As I was saying, that's his base where he makes all his lil' demon/human guys. If he's not there, he's going to be in the caves at the back. They join."

"So how are we going to get in there?"

I eyed her with a steady look. "Now, don't stake me when I say this, Slayer. I've got the plan to get in. It's not nice and safe and cosy, but I think it'll work. The only thing I don't have, though, is how you're all going to kill Adam. You're gonna have to work that out yourselves."

She returned the stare. "Okay. We got it. Tell us your plan."

I breathed deeply. Good. Very good. It was going good. They hadn't staked me yet. One whole world of good. Oh bloody hell. I was talkin' like them already.

I quickly outlined the plan, finishing by reminding them that they still had to come up with something to beat Adam. I think I even surprised myself at that. Well, today was full of surprises. If you'd told me a week ago that I'd band with the Slayer against my hope of salvation, I'd have laughed in your face, and if I'd been chipless, I'd have decapitated you. Probably played with your guts as well, before snacking. Just for the Big Bad image, of course. I'd make sure you were dead, first. I only do that kinda stuff when Angelus or Dru are around. Really. Seriously. You don't believe me? You just want me to get on with it?

Fine.

Anyway...but now? Not only was I doing that, I'd actually formulated a plan that didn't seem as half-witted as my normal ones that even I had to admit didn't generally work. And hacked into the government. And I never remembered having ever spoken so much. Surprisingly –that word was cropping up a lot- I almost felt… comfortable. Despite the bout of laughing previously. I knew my place here. And I knew them. And I knew that they would kill me if they had the chance. Yet I still felt comfortable.

Weird.

I was shaken by my thoughts as the Whelp looked strangely at me. He wasn't the only one. I felt like a zoo exhibit.

"What?" I demanded, getting twitchy.

The Watcher looked at me speculatively. "Tell me again, Spike, why you are helping us? And why I, for one, am actually beginning to trust you?"

I smirked, but then I suddenly saw the stake in his hand.

8 8 8

**(Wow. Sorry, guys, I got a bit carried away there. Apologies if it's long and boring, but please, please, PLEASE review. I wanna know what you think. : ) Thank you again, Miss. Lesley. You brightened up my day, literally. : ) )**


	5. Let the Games Begin

**Chapter 5: Let the Games Begin**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters except for Mia, Bryan, Daniel, and Cassandra. Joss Whedon owns all of the others.**

**Rating: PG 13. I promise. At least I'm not planning anything above it. There might be some harsh language, a bit of violence, and a few 'references', but nothing above kissing is going to be described without warning.**

**(Thanks to anyone who's actually reading this : ) I'm honoured. Please, Reviews! They make me write faster, and do a world of good to my sagging ego : ). I hope you enjoy this part. Thanks again to Miss. Lesley. :) )**

**8 8 8**

Cassandra lay in the hospitable bed, thinking again how utterly ridiculous the last week had been. They had actually caught the gangsters who were being tried for assault, but the thing that amazed her more than them being beaten up was the fact that she had stood up for Mia and Bryan.

They were enemies. Something was wrong here. Enemies do not stand up for enemies. Friends, yes. But not enemies.

Riiight…

Even more hideously ironic was the fact that neither Brian nor Mia had actually gotten really hurt, and they were the ones who'd started it off in the first place. Of course, they had suffered heavy bruising and a few minor broken bones, but as she remembered Daniel's injuries, she winced. His femur had been broken in three different places. That was just… nasty. Turned out that their attackers had been drunk. Alcohol, testosterone, muscle, and a sadistic nature really didn't go well together.

She shifted, and winced as her own broken ribs exploded with pain. At least they were getting time off school. But it seemed so unreal. They'd heard of that particular gang and the beatings they dealt out to those who crossed them, but she'd never expected it to happen to her. She'd always thought the stories had been hyped up, as they had never been arrested, or even complained about to the police. They had confirmed her suspicions. It seemed that the leader had had a very bad day, a money deal with a rival gang leaving him with a substantial loss. They'd gotten drunk, and then they'd taken out the frustration on them.

Her parents would have killed her for getting into that situation if they'd cared, she thought bitterly. No, the only thing she was worrying about was money. The hospital bills were a problem. And another problem…

Guilt washed over her as she thought of Daniel again. It had been her fault. If only she hadn't stepped in…

But then, Mia and Bryan would have had these injuries. Of course, she'd have preferred it if Daniel had remained unhurt, but it seemed that she couldn't win, either way.

Sighing, she lay down again, thanking God that at least her legs weren't broken like Daniel's. Her arm had been snapped like a toothpick in the first assault. Everything was very bad, painful, and as she'd thought before, highly unrealistic. A few bruises she could understand, but why the gang had a penchant for breaking bones, she had no idea…

Cassandra only noticed the strange dizziness when the world swirled around her, and then turned entirely black.

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

Even I was surprised, I'll admit, when Giles pulled out the finely honed stake. I was concentrating more on thinking about the seemingly half-baked plan that Spike had thrown together, and then realizing that it actually might work. Spike almost leapt backwards at the sight, and I moved to stop Giles. But then he started speaking again, and I fell back.

"Spike, this is your last chance. If you are lying to us, I'm offering you a quick death now. And if I find out that you've betrayed us again, I can almost guarantee you'll wish that you'd taken it."

A hint of the Ripper flashed in his eyes, and I could see that the vamp believed him. I half-expected him to admit that yes, he had betrayed us. But the sincerity with which he'd gestured, and babbled, and prodded at Willow's computer kinda convinced me. Maybe I was just too gullible. And… damn, how did Giles manage to sound so Rippery, yet still so… British?

"I can assure you, Watcher, I'm not lying. Now put that thing away before someone gets hurt."

"Tell us why you're helping us then."

Spike looked exasperated. "Oh bloody hell. I already told you. It's because Adam was going to double-cross me," his eyes flashed golden for a split second. "And I really hate it when people double-cross me. I'd also like to keep my head, thank-you very much."

"What makes you think that we won't take it off for you after this?" Xander asked. Typical Xander…

Spike smirked at him. "I'm not stupid," he turned around to face me. "Slayer, unless you promise not to stake me or get in my way, I'm not helping you."

"Haven't I already made a similar promise?" I asked, slightly irritated.

"Making sure," he shrugged implacably, that irritating smirk decorating his face. "I'm not going through all of this just so you can stake me afterwards."

"We wouldn't do that," Willow started to reassure him. At my glare, she quickly back-pedalled. "Okay, maybe we would."

"Well? Do you promise?"

I was tempted for a second to tell him we didn't need his help and stake him, but I quickly suppressed it. In this fight against Adam, we needed all the help we could get. Grudgingly, I nodded. "Promise."

He visibly relaxed. The tension that had filled him ever since he first came here slowly drained away, and he actually let out an audible sigh of relief. "Good. Okay, now you guys think up a way to kill Adam. I've done my bit."

With that, he collapsed in a chair, and looked expectantly at us, waiting.

"Well then," Giles started. "Let's get on to Adam. How do we kill him?"

The answer came automatically to me. "Uranium-Cornium, his power source. We've got to remove it. It's somewhere in his chest, near his spine, according to Riley."

"Oh that's great," Xander threw up his hands. "Why don't we get him to lie down so we can do some exploratory surgery?

"Well, what about magic?" Willow chimed in. "Some kind of uranium extractor?"

We all looked at her. She blushed. "Okay, well, I was _trying_…"

Giles broke the silence like he usually did. His glasses wobbled on his nose as he held up his finger triumphantly. "A paralysis spell!"

"Yay!" Xander exclaimed. "Now how do we work it?"

Giles flicked through the books on his shelves, until he found the one he was looking for. He thumbed through the pages until he found it, and then he frowned.

"Uh oh," I said. "What's wrong?"

Giles didn't even look up as he continued frowning his very, very, British frown. "The problem is that the caster must be an experienced witch… within striking range… and the spell is in Sumerian..."

"And this is what you get when you take French in High School instead of Sumerian," Xander joked.

"Geez, what was I thinking?" I laughed.

"So, no problem, then," Xander reasoned. "All we need is combo-Buffy! Buffy with the Slayer strength, Giles' multi-lingual know-how, and Willow's witchy power. And me, of course, to hold all of ya together."

We gave him the same look we'd given Willow, only this time, we didn't have arched eyebrows. He mistook it anyway. "Yeah, don't tell me, I know I'm full of helpful suggestions," he grumbled sarcastically.

Giles pushed his glasses up. "As a matter of fact, you are."

I smiled, and then I saw Spike studying me through half-lidded eyes. "What?"

He looked at me, matching my grin. "Well, when are we gonna get this show on the road?"

"Giles?"

Giles and Willow sat, poring over the book. At our question, they looked up briefly.

"Tonight."

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

"Nervous?" Willow asked Xander, fidgeting slightly herself. Anyone could see that she felt uncertain.

"No, I'm just full of that Kamikaze spirit," Xander replied.

"Hey, I'm going to be here watching your back, you know," Spike grinned cockily.

"Yeah. I'm _sooo_ grateful for that," Xander sniped back.

"Now now, Xander. Just because this is going to fail doesn't mean we have to be so negative," Giles commented as they finally reached the place they were going to split up.

"The enjoining spell isn't powerful enough to take down Adam?" Buffy asked worriedly.

"Oh, it's very powerful. And also extremely dangerous."

They paused outside the caves, and then Spike nodded at Buffy. "Here's where you leave us, Slayer. Get your abseiling stuff ready and get to the frat house. We'll be in place in ten minutes, so I suggest you hurry."

"No problem to it," Buffy grinned. Then her face dropped, suddenly, as if in realization. Glancing at Willow, she nodded, slightly. Before Xander knew it, he was being hugged on both sides by both the redhead and the blonde.

"Xander, you know we love you, right?" Buffy asked, her eyes wide and shining.

" 'Cause we totally do," Willow declared, hugging him to her even tighter.

Xander looked from one to the other, and Spike was pleased to note that a growing horror seemed to encompass him. "Oh God, we're all going to die, aren't we?"

"No, we just missed you." Buffy hugged him again, and then reluctantly released him, only to turn on Giles.

"And you know, we… we love you too, right, Giles?"

Giles smiled down fondly at his Slayer and Willow, stroking their hair, even as a part of him was supremely shocked by such an open display of affection. "I know, Buffy, Willow. And I…"

He cleared his throat, but couldn't seem to say it. Instead, he felt piercingly blue eyes bore through his back, and a exasperated sigh. Disgusted, he sighed, disentangled himself, and turned to look at his fellow, albeit dead, Englishman. "What is it?" he snapped.

"You lot make me sick," Spike shot back. "Are you always with the huggin' and oohin' and ahhin' before a fight? If I'd known, I would've ambushed you lot and you'd never have known it."

"Shut up, Captain Peroxide," Xander summed up succinctly. "Let's go now, anyway. Before I stake him."

"You're right," Willow said, shaking her head. "Okay, um… I guess we should get into our positions?"

"Yes, we should get ready," Giles agreed. "Up to a quick run, Buffy?"

Buffy nodded, and sprinted away. "I'll meet you in 314," she called back over her shoulder.

Spike watched her run off, and then began leading the three others to where they had to be. He had examined the map of the Initiative extensively in those three days, but he'd also done some snooping around himself. No-one would find them, where they were. They'd be safe. It was almost as if Maggie Walsh had deliberately kept the small room adjoining 314 secret and sewer connections running underneath it for him.

As he lost sight of the last glimpse of gold, he felt his unbeating heart jump, and a cocky smile lit his face.

_Let the games begin._

8 8 8

I still actually don't understand what had happened to me during those days I'd spent huddled in my crypt, planning. I've never really planned that much, you know.Just jumped in, with a 'what the hell' kinda thing. I've never needed to plan. I just feel the thrill of the fight,whether I win or lose, it doesn't matter. Of course, I generally win. That's why I'm standin' here right now. But I'venever really planned. Think the only reason I did it this time was 'cos I knew if I didn't, I'd have a stake in my heart, and this time, I couldn't fight back. So, during those days,I think something just jumped on me, tackled me when I wasn't looking. Damned unsporting, if you ask me. If you're going to attack someone, you should at least give 'em a fair warning so it's a fair fight. I've got some sense of honour. Sure, I know I said I'd ambush them if I ever caught 'em unawares and hugging, but d'you think I'd actually do it? There's quite a lot of differences between what I say and what I do, you know.

Oh, you didn't? Well then you'd better just wise up, then.

Anyway, I reckon I was so deep in concentrating on hacking into the Initiative that my demon and whatever had a little tussle while I wasn't aware of 'em. Giles calls it my heart. I call it 'that stupid prick' or 'bloody conscience', depending what mood I'm in. Sure, you lot can all yabber on about a soul being a bloody conscience, but I don't think so. Remember? Soulless evil demon? D'you really think Angelus could turn into the great Poof if you just added a conscience? A soul's something deeper. Stronger. Sometimes it seems close, sometimes it doesn't, no matter what you have. It's something that's so powerful, it's hard to explain. It's something that all the scientists and philosophers in the world can work on, but never will be able to categorize and file neatly away on their stupid bloody clipboards. They can make their theories, and if they want, they can do little experiments, but they'll never get it exactly right. Because it's not meant to be gotten exactly right. It's just supposed to be, without getting analysed and all.

Bloody hell, I'm soundin' like the Poof himself. That's it. I'm done for this session. Stupid prick! Talkin' so nice and sweet just to know how this Big Bad ticks. You… you… stupid prick!

What, you're insulted? Oh… you already know bits of the story? Pfeh, you don't know half of it… wait… you're actually tryin' to help me? By writin' all of this down? You've got to be kidding me!

Fine, fine, fine. Come tomorrow. And if I'm drinking, leave.

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**(Sorry, I know it's rather short. More of a deep breath before plunging on, I guess. I hope you enjoyed it. Please, please, please review: ) )**


	6. Primeval

**Chapter 6: Primeval**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters except for Mia, Bryan, Daniel, and Cassandra. Joss Whedon owns all of the others.**

**Rating: PG 13. I promise. At least I'm not planning anything above it. There might be some harsh language, a bit of violence, and a few 'references', but nothing above kissing is going to be described without warning.**

**A/N (Thanks to anyone who's actually reading this : ) I'm honoured. Please, Reviews! They make me write faster, and do a world of good to my sagging ego : ). I hope you enjoy this part. Also, many thanks to Miss. Lesley and Claudie. G. You guys really made my day! By the way, Claudie. G, the relation between the cast will come soon. I just hope you all won't hate me. And I'll try to work on the character talking proble,. Thanks!)**

**Okay, Enjoy!**

**8 8 8**

Hugged by his leather duster, Spike was proving he was a brilliant actor. Kicking his legs nonchalantly as he sat on the small table, he betrayed none of the roiling fear… no, not fear, he chided himself, nervousness. Yeah, just nervousness. After all, if Adam realized that he had been betrayed, Spike didn't doubt at all that the torture Adam would inflict on him before staking him would surpass what the Initiative had done.

And that's bloody ironic, innit? Considerin' Adam really is part of the Initiative… or used to be.-

The bleached blonde kept his eyes firmly trained upon the screen still showing the empty corridor, just like Adam. To his calculations, Buffy should be appearing right about…

"Well, this is must see T.V," Spike smirked, unnecessarily pointing at the image of Buffy, accompanied by a large group of soldiers, walking down the corridor. "Look, there's the Slayer. Now, I believe we have one chip to be out?"

"She's alone," Adam said satisfactorily, ignoring him. He silently perused the situation for a few more seconds, and then smiled. "Very well. Forrest?"

The human/demon hybrid stepped up, and grabbed Spike. If his heart was still beating, it would have been thumping impossibly fast. Possibilities whirled through his mind as he wondered what was going to happen next.

"… I will honour our agreement and remove your chip."

Spike stared at him in amazement, wondering if teaming up with the Slayer had been a bad idea. But as soon as he saw the glint in Adam's eyes, he knew he hadn't.

"Take his head off."

Forrest grinned viciously, slamming Spike against the computers, but he was prepared. He brought his right hand up, which had hidden his lighter, and Forrest reeled back, screaming as his eye was engulfed. Freed from his grasp for a moment, Spike elbowed Forrest in the solar plexus and raced off to his next spot. Forrest started afterwards, but Adam just smiled.

"Leave him, there's nowhere to run."

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

"Colonel," Buffy tried, but she was cut off.

"You have some nerve, lady, waltzing into a government institution bearing weapons…"

Buffy sighed and rolled her eyes. "You haven't checked me yet? Unarmed. And I'm trying to warn you. Adam is here, Colonel. In the Initiative."

"Nice try," he sneered arrogantly. "Every inch of this place is under surveillance. A tick or a mouse couldn't come in here without us knowing it!"

"Including the secret lab?" Buffy asked innocently.

"Including everything!" he barked.

There was a silence as the Colonel stared at her for a while, then. She had to resist smirking at him as he looked around at all the soldiers surrounding them, and then back to her. "What secret lab?"

"The one that Adam's been using," she explained. "The one built for the final phase of the 314 project."

At the blank look in the Colonel's eyes, Buffy rolled hers again. "And you have no idea what I'm talking about."

"I know everything that goes on in here," he declared rigidly.

"Oh really? Well, how do you plan to get close enough to Adam to grab his power source?"

He glared at her, pausing for a little while before answering. "Hit him simultaneously with multiple taser blasts, and incapacitate him."

"Well, that's right up there with duck and run," Buffy snorted. "I've seen Adam hit by taser blasts. He feeds on it. So now you're going to provide him with an all you can eat buffet?"

"You have some nerve telling me about my business…"

At that Buffy snapped. She'd put up with this arrogant, ignorant idiot for too long. "Your business? This isn't your business, it's _my_ business! You, the Initiative, the boys at the Pentagon, you are in way over your heads! Messing with primeval forces you have absolutely no comprehension of!"

"And I suppose you do?" he sneered.

"I'm the Slayer," she stated fiercely, feeling a strange sense of pride surge through her as she made her stand. "You're playing on _my_ turf."

The Colonel stared at the five foot, three inch blonde Slayer. He wasn't the only one who had suddenly felt power radiating off her in waves. Composing himself, he snarked back. "Up there, maybe. But down here? I'm in control."

Ironically, at that exact moment, the lights went out, and the alarm fired.

"Colonel! All power is down! The Hostiles have escaped!"

Buffy merely leaned on the wall and watched, casually as the suddenly ashen man moved to the computers. "How many!"

The soldier gulped. "All of them, sir."

"Colonel, it's Adam. Get your men out of here, and let me go," Buffy lost all of her nonchalance as easily as if a mask had dropped from her. "I'm the only one who can stop him!"

He glared at her again, ignorance and arrogance getting the better of him. "Alright men, hit the armoury. You, guard her. This girl is under arrest, understand? Everyone, follow me."

Buffy rolled her eyes as the Colonel ordered the one paltry soldier to guard her. As soon as the rest were out of earshot, she quickly turned on him. Smiling as she felt the adrenaline rushing. Everything was dark, none of the doors were locked except for the ones to the outside, and there was a big, bad, demon ass that she needed to kick. Despite the warnings of the apocalypse that would come if she failed, Buffy was ready.

"Nice speech, Slayer."

Even Spike's presence wasn't enough to bring her mood down, but now she moved into Slayer-mode, grinning wickedly. "Are we all set?"

"All pumped and ready to go," he smirked. "Come with me."

She rolled her eyes again, and followed him through the strange near-darkness of the Initiative corridors. Presently, they heard loud cries and screams, and a light ahead grew steadily brighter.

"I thought all the electricity was out," Buffy whispered.

Spike scanned the far room with his vampiric eyesight. "I think good old Frankenstein thought that battles in the light would even out the kills… what with most demons naturally being able to see in the dark and all."

"It'd figure," Buffy frowned, but then the same grin was back in place. "Ready, Spike?"

"I'm always ready, Slayer."

They leapt into the crowded room, battle-cries sounding in their throats. For Spike, he felt the fierce surge of joy as he waded through demons, unconsciously saving humans as he went. Bones snapped, muscles tore. With a savage scream of primeval rage, he separated a demon's head from his body, all at once.

But the chipped vampire wasn't the only one cutting a swathe of destruction. Buffy kept her wicked grin firmly plastered in place, moving like an acrobat as she went. As she felt the near hysterical laughter bubble out of her, she felt the selfsame fierce urge from deep within, and she gave into it. Spike's scream mixed with her laughter as they each ripped apart their foes simultaneously.

If the soldiers of the Initiative weren't so well trained, they would have stared, fixated, on the pair that were wreaking bloody devastation upon the demons they were fighting. Some, however, took the time to gape disbelieving at the raw strength and violence that seemed to crackle in energy waves around the two.

Buffy felt a pure force inside her that threatened to overwhelm her. It was…

_Primeval._

888

_Images swirled past her, but try though she might, when she tried to focus on them, they melted away from her. Ineffectively, she grasped for them, but they slipped through ethereal fingertips. Where was she?_

_Another figure, another image. A snake, rearing up as if to strike, but then it faded away again before she tried to determine the details._

_And then another. Someone was screaming…_

_And then another. It was a glowing golden orb, glimmering like there was a soft internal fire inside. Inside, there were even more images, flowing together almost seamlessly…_

_And then something crashed inside her mind. The utterly horrific image of something so inexplicably, unexplainably, evil, that it sent her reeling. She crashed to nonexistent knees in this place as waves of nausea overcame her._

"_Stop!" she forced out, hoarsely._

_Instantly, everything slowed as if the images had been liquid that had instantly turned to ice. Shakily, she stood, and wondered if, in this place, she could retch._

"_Okay," she rasped. "What the hell am I doing here?"_

_A ghostly figure immediately appeared by her side. Looking up through half-swollen eyes, she vaguely noted that he… she… it… seemed to be genderless. Clad in a long white robe, he/she/it merely looked down on her, and smiled._

"_What is this?"_

"_This? It is an extension of your mind, only. It's what you want it to be."_

"_Okay," she nodded slowly. "That makes some sense. But why am I here?"_

"_Magic shrouds you. Magic engulfs you. Magic flows through you. You're surrounded by it, and it's suffocating you."_

"_Magic? You've got to be kidding me. Magic doesn't exist."_

_The he/she/it… being, she finally decided, just looked at her. "You know better than that."_

"_No I don't," she retorted. "And what do you mean, anyway?"_

"_I mean what I mean. You've been cursed."_

"_Cursed? There's no such thing…"_

"_Where does you poetry flow from?" the being interrupted her impatiently. "Where does life come from? Where do paintings and art come from? Where does music come from?"_

"_I don't know… inspiration?"_

"_Magic. Even in your dimension, it is powerful. It's just that the vast majority of your race has failed to reach it."_

"_My dimension?"_

"_Yes… soon, it will no longer be your dimension, however."_

_The next words that burst out of her mouth surprised her. "Where's Daniel?"_

_The mist that surrounded them parted, and Daniel, as ethereal as her, appeared. "What's going on?" he asked calmly._

"_What's going on?" Cassandra asked in disbelief, still frozen in her shocked, bewildered state. "Is that all you can say?"_

_Daniel wanted to chuckle, but he decided not to. Cassandra didn't usually get flustered… okay, perhaps she did. But whenever she did, she was quite… funny…_

"_Now that the both of you are here, we may begin… begin… begin… begin…"_

_Cassandra and Daniel both turned to where the being had been, but he/she/it was gone, leaving in its place only an echo…_

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**(Please, Read and Review!)**


	7. The Joining

**Chapter 7: The Joining**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters except for Mia, Bryan, Daniel, and Cassandra. Joss Whedon owns all of the others.**

**Rating: PG 13. I promise. At least I'm not planning anything above it. There might be some harsh language, a bit of violence, and a few 'references', but nothing above kissing is going to be described without warning.**

**A/N (Thanks a million to Miss. Lesley, Claudie. G, and Random Glitch. My first reviewers:D )**

**(My bad. Didn't mean to be so busy… not that you can blame me, right? I mean, it's all the school's fault. Really!**

**Anyway, Chapter 7 is here, now. Enjoy! And Review!)**

**8 8 8**

Buffy snapped out of her homicidal rage with a gasp, noticing Spike's unneeded inhalation next to her as they fought. Their eyes met, and then together, they looked at the huge fight that was still erupting around them. No… it couldn't even be called a fight. It was an outright massacre. Something was…

"Something's wrong, Slayer!" Spike yelled over the screaming. "That's never happened to me before, and I'd wager it's never happened to you either. "

"Whatever happened, we have to get to 314 now!"

"I'm with you on that one," Spike grumbled.

Scanning the room together, crouched down behind an army vehicle, Buffy swore. This room was larger than she'd remembered it. There was still a hundred metre stretch to go until the door, the red light above it seeming to almost mock them as they glared at it. They'd only managed to reach halfway across the room before, in the strange killing craze…

What was with that, anyway?-

Spike's voice drew her from her thoughts. "Slayer, we're gonna have to make a run for it. Without being affected by whatever it was back there. Otherwise, we're gonna stand a very small chance about making it to the other side."

"Ready when you are," Buffy replied.

Spike merely raised his scarred eyebrow, and repeated what he'd said to her previously.

"I'm always ready, Slayer."

They took a deep, (for one, unneeded) breath, and then burst out of cover.

A raging Fyarl demon ran at her first, and she fended it off with expert precision. There was a small twist in her, as she smilingly remembered when Giles had transformed into one, courtesy of a small spell performed by his old friend, Ethan Rayne.

But this was not Giles. This was a demon, almost drowning in the primeval energy that seemed to be encompassing them all. And though she felt something within her twitch as it stirred from sleep again, she fought it down. No time… no time…

"Slayer, duck!"

She heard his voice, but she didn't understand. The Fyarl demon had just toppled at her feet, so what was wrong? She'd already seen the next demon moving towards her, and she was moving to intercept it...

Spike roared suddenly, and before she could stop him, he was upon her, throwing her to the ground with a cry. Quickly, her mind flashed images at him. –The chip… it's out… he's gonna… that bastard! He betrayed us and…-

She bucked under him, surprised when he actually went flying. He cursed, holding his head. In the midst of the gunfire, she hauled him up, and was about to punch him, when she realized two things. One, he was crying blood from the chip's explosion. Two, the leather duster he was wearing was wet with yet more viscous liquid, freshly sliding down the material. And she knew it wasn't from the demons he'd been fighting when she found the wounds.

"What…?"

Spike groaned, and wavered, but still stubbornly kept his feet. "You silly bint!" he half-yelled. "Didn't you see that stupid soldier-boy…?"

"You…"

In amazement, she realized what had happened, and the anger seeped from her, to be replaced by pure astonishment. "Can you walk?" sheasked.

Spike eyed the flashing 314 door, and winced, and for a flash, she could swear she saw his face crease in pain. Not physical pain, but something else. Then the mask was back again, and he was grinning cockily.

"Of course, Slayer," he smirked. "A couple of soddin' bullets can't take me down. Don't insult me."

"Why?"

It was then that he finally noticedthe bewilderment and suspicion in her eyes. Knowing the wrong words could get him staked, he wet his lips unconsciously, and tried to think. "Uh… Slayer?"

"Why the hell did you just save me when you've been trying to kill me for the last two years?"

Spike looked pointedly around them."Let's just kick Adam's ass, Slayer," Spike groaned. "We can talk about this later."

He wasn't surprised when she shook her head stubbornly. "I'm not about to trust you with all of our lives without knowing what exactly your intentions are. Now why did youpull that little stunt?"

"Because you're my ally," Spike replied bluntly."Nowlet's go, Slayer!"

Grudginglyshe complied. "We need to have a talk later. But right now... we need to run to 314."

He grimaced. "Got it."

With practiced grace, the two hunters ran from cover, gunfire blazing around them. The same energy tried to envelope them again, but this time it was their own beating it back, resisting the urge to fall into mindless violence. Fire flamed all around them, electricity spasmed the air between them as tasers targeted demons, rendering them incapacitated. The two blondes seemed to have a fiery halo decorating them as they finally reached the already bloodstained door, smashed the last demon away from it, and quickly closed and barricaded it.

Giles, Willow, and Xander were already waiting, and they all inhaled sharply at the sight of blood staining Buffy's white shirt from when Spike had been almost forced to half-lean on her. "Buffy, are you okay?"

"It's Spike's," Buffy replied. "He took a bullet for me."

"What?" Xander gaped. "Hang on a second, this is Deadboy Junior we're talking about…"

"We don't have time for this!" Spike snarled, one hand still clasped to his side, stained red with mixed blood. "If you're gonna save the ruddy soldier-boys, we're gonna have to get started!"

"Since when did you care?" Xander demanded.

"Since Frankenstein decided to kill me," Spike shot back bluntly. "Betrayal sucks, did you know that, Whelp? So I'm planning on squeezing every drop of satisfaction I can from seeing his face when this is over. Now let's get going!"

"As childish as his reasons are, he's right," Giles glanced towards Buffy.

"I know. The passage should be…" Buffy scanned the room, and noticed a small crack in one of the corners. She and Willow moved immediately to it, shoving the strange contraption that blocked them from accessing the Secret Lab out of the way. She tested the corner, and opened it. It moved sluggishly but smoothly, almost blinding them as bright light poured into the darkened room. Buffy looked back at the four faces behind her, silhouetted. Half in the light and half in the darkness.

Just like her…

"Is this place okay to be Magic Central?"

"It should do," Giles looked through the window at where the demons and soldiers were still battling it out. "It's probably the calmest place anywhere."

"Good," Buffy looked at them all. "Now I want you guys to seal the door behind me when I'm gone. Giles, how long until the spell kicks in?"

"About five minutes."

"I'll have to move fast then…"

Buffy turned to go, but Xander stopped her, worry creeping into his brown eyes.

"Buffy, I still don't like you going in alone."

The only answer she gave him was one of her rare, enchantingly beautiful smiles.

"I won't be."

And then she was gone. They sealed the door behind her, and went to work.

888

"_Begin… begin… begin…_

_You have been chosen,_

_Before the death of Time,_

_To follow the path,_

_And teach with song and Rhyme_

_Wisdom of the Ancient,_

_Follow bardic trail,_

_Companion to the Singer,_

_For Light to win, prevail_

_The First and Last have conquered,_

_Undo what has gone before,_

_Or else all Heart has failed,_

_And lost this endless War_

_This battle must be won_

_Though both sides may win and lose,_

_But the fighting must be done,_

_For the Heart to finally choose_

_Argue, lie, tell truths and hate,_

_Work against the other Fate,_

_Guide and save, protect and fall,_

_Die and live again for all…"_

The last thought Cassandra had before chaos swept over her again was that whoever these people were, they had absolutely no sense of rhythm…

888

"Riley!"

Buffy almost leapt down the ladder to him as he sat in the strange chair, fixed in that strange position. "Riley, it's me! We've got to get going, Adam's already started…"

He looked at her in frustration, but she still didn't comprehend. Then, his eyes widened, and finally getting the message, she turned around.

Maggie Walsh and the other doctor stared back at her, mottled and rotting flesh clashing viciously with their pristine, white labcoats.

Buffy fought the urge to vomit. No-one, no-one should be reduced to this mindless state…

"Riley, Riley, why can't you talk to me?"

"He can't talk to you because he's not programmed to."

Buffy whirled around to face Adam. He was studying her with the irritating half-smile that he always used.

"What, he's programmed so he can be used in your little Final Phase project? Just like I'm supposed to be used? Sorry, I don't take commands from other people. I've never been one to toe the line."

"Oh…" Adam's eyes darkened. "Kill her."

Buffy was about to reply with one of her quips when she felt a strong arm encircle her throat and squeeze. With horror, she recognized Forrest… only he was… barely recognizable. Adam had sewn on the forehead and jaw of a demon, the stitches glaringly obvious, yelling at her that this cursedunion was unnatural. There was a glazed look on his eyes, and she realized that this wasn't Forrest. Just a shell.

"I thought you'd never ask," the Forrest/demon hybrid growled.

As Buffy frantically tried to escape his hold, the two zombies of the Initiative doctors picked up something that vaguely resembled a whirring scalpel, and moved towards her, eyes devoid of emotion. Finally, she managed to utilize her legs, smashing the zombies away and flipping Forrest over onto the table, smashing three glass beakers. With a roar, he threw her, her body landing with a thud on the floor.

Riley felt the chip within him now. Controlling him. But he could… "Buffy!"

Forrest turned, with a mad grin on his face. "Shut up, and watch me kill your girlfriend."

Riley didn't listen to him. He'd seen the beakers smash, and right now, an idea had formed in his head… if only he…

As Buffy, Forrest, and the two doctors fought it out, Riley took a deep breath and plunged the glass shard into his chest.

Forrest sneered as they held her down, the electric wire sparking above then. . "Is that all you got?"

"No!"

Riley stood up and disabled the zombies, pulling the tubes filled with blood out, with a triumphant smile on his face. Blood dribbled down his shirt.

"She's got me!"

"Well, well," Forrest smirked. "Look who's come home to…"

Buffy sent him half-flying across the room, and then turned to her boyfriend. "Riley! I have to get to Adam, like..." she checked her watch. "Now. Are you able?"

"Go," Riley said, wiping a slightly bloodied nose with his sleeve. "I'll hold him off."

And she was gone.

888

With the five candles arrayed in a five pointed star, they began. Blood still dribbled from Spike's side, but it had been staunched somewhat by the thick bandages laid clumsily and quickly over it. He pushed away the aching pain, concentrating on what was happening.

Their faces gleamed in the candlelight. Strange shadows flickered across their features, throwing them into sharp relief. Spike had never really looked properly at the Scoobies before. Of course, he'd observed them. He always had. But never really looked at them.

Willow started, and as soon as she did, a strange force seemed to envelope them.

"Power of the Slayer and all who wield it. Last to ancient First, we invoke thee. Grant us thy domain and primal spirit. Accept us in the power we possess. Keep us mind and spirit joined, let the hand encompass us, do thy will…"

Willow paused, and then handed them their respective cards. In a clear voice, she spoke her lines. She seemed eerie in the darkness, Spike thought. So full of power and… and…

"Spiritus, Spirit," she called.

"Animus, heart," Xander intoned softly.

"Surufus, mind," Giles incanted.

"Arrakis, blood," Spike whispered.

Willow spoke for Buffy, placing the final card down as an ominous wave of foreboding swept over them.

"And Amanas, the hand."

888

Adam smiled, watching all of the mayhem he had caused. The violence that was playing out on the scream appealed to his demon part. Fed it. His human and mechanical side watched, detached. Everything had come into fruition…

"Fun isn't it?"

Adam turned around sharply, his face relaxing as he saw the tiny blonde slayer leaning on the doorframe. He grinned, this time, cruelty lacing through it. "I do appreciate violence."

Buffy smiled; a deadly smile. "Good."

With that, she launched herself at him, giving it all she had. After a few vicious backhands, however, he merely threw her backwards. She crashed into the wall with a thud, her breath knocked out of her. The spike came out of his arm as he thrust it forwards, but she twisted gracefully, breaking it against her knee. With a strong right kick, she sent him stumbling backwards slightly as she flipped herself upwards, brandishing the bone spike like a trophy.

"Broke your arm," she grinned,

"Got another," Adam smiled.

Buffy watched in horror as his right arm began whirring and clanking with mechanic energy, extending out into a…

Oh god. Not a machine gun... couldn't it just have been a puny revolver or something? Or better still, just a… something.-

"I've been upgrading."

Buffy leapt towards the only cover that the room offered, behind a stack of computers. Bullets peppered the air around her, only narrowly missing. They never stopped. Gunshot after gunshot in slow motion…

888

"We are joined so that we may inhabit the vessel, the hand…

888

And just as Adam blew apart the stack of computers to leave Buffy open and vulnerable…

888

"We implore thee, admit us to the vessel. Take us NOW!"

_Oh… _

_My… _

_God…_

8 8 8

**(Thanks! Read and Review, everyone. Please!)**


	8. Fused

**Chapter 8: Fused**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters except for Mia, Bryan, Daniel, and Cassandra. Joss Whedon owns all of the others.**

**Rating: PG 13. I promise. At least I'm not planning anything above it. There might be some harsh language, a bit of violence, and a few 'references', but nothing above kissing is going to be described without warning.**

**(Alright! Chapter 8 is here, now. Enjoy! And Review! Please!)**

**8 8 8**

It felt like a river. A river that threatened to overwhelm us. We felt intrinsically aware of everyone's minds. There were currents, layers to us all that we could dive through. We could see through our eyes, and knew at that minute, Adam had just blown away our protection. Surprisingly enough, however, we weren't scared. Raw power surged through us all, combined. We had never felt such strength. And such a perfect fit! The spell had warned that those who were not meant to enjoin would summon disastrous forces that would most likely destroy them. It had been a risk that we'd taken, but now that they had, we realized that we never should have worried. We were like five pieces of a jigsaw puzzle that neatly fitted together.

Time seemed to have frozen in this one second when we all joined. We felt memories sifting past, and out of curiosity, dived through them. To our surprise, images immediately washed over us in a quick succession. We learnt things that we'd never dreamed of. Dark secrets, laughter, and an infinite sadness and happiness…

888

"_Xander!"_

_The eight year old Xander ran laughingly through the house as a similarly small and short Willow pursued him in vain. Jesse just sat on the sidelines and laughed as they ran around in circles. When Willow eventually burst into angry tears, Xander finally relented, and gave her back her doll._

_Willow hugged her Barbie close to her chest. "That was mean!"_

"_But Willow," Xander gasped, out of breath. "It was so funny!"_

"_You're mean," she accused. "I'm not going out with you any more!"_

_Xander's jaw dropped. "But… but…"_

"_No buts," Willow put on her youthful resolve face. "You stole my Barbie!"_

888

"_I'll make her scream for me, Giles. You'll see."_

_The pain that set his body aflame was nothing compared to the agony of his mind. The thought of Buffy… almost like a daughter… succumbing… being broken by that… that…_

"_Fine, if you won't tell me, then I'll just have to…"_

"_No!" Spike "You can't kill him, you stupid wanker. He's the only one who can tell you about the ritual. Leave him alive."_

_Angelus growled. "You're overstepping your bounds, Spike. After all, you're still Special Needs Boy."_

_Spike smirked. "But I'm right, and you know it. Leave the Watcher alive. Can't get information out of a dead body."_

_Giles' head sunk as exhaustion and agony washed over him. He was in the grip of three Master vampires, all cruel, and in their own ways, insane. There was no hope for him. He only hoped that Buffy would stop this…_

_But before he completely fell unconscious, Spike caught his eyes. And to Giles' surprise, there was something in there. Not compassion. A demon couldn't possibly be capable of compassion, could he? Just recognition, and a small hint of hope._

_It was one of the only things that got Giles through the rest of that time._

888

_It had hurt. Every second of it had hurt her, leaving scars so deep that even she couldn't see them. But they were there, because she could feel them._

_Deep. Throbbing. Painful. Forever._

_Seeing that beloved face looking back at her, a face that she loved with all of her naiveté and youth and innocence twisted with mocking laughter had hit her so hard she almost hadn't recovered. The months of constant fear had gradually worn down the barriers she had put up of denial. Denial had always been her number one defence mechanism. Denial that this… monster in front of her was really her Angel. Denial that Angelus and Angel were one and the same. Denial of the fact that she still loved Angel. Separating the two in her mind as different entities. Waiting for Angel to come back. Just wishing it was all a dream._

_And then the taunts came. The taunts, and Jenny Calendar's death. Giles' subsequent almost-death as he sought revenge. The sheer terror that had shorn into her heart at the thought of losing her watcher, tempered by the hatred and utter loathing she now bore towards Angelus. And yet always separating the two in her mind. She still loved Angel, she would always love Angel… she could love Angel and hate Angelus at the same time… couldn't she?_

_And then he was back._

_The sweet, beloved face of Angel. Wisdom incarnate. Worrying, protective, brooding. Her Angel. And the mouth of Hell gaped behind him._

_The instant that she shoved the sword into his gut broke her, and she had known it. Angel's face contorting now in pain, betrayal, and surprise. It had hit her time and time again, harder than any blow any other demon could inflict._

_Had to run away… run away…_

_From the harshness of her job that made her have to sacrifice everyone she loved._

888

_The yelling above was so loud. So loud… even the bottles crashing against the walls couldn't compete. Xander sat silently in his bed, trying to drown the screaming out with anything. Star Trek discs lay discarded where he'd half thrown them in disgust at their uselessness to get his mind off what was happening upstairs. The computer was still blinking sleepily, but he'd long since turned the monitor off. Behind his dopey façade, Xander was an avid chess player. But now, even chess couldn't take him away from what was happening._

_And so, cross-legged he sat still, as if his silence alone could somehow drown out the voices above. A smile sadly danced across his face as he remembered better times. He travelled through his memories, sifting each one with infinite care._

_Then one hit him._

_Jesse._

_It was this, and not his parents, that forced him to roll over and be sick all over the basement floor. And then sit, crying, until the voices died away, and he was left with only his memories, and empty platitudes that echoed around him like he was in a wind tunnel._

888

_"Lu-mi-nous... no, no, uh, irra-di-ant... wait, that's better…"_

_William sat on the couch, chewing his pen. Glasses perched precariously on his nose as he gazed down at the paper, wondering. Soft brown curls partially impeded his sight, and he pushed them away impatiently, still deep in thought._

"_Sir?"_

_A Butler held out a tray of hors d'oevres, and his question stirred William from his reverie._

"_Quickly," William smiled eagerly at the confused man. "I'm the very spirit of vexation. What's another word for "illuminate?" It's perfectly perfect as many words go but the bother is nothing rhymes, you see…"_

_Obviously perplexed, the butler merely forced a smile, bowed, and moved off into the crowd to find someone else to serve. Slightly miffed at his inability to find a fitting word, William stared through the crowd, looking for inspiration._

_He quickly found it when the object of his infatuation descended regally down the stairs, surrounded by a gaggle of dashing male suitors. William swallowed, transfixed, and then eagerly began to write. Quietly, he whispered one word under his breath as he wrote feverishly. "Cecily."_

_When he finished, William stood and tried to push his way through the crowd to where she was standing, almost glowing in what he believed to be her almost dark and glowing beauty. As he neared, he heard snatches of their conversation._

"_I've heard on good authority they're not human at all. Animals of some sort. Escaped from a travelling sideshow," declared a foppish young gentleman._

"_But wild animals would leave a trace of some kind. Tracks..." suggested his lady. She hung onto his arm like her life depended on it._

"_Mangled bodies, indeed."_

"_Charles! Don't be ghastly."_

"_I merely point out that it's something of a mystery, and the police should keep an open mind…"_

_The crowd finally noticed him as he tried to enter their circle. Raoul Evans attempted a benign smile. "Ah, William. Favor us with your opinion. What do you make of this rash of disappearances sweeping our town? Animals or thieves?"_

_Caught unawares, William let the words spill out of his mouth "I prefer not to think of such dark, ugly business at all. That's what police are for." He eyed Cecily shyly. She averted her gaze._

_Could she be flirting?_

_William stared at her for another moment, feeling his heart leap in his chest, before continuing. "I prefer placing my energies into creating things of beauty."_

_At that, Raoul showed his true smile, maliciousness tainting his handsome features. "I see. Well. Don't withhold, William."_

_He snatched the paper from William's hand. The others, clearly looking to join in the fun, plastered on their own fake smiles._

"_Please do. Rescue us from a dreary topic."_

_In a panic, William almost dropped his glasses. "Careful!" He cried, almost standing up for himself. But one glare from Raoul under heavy lidded eyes was enough to make him back down. Half contritely, he looked around for an excuse. " The ink's still wet. Please, it's not finished..."_

"_Oh, don't be shy, William. Let's see…" he cleared his voice. Quickly, he scanned it, smiling again as he chose what he deemed to be the part most able to make William squirm._

"_Descending from yonder stair she comes,_

_My heart expands,  
'tis grown a bulge in't,  
inspired by your beauty,_

_Effulgent…"_

_Raoul broke off with a roar of laughter. "Effulgent? Well, William! Your vocabulary is certainly improving!"_

_There was a beat, and then everyone else joined in the mocking laughter. William felt his face almost physically crumble. Cecily, embarrassed, pulled away from the crowd to walk to a quiet place. William followed her hopefully, but still hearing each word spoken behind him._

"_And that's actually one of his better compositions," Raoul mocked._

"_Have you heard, they call him "William the Bloody" because of his bloody awful poetry!" the lady laughed brightly. The play on words seemed to delight her._

"_It suits him," her partner snorted arrogantly. "I'd rather have a railroad spike through my head than listen to that awful stuff..."_

_Trying to ignore their drifting voices, William followed the object of his infatuation to a small room adjoining the main one. She sat on a small couch, looking rather bewildered. Crushed by the expression on her face, William moved closer to comfort her._

"_Cecily..."_

_She looked up, but when she saw who it was, she angrily looked down again. "Leave me alone."_

_Undeterred, William continued, fumbling. "They're vulgarians," he comforted her. "Can't you see? They're not like you and I."_

"_You and I?" She turned to face him directly. He swallowed at the sight of her beauty. For one second they were close. Intimate._

"_William, I'm going to ask you a very personal question, and I demand an honest answer. Do you understand?"_

_He nodded, his heart in his throat at her words._

_Cecily took a deep breath, and then began to speak in a rush. "Your poetry. It's… they're not… written about me... Are they?"_

_Still affected by their proximity, William groped for suitable words. "They're about how I feel," he answered, lamely._

"_Yes," Cecily said impatiently. "But are they about me?"_

_William hesitated for a moment, and then lay his aching, beating heart out in front of her. "Every syllable," he whispered._

"_Oh, God..." Cecily turned away from him. William scooted around to face her, making a desperate, impassioned plea:_

"_I know... This is sudden. And - and, please, if they're no good, they're only words. But the feeling behind them... I love you, Cecily…"_

_She shook her head mutely, and interrupted him. "Please stop…" she said faintly._

_He plunged on, regardless. "I know I'm a bad poet. But I'm a good man. All I ask is that you try to see me..."_

"_I do see you," she murmurs, and he held his breath with the sudden hope that flooded through him. All to be crushed by her next words._

"_That's the problem. You're nothing to me, William…"_

_She paused, and then continued. Truth flashed in her eyes._

"_You're beneath me."_

888

_Without his hat and coat, William tore down the street. Hot tears streaked down his face as he went, each step only accentuating the blind pain and agony in his heart. He ripped up his poem with each shuddering step, bumping into a group of three people as he went. In the midst of his pain, he threw away his English manners._

"_Bloody... watch where you're going!"_

_He continued down the street, ripping up the paper into smaller and smaller bits. Already damp from his tears, they shredded easily under his raging hands. Then suddenly, his feet stopped. Slowly, the rage drained out of him, and he slumped against a wall._

_A soothing, understanding voice came from nowhere:_

"_And here I wonder... what possible catastrophe came crashing down from heaven and brought this dashing stranger..."_

_The strange woman reached out, gingerly wiped away the last remaining tear from his face, and stared at him in understanding. "...to tears?_

_He swallowed. Several times. She was… beautiful. It was one of the first times any beautiful woman had ever paid any attention to him that wasn't mocking or derogatory. Finding his voice, he stammered out the only answer he could think of. "N… nothing. I wish to be alone."_

_She shook her head gently at his words, laughing softly. "You've been alone too long."_

"_What could you possibly know of me?" William asked in disbelief._

"_I've seen you," she replied, her pupils dilating. "A man surrounded by fools who cannot see his strength. His vision. His glory. That, and burning baby fish swimming all 'round your head."_

_She stepped closer to him, even as he backed away, suspicion cloaking him. "Th-that's quite close enough," he told her. "I've heard tales of London pickpockets. You'll not get my purse, I tell you."_

_She chuckled lightly. "Don't need a purse. Your wealth lies here…" She touched his heart with slim fingers. "And here." She brushed her tips against his head. He shuddered as she continued. "In the spirit and imagination. You walk in worlds the others can't begin to imagine…"_

_He was gone, now. Hypnotized. How could she know these things, he wondered. She stepped even closer, invading his personal space. "Yes... I mean, no. I mean… Mother's expecting me," he muttered incoherently._

_She ignored him, leaning closer, whispering in his ear. "I see what you want," she tantalized. "Something glowing, and glistening. Something effulgent. Do you want it?"_

_She guided his limp hand to her chest, and his eyes widened as he felt the distinct lack of heartbeat. Without thought, he spoke the words that would seal his fate.  
"I - yes! God, yes!"_

_She smiled. As she vamp-faced, and bit deep into his neck, he felt a million feelings running through him, culminating in…_

_Pain._

_Pain._

_Shooting, utter, pain._

"_Ow. Ow! OW! Ow ow ow ow OW-WOO!"_

888

We saw all this, and more. We gasped in astonishment, but then the waves of wonder subsided. Of course we knew this. We had always known. We just grasped it when we joined. Caught the eluding feelings that had swum deep inside us. We knew of our childhood. We knew of our loves. We loved Anya, Angel, Jenny Calendar, Oz, Tara, Buffy, Willow, Xander, Giles, and Spike. We loved, and it was irrefutable. We loved together. Intense. A flame. Drawing strength. Combining as we merged into the One. Forging an unbreakable bond between us as raw power rushed through conduits we never knew had existed.

All of this in a second.

Yet there was something to be done. Revelling in our joint power, we swam into reality, just as Adam pulled the trigger and hit the barrier we had erected…

888

"You can't last much longer," Adam sneered.

"We can," we stated calmly in our joined voices. They fitted perfectly. Like a harmony. "We are forever."

He merely smiled, and then fired at us. They hit an invisible energy shield that we had erected.

"Interesting…" he frowned slightly, and then fired again. This time, we merely changed the bullets into doves. It was a nice touch.

"_Very _interesting…" he grated out.

We now moved with a confidence none of us had ever felt. With a wave of our hand, his gun retreated back into his mechanical arm. We saw his confusion. Felt it. Felt anger and uncertainty as he stalked towards us.

We knew we could take him.

Easily.

We walked, no, glided towards him, each step radiating with our power. He swung at us as if in slow motion, and we easily evaded him. Then, we sprang into action. Each punch and kick we threw was timed perfectly. We had never felt this strength before. Not even when we were Called, or when we became a Vampire. Not even when we began learning magic or had become possessed by the spirit of a hyena. We dodged, twisted, and attacked with such wonderful grace, it was unbelievable. We quickly backed him against the wall, hitting him again and again. We saw his surprise as we threw him on the floor and advanced.

"But how can you…?" he gasped in surprise as we spin-kicked him into the wall, and held him.

"You will never know the source of our power," we chanted in unison.

And then we thrust our arm deep into him, and closed our fingers around his uranium-cortex, and yanked it out. He slumped to the floor.

"But yours," we whispered as we held it in our hands, "is right here."

"Buffy," we heard Riley call us, but we ignored him. He wasn't a part of this… besides, we still had one thing left to do.

"Amien den, coloura den, amien hular antruen den…"

Propelled by our magic, the uranium-cortex flew into the air, before coalescing power destroyed it utterly. We stood there looking at the space it had just vacated, revelling in our combined power.

"Buffy?" Riley asked again.

Then we ended the spell. Each fibre of our being screamed to stay united in this way, in this perfect fit. Love, acceptance, strength, power, understanding… we weren't separate. We were one. Bound together for an eternity. It took an enormous amount of willpower to separate ourselves, and when we did, we all fell, gasping, into our respective bodies.

But not without something remaining within us.

We could feel it, just before we split apart. The potential. The bonds that had already formed, and only needed to be joined again.

And we exulted.

Because we knew we could get back to completion.

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

As Buffy fell into Riley's arms, Spike, Willow, Giles, and Xander collapsed with a sigh, the candles illuminating their exhausted features. They were open, helpless.

_Prey…_

A demon that had been crashing against the door for the last minute finally burst through, and launched itself at them with a primitive bellow. Exhausted as they were, they knew they could barely move, let alone defend themselves. In the split second they had, they readied themselves to die…

But then a blinding flash of light shone incandescent against the darkness of the room. They flung their hands against their faces to shield themselves against that beautiful light, even though part of them yearned to drink it in. The demon howled pitifully, backing away, but then the light vanished as quickly as it had come, leaving in its place two people.

They watched in awe as the two shook themselves, took in their surroundings with surprise, and then realized what was standing in front of them. Realization took them, and as the demon rushed towards them, one stuck out a crutch. It fell with a thump to the floor, and before it could get up, the other delivered a punishing blow with an unused chair.

They looked at each other in fear.

"_Now_ what?"

The demon was already beginning to stir, and in the compromising position the one with the crutches was in, he fell on top of it. It bucked him off, stood again, and threw him against the room. The other moved in as well as she could, but it merely batted her away like an insect. Looking around the room, it decided which of its six possible victims it should go for first, and decided on the crumpled body lying against the wall. Looking rather defenceless.

The steel tip of the crutch batted ineffectively at the demon as it ran, but he managed to crawl out of the way. Luckily for him, this demon was more muscles than agility. Again, it tripped over the crutch. But that was all he could do midst his pain. He slumped, exhausted, as the beast started to rise again.

But in the time that they had bought, Spike had recovered enough to close his hanging jaw and leap on the demon's back. With a swift crack, he broke its neck.

And then, looking at the two new appearances, he voiced what everyone else was thinking.

"Who the _hell_ are you?"

8 8 8

**(Hope you enjoyed. Please, R&R!)**


	9. The Bloody Awful Aftermath

**Chapter 9: The Bloody Awful Aftermath**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters except for Mia, Bryan, Daniel, and Cassandra. Joss Whedon owns all of the others.**

**Rating: PG 13. I promise. At least I'm not planning anything above it. There might be some harsh language, a bit of violence, and a few 'references', but nothing above kissing is going to be described without warning.**

**A/N (Alright! Chapter 9 is here, now. See? I was so happy that I got my fourth review (4 is my lucky number. And by the way, thanks to all of you!) that I decided to post this already written part, doing in the 'update once a week' rule! So there! Review, and I post quicker! I know it's short… but…)**

**8 8 8**

"The Initiative represented the government's interest in not only controlling the otherworldly menace, but harnessing it to our own uses for the military. Once the prototype took control of the centre, however, it led to a 40 mortality rate. It was only through the work of a group of civilian insurgents, a deserter, and most surprisingly, a HST itself, that our losses were not total.

I trust you appreciate the irony of that, gentleman. They have taken the formal procedures of secrecy, and if they come out, we are prepared to put all legal power upon them, but somehow, I don't think they will.

Maggie Walsh's dream was brilliant, but in the end, unconceivable. Demons cannot be controlled. They cannot be contained. So burn it down, gentleman. Burn it down, and purge the earth of its sins."

888

"Ow!" Xander yelped, hopping on one leg as Buffy stared on with grim satisfaction. "That hurt!"

"That was for lying to me about that time with Willow and Angel," Buffy said, a steely note in her voice.

"What?" Willow demanded. She rounded on Xander, eyebrows raised. "What's she talking about?"

Buffy glared at him. "He lied to me. You told him to tell me that you were going to restore Angel's soul two years ago, and he just told me to kick his ass."

"_What!_"

"Ow!" Xander yelped again, his bruised leg throbbing. "Okay, can you cut it out with the shin-kicking? I'm sorry!"

"And Willow! Were you… I mean, I know that you said you were scared about telling us about Tara, but…" Buffy gulped. "You were really that scared?"

"Of course I was!" Willow exclaimed. "I… I didn't want you all to be looking at me in disgust. I've met homophobes before and… it's just…"

"Hey, Willow. Maybe you're not homosexual, maybe you're just bi," Xander said cheerfully.

"Maybe," Willow smiled thoughtfully. "But if I was, during the enjoining spell, wouldn't you have seen it?"

"This is… this is fascinating!" Giles finally managed to get the sentence out of his mouth. The Watcher's face was lined with joy. "All this… Research! How did we see all that we saw? Why didn't we see some things? Why…"

They spoke in unison, and Buffy wondered idly if it was an after-effect of the spell.

"Why did we see Spike like that?"

"Talking about me?" Spike asked quietly from behind them.

They jumped as they saw the vampire leaning against the wall. Before they could say anything, he began ticking things off on his fingers.

"Captain Cardboard's got the wounded soldiers under control, sent 'em to the hospital. He told me to tell you lot that he's going to go straight to the Government. Hopes he can get out with a honourable discharge. The girl and the boy are in hospital too. Still unconscious. Adam's dead. And an evil soulless thing like me should be getting back to his crypt. Right… uh… that's it. I'm gone."

As he moved to slip out of the door, he was yanked back by Buffy. She resisted the urge to slam him against the wall, and instead, steered him back into the living room.

"You're going to answer a few questions, Spike," Buffy tried hard not to let her voice be shaky. "And one of them is _definitely_ going to be how you lied to us when we were enjoined."

"What the hell are you going on about, Slayer!" Spike demanded.

"Talk, Spike," Giles agreed, seating himself on the armchair. "I don't understand either. The memories of us, they were all real. But yours? How did you fabricate them?"

As always, when Spike chose to let his emotions show, they were stunning indeed. First, confusion raced over his handsome features, then understanding, bewilderment, anger, hopelessness and finally, exhaustion ran over him in quick succession. He threw Buffy's hand off him, knowing that doing so wouldn't hurt her.

"You want to know?" he demanded harshly, glaring at all of the Scoobies. Willow and Xander stepped backwards, towards Giles on his chair, and even Buffy was tempted to retreat from whoever this new person was. In an effort to cover her… fear? she stood next to Giles. The four of them were arrayed in a semi-circle facing… This wasn't Spike. Spike was cocky, arrogant, deadly, and beautiful…

Okay, where had she gotten 'beautiful' from?-

"You want to know?" he repeated again, pushing back the hysterical laughter. "Oh, all right then."

He stalked towards Giles, and his demeanour was cloaked with such anger and violence that the staid Watcher almost shrunk back. He did at Spike's words. "Take this down for your books, _Rupert_," Spike sneered, his face full of crashing pain. "All those memories, every single bloody one of 'em that you saw was real."

Reaching out two hands then, he pressed his right palm on Buffy's forehead, and his left on Giles'. Knowing that they all had to touch, Spike used his left foot to stand on Xander's bare feet, and his right on Willow's. They all gasped in unison.

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

"Daniel?"

"Yeah?"

"You awake?"

"Yeah. Why?"

"Have you noticed something?"

"What?"

"We're healed."

"Really?"

There was a silence. Then…

"That's all you can say!"

"Well, I could go on about how weird this is. Where are we, by the way?"

"I'm not entirely sure… but I think it's the Sunnydale Hospital."

There was a beat, and then the two of the crept out of the hospital bed in unison and stared at each other.

"Where's Sunnydale?" Daniel asked.

"UC California…" Cassandra answered. "And… um… I think I know what that guy was talking about."

"UC California?" Daniel shook his head, trying to process the information. "How did we get from Australia to America?"

"That's the thing. We're in a different dimension. That's what the guy was on about."

"Dimension? Hang on a sec…" Daniel laughed. "You don't _really_ believe in that kind of stuff, do you?"

Cassandra raised her eyebrow. "I'd say that believing in things like magic and demons is a bit of a moot point considering what we saw."

"Good point," Daniel winced.

They stood in silence for a while, and then Daniel spoke up again.

"We're in shock, aren't we?"

"Yeah."

"From that thing we saw… right? It… it… it put us in shock."

"Yeah, why?"

"Have you noticed something?"

"What?"

"Sunnydale… I thought you would have noticed it first. We're in… we're in that T.V series you always rant on about!"

Cassandra blinked innocently. "Really?"

There was a silence. Then…

"That's all you can say!"

The two stared at each other again the half-darkness, laughed hysterically for a time, and then sobered.

"Oh God."

"Yeah, well… I'm not sure if he's going to listen to us. Considering I think his lackeys put us here in the first place."

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

They snapped out of it together with a gasp, furious emotions still pounding through their veins. Spike leapt backwards, breaking the contact, even though something in all of them screamed to keep it maintained. As he let go, his previous fatigue enveloped him again.

Facing the shocked assemblage, the deathly silence encompassing them all, he felt the exhaustion finally claim him as he fell to it. He spun around back to Buffy, and she saw the fatigue hooding his sunken eyes.

"So, now that you know the sodding truth about William the Bloody Awful poet, I'm leaving. No more questions. I'm tired, confused, and bloody exhausted, got it?"

Buffy nodded softly. "Got it."

Surprised at her quiet acceptance, Spike stared at them all one last time, before disappearing with a swirl of his leather duster. Leaving them all gaping behind him.

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

_I really can't explain what that day was like. Bloody impossible, it was. The Bloody Awful Aftermath._

_Hmmph._

_The thing is that we later found out that the memories we first shared with each other were ones we'd repressed. Don't ask me why Red repressed that memory of her and the Whelp, but yeah. We'd hidden those memories even from ourselves. I, for one, had buried William the sodding Bloody Awful Poet so deep that I'd almost forgotten him. I'd locked him in a bloody cellar, tossed away the key, and muttered 'Good Riddance'. Despite all of this, that one spell just unlocked all of the doors again._

_Now can you understand my reaction of that day?_

_But it wasn't only that. I needed to feel them again. We were brilliant, together. Fit like a jigsaw puzzle, just like you and your fancy words said. Most importantly, I felt accepted. You have no idea how much that meant to me._

_Oh, you do, do you? Like hell you do. You've never been in one of those enjoining spells._

_Oi, what's with that look? You mean you have? But… but… they're volatile! They could have killed you, you silly…_

_Oh, right. I'm supposed to be talking about that day. Well, fine. I overreacted. The Scoobies and the Slayer were just the last straw, that's all. I was still struggling with all of those memories, and then they had to come out and accuse me of lying. At the time, I bloody well wished that that's what they were! Just… lies._

_It would have made things a lot simpler._

_But no… things can never be simple around the Hellmouth. Most importantly, things can never be simple around the Slayer and her Scoobies. But just the way they looked at me… I couldn't stand it. I had to show them. And so I did._

_When we joined, I felt like we were complete again, and I know for sure the others did as well. Wasn't really that hard. I could kind of feel them as well, you know. That enjoining spell… I don't think many people have tried it before us. They knew the thing was dangerous. And many of those evil guys never wanted that kind of connection with anyone else. Always wanted to stand alone. And the good guys probably never thought of using this kind of magic. It's not black magic, no… it's just volatile magic, that's all. Probably thought the risks outweighed the benefits._

_Now that I think of it, it was probably that spell that changed everything. No, scrap that. I'm willing to point the finger and declare the soddin' Powers that Be started it all. Manipulated us into using that spell just so that everything would change. I guess we have to thank them, though. Right? I mean, otherwise things would never have happened this way._

_Yeah, so what if I'm being sarcastic!_

_So, yeah. That was it. The Bloody Awful Aftermath. Just because I was still bloody tired, damned well confused from all of those memories, and really, really… I don't know…_

_Vulnerable? You think I was vulnerable!_

_Alright, fine. Have it your way. I was vulnerable. Come on, the good old Big Bad image that had lasted me for over a hundred years had just been shattered. Wouldn't you have felt a little vulnerable?_

_In any case, the exhaustion was what did us in afterwards._

_That was when **she** came._

8 8 8

**(Please, Reviews!)**


	10. Restless : Part I

**Chapter 10 **

**Restless: Part I **

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters except for Mia, Bryan, Daniel, and Cassandra. Joss Whedon owns all of the others.**

**Rating: PG 13. I promise. At least I'm not planning anything above it. There might be some harsh language, a bit of violence, and a few 'references', but nothing above kissing is going to be described without warning.**

**A/N(How am I going for time? As promised, when you review, I post quicker. Not sure if I can keep this speed up though… heh. But thankyou so much to my reviewers! I'm glad you like the story so far. I hope I've addressed any issues that you have with my story. If not, inform me, please! So… because of my kind reviewers, Chapter 10 is here, now. Well… Part I of it. Part II and III will be up soon, Promise! For now… enjoy! And Review! Please!)**

8 8 8

Tara was lying on her stomach, resting her chin on crossed arms. Willow smiled from behind her. The air itself seemed to sing with contentment, and the warm feeling of protection and care. Love seemed to sing from every square inch of the two as they smiled at each other adoringly. Relaxed.

"I think it's strange," the golden-blonde witch commented softly. "I mean, I think I should worry that we haven't found her name."

Willow stopped her delicate work and frowned. "Who, Miss Kitty?"

"You'd think she'd let us know her name by now."

"She will," Willow replied confidently. "She's not all grown yet."

"You're not worried?" Tara inquired curiously.

"I never worry here," Willow whispered. "I'm safe here."

As she said so, she resumed painting the Greek symbols once more. They flowed from underneath her brush like silk.

"You don't know everything about me." Tara replied.

"Have you told me your real name?" Willow asked.

"Oh, you know that," Tara smiled.

They paused, and Willow dipped the brush into the ink jar again and resumed painting on Tara's naked back. The blonde witch sighed and relaxed as the love poem curled across her skin, speaking so eloquently what the two felt. After a moment, she looked up at Willow again, earnestly.

"They will find out, you know," she murmured quietly. "About you."

Willow frowned, lines of worry crossing her forehead. "Don't have time to think about that. You know I have all this homework to finish."

"Are you going to finish in time for class?" Tara asked.

"I can be late," Willow shrugged.

"But you've never taken drama before… might miss something important," Tara worried.

Willow merely smiled. "I don't wanna leave here."

Tara smiled even gentler this time, if it were possible. "I know, but you have to."

Willow didn't hear her…

"Well, you must have done something," Buffy frowned in disapproval.

"No," Willow stammered. "I never do anything. I'm very seldom naughty. I, I just came to class, and, and the play was starting…"

Nervousness swamped her. Buffy never acted like this… she knew she didn't. Buffy never blamed anyone except for herself. It was something Willow worried about, but at the moment, she was so confused she didn't know what to think. Adrenaline still pumped through her from whoever… whatever had tried to kill her.

Buffy straightened up. "Play is long over. Why are you still in costume?"

"Okay, still having to explain wherein this is just my outfit," Willow gestured to her clothes.

Buffy rolled her eyes. "Willow, everybody already knows. Take it off."

Willow looked around, bewildered. Afraid. "No. No. I _need_ it."

Buffy rolled her eyes again. "Oh, for god's sake, just take it off!" she spun Willow around and ripped her clothes off.

Suddenly the entire classroom was filled.And the entire class was laughing.

"See?" Harmony giggled. "Isn't everybody very clear on this now?"

Willow felt lost. Broken. Instinctively she knew that they were laughing about her, and instinctively, she clammed up. Retreating into herself. It didn't stop the words, however.

"My god, it's like a tragedy," Anya sniggered.

Oz whispered something to Tara. "I tried to warn you," he gave Willow a disgusted look.

One look from those eyes still stopped her heart. But this one? It shattered her.

Anya was still giggling. "It's exactly like a Greek tragedy. There should only be Greeks."

Despite her confusion and hurt,Willow knew she had to keep going. Shelooked around nervously, feeling her throat dry up as she found no friendly faces. "My book report. This summer I, I read "The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe." "

Xander leaned back in his chair to glance up at the ceiling. "Oh, who _cares_?"

Oz nuzzled Tara's cheek while she giggled. Desperately, Willow tried to go on. Xander's words echoed in her mind.

"This book ha-has many themes..."

But it was for naught. Something burst into the room and knocked Willow down, screaming. Growls and shrieks filled the air, but no-one helped.

"Help! Help me!" Willow cried desperately. _"Help me!"_

But no one did.

Willow's eyes widened. Then the skin on her face wrinkled and dried, and her eyes slid shut.

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

"Where are you from, Harris?"

The voice was breathy, almost sibilant in its tone. Xander, still kneeling on cold stone floor, felt the words come out of his mouth before he even thought.

"Well, the basement, mostly."

"Were you born there?" the sibilant voice asked.

Xander nodded. _-Everything in my life seems to lead to there after all, right?-_"Possibly."

"I walked by your guidance counselor's office one time. A bunch of you were sitting there ... waiting to be shepherded."

As the owner of the voice moved out of the shadows, Xander realized that it was Snyder. Confusion and alarm moved over his face, but Snyder spoke before he could.

"I remember it smelled like dead flowers," Snyder whispered. "Like decay. Then it hit me. The hope of our nation's future is a bunch of _mulch_."

"You know, I never got the chance to tell you how glad I was you were eaten by a snake," Xander informed him, feeling his hatred for his former principal return.Instantly, however, heregretted it._–Oops, shouldn't have said that-_

Snyder ignored the comment and sat up, perusing him intently. "Where are you heading?"

Xander shrugged. "Well, I'm supposed to meet Tara and Willow. And possibly Buffy's mom."

"Your time is running out…"

"No, I'm just trying to get away," Xander explained. A look of fear slowly crossed his face. Something was after him, of that he was sure. And... he wasn't sure if Buffy was going to help him. He wasn't even sure if Buffy was alive. "There's ... something I can't fight."

"Are you a soldier?" Snyder demanded.

Xander shook his head. "I'm a comfortador."

Snyder leaned forward, contempt dripping from his tone. "You're neither," he quietly snarled. "You're a whipping boy. Raised by mongrels and set on a sacrificial stone."

Xander only nodded this time. _-Bullshit... and yetcompletely utterly right.-_"I'm getting a cramp."

The door shook. Louder, more insistently. Feral growls came from behind it. Xander only looked at it, a mixture of fear and resignation coating his voice.

"That's not the way out," he whispered.

"What the hell is wrong with you!"

Xander realized who it was as he saw that all too familiar figure silhouetted in the doorway above. "You won't come upstairs?" his father continued. "What are you ... ashamed of us? Your mother's crying her guts out!"

"You don't understand," Xander said quietly. He felt drained, suddenly. Drained of everything he was. All the life and the jubilance and the pure exuberance sucked away by something he could not name.

"No," his father spat, stomping down the stairs. "_You_ don't understand. The line ends here with us, and you're not gonna change that."

Xander kept his eyes fixed downwards, unable to look into his father's eyes.

"You haven't got the _heart_."

Suddenly, Xander's father shoved his hand into Xander's chest. Xander looked down to see the hand covered with rags. Fear raced across his face as he looked up, and met with wild, feral eyes surrounded by grey skin and dark, stringy hair. The person growled.

The hand pulled Xander's heart straight out of his chest.

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

"I know you," Giles looked into the distance as everything blurred. His voice came out as a whisper, and yet still, it echoed sullenly.

"Hey!"

Giles turned, and saw Spike standing near the edge of his crypt. "Come on!" Spike yelled again, gesturing "You're gonna miss everything!" With that, he turned and entered his home.

Giles entered the crypt bemusedly, noting the candlelight flickering on the walls, throwing into sharp relief Olivia sitting on a coffin next to a baby carriage lying on the side, sobbing.

"Don't push me around," Giles said sharply. "You know I have a great deal to do."

He saw in black and white a group of people with cameras, their attention obviously focused on the blond vampire, who was looking past them at Giles. He smiled cheerfully. "I've hired myself out as an attraction," he grinned, striking a threatening pose. The people oohed and aahed, the cameras flashing.

Dimly, Giles could still hear Olivia crying in the background. "What, Sideshow freak?" he asked snidely.

Spike flipped up the collar of his coat, an aura of menace descending palpably on him. "Well, at least it's showbiz," he shrugged as the crowd voiced their appreciation again. The flashes danced their way across his sculptured cheekbones, flashing against cerulean blue eyes that held amazing power.

Giles moved forward, bewilderment crossing his face as he looked between Spike and Olivia. "What am I supposed to do with all of this?"

"You gotta make up your mind, Rupes," the vampire explained. "What are you wasting your time for?"

He posed again, and more cameras flashed, blinding Giles' sensitive vision. "Haven't you figured it all out yet, with your enormous squishy frontal lobes?" he posed yet again.

Giles walked across the crypt. "I still think Buffy should have killed you."

He watched in satisfaction as annoyance crossed the vampire's face, and then headed out of the crypt, the sound of the cameras snapping merrily away behind him.

There was a sudden loud feedback as the microphone died and the band stopped playing. The last strands of music faded away, and confused, Giles got down on his knees and started following the microphone cord backstage. Carefully, he traced it to a large heap of tangled cord. Ferreting around in it, he pulled out his pocket watch on its chain, the shadows dancing across its metal as the hands ticked.

"Well, that was ... obvious," muttered Giles.

The dark-haired creature who had been stalking them all was suddenly illuminated by a flash of lightning, a weapon in its hand.

Giles gasped. "I know who you are."

It crept closer…

"And I can defeat you ... with my intellect. I ... can cripple you with my thoughts…"

The creature grabbed his hair and put the weapon against his forehead, and slowly started scalping him.

"Of course, you underestimate me. You couldn't know…"

Blood slowly ran down Giles' face, dripping from his forehead and staining his glasses.

"You never had a Watcher…"

8 8 8

**(Please! Read and Review, everyone!)**


	11. Restless : Part II

**Chapter 10**

**Restless: Part II**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters except for Mia, Bryan, Daniel, and Cassandra. Joss Whedon owns all of the others.**

**Rating: PG 13. I promise. At least I'm not planning anything above it. There might be some harsh language, a bit of violence, and a few 'references', but nothing above kissing is going to be described without warning.**

**A/N (Alright! Chapter 10 is here, now. Well, Part 2 of it, anyway. Hope you liked Part 1! Enjoy! And Review! Please!)**

**(Oh, and Spike's Sweet Love? I'm going to try : ). The main point of this fic, however, is to slowly bring Buffy and Spike together, so we don't get a replay of Season 6.**

**After Restless is over, though… )**

**8 8 8**

Spike awoke with a jerk, sensing himself in the darkness of his crypt. It was cold… so cold… the candle flames seemed to dance around him in a mockery of a snowstorm, their flames pale blue.

"Cold?" he wondered aloud. "Since… when did I feel cold?"

_A hundred years ago and counting._

Rolling out of bed, he slung on a shirt to cover his upper half. "Funny, slept with my jeans on, and upstairs, too," he mused. "Don't usually do that. In fact, I could swear that I didn't… Bugger all…"

There was a growl as the crypt door banged, interrupting him as he wondered aloud. Instantly, he shifted himself into fighting position. Whereas before he'd been languid, almost like a cat stretching after a long resting nap, now he was tense and coiled, prepared to quickly spring into action. Too many demons had burst in from there lately, accusing him of siding with the Slayer. Whoever it was would be dead very soon…

As the stone door clanged again, however, Spike felt an unreasoning wave of fear wash over him.

"I can't go there…"

He turned to move down the ladder towards the lower level. The rungs seemed slippery under his fingers, and he couldn't pinpoint why. Usually, everything was cold and dry, in his crypt. And why couldn't he see the candlelight flickering? Why were there more shadows than ever before?

As he reached the middle rungs, he felt the atmosphere around him seem to shift. Frowning, he jumped down the last four rungs, and when he alighted, he found himself staring at a very familiar living room.

Shock stilled his tongue for a second, before his reflexes kicked in. "What the soddin' hell!"

He looked around, feeling a sense of unnaturalness seep into his very skin. The ladder had disappeared. Irrationally, he grasped at thin air and came away with nothing. A voice broke into his thoughts.

"William? Where were you? Oh, I've been so worried…"

"Mother?"

Disbelievingly, Spike slowly turned to greet the woman approaching. Tentatively, he touched her… heard her heartbeat under his fingertips. Smelt the blood rushing through her. A sudden joy lit his pale features, and he caught her in his arms. Without noticing it, one hundred years melted off his face. "Mother, you're alive!"

"Why, of course I am," she smiled, slightly puzzled. "Sit with me?"

He led her gallantly to the chair, where he curled up against her again as she knitted, touching her as if he couldn't believe what was happening. He couldn't. He could still feel a tingling at the back of his neck that warned him that this was completely unnatural…

Suddenly, a coughing fit wracked her. Spike sat up, alarmed, and immediately fetched a glass of water for her. Blood speckled her handkerchief when she brought it away from her mouth.

"Mother, should I call a doctor?"

She shook her head. "It's passed, don't worry. Come, sit by me again."

He looked at her resolute face, sighed, and then sat next to her again, leaning back into the couch. His eyes closed as she began singing. This was so familiar… so familiar it hurt. And yet, it stirred in him a vestige of fear, and he had no idea why.

"Early one morning, just as the sun was rising,

I heard a maid sing in the valley below.

"Oh, don't deceive me, oh, never leave me,

How could you use a poor maiden so?""

"That was beautiful, mother," Spike murmured softly after the last strains had melted into the air. "Like always."

"You really think so?" she asked girlishly. He patted her hand, and then realized something suddenly. He could no longer hear her heartbeat, and the skin beneath his own was cold. The whispers of fear and unease turned into full-throated roar, and he almost let it escape.

Instead, he leapt up. "M-m… mother?"

" 'The lark hath spake from twixt its wee beak?' You honestly thought I could bear an eternity listening to that twaddle?" she demanded mockingly. Each word crushed him. He stared, dumbfounded. This wonderful dream had turned into a cruel nightmare… one that had haunted him until he pushed the memory into the depths of his mind.

She continued talking. "I feel extraordinary. It's as though I've been given new eyes. I see everything. Understand..." she looked at him and frowned, "Everything."

He backed away, disturbed, knowing and dreading what was to come. The feeling of unnaturalness increased. "Mother..."

"I hate to be cruel," she sighed, before frowning again. "No, I don't. I used to hate to be cruel in life. Now, I find it rather freeing. Nothing less will pry your greedy little fingers off my apron strings, will it?"

Spike looked away, feeling tears begin to pool at the edges of his eyes. Helplessness washed over him. "Stop. Please," he begged softly.

She ignored him, walking closer. Brushing him with her scent. "Ever since the day you first slithered from me like a parasite..."

He felt his undead heart clench, and the tears coalesced into a shimmering mirror against his will. "What… what are you saying…?"

"Had I known better, I could have spared myself a lifetime of tedium and just…" she sighed melodramatically, her voice hardening with a growl. "Dashed your brains out when I first saw you."

She turned away from him, malice and hatred still tainting her voice. "God, I prayed you'd find a woman to release me, but you scarcely showed an interest. Who could compare to your doddering housebound mum? A captive audience for your witless prattle."

Each word was a weapon. A weapon meant to hurt. Suddenly, he felt aware of everything. Every single detail of the horror leapt into focus. His mother's hair falling down in the waves he knew so well from his childhood. The fury and violence of the demon behind the human mask. Her scent. The scent he knew so well. That spoke of comfort and nursery songs and love, but now smelt of death.

And most of all, her lack of heartbeat. The silence. Screaming out at him.

Spike straightened, and quietly spoke the same words he had spoken over a hundred times. With perfect clarity and confidence. "Whatever I was, that's not who I am anymore."

She snickered, and walked even closer. "Darling, it's who you'll always be. A limp, sentimental fool. You want to run, don't you? Scamper off and cry to your new little trollop. Do you think you'll be able to love her?" she leant even closer.

"Think you'll be able to _touch_ her without feeling me?"

He backed away again, but she only followed, touching his face and his body. "All you ever wanted was to be back inside. You finally got your wish, didn't you?" she spat. "Sank your teeth into me. An eternal kiss. "

He shook his head violently. "No. I only wanted to make you well. Mother, you were sick! Sick and dying…"

"You wanted your hands on me. Perhaps you'd like a chance to finish off what you started."

He pushed her away, looking anywhere in this dreaded place of memories. At anything except for her. Looked for a doorway. Looked for the ladder. "I love you. I did. Not like this."

"Just like this," she disagreed, sneering. Moving closer to him. "This is what you always wanted. Who's my dark little prince?" She tilted her head upwards, trying to kiss him.

In a panic, Spike pushed her away, knocking her down. "No!"

She snarled, transformed into her vampiric visage, and threw him backwards. –I don't remember it being like this-. He crashed into the wall and whimpered as he felt two ribs break and bury themselves in his heart. Dazedly, something told him he had died again, and yet was still living…

"William… there you are."

Stinging pain enveloped his chest as he looked up through hazy eyes. Dimly, he heard the voice. It dripped with relief. Screwing up his eyes, he looked to the owner.

It took him a few seconds to realize.

"Cecily?" he breathed. She smiled at him. His voice bore all the reverence you would give to a goddess.

Confusion riddled him as he stared at her. She was… he gulped. Even more beautiful than he'd remembered.

"We've been looking all over for you! Your mother's ill… in hospital…"

Despite knowing that this couldn't possibly be, Spike grabbed her arm. "Where! Where is she? I need to go to her!"

"Oh William," Cecily smiled kindly. "Why do you care? She hurt you. Hurt you so badly…" her fingers danced across his chest. He winced as pain shot from her fingertips to lodge deep into his skin,

Spike gaped at her. He knew that he looked like a fool, but he gaped at her nonetheless. Her words seemed to blur and echo as if she was at one end of a wind tunnel, and he was at the other. Shaking his head furiously, he caught her last words.

"…Stay with me. Read me your poetry."

"Okay, something is seriously wrong here," he growled, trying to collect his senses. "Where is my mother!"

"Your mother?" Cecily asked curiously. "No, it's Drusilla who's ill."

"Drusilla!" Spike's knuckles whitened even more, as images of his black princess assailed him. Pale face. Adoring smile. Wicked grin. Lustrous hair. "Take me to her!"

"But William… I thought you loved me," Cecily looked hurt.

"First of all," Spike said bluntly, shaking free of whatever spell her presence had seemed to place on him, his hand coming to clench down on her arm. "I'm not William. Not anymore. You were the one who changed that."

He tightened his grip, and she screamed slightly. Perturbed, he let her go again, and then tried to change into game face. He was surprised when he couldn't.

"Can't you… love me like this?" Cecily looked at him again in hurt. She was beautiful in this light. "Why can't you love me like this?"

Before he cold reply, Cecily's face suddenly changed. Ridges appeared, and Spike recoiled from her as golden eyes flashed from between bony brows. "Do you love me like this?"

Spike merely gaped again.

Cecily sighed, and then changed into Halfrek. "Do you recognize me now, William?"

"You're… you're a vengeance demon…" was all Spike could stutter out.

"Well?" Halfrek twirled around, still in demon face and yet still wearing Cecily's clothes. "Do you love me now?"

"I…" Spike mumbled.

"What's wrong, William?" Halfrek moved closer, her skirts rustling as she went. She brushed up against him, and he shuddered.

"I-I…" he stuttered.

"William?"

"Wh… what?"

"You're beneath me."

Spike felt her lash out with demonic strength, tossing him halfway across the room to crash into a wall. His body cried out in pain as he felt another rib crack, and lodge straight in his heart along with the other two.

But that wasn't the reason he was crying softly now. He hadn't cried for a long, long time. He could barely remember the last… oh no, wait. When Drusilla had left him.

Speaking of which…

Suddenly, he was in a palace. Artificial lights danced as fireworks exploded into the night. People whirled around in graceful steps, ignoring the broken man leaning against a wall, clad only in jeans and a red, ripped shirt.

"And here I wonder... what possible catastrophe came crashing down from heaven and brought this dashing stranger..."

Spike slowly raised his head, tears shining from his eyes. "D… Dru?" he asked in disbelief and a naked hope and longing.

"To tears?" She reached out, and traced the lines, digging in with her nails. Spike winced as a trail of blood began to flow simultaneously, mixing in a liquid combination of blood and tears… his life.

"God Dru," he stared at her, entranced. "I've missed you so much…" his voice cracked.

"Grrr…" she growled, suddenly standing up. "Too human! Naughty Spike! What's happened to you? The stars… they said my black knight was here. But I see nothing but white!"

"No, I'm here, Dru," Spike said soothingly, painstakingly standing up, mindful of his broken rib. "I'll always be here…" he moved to hug her, but she stepped backwards.

"No!" she cried despondently, moving away from him. She knocked aside a candle holder, but still, no-one noticed. "No! Too human! Spike, my Spike… what's happened to you? Your blood! It's tainted…"

"What's happened to me?" Spike cried, feeling anger surge in his undead heart. "You! That's bloody well what! I loved you, Dru. I still love you! But as soon as Angelus got back… you never looked once at me! Always 'Daddy this' and 'Daddy that'… and then I stopped the world ending for you! I stopped it for you, Dru, so there'd still be the stars and the soddin' night to talk to! Still be the fight! Still be the humans and the fresh, sweet blood…"

Suddenly, she was dancing. Swirling in her red dress like the night of her birthday. He watched entranced as her hips swayed closer to his… and then stopped.

"No more dancing with me, Spike," she hissed. "Not until you come back! Change! Too much change! What have they _done!_"

"Come back?" he demanded. "What do you mean?"

"Where's my deadly little Spike?" Dru purred, tracing his chest with a sharp nail. It pierced the fabric and somehow eased the pain of his broken rib. "Where's he gone? Can't find him… the stars can't find him either…"

"I'm here baby, right here," Spike assured her. "It's just the chip…"

"No!" Drusilla cried, and pushed him back with all of her vampiric strength. He smashed into the wall again, and this time he roared with agony as he felt three ribs break, and smash into his heart. He knew somewhere in his mind that this wasn't anatomically possible, but through the haze of tears, the rest of his consciousness focussed on Drusilla, walking towards him now in the dress she wore when she first turned him.

"No! Too human! Too human…"

"You sound like the bloody Judge himself, sweetheart," Spike managed to rasp out midst his broken tears before everything went black.

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**(Please, Read and Review! I'm sorry about the update wait, by the way. I was pondering where to go with Spike's dream.)**


	12. Restless: Part III

**Chapter 10**

**Restless: Part III**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters except for Mia, Bryan, Daniel, and Cassandra. Joss Whedon owns all of the others.**

**Rating: PG 13. I promise. At least I'm not planning anything above it. There might be some harsh language, a bit of violence, and a few 'references', but nothing above kissing is going to be described without warning.**

**(Ouch, can you believe it? Three parts… Please, no-one kill me for this. Hope you liked the other two! I promise you, though, this is where Restless ends. Enjoy Part III! And Review! Please! Thankyou for all those who've reviewed my work! (And I'm glad you like it, Mooniava!) )**

**8 8 8**

"It's not about right. It's not about wrong. It's about power."

Buffy strode up to him, a nasty sneer on her beautiful face as he glanced up at her. The air around her seemed to grow heavier with her regal imperiousness.

"What are _you_ doing here?" he choked, tears still sliding down his face, along with the blood that still flowed freely from where Drusilla had scratched him.

"Oh, I'm everywhere," she laughed. "All around you… dancing." She began moving her body sinuously to an unknown music, and Spike was instantly drawn back to the first time he had seen her, that night at the Bronze.

"Bloody hell!" Spike got up. "You're not supposed to be here! Not in my head! Not in my heart!"

"These will not destroy you…" someone interrupted him.

"What?" Spike looked at the man, dumbfounded. Two cheese slices that had been cut in half dangled from his hands.

"These will not destroy you," the man repeated again, smiling at him. "They'll just cut you in half…"

He vanished.

"Oh, I'll cut you in half alright," Buffy drew his attention back to her. "I'll do more than that."

"Just try, Slayer," he snarled, going into demon face, ignoring all of the physical and emotional agony he was suffering. "If it weren't for this sodding chip, we'd see who'd win this!"

"But it's a dance," she smiled coyly as they moved into battle positions. "And you can't win a dance. It just goes on and on and on… until the music stops."

"So let's fight then…"

"Uh, uh," the Slayer skipped backwards. "The music hasn't changed yet… but it'll never end…"

Suddenly, they were back in his crypt, and darkness enfolded them. The only one candle remained alight. The rest had been blown out by chill gusts of wind coming in from the open door.

"Slayer?" he asked cautiously. He could feel her, hear her heartbeat… but where was she?

"Right behind you," she whispered, and then struck with Slayer strength as he turned.

This time, he screamed as he fell backwards into the wall once more. The rest of his ribs had lodged into his heart, broken by her blow, filling his body with a sharp pain he hadn't experienced for a long, long time. Not evenat Angelus' hands hadhe ever felt this pain.Even his Mother, Cecily and Dru hadn't hurt as badly as this. He screamed again, a scream of utter desolation and agony.

He couldn't even see her this time, but he knew that she moved closer to him, standing over him.

"You're beneath me."

He snapped.

"I know that!" he roared. "I bloody well _know_ that! Beneath everyone! Always beneath everyone!"

He panted, curled up in a ball against the unyielding wall, and then sobbed quietly. "Go away."

"Oh no," she smiled. "I'm staying. I'm not leaving you. I'll run away, but I won't leave."

He only wept harder.

"You know what, Spike?" Buffy asked, a sadistic tinge to her tone. "You're nothing. Can't be a man, can't be a demon. Oh poor, poor little Spikey."

Between tears, he snarled at her.

"Angelus was more a demon than you'll ever be. And Angel more a man. Doesn't that hurt?"

"Go away…" he sobbed. "Oh please, go away…"

Everything rushed in on him now, hitting his vampiric senses mercilessly. His pain, most of all. Shredded ruins of a once proud demon lying in a mixture of blood and tears. The stench of the crypt. He hadn't really had too much time to clean it, yet. Just lighting the candles… he loved candles…

Her scent. A mixture of vanilla, roses, and danger. Her heartbeat, sounding in his ears, in time with the blood rushing along her veins. It sounded like music…

And then it was all gone. Spike felt an unnatural heat on his skin, and stood up in demon face. He tried to change back, but found he couldn't. Then he opened his eyes, and almost screamed again as he realized that he was in the sunlight. In a cemetery. For the first time in over one hundred years… oh no, wait. Midst all of his pain, he smiled wryly. The ring of Amara…

"You don't belong here, you know."

He turned to see Tara walking towards him, her golden-brown hair wrapped in a loose bun at the back of her head. He suddenly realized that he'd been totally bereft of his beloved leather duster until now… it hung around his shoulders in an almost comforting embrace, yet he felt a strange urge to hurl it away.

"I know that, Glinda…" he turned to look up at her, realizing he was curled against the cemetery wall. It was so high…

"I know I'm not supposed to be here," he laughed bitterly. "I'm supposed to be beneath… beneath…"

He scrabbled at the dirt, feeling it give way under his fingertips. Suddenly his chip fired, and he fell back with a howl.

"You don't belong here, in the sunlight."

"Yeah, I know. In the darkness. In my grave," Spike spat.

"No, you don't belong there either," Tara disagreed softly.

"_Where?"_ he demanded then, desperation overcoming him. "_Where_ do I belong? I just want to be… I just want to find… somewhere I _belong_…"

The last word was almost a keening wail. Tara looked compassionately at the vampire who had stopped digging. "You belong in the shadow," she whispered. "In the grey. In the shadow, until you finally choose."

"Choices," Spike snickered, choking on his own bile. "I always screw them up."

"Don't make mistakes with this one," Tara warned. "It's important."

"Isn't it always?" he sneered.

She merely smiled at him again. "You'll be needing this."

She handed him a card. He looked at the picture. A red river. One bank had life abounding on it. Flowers, trees, gentle swallows and deer. The other was barren, devoid of life. Charred and burnt, with twisted bodies lying in the ground. With a sudden catching of his breath, he knew that all of those bodies, and they stretched out for miles, were his victims. Then… why the life on the other side?

"Arrakis, blood," Spike whispered.

"Yes, life," she affirmed. "Here."

He looked at the card. "But what am I supposed to do with this?" he asked empty air.

Tara had disappeared. He cursed, and threw the card down into the makeshift hole he had made. It immediately dissolved into a heady mixture that shone as it sparkled back at him. Crimson blood, and yet…

He hadn't realized he was still crying, blood combining with tears to run down his face. A single drop dribbled down from his eyes to land in the strange, shimmering hole. Immediately, a wall sprung up.

It was different from the ones he'd been thrown against. Staggering to his feet, he looked up. He was in darkness, now. The wall seemed to block out the sun at this level. But the middle of the wall was grey, light filtering through cracks. At the very top, it was pure, blinding white. Life… the light…

Ignoring the pain of his body and all of the broken ribs, he climbed.

It seemed to go on forever. An endless scrabbling of pain and stone and even wood. The wall stared back at him, filled with memories. It was hard to find a grip. There were times when he fell, and it took all of his strength to pull himself back up again.

Suddenly, he heard a growl, and he was knocked sideways by a body. Before he could fall to the earth, the wall turned horizontal, and shifted into a greyland. Again, one side was in darkness, the other in light. He stood in the middle, his chest afire with excruciating pain, and something circling him.

"Vampire," it hissed.

"Yeah," he winced, feeling blood bubble out of his mouth. "I got that part about a hundred years ago. Who the hell are you?"

It walked from the darkness to the light, and finally, he could see it properly. A woman, clad in rags, with black dreadlocks shadowing her face. She held a stake in one hand, and a sword in the other.

"Oh great," he threw his hands up in the air in disbelief. "Another Slayer, right? How many of you do I have to bloody well kill?"

With the sight of her primal power, he felt his demon respond, and the tears slowly dried. He snarled at her, and she responded in kind.

"Vampire," she hissed again.

"Yeah, I told you," he could almost feel his cocky façade returning, despite the pain and the tears and blood that were drying on his face. "I already knew that."

"Vampires… evil."

"I know that too," he rolled his eyes. "Look, could we just get to fighting? You look animal enough, maybe I can hit you."

She launched herself at him then, and he ducked and rolled, wincing. He knew he couldn't take this fight. The little matter of all his ribs being broken and smashed into his heart played a rather large part of that.

"Vampire! Why do you help?"

"Help?" he asked, puzzled as she circled him again. "I don't help. I kill. Me… the Big Bad, remember?"

She growled, and then attacked again, swift as lightning. Reflexes hampered by pain and emotional exhaustion, Spike was too slow. She knocked him to the ground and stood over him, one foot on his throat.

"You're different."

It was a statement, but he still shook his head. "Nup. No way. Same as any other Master Vamp. Powerful. Big Bad. I want to end the world, see. And kill all the Slayers. Got myself a reputation, after all."

"You're different," she insisted.

"Geez, you're a stubborn, procrastinating chit," he forced out as her throat pressed harder. "Are you just going to stake me already? End my bloody _pain!_" The last words came out as a snarl.

"No stake," she shook her head. "Only the blood. The dance."

Before he could react, she brought the sword down and left a long, incredibly deep diagonal gash across his torso. He screamed as the blood flowed out. Vampires couldn't die from blood loss, but he knew from experience that being drained of all blood made him go berserk…

Wait…

He felt a sudden lightness, and choked as he could almost physically feel himself turning to dust. Blood mixed with ashes and tears.

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

"Where are my friends?" Buffy asked dangerously.

"You're asking the wrong questions," Tara explained.

"Make her speak," Buffy ordered.

The… cavewoman? Shook her head again.

"I have no speech," Tara said. "No name. I live in the action of death, the blood cry, the penetrating wound. I am destruction. Absolute ... alone."

Buffy frowned with a sudden realization. "The Slayer," she breathed.

"The first," Tara agreed.

Buffy looked down at her hand, and realized she was holding a pile of Tarot shaped cards. As she looked closer, she saw Giles, Willow, Xander, and herself in the living room watching TV. Then, surprisingly, she saw Spike in the picture. He was laughing with them.

The mountains loomed behind her.

"I am not alone," Buffy said softly.

The first Slayer shook her head, and Tara answered for her. "The Slayer does not walk in this world."

"No," Buffy looked her in the eye, a fierce pride in her voice. "I walk. I talk. I shop, I sneeze. I'm gonna be a fireman when the floods roll back."

The first Slayer lifted her chin in anger.

Buffy ignored her, and kept going. "There's trees in the desert since you moved out. And I don't sleep on a bed of bones."

Buffy's eyes hardened. "Now give me back my friends."

"No ... friends!" the First Slayer growled in a hoarse voice full of anger. "Just the kill! We ... are ... alone! No vampires! No friends! Just… alone!"

"Hold your enemies closer to you than your allies," the words rolled off Buffy's tongue. Then she made a face. "In fact, he's not even my ally… okay, fine, he is… but he's a mortal enemy turned ally… what does that make him…?

"No allies. Alone!" the First repeated. "Kill the vampires! No friends!"

A bald man leaned in between Buffy and the First Slayer, holding up two slices of cheese. He grinned and shook the cheese at Buffy, then vanished.

Buffy rolled her eyes. "That's it! I'm waking up."

Before she could move, the First Slayer attacked her, pushing her to the ground and tried to bash her head on it. Dimly, Buffy realized that she could somehow hear African drums. She rolled the first Slayer off her and kicked her. They both leapt up, and then the First Slayer punched her.

Buffy fell backwards. The First Slayer tried to punch downwards, but Buffy rolled to her feet and kicked her in the back. She kicked again but the First Slayer ducked. Buffy punched. It was identical to the first one the First Slayer threw at her.

The First Slayer fell backwards.

They both stood, glaring. Faceoff. Buffy shook her head.

"It's over. We don't do this any more."

In response, the First Slayer snarled and grabbed her again and they rolled down the flawless dune, clutching at each other and rolling over and over in a flurry of kicks and punches, before Buffy found her voice again.

"_Enough!"_

Buffy woke up on the floor, still covered by the blanket. She looked around quickly, and saw Willow, Xander and Giles sleeping peacefully. Groaning, she stood up, but then heard a growl from behind her. The First Slayer landed on top of her, bowling her over, bringing the stake down repeatedly in a frenzied rhythm of death,

Buffy rolled her eyes. "Are you _quite_ finished?"

The First Slayer pulled back, surprised.

"It's over, okay? I'm going to ignore you, and you're going to go away." Buffy sat up, and then stood, her eyes meeting those of the First Slayer's.

"You're really gonna have to get over the whole ... primal power thing," she tossed over her shoulder as she walked to the couch. The First Slayer stared at her in bewilderment. "You're not the source of me. Also, in terms of hair care, you really wanna say, what kind of impression am I making in the workplace? 'Cause-"

They woke.

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**(Did you like that? The end of the dream... finally. Please, Read and Review!)**


	13. Stirrings

**Chapter 11: Stirrings**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters except for Mia, Bryan, Daniel, and Cassandra. Joss Whedon owns all of the others.**

**Rating: PG 13. I promise. At least I'm not planning anything above it. There might be some harsh language, a bit of violence, and a few 'references', but nothing above kissing is going to be described without warning.**

**A/N (Wow! I'm so happy: ) . Two reviews for one chapter! I'm updating now for you, Rowan and Dieu Anonyme:), Thanks .). I agree, I should have written a shorter section for Restless, or at least divided it up, but I guess I just had so much planned for Spike that I didn't think. Maybe I will change the format once I get around to editing. Thanks, all of you! Now I hope you enjoy Chapter 11!)**

**8 8 8**

Buffy walked through the relative peace of the cemetery, relishing the cool chill that accompanied cloudless nights. She vaguely realized that an infinity of starsblanketed the sky, shining softly likeshattered crystal, and wondered why she'd never noticed. She guessed that with the business of staking vamps and killing demons… she'd never really gotten the chance to just enjoy the darkness and the peace. The quietness. No-one yelling at her to save the world again.

Sometimes, she enjoyed times like this on patrol. When there was no-one else around. Not Giles, not Willow and Tara and Anya and Xander… not even Riley. When they were around, she couldn't let herself go like this. She was too caught up in worrying what might happen to any of them if she relaxed.

But now… peaceful. Until she reached her destination.

Spike's crypt loomed up in the darkness. It wasn't large, but in relation to the size of the other crypts dotting this particular graveyard, it was one of the bigger ones.She continued her walk on the grassy floor, surroundedby gravestones.She finally reached it, and tried to knock on the stone.

The door wouldn't shift. Losing patience, Buffy knocked on the door again. And again.

Finally, she gave up all pretence of civility and just kicked the door in.

The door opened to quietness. Stepping in hesitantly, Buffy realized this was the first time she'd been inside. She looked over it critically.

He hadn't done much with the place. It was free of cobwebs and too much dust, however. A small refrigerator hummed, and a comfortable, yet somewhat stained, leather armchair sat facing a blank television screen. Every available space was dotted with candles. The ledges… the tables… the…

Her eyes reached the sarcophagi.

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"So, considering you know what the address is, shouldn't we go out and find them?"

The hospital ward was quiet. Around them, Initiative soldiers groaned from the injuries they'd received. Every so often, down the dim, sterile hallways, they heard an intern pace, the footsteps echoing, but no-one ever came into the ward. Daniel and Cassandra were sitting on the edge of their beds, facing each other in the semi-darkness. The whites of their eyes seemed to gleam.

"Not now. Definitely not now. It's night-time. Only idiots venture outside in Sunnydale at night-time…" Cassandra frowned. "Come to think of it, that means half of the population here fall into that category."

"Come on," Daniel scoffed. "It can't be that bad."

Cassandra paused before replying. Images flashed at her insistently from his words. _People strolling around at night. Killed. A man running to the school, killed horribly by a demon that the Ripper and his mates had used for highs. Horribly dead. Eviscerations. Flayings. Vampire fodder. Sacrifices to open the Hellmouth… again. And again. And again..._

_Huge demons. Nasty horns. Brute strength. Very, very, long claws. _

"Oh… you'd be surprised," Cassandra snorted at last. "Come on. Wait for morning."

"Oh, alright," he grumbled. Then he looked at her closer. "You should definitely get some sleep."

"Only if you do too," she retorted. "I'm not risking waking up and finding that you've been eaten or flayed alive."

Daniel shuddered. "It's really that bad?"

_Eviscerations. Flayings. Vampire fodder. Sacrifices. Reptile demons. Hellmouth._

"Yeah. It is. Trust me."

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Buffy knew that when Spike slept, he breathed. She didn't know why. When she'd had the rare occasion to see Angel sleep, she knew that he was as unmoving as a rock. Then again, the two vampires were as alike as day and night.

Now? Spike wasn't even breathing, so she instantly knew something was wrong. As she neared, she realized what it was.

She didn't bother to check what expletive had just leapt out of her mouth, only unconsciously knowing that Giles would have winced at it. Immediately, she was by Spike's side, desperately attempting to wake him.

"Wake up, Spike! Wake up! Goddammit! Wake up!"

Rivulets of blood flowed down his pale alabaster chest. In her frenzy, Buffy hadn't even realized that underneath the thin blanket, Spike slept skyclad. But thewoven materialwas stained with red. Stained with blood. And that was all she saw. That, and the overwhelming need to save him. To stop the blood. To wake him up.

"Wake up!"

In response, he groaned, and then screamed, a horrible, echoing scream that nearly split Buffy's eardrums. Frantically, she began trying to stem the blood with his sheet.

"Wake up you stupid vampire!" she raged. "Stop bleeding!"

He moaned again. The blood bubbled out from under her touch relentlessly, fighting her every effort to smother it. She didn't remember that vampires that had been bled dry went half insane. All she did was work feverishly, trying to staunch it.

He moaned again, and she felt another rush of crimson liquid assault her fingers, but slower now.A small flickering of triumph wovee its way through her as she continued to administrate thefirst aid that she knew. The blood was stopping.

It seemed like hours passed before the bleeding finally stopped, and Buffy sagged with relief. Slowly, she began cleaning the long, deep gashes on his skin, wondering where they'd come from.

She got her answer when her eyes fell onto his nails, bloodstained. In horror, she realized what he had done.

_Jesus, he'd ripped through his own skin. _

Buffy sat back, a whirl of thoughts crossed through her mind, along with the reason for coming here in the first place. Silently, she thanked her intuition for sending her along. Something had warned her that Spike would have been the worst hit out of all of them. Yes, the First Slayer had technically 'killed' them, but her fury at a vampire would have been even more centred, more violent.

She didn't know why she'd even bothered. Why she'd cared.

_Ah, but you do,_ a small voice whispered inside. The joining. It had changed them all. Shown them a side of everyone that they had never seen. The thought of losing the fifth piece of the puzzle had frightened all of them.

This was getting damned weird, she pondered, before she raised her eyes and looked into the cerulean blue depths of Spike's.

"Blood," he whispered.

"Yeah, you were bleeding," Buffy jumped off the sarcophagus nervously, wincing as the words spilled out of her mouth. _-Geez, stating the obvious much?-_

"No, no… all about the blood. Something's gonna change. Something's gonna change. Didn't ever say they would, did they? Why? I thought I'd already changed. Already changed enough. Why the blood? Why's it gonna be so different…?"

Buffy stared at him in consternation as he sat up, touching the bandaged wounds on his chest. Running his fingers over them in bewilderment. Confusion sparkled in his eyes as he saw the crimson seeping through. It dried on his fingers.

"This? It looks like blood."

He licked it off his finger, and Buffy made a face.

"Alright, stop with the hysterics and the plain grossness," she said uncomfortably. "What's…"

"It tastes like blood. It smells like it. Why won't it stay that way?"

"You've really gone crazy, haven't you?" Buffy demanded, reaching for her stake unconsciously for protection.

Life and understanding seemed to leap back into his azure eyes in a second, and she almost jumped again at the change. He stared in awe at her, his gaze shifting from her face to the bandages. She could almost swear she saw a childlike innocence in the face of the demon who had killed for over a century.

"You… you stopped it."

She felt a tingle of… what was it? Unease? Excitement? move over her skin. Their eyes connected, and she found herself drowning in them. Incredible cerulean blue… "What do you mean?" she forced out, trying to break the hold he had somehow woven over her.

He shook himself, laughed, and she could see the façade slipping over again. "That bossy little chit. The First Slayer? Reminded me of you."

"What?" Buffy demanded indignantly, realizing with almost a pang of regret that she could no longer feel the connection. Shutters had slid, cutting her out. "Did you see her hair? And the whole primal thing? So not me."

"Oh, don't deny it, Slayer," Spike scoffed. "Don't even try. Tell me you haven't felt the rush when you're fighting. That primal feeling. What do you think our little battle rage in the Initiative was, pretty rainbows? No, that was pure and primal strength, and you bathe it in every day."

"That's not true."

"Still in denial, eh? Then what about the midnight escapades after soldier boy isn't enough for you? That _hunger_ that's still there, that will stay there until it's sated? He'll never be enough for you, you know."

"You're a pig, Spike," Buffy snapped, stalking away. "And since you're so obviously fine, I'm leaving now."

The vampire watched as she slammed the door shut, and before he could stop himself, he felt a word rip itself forcefully from is throat.

"Thankyou."

8 8 8

Buffy paused for a second outside his crypt. She could have sworn that she had heard a soft 'thankyou' behind her.

_No_.- Her mind angrily denied. Soulless demons don't feel anything. Not gratitude, not love, not anything.

And she continued home, to where her family and her friends were waiting for her.

Yet there was something there that she had left behind…

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

Stubborn chit. Bloody PTBs. Stupid dream.

I know I wasn't myself when I was doing all the babbling. As if I'd go on like that. Pfeh. Bloody weird, though. It was like I was just standing on the sidelines, watching someone animate my own body. So, it was a message to the Slayer, and someone had decided to use me.

Stupid pillocks. They coulda asked me first, you know. As for the dream… no words can even begin to describe how pissed off I was at that. I did not have to taken through the systematic failures and losses of my life. Not again. I'd had over a hundred years to acclimatize to those bloody knives. Didn't need them redoubled. I had nightmares for three months after that blasted dream. Sure, I know the PTBs were trying to tell me something, but couldn't they have found a less painful way to do it?

Stupid. Bloody. Pillocks.

'The Powers That Bollocks-everything-up.'

8 8 8

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	14. Meetings

**Chapter 12: Meetings**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters except for Mia, Bryan, Daniel, and Cassandra. Joss Whedon owns all of the others.**

**Rating: PG 13. I promise. At least I'm not planning anything above it. There might be some harsh language, a bit of violence, and a few 'references', but nothing above kissing is going to be described without warning.**

**(Oh my God! Two reviews again! Thankyou so much, everyone! Yep, I'm updating for you, Red Wulf and Dieu Anonyme. : ). Also, I'm going to be away until Saturday 17th… but I'll update as soon as I get back! Still, that's no excuse not to review! Thanks, everyone! Now, I hope you enjoy…)**

**8 8 8**

The Summers' house was dead to the world as the sun crept slowly over the edge of the horizon. Even as people began to stir, there was an odd silence about the house. The neighbours didn't worry. In Sunnydale, people lived in such a constant state of denial that they didn't even wonder if anything was wrong.

Nothing was, of course. Those inside were just sleeping off a night of popcorn, Apocalypse Now, bad jokes, and the spirit of the First Slayer killing them in their dreams.

Understandably, they _were_ still asleep. The clock neared eight o'clock, and then nine. Joyce crept out as silent as a mouse, unwilling to wake the lot sprawled across coaches and blankets, readying herself for another day's work at the gallery. The entire house was enveloped in silence once again, save for the gentle snores from Giles' and Xander's respective directions.

There was a tentative knock on the door.

No-one stirred.

There was another knock on the door, louder this time.

Giles rolled over on the couch.

This time, there was a series of knocks as the person at the front door grew more impatient.

Buffy finally ran down the stairs and yanked the door open crossly.

"Who are you?" she demanded.

It was a fairly bright Sunnydale morning, and Buffy was inordinately tired. The tussle with Adam and the many demons and the dream that had followed after had really drained her strength. As such, she wasn't in the best of moods from being woken up. She winced inwardly as she remembered Giles asleep on the couch, Xander in front of the T.V, and Willow somewhere upstairs in the spare room.

While Buffy was musing, Daniel and Cassandra hung back on the porch, suddenly self conscious.

Oh god, Cassandra thought. After all these years of watching Buffy. All those years watching every episode, _and_ the commentaries, _and_ the special add-ons, _and_ buying the DVDs… she'd finally met the real person.

Not the actor in another dimension. _The_ Buffy.

Buffy.

The Vampire Slayer.

Buffy looked them over. The boy was on the taller side of average, with a medium build. Blue eyes glimmered from under a shock of unruly hazel hair. The girl however looked almost ethereal, her emerald eyes framed by her auburn tresses. Buffy sensed something about her instantly, and she frowned. She'd only ever felt that when…

"Uh, you look different without the casts," she said lamely, recognizing them. She had to admit she hadn't remembered much. Just the blurs of fighting demons and Adam, but mostly the tingling feeling that had enveloped her after the joining spell, that whispered to her that all it had to take was one touch, one will, one mind, and they would be together again. She'd barely noticed the two, who had been half-carried half-dragged along with the Initiative soldiers. They hadn't had time to question their rather curious arrival.

"I don't know why we healed," the boy said quietly. "I assume it was for a reason."

"Oh, I see. Right"

_What do you do when you have two people standing on your doorstep that you met briefly for two minutes before andwho helped to save your friends' lives?_

"Um…"

Buffy noted with curiosity that the girl appeared to be extremely worried, and on the verge of blurting something out. Her observation turned out to be correct. "Did the First Slayer hurt you?" the girl asked anxiously.

Okay, that did it.

Buffy couldn't even be bothered with the exclamations, couldn't be bothered with wondering how the girl knew. "Come in," she said wearily. "I'm sure there is a reason, as you said."

Before Buffy could close the door after them, a smoking blanket rushed in, and they heard muffled curses as it instinctively veered left and quickly pulled the curtains closed, landing with an abrupt "OW!" on the couch that Giles happened to still occupy.

Giles leapt up with a curse, and Spike fell back onto Xander, napping by the television, who in turn yelped. The various exclamations then summoned a sleepy Willow from upstairs. The entire household then began talking, and Buffy's head felt like it was going to split at the astonishing speed of strange events.

"Good Lord, what are you doing here!"

"Who are you?"

"What's happening?"

"Ouch!"

"Would you get off me, Evil Undead?"

"Owww…"

"What's the fuss?"

"Who are you?"

"What's happening?"

"Sunlight! Arrgh… sunlight!"

"Don't be stupid you… stupid evil undead! You're safe now, what with the curtain-pulling."

"Watch who you're calling stupid, Whelp. In case you hadn't noticed, I am burnt over here!"

"And I should care… why?"

"By the Powers, you lot really are just a bunch of kids, aren't you?"

Huh? Buffy thought, her headache growing. That didn't sound like anything anyone here would say. At least, not in that specific tone.

"Even you," it continued, and she saw the owner of the voice pointing at Spike. "And please! You're over a hundred and twenty years old!"

That was when it hit her.

"Whistler!" she yelped.

In a flash, the little demon was pinned to the wall, and there was complete silence as Buffy slowly but surely throttled him.

"Hey… kid…" he gasped, wheezing. "Lay off a bit, would you?"

She let him go, and he fell, drinking in huge breaths of life-giving oxygen. When he was done recovering, he glared at her. "What was that for?"

"The last time you came here, you came to tell me to kill my boyfriend," Buffy reminded him coldly. "We've just been through another almost-apocalypse here, or at least a World War, so what the hell do you want?"

"Well I'd would have told you if you hadn't tried to kill me, Slayer," Whistler whinged, rubbing his neck.

" 'Lo Whistler," Spike grumbled. "Why couldn't you have just beamed me up along with Slayer gal instead of making me run through the bloody sewers and almost get fried?"

"Well you made it, didn't you?" Whistler asked.

"S'not the point," Spike groused.

"Hey, cut it with the banter!" Buffy said sharply. "Whistler! Why are you here?"

"Look behind you, pet," Spike advised.

And that was when Buffy realized why everyone was so silent. Why nobody had questioned her about Whistler, and how she knew him. Why no one had been upforth with the smart comments.

She hadn't changed much. Still had the regal imperiousness in her aura. Still was beautiful, in her don't-mess-with-me way. Still a sister.

Kendra.

Buffy felt the strange tingle that had accompanied her every time she'd met a sister in arms, and then without realizing it, she fell into the Slayer's arms.

Kendra was there immediately, holding her close, and she hugged back just as fiercely. Bringing back memories. The Slayer had changed since she'd died, Buffy decided midst her tears. Her mere touch brought back Angel. But most of all, it brought back Angelus with such a force that it near terrified her.

Strangely, she also brought back memories of Spike.

Smirking, never sneering. Sneering was Angelus' domain.

Bright platinum hair in the darkness of the lair of vampire worshippers.

Confident swagger.

Applause in the alley.

Taking away Drusilla.

Binding Drusilla and Angelus… Angel, together.

Finally, allying himself with her.

"But… you were dead," Buffy whispered half-disbelievingly. "I… I killed you."

Spike coughed in the background. "Well…"

"Shut up!" she snapped.

"I agree," Kendra added her throaty voice in. It was still warm and rich, with the heavy Caribbean accent, yet still, her voice seemed to have subtly changed. "Dis is a time for good liddle vampires to keep their mouths shut!"

Spike, looking outraged and indignant, immediately quieted when Whistler whispered something in his ear. Sulking, he turned away, and Buffy couldn't help stifle a smile through her pooling tears.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry… I shouldn't have fallen for his trick. I'm so sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry…"

"Do not be, Buffy," Kendra said gently. "It was my time. And I have achieved greater things."

"She's right, you know," Whistler commented.

"You shut up as well," Buffy flared.

"Actually, no, I won't," Whistler dusted himself off absentmindedly. "We didn't come here for a social visit. The Powers sent us with a message."

"Really?" Xander found his voice again. "So you're like the Powers' Postman? Who are the Powers, anyway?"

Whistler glared at him, and Spike even stopped sulking long enough to chuckle. The Powers' Postman indeed. Whistler would never live that down. Sometimes, he had to admit, the Whelp did say the most amusing things…

"They are the Powers that Be," he replied simply. "And that other question doesn't even merit a reply."

"Well, what about the 'why are you here?' part?" Buffy asked. "Because… as much as I liked to see Kendra, I can't imagine why the Powers would have sent you both down. Especially you."

"Zere was a mistake," Kendra answered.

"A mistake? In that you were the only one supposed to come?" Giles queried.

"No. Zere was mistake. Surely you have been wondering why zese two children are here?" she waved at Daniel and Cassandra.

They shrunk back again as everyone's gaze fell on them. Whistler merely walked up to them and smiled.

"Glad to see you got here in one piece," he said cheerfully.

"Are you the one responsible for us healing?" Daniel asked, awe and scepticism colouring his tone at the same time.

"Me? Nah… someone else took care of that. You would've been useless for the next couple of months trudging around in those casts. I've got to admit, that gang did a fair job on you."

"Yeah, they did."

"So why are they here?" Spike cut across the conversation. "Why would the Powers bother with sending us a half-grown weakling," he gestured at Daniel, "and a little girl fresh from the nursery?"

Buffy took note of how easily the word 'us' had slipped from his lips, and frowned, wondering about a million questions that had just poured into her head. "The question I'm thinking about is why are you guys bothering to help me now? You never have before." Her voice took on a bitter edge. "Just prophecies telling me I'm going to die and that messengers saying I have to kill my boyfriend."

"Ah, well," Whistler coughed. "You'll have to thank Miss. Kendra for that."

Giles looked at Kendra. "How on earth did you manage to change the rules?"

"Just before the she-vampiress… Drusilla…" the Carribean Slayer's tone softened slightly, "killed me… she showed me zome things. Things zat everyone had always told me I could not have. Friends, my mother and father. An equal to love. Even children. A long life stretching ahead of me. Difficult, but still a life. Fighting demons night and day, and yet surrounded by others. I saw what you might eventually have," she nodded towards Buffy.

"But zehn, ze time passed, and I saw what happened to you. There was a big mistake. Nozzing happened the way it should have. And so, I demanded the Powers that Be themselves zat helping us out once in a while would not go amiss," her beautiful eyes hardened. "Zey wouldn't listen."

"But then," Whistler added, looking at the tanned Slayer admiringly, "She bugged them so much they gave in. Some deal they made with the higher-ups and the opposition. They're not allowed direct intervention, but something pretty close."

"So what are these two for then?" Spike gestured towards them again.

"That, you'll have to find out for yourself," Whistler grinned. "But know this, all of you. The most vital thing instruction that I give you now is to stay together. We didn't fiddle with the enjoining spell just for everything to go back to the way it was. We only get one shot at this, so we'd best make it good!"

With that, the little balance demon vanished. Kendra lingered for a moment longer, rewarding Buffy with a smile, and then moved to kneel in front of Daniel and Cassandra.

"Do you know why you're here yet?" Kendra asked, addressing Daniel.

He looked at her closely, scrutinizing her with sapphire eyes. "No, I really don't."

"You will," she answered cryptically, and then turned to Cassandra. Her stern face softened.

"You have much to go through. Stay strong."

"I… I will," Cassandra stuttered.

Kendra smiled at her, and then turned to Spike."And you. I'm going to be watching you, no matter whatzeWhistler says."

Spike gulped.

With a last smile towards all of them, Kendra vanished, leaving complete silence behind her.

8 8 8

**(Did you like that? Please, R&R!)**


	15. Pancake Divination

**Chapter 13: Pancake Divination**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters except for Mia, Bryan, Daniel, and Cassandra. Joss Whedon owns all of the others.**

**Rating: PG 13. I promise. At least I'm not planning anything above it. There might be some harsh language, a bit of violence, and a few 'references', but nothing above kissing is going to be described without warning.**

**A/N (Sorry 'bout the delay. I've been away for a bit on holiday... and came back to no reviews (cries). So I slouched around for a little while, and then finally decided to post again in the hope... the vain hope...**

**Right, I'll cut off the melodrama, now. :). I hope you enjoy this chapter, though I guess it's more of a filler than anything else...)**

**8 8 8**

"Um… pancakes, anyone?"

Willow's shaky voice reverberated around the room, where everybody was still looking at the spot Kendra had vacated. An aura of wonder and amazement hung palpably over them, broken by Daniel stepping forwards to face Spike.

"Oh, and, just to set the record straight… I'm _not_ a half-grown weakling. And we both got out of the nursery about twelve years ago."

Spike snorted, finding refuge in sarcasm from what Whistler had said. "Oh, is that so? How old are you?"

"Fifteen," Daniel replied softly.

"Exactly," he smirked. "Half-grown weakling. You just proved my point."

"Hey, lay off him, evil undead," Xander defended him. "At least his heart beats."

"He's still a half-grown weakling."

Daniel's eyes flared angrily, but Cassandra stepped up put a hand gently on his elbow. "That's Spike, and that's Xander," she informed him quietly.

"Here, how do you know my name?"

"Cool," Xander looked pleased. "You know my name as well, huh?"

"How do you know everything?" Buffy asked. "We've never seen you before in our lives."

"Maybe something Hellmouthy," Willow suggested.

Giles sighed, and began to clean his glasses. "I suspect that there is a lot that you need to tell us. Frankly, I'm still quite tired from our encounter with the First Slayer. Willow, are those pancakes still on offer? Things might be easier to digest while we're eating."

"It'd make sense, wouldn't it?" Spike snickered. "You can only digest if you eat, after all."

Giles glared at him, giving him the famous look of librarians worldwide when they find people eating inside libraries. "I'm not in the mood, Spike. Whistler sent you for a reason, I believe. But that doesn't mean I have to listen to your smart comments."

"Whatever, Rupes," Spike shrugged offhandedly, sauntering into the dining room, mostly everyone following. Willow immediately began sorting out ingredients on the island, not noticing the girl in the doorway until she softly cleared her throat.

"Um… I was just wondering, can I help?" Cassandra half-squeaked.

"Sure," Willow grinned. "Here, help me beat up the eggs."

They mixed in silence for a while, occasionally giggling over the argument clearly going on in the dining room. Eventually, Daniel slipped in as well.

"Mr. Giles thinks that we should call Tara and Anya here," he said uncomfortably. "He said you knew their numbers?"

"Oh, of course…"

As Willow reached for the telephone, Daniel joined Cassandra. Soon, sizzling noises rent the air, filling the room with a delicious smell. The doorbell rang.

As Tara and Anya filed in, it suddenly struck Cassandra that she was still in shock. Barely a day ago, she'd been lying in hospital, her body battered and bruised, and a pessimistic view of the future. Now, however, she was in the land of dreams. These weren't actors she was seeing. This was the real deal. She'd seen them last night, in the exhausting aftermath of a magical spell…

There was magic in this world.

The thought hit her hardest amongst all of her musings. The Powers that Be had sent them here for a reason. But she was still completely confused. What good could she do here?

Reality began to sink in. This was a world of magic, yes. But also demons and darkness and evil. She was standing on the doorway of the Hellmouth itself.

_So **not** going to think about that. _

It scared her. She looked at Willow and Tara, smiling and laughing together as they trooped into the dining room, and saw instead Tara shot, lying on the floor, blood oozing from the wound. _I promise I won't let that happen. Maybe this is why…_

She saw Willow filled with dark magic, wreaking bloody horror across Sunnydale, and Warren, completely skinned in the throes of death.

_Oh God… please may I be able to stop that from happening…_

She saw Anya following them, kissing Xander when she reached him. But then she saw Anya, cloven in two by a Bringer's sword.

She stayed and fought. She didn't deserve to die. None of them did. I'm going to try…

She heard Giles' voice rise over Spike's in the room next door, and saw Buffy, crying, as Giles left for England. Saw everyone in the group rent apart.

_I am **not** going to let that happen! Giles' leaving triggered off everything else… or at least helped to…_

With the realization slowly dawning on her of what she was supposed to do, she began to shake uncontrollably. Daniel looked alarmed.

"Cassandra, what's wrong!"

"I'll tell you later," she gulped, forcing down the panic. He began to notice something else strange.

"Why are you putting chilli in this last one?" his eyes widened. "Why are you putting a _lot_ of chilli in this last one?"

"Spike," she explained, glad to escape further questioning. "His tastebuds aren't exactly like ours, and I've already checked the fridge. There isn't any blood."

Daniel took a long and shaky breath. "This is going to take a lot of getting used to," he muttered. "It feels like I'm in a dream."

"I know," she finally put the last, chilli pancake on a plate, and took them all in.

Everyone muttered words of appreciation, and Willow beamed. Cassandra managed a shy smile, and Daniel coughed uncomfortably. Golden syrup and honey were quickly emptied. But when she put Spike's plate in front of him, he raised a scarred eyebrow.

"Why's mine orange?"

Cassandra blushed. "Um… I know you like chilli. And I know your tastebuds aren't exactly in full working order, so…"

He looked at her suspiciously as she blushed, and then took a careful bite. Despite his attempt to keep his face sour and menacing, he failed, and a small smile lit his handsome features.

"Thanks," he whispered, taking care that no-one else heard him but her.

"No problem," she smiled shyly again, and then when back to sit with Daniel.

The Scoobies tucked in with relish, and even Spike was enjoying the chilli pancakes. He'd never really thought of this option before. He could actually taste it, which was definitely of the good…

Oh bollocks. I'm talking like them. I'm going mad… oh bloody hell… gotta go back to my crypt and think things through…-

"Now," Giles' voice shocked him out of his thoughts. "Would you care to tell us your story?"

Buffy looked at her seemingly unflappable Watcher in admiration. Right now, she just wanted to put her head under her pillow and stay there, preferably for the next couple of years. Too much had happened in too short a span of time for her to process it.

"Well… I don't actually know," Daniel took the lead after a quick glance to Cassandra. "We were in hospital one second, and then we were someplace else, and someone was talking to us."

"I think it was probably a delegate of the powers," Cassandra added. "They said a lot of things I didn't understand at the time… and there were a lot of images that I kept seeing from this world. Then they spouted off this weird rhyme before they sent us, and that's really all."

"A rhyme, you say?" Giles leaned forwards, completely enraptured and in full Watcher-mode. "Do you remember it? It could be vitally important."

"Not all of it, but…"

"You have been chosen,

Before the death of Time,

To follow the path,

And teach with song and Rhyme

Wisdom of the Ancient,

Follow bardic trail,

Companion to the Singer,

For Light to win, prevail

The First and Last have conquered,

Undo what has gone before,

Or else all Heart has failed,

And lost this endless War

This battle must be won

Though both sides may win and lose,

But the fighting must be done,

For the Heart to finally choose

Argue, lie, tell truths and hate,

Work against the other Fate,

Guide and save, protect and fall,

Die and live again for all…"

Daniel finished, and then saw everyone looking at him in astonishment, save Cassandra who was merely smiling. She'd long ago learnt of his phenomenal memory. "What?"

"Well, I must say," Giles immediately produced a pen and paper, and began writing notes down furiously. "Could you please repeat that?"

Daniel obediently repeated the poem, and Giles leapt up.

"Research," he exclaimed excitedly. "We must go back to my apartment! I've never seen a prophecy like this before!"

"Do you want us to look it up on the internet?" Willow asked.

"Yes," Giles nodded. "Xander, Anya, to the books!"

"Well, I'm not wanted," Spike stood up abruptly and pulled his duster about him. "I'll just go back to the crypt."

"But i-it's daytime," Tara stuttered. "W-won't you get b-burnt?"

"Sewer system," Spike shrugged. "I left the manhole open."

"You can stay here for the day, if you want," Buffy felt the words coming out of her mouth.

He looked at her in surprise, but then shook his head. "No, it's okay. 'M hungry, anyway. No blood here."

"Thanks for that wonderful observation, Peroxide boy," Xander said scathingly.

"Well, of course, there is," Spike grinned evilly. "But it happens to be situated in your body. Care to cut a vein, Whelp?"

Before Xander could reply, Spike had collected his blanket and run out of the door, smoking again.

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

Buffy was looking so obviously bored Cassandra had to look sympathetic. Anya and Xander were snuggling together on the pretext of both reading the same book. Even Willow and Tara were giggling by their computer. Giles was the only one reading animatedly.

Cassandra felt completely useless. And she could feel Daniel tense next to her. Suddenly, she had an idea.

"Is it alright if we explore the town?" she asked Buffy quietly.

"Sure!" Buffy leapt up, smiling cheerily, thanking the teenager silently for this opportunity of freedom. "I can show you around!"

"Not now, Buffy," Giles said absentmindedly. "I need you to look over this. I'm sure Daniel and Cassandra would like to familiarize themselves with Sunnydale, though. Just don't go near the old High School."

Before anyone could object, Cassandra had dragged Daniel out into the warm sunlight, and out into the heart of Sunnydale.

"Where are we going?" Daniel asked, bewildered.

"To see Spike."

8 8 8

**(Well? Like that? Little button...)**


	16. Shouldn't be here

**Chapter 14: Shouldn't be here**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters except for Mia, Bryan, Daniel, and Cassandra. Joss Whedon owns all of the others.**

**Rating: PG 13. I promise. At least I'm not planning anything above it. There might be some harsh language, a bit of violence, and a few 'references', but nothing above kissing is going to be described without warning.**

**(Hey! Chapter 14, finally. Now, for all those who love a Spike/Dawn friendship, I promise you, it's definitely coming. And I know that some of you will cry out in outrage at the pet name that Spike gives Cassandra, but trust me, Nibblet and Little Bit will be saved for Dawn without reservations. Oh, and thanks so much, Red Wulf and Spikelovesme, for your reviews! I'm updating for you. :)**

**That said, I hope you enjoy:) )**

**8 8 8**

"You shouldn't be here."

The simple sentence floated through the crypt before they'd even taken a step inside, and Daniel started.

"How does he do that?" he hissed in her ear.

"Vampire, remember?" Spike appeared from the shadows, a smirk dancing across his features as Daniel got another shock. It widened slowly, languorously. "Or… did you forget?"

He recovered quickly, however. "I'm not afraid of you, you know," he said calmly as they stepped inside and then shut the door, cutting off the beams of sunlight seeking to burn Spike's pale skin.

"Hmph," Spike turned away, and hoisted himself onto the sarcophagus again. "You are. A little bit."

"How…?"

Spike tapped one slender, pale finger against his nose. "I can smell it. Just a little thread of fear, tightening around your heart, your lungs… you should be more afraid, though. Creature of darkness, I am. Evil…"

"Yeah, you just keep telling yourself that," Daniel returned, as he walked around the crypt, looking intently at everything. "I thought you said that his crypt was really nice."

"Pardon?" Spike sat up incredulously.

"Well, I like the candles," Cassandra said quietly. Daniel shook his head, half-amused, half-exasperated. Cassandra seemed to swing in between the two extremes of assertiveness and absolute shyness. It appeared she was in a the latter mood at the moment.

"Like candles, do you?"

She moved to one, and slowly reached out a hand, stroking the hard wax surface in awe. _God, I'm an idiot, getting so excited over being in Spike's crypt. I can't believe I'm touching his candles…!_

_Oh God, that sounded really, really dumb._

Cassandra cringed inwardly, wondering if anyone present could read her thoughts, but both Daniel and Spike just appeared to be looking at her, rather amused. "S-sorry."

"No need," he threw his hands around expansively. "Touch all the candles around you want. Hell, I've got more downstairs. You like Paraffin?"

"Prefer beeswax," she admitted.

"Got a stash of both. What scents?"

As Spike led them downstairs into his sanctuary, Daniel smiled sardonically as he watched Cassandra stroking various candles with awe. "How ironic you picked up on her favourite hobby so quickly."

"Favourite hobby, eh?" the vampire cocked an eyebrow at him. "Collecting candles?"

"Yeah. She's obsessed with them."

"They're pretty," Spike shrugged.

Daniel slid a sideways glance at him, and then burst out laughing.

"What, Junior?"

"Junior?"

"Never learnt your names," Spike kicked at a rat that had stumbled in from the sewer entrance. "Junior'll do you."

"Oops," Cassandra mumbled, as a few candles toppled over. "Sorry!"

"Careful, Platelet," Spike advised. "You wouldn't want those things catching, would you?"

She almost knocked over more candles as she heard him, and had to try very hard not to flush with pleasure. _Junior and Platelet. He's already out with the pet names. That's a good thing… right?_

"Sorry…" she stammered again.

"No need. Just as long as you don't give me a reason to bite your heads off. There's nothing much to burn here, anyway."

Cassandra leant back and studied the vampire thoughtfully. She remembered the Spike of Season Four. Then, his façade had barely even cracked. Cockiness and arrogance had enveloped him in a protective shield just as surely as his leather duster had. But now? She could almost sense he was confused, and was swinging between acting completely tough in his 'Big Bad' mode, and relaxing to let the thoughts chase themselves across his features.

"What are you looking at, Platelet?"

"You," she replied immediately. "I can't seem to figure you out. Never… never really expected you to help them."

"Neither did I, until I found out Adam was going to dust me," he replied shortly. He slumped against the wall. "Come on, go back to the Watcher's, Junior, Platelet. Shouldn't be hanging out with an evil, soulless demon."

The bitter, self-mocking tone in his voice hit both of them. "If it's okay, I wouldn't mind staying here for a while," Daniel said cautiously. "I'm kinda new to all of this, if you get me."

Spike was still slumped against the wall with his eyes closed, only now he had a cigarette between his lips. "What, new to the world of demons and Hellmouths? I never would have thought that."

"Surprise, surprise," Daniel retorted, nearly matching the phenomenal amount of sarcasm that had dripped from Spike's words.

"Huh," Spike took a deep drag. "I like you. Better than the Whelp, anyway. Not enough guys 'round here. We're being swamped."

"Pardon?" Daniel asked, startled.

Spike inhaled even more smoke, if it was possible, and it was only then that Cassandra realized his hands were shaking. He seemed to blurt out his next words. "Just that it's good to have company 'sides the Slayer and her Scoobies and the…"

They heard the crypt door bang open with a bang, and a hideous roar rent the air to shreds.

"… demons…"

Daniel leapt up almost immediately to run to Cassandra's side, but Spike merely took another breath of cigarette smoke and sauntered up the ladder. Cautiously, they followed him… only to see Spike crash into the crypt wall when they finally reached the upper level, trying to keep to the shadows for protection.

Spike jumped to his feet, laughing, and they saw none of the hesitancy and sudden vulnerability that had swept over him before. Now, he was Spike the vampire, killer of two vampire slayers, and he was loving it.

"Come now, Kraggy," he grinned. "That's no way to great an old friend."

"Friend?" the 'Kraggy' demon asked ominously as it stepped up even closer, sending a fetid wave of over-fragrant scent towards them. "You've allied yourself with the Slayer, Spike. We all heard about it, and now we know, because you're stinking hide isn't dead yet, and at least fourscore demons saw you in her house!"

"Well, a bloke has to keep his friends," Spike stamped out the cigarette that had flown from his mouth at contact with the demon's fist. "Their enemies, too. Ah… the good times we had…"

"No longer matter," Kraggy's eyes were slits. "You betrayed us, Spike. A lot of us were killed in Adam's downfall."

"Your fault for shacking up with the guy in the first place."

"You did too," the demon countered.

"Yeah, but when I realized that he was going to kill me, I buggered off," Spike returned pleasantly. "You, of all demons, can't blame me for that one."

"You still didn't have to ally yourself with the Slayer," Kraggy shot back. "My brother died by her hand. I'm thinking taking your head off right now will go a long way to…"

He stopped.

He sniffed.

His eyes fell on them.

"Humans," he growled. "You're harbouring _humans_!"

Daniel deliberately placed himself between Cassandra and the tall, hairy demon. "Back off," he enunciated slowly. "We were just paying a visit. None of this is anybody's fault."

The demon ignored him. "You're harbouring humans? Even allying with the Slayer against us and betraying Adam, but this? Not even special…"

Kraggy obviously decided at that moment that he'd talked more than enough, and with a roar, rushed at them. Before they had time to react, he was upon them.

And it was one big world of _"What the hell…!"_ to them when he went for Daniel and Cassandra.

She hadn't know that she could react so quickly, but Daniel was still standing like an obstinate mule in front of the big demon barrelling towards them. And if he stayed that way, he probably wouldn't live to learn the rules of life on the Hellmouth. Surprisingly, amazing clarity flowed through her. _I'm not a superhero like Buffy, or a vampiric good guy like Spike. Therefore… best option is to duck and run._

Kraggy slammed into the same wall he'd thrown Spike against, and because of the speed of his run, it was over within seconds. Spike leapt, with his vampiric speed and grace. A few muffled punches, and Spike returned the favour and threw the demon across the room, to land in a puddle of sunlight. Somehow, Cassandra knew that it was deliberate.

"Get out of here, Kraggy," Spike's voice was completely cold and emotionless now, and she shuddered. "I'm letting you go now because of what happened to your family. But come anywhere near here again, and I'll rip out your guts and strangle you with them. And you know full well that that's a promise."

Slowly, the great demon nodded, and then vanished outside.

Spike righted a piece of furniture that had been knocked over.

"Spike, thank…"

"Just go."

"But…"

"Go."

And then, his eyes hooded, he climbed down the ladder and vanished, leaving them standing together, chilled by the bitterness in his tone.

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

_How could I explain it to you?_

_Children._

_Yeah, yeah, I know better now. Don't soddin' push it! But for Christ's sake, I'd had almost enough! Whistler poppin' round in the morning had been a big enough shock, an' then those traitorous little words that seeped under my skin and prodded my heart to see if it still wasn't beating. Thought I'd be able to relax in my crypt, I did. Figure it all out. Just who'd the bloody lot think they were? And, more importantly, who'd they think **I** was? After all, I wasn't a bleedin' white hat! Why were they foisting everything on **me? **_

_For that matter, I still don't understand why everything happened the way it did._

_That's why I said those words._

"_You shouldn't be here."_

_Yeah. Really shouldn't have. In a graveyard of a traitor vampire, on the Hellmouth… all of them. Just two normal kids._

_Ach! I know, I know._

_But for some reason, it made me slightly happier, see? Only ones to treat me like a human that day. Only Joyce and Nibblet… or at least the false memories of Nibblet, had ever done that before._

_I'll… just shut up now._

_Don't feel much like talking._

8 8 8


	17. Stormy Days

**Chapter 15: Stormy Days**

**Disclaimer: I do own nada. Unfortunately. As my name is not Joss Whedon, I cannot claim anything in this fic except for Mia, Bryan, Cassandra and Daniel. Sigh**

**Rating: IthinkI'm boring everyone to death repeating the same thing each time. See the first fourteen chapters if you haven't, yet :)**

**A/N (Ach! Sorry for taking so long to update. Couple of tests I had to scrape past first. :). Still, I've got more time now, so hopefully next time won't take nearly as long.**

**By the way, guys, I'd love to hear some of your ideas I can include in this situation. Two humans from our world in the mad and glorious dimesion that is the Buffyverse! So many possibilities! Come on, I want to hear 'em. :)**

**That said, I hope you enjoy:) )**

**8 8 8**

The second that Buffy said they were going to the beach to enjoy the brilliant weather, Cassandra knew that Dracula was coming.

And, of course, she had to wonder at the timing.

The days had languidly turned hotter, bathing Sunnydale in the heat that gave the small, deadly town its name. The sun beat down on them almost constantly, and whenever Daniel and Cassandra went to visit Spike, he complained about it. Loudly. Cassandra often found excuses to drag Daniel to Spike's crypt without the others' knowledge. Despite Spike's groaning, she understood Dawn when she had said she felt safe there. Spike had a way of spinning marvellous ghost stories that would leave even Daniel shivering.

After the initial burst of research brought on by their arrival, everyone had tired and bored of it except for Giles. When Anya pointed out the fact that since Daniel and Cassandra had brought the prophecy with them, it would be a fairly new one and therefore not documented, Giles deflated. As such, Buffy managed to get them out of the house to go on a shopping spree with Tara and Willow for clothes. It was decided that they stay with Giles despite his protests for the time being, although they really spent more time on Revello Drive with Buffy and Joyce.

As for Cassandra, she was in the literal seventh heaven. Buffy was her idol. Back on her own earth dimension, posters had adorned her walls and action figures had stood from almost every available platform, bought by money she had painstaking scraped together. She took some time to get over staring after Buffy adoringly with puppy eyes, and it took Buffy herself to joke uncomfortably that 'you know, apart from the whole saving the world job, I _am_ human' to get her to snap out of it.

Daniel found everyone to be every bit as kind, intelligent, gentle, compassionate, understanding, and plain funny as Cassandra had described. He and Xander struck up a friendship almost instantly, Daniel matching his dry sardonic wit to Xander's cheery one. He also had a mutual bond of growing respect with Giles. He admired the Watcher for his vast knowledge and acute insight, while Giles was forced to respect his cool-headedness and his uncanny maturity for his age. Things had really been going quite well as they'd settled in, surprisingly. There had been no more visits from delegates of the Powers, and everyone accepted that Cassandra and Daniel had a part to play, even though Cassandra had somehow known that now was not the time to tell all that she knew. Somehow, she had to help them through without telling them about the T.V series back on her dimension. So they were like normal teenagers, hanging out with the Scoobies as they adjusted to this demon-filled, magic-run world.

When Olivia came, they moved to the guest room at Revello, and while Buffy patrolled, they laughed with Willow and Tara, or listened secretly to Joyce and Spike conversing over cups of hot chocolate. They also found that they had created identities that the Powers had thoughtfully provided them with.

_That_ had been quite amusing.

"He's an illegitimate child of my uncle's sent to study here with my mentor… the _librarian_… Rupert Giles!" Xander protested. "Come on! That's ridiculous! No-one's going to buy that!"

"She's my cousin?" Willow asked in disbelief. "I don't have any cousins with black hair!"

"So why are they staying at _my_ house if they're _your_ random relatives?" Giles complained.

Their identities also provided them with a place at Sunnydale Junior, Year 8. Of course, as it was the holidays at the moment, they didn't attend.

Of course, this bliss couldn't last forever.

8 8 8

Dracula had been at the start of Season Five. And Season Five was a year after Season Four. Not… three months.

Something was happening, and it was completely screwing up the time system that Cassandra had made up in her head. She'd thought that they'd at least have half a year to settle in to life on the Hellmouth. It was still hard, waking up in the morning in a foreign bed, one hand searching for a nonexistent alarm to shut it off automatically, one hand seeking the comfort that the soft toy monkey always lent her in the mornings.

As stupid as it sounded, she missed Cheeky.

Cassandra was one for meticulously planning, but she also knew that mainly, the only reason she did so was to further her procrastinating. And now…? Oh gods. This was dumb. She'd foregone the beach to go to Spike's… and had suddenly realized something.

Dawn was coming today.

Oh Gods, Dawn was coming today!

Buffy did a victory dance in her beach sari. "Hah! Touchdown. Oh yeah! Go Team me!"

Riley laughed. "Anybody ever tell Team You the quarterback throws like a girl?"

Buffy caught the ball, frowning. "I do?"

Xander, Anya, Willow and Tara lounged on the beach, watching them. Xander sighed. "I'm exhausted just looking at those two. All the splashing and jumping and running... Shouldn't relaxing involve less exertion?"

"Absolutely," Anya agreed, smiling. "Exertion can lead to sweatiness."

"Which can cause the pain and heartbreak of stinkiness," Tara chuckled. "Better to just stay put."

Willow grinned at that. "I think we've just put our finger on why we're the sidekicks."

They watched as Buffy and Riley approached, sprayed with water and sand and laughs. "What, Game over?" Willow asked innocently..

"Uh, Buffy slayed the football," Riley threw the deflated ball aside.

"Where my burger?" Buffy queried.

"Yeah, man, I'm starving. Cow me."

Xander sighed again. "The, uh, fire's not cooperating. It's comforting to know that I lack the culinary finesse of a caveman."

Willow gestured at the flames. "_Ignis incende."_

The beach fireplace burst in a sudden whoosh of flame, causing Xander to fly backwards in shock onto the sand. Buffy grinned admiringly as Tara and Willow shared a look. "Willow, check you out! Witch-fu."

"It's no big," Willow said modestly. "You just have to balance the elements so when you affect one, you don't wind up causing... "

A huge clap of thunder decided at that moment to interrupt as dark clouds dissolved out of nowhere, and began to pelt them with rain. Everyone leapt up, shrieking, and Xander and Tara began frantically gathering up their stuff to run to shelter.

"I didn't do it! I didn't do it!" Willow yelped.

8 8 8 8 8

"Spike! Spike!"

Spike snapped awake as the crypt door came crashing open. He growled irritably under his breath. When would Platelet and Junior _realize_ that vampires slept in the day!

"Spike! Please!"

Not that he'd ever tell them he enjoyed these little visits. Oh no… he hadn't seen the Scoobies for a _looooong_ time. Not since that little incident when they'd accused him of lying. He wasn't really too keen to face them again, either. But the relationship that was building between the three of them meant more to him than he'd care to admit. They'd come here when the Watcher was on another research spree. Cassandra would sometimes talk about candles, her eyes fixed on him full of admiring adoration. He'd scare them with his massacres when the candles grew dim. Daniel would lean back, observing with sarcastic comments how it amazing it was that nothing had been set on fire yet. Spike'd never told Daniel this, but the instant Kraggy had leapt in an knocked some realizations into his head and then started on the humans, Spike had begun to harbour a grudging respect. Not many boys his age would move so automatically to protect someone in front of a raging Jok'lar demon. And firm and unwavering loyalty always commanded Spike's respect.

"Spike! Are you there?"

"Where else would I be, Platelet?" Spike started getting worried. He pulled some jeans on and a shirt before Cassandra came barrelling down the ladder.

"Oh, thank God," Cassandra sighed, collapsing against the crypt wall. It was only then that he noticed she was completely soaking.

"What's wrong, Platelet?" Spike asked.

"Buffy and the Scoobies are in danger!"

He looked at her incredulously. "And I should care… why?"

"Come on, Spike," she pleaded. "I know you've changed. Giles told me the enjoining spell…"

"Giles knows jack all," Spike retorted roughly, before climbing back into bed. "And you've got to remember Platelet, as much as I'm fond of you and Junior coming around, I owe the Scoobies _nothing_. Hell, if you told me they were all sitting around in the Watcher's living-room with their throats ripped out, I'd probably dance for joy and then run out to enjoy the sight."

Cassandra had, however, zeroed in one thing.

"You like having Daniel and I come around?" she asked shyly.

Spike groaned in frustration at his careless slip. "Argh! Alright, so what if I do?" he thrust out his jaw pugnaciously. "Maybe I just like the sound of your heartbeats and the rushing blood and the fact that, if it weren't for this chip, you'd have been dinner ages ago."

"Oh yeah," Cassandra felt some of Daniel's sarcasm seep into her. "Like you really talk to me about candles and scare us with ghost stories because you think of us as dinner."

Spike opened his mouth, and then closed it. Then opened it again. "Nah, I'm just spooking you in anticipation of the fear I'll taste in your blood. Makes it go down all smooth, you know?"

Cassandra shrunk back, suddenly wishing she'd gone to Revello Drive and gotten Daniel before she came. Spike was… scaring her.

"S-stop," she stuttered softly. "Look, I only want your help because it's Dracula."

"Dracula!" he demanded in disbelief, and then began to laugh. She relaxed slightly. This was kinda how his reaction had been… hadn't it?

"Dracula? Soddin' poof owes me eleven pounds, he does. What's this about my old rival?"

"You were… old rivals." She remembered.

"Well, yeah," he mistook the statement for a question. "Until of course, he got too big for us with his legends and his castles and his stupid gypsy tricks. Why?"

"He's come to Sunnydale. For Buffy."

"And I should help… why?"

Gotta keep up the Big Bad image. Gotta keep up the Big Bad image. Gotta keep up the Big Bad image…

"Because…" Cassandra cast around for an idea. Then her face lit up. "Because, if you're old rivals, then you won't want Dracula to kill Buffy! Because it'll just prove he's better than you, 'cos you could never do it yourself!"

Spike narrowed his eyes at her. "Why do I get the sense I'm being manipulated, Platelet?"

She gave a weak smile of relief. "So, you'll help?"

Spike snorted. "Of course."

Cassandra ran and impulsively hugged him. "Thank-you! Oh, thank-you, Spike!"

"Only to show the bugger who's boss," Spike tried to sound sour, but failed. "Poncy bastard's thrall doesn't do anything on yours truly…"

He remembered she was completely saturated.

"Platelet… did you just run through the storm?"

She nodded.

"You are never, never, NEVER coming to my crypt when it's cloudy again! D'you hear me, Platelet? Never! Not even if bloody SATAN is knocking around for a cup of tea!"

"B-but… why?"

"Are you bloody thick!" Spike half-roared. "Vamps can come out now! They could have wrung your pretty neck in seconds…"

"What, and you wanted to save that for yourself?"

Spike sighed. "Now, Platelet. You know I was joking. Look, you'd better go back to the Watcher's, anyway. I'll walk you back, to make sure no nasties will take a bite before I do."

"Yeah, joking, huh?"

Spike laughed. "Y'know, you should really get away from Junior more. He steals all of your sarcasm."

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

"Cassandra, good lord, what are you doing?"

"Standing out here and getting very wet, Watcher. What does it look like?"

"Spike," Giles realized guardedly.

Spike sauntered in, pulling arrogance around him like his leather duster. "Found the crazy bint walking through the graveyard to my crypt," he announced. "Think she forgot that vamps can walk under clouds."

"Sorry," Cassandra muttered, looking away.

"And what?" Giles was still shaken. Last time he'd seen Spike was… well… last time he'd heard of Spike was when Buffy came back, bloodstained, curtly telling everyone she'd fixed the problem. "You, being the all around good fellow that you are decided to escort her back?"

"Yeah," Spike agreed with much aplomb. "And got something for that Watcher brain of yours to wrap around too."

"And what might that be?" Giles shut the door. "Cassandra, you're soaking. Go dry yourself off, won't you? I'm sure you'll find _plenty_ of clothes around."

Spike laughed at Giles' sour face while Cassandra scampered off. "Let me guess, they all had a field day shopping… no, they used your money as well, didn't they?"

"I should never have suggested it," Giles sighed. "Anyway, what is it that you wanted?"

Clear, succinct. "Drac's in town."

Giles polished his glasses. "Pardon me?"

"Dracula's in town. You know… the Count? The big guy? Surely you've heard of him?"

Giles didn't even notice the sarcasm dripping from Spike's tone. "Dear Lord. Dracula's in Sunnydale? How do you know this?"

"Platelet brought it to my attention. Platelet. Y'know the bint you just sent off to get dry?"

Comprehension dawned. "You mean Cassandra? But how did she know?"

"I don't know," Spike realized.

Giles' eyes lit up. "Kendra… they said something about… wait…

'You have been chosen,

Before the death of Time,

To follow the path,

And teach with song and Rhyme'

Perhaps that's what they're talking about!" Giles exclaimed. "To teach with… uh… song and rhyme? Maybe they were referring to…"

"Why don't you just ask her yourself when she comes down?"

"Yes… yes… I should…" Giles mused. "Do you know why Dracula's here?"

"I would say that he wanted closure for the eleven pounds he owes me, but I know that's not true," Spike snorted. "All I know is that there's been stories. I had a bit of a sniff around during the storm before Platelet came. Everyone knows Drac here, because of course, his legend is _infamous_…"

"Please, stay on topic."

Spike glared at him. "I was getting there. Anyway, it's been whispered that Drac's spent the last couple of years hunting for the Slayer… ever since the Acathla incident. Came to Sunnydale while the Slayer was off wherever she was, but couldn't find her. He's probably tracked her down again to here. Chances are, it's not to say hello."

"Dracula's hunting Buffy…"

"Shock, isn't it?

_Shock, isn't it?_

_Yeah, it sure as hell was. NOT_.

Cassandra drew the towel around her as she listened to the voices drift from below. And knowing with a sudden growing terror that she could potentially stuff this all up.

_Spike never helped out with Dracula. Buffy had done fine all by herself. What if Spike changed that?_

_And what if it were her fault?_

_Suddenly, with a dizzying clarity, she realized that she could make or break everything. That was whoever the Powers' spokesperson had been talking about. She was a seer in this world, or could easily pretend she was. And her lies, or her truths, would or could do something disastrous._

_Dammit!_

8 8 8

**(What'd you think? R&R :))**


	18. Drac

**Chapter 16: Drac**

**Disclaimer: No ownership. It's so sad… the only things I own are Bryan, Mia, Cassandra and Daniel… and from what you've seen of Bryan and Mia, would you even _want_ to own them?**

**Rating: I think I'm boring everyone to death repeating the same thing each time. See the first fourteen chapters if you haven't, yet :)**

**A/N (Celestia Nailo! This one's for you! Thank you very much for your review. I'm sorry that I didn't update earlier, but I was in the middle of an ideas-fest about how to sort out the next couple of chapters and write Riley's leaving well. So yes. Here's Chapter 16 : ). I'm glad you like it so far.**

**By the way, people, because my fic is set in an Alternate Universe that kind of skews majorly off before Primeval, Faith also has not yet woken from her coma and done the body-swapping. You'll see why later… :).**

**Also, like I said before, I'd love to hear some of your ideas I can include in this situation. Two humans from our world in the mad and glorious dimension that is the Buffyverse! So many possibilities! Come on, I want to hear 'em. :). )**

8 8 8

Breathe… I need to breathe…

Dracula. Yeah, sure, Spike and Giles and Riley had argued and harangued over stupid moot points and then argued some more over others for the entire day. It had taken me a while to actually get used to seeing them all in the same room having what could be considered a civilized discussion. After Riley had initially erupted over Spike being there in the first place, he eventually calmed down enough to start the arguing. Finally, they came up with something none of them agreed on to give to me. A full list of Dracula dos and don'ts. And a little character study of him too. Yay. But actually seeing the guy?

Breathing. Breathing good. Breathing means I'm alive.

Yeah, with the whole dark, penetrating eyes… I don't think I lied very convincingly. Poor Riley. Mind you, he didn't need to get a big case of the jealousies… right? I'm surprised Spike stayed silent. He of the running mouth and getting into trouble and me having to punch him thing. Of course, he did arch his eyebrow, and that in itself spoke volumes. It felt like he knew exactly what I'd felt. And those blue eyes of his did some penetrating of their own…

No! Dammit! Why am I thinking about Spike! And with the penetrating… eww…

Damn, I am tired, though. It's funny, the last couple of nights, I haven't been able to sleep. Even with Riley. I don't know… but it's like I'm… not… fulfilled? Like I'm a part…

Oh, right. The spell.

Anyway, for some reason, I believe I'm actually falling asleep now. It's strange. Why can I sleep better without Riley? No… that's not it. It's just I'm so…

8 8 8

"You are magnificent…"

_Oh god. _

I cleared my throat. Bit my tongue. "I bet you say that before you bite all the girls."

He shook his head, those dark penetrating eyes driving into my very soul. But what would he know of a soul? "No, you are different. Kindred."

"Kindred?" I snorted. "Hardly, I…"

"Pull your hair back."

The rest of it passed in a blur. I don't know what I was doing. Yes, now I know I was under thrall, but it felt strange.

Everyone knows my will has always been my own, right? I listen to Giles politely, and then do what I want anyway? Well… that's only partly true. I respect them. And I love them like hell. My friends… if it matters to them enough, I will change. Really.

But my will has never been subverted before. And it was wrong. It screamed inside me that it was wrong. Every muscle fibre wanted to stake the hell out of Dracula, no matter his stupid eyes.

Words drifted out at me.  
"I have searched the world…"

Yeah, well, stupid idiot, I've been here all the while. Stop controlling me!

"I have yearned for you…"

And you don't even know me. Sicko.

Hey, even I cringe at my thoughts sometimes. I know, I know… that just wasn't funny…

"For a creature whose darkness rivals my own."

What!

"You have been tasted."  
He traced the scars that the Master and Angel had left. I always wondered why they tingled like that. The memories of the pain…

I finally got my mouth working. "He was…"

"Unworthy... "

And then the strongest compulsion of all. _Do not fight._ I think I knew somewhere that he'd said it out loud, but I heard it, reverberating in my head.

And then he bit me.

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

Being under thrall isn't really all it's cracked out to be. For the first time since the spell, I felt completely alone. Yeah, fine, I was in this floaty and generally comfortable place while I did weird things like cover up the bite when I wanted to go out and scream at Giles, Spike and Riley that all of their information and failed to protect me. I still didn't understand why Spike was helping, but I wasn't really complaining at that point. Not when he was the only one who noticed something was up with me and ripped the scarf off my neck two seconds after I stepped through the door.

"Well Slayer?" his eyes glittered dangerously. "What's this all about?"

Riley immediately leapt up and glared accusingly at me. "That's it! You're under the thrall of the Dark Prince!"

"I am not under the thrall of the Dark Prince!" I protested.

"The hell you are," Spike snorted before anyone could say anything else. "Let me guess, the bastard paid you a little visit last night and said some crap about how he yearned for you and then told you not to fight him because he knew that you wanted it?"

How does he _do_ that?

"Something like that," I muttered, before my mouth took on a will of its own. "It seemed a little more romantic."

"Romantic?" Riley almost had a heart attack. "She's really under his thrall, isn't he?"

"No, I'm fine, Riley," I took his hand, looking up earnestly at him. "Really, I'm your girl."

He looked away from me. "Well, I guess I shouldn't be jealous. I mean, after that thing with Angel, how could I expect it not to transfer to…?"

"No! It is not a transferry thing!" I cried out. "It's not that at all! I'm _your_ girl, and I'm going to stay that way.""

Looking back at it now, I think we were both trying too hard at that point. Of course, I didn't see it then. Xander made his offer, and then he took me to Dracula.

Then I tasted his blood.

_Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud._

It was a silent scream in time to the heartbeat and the blood. The First Slayer… the… the _hunting_ that Dracula and Spike had both called it. The… killing.

_Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud._

And unbidden, words came to me.

_Flying through the darkness with the staid unearthly grace,_

_Wrapped in pale nightfall and surmounted with cold lace,_

_Primeval in its hunting and primordial in strength,_

_Blood sprayed through the gleaming blade to run down metal length_

And my heartbeat kept drumming. Fell into the words and mixed like a rhythm to a beat.

_Quintessential fire from the depths of demon spirit,_

_Exultation surging forth from all who fight and fear it,_

_Joined from one then rent inside to parley different sides,_

_Two leaders of two armies to forever fight in pride_

_Yet then the rules are broken in the hidden, priceless soul,_

_That single one that blazes bright though others burn to coal,_

_Proven once and then again past he they thought would be,_

_Never knowing what his worth until too late to see_

_Fire burning fire burning life and warmthandblood,_

_Fire burning fire to riseloyalty above,_

_Fire burning fire for the crimson sea of mud,_

_Fire burning fire most of all in deeper love_

_Crimson river, crimson tide,_

_Crimson love to those confide,_

_Crimson life and crimson soul,_

_Crimson blood and crimson fall_

And with that, I felt everything return to me. And more. With a rush, I felt power so strong that I grasped at it hungrily with another gulp of blood.

And then, I sent him flying halfway across the room.

"That was gross," I declared. "But thanks. Kinda broke the hold."

He glared at me disbelievingly. "What is this!"

"My true nature," I grinned. "Want a taste?"

"Come," he hissed. "Come to me."

"Look, I really think the _thrall_ has gone out of our relationship,"

I moved towards him, but I hadn't expected him to be so goddamned _fast_. He moved like lightning, punching me. I retaliated.

Left kick, swipe. Block. Punch, drive, spin kick, headbutt…

He battered into me, and my eyes rolled involuntarily from the pain. Why the hell hadn't they warned me Drac could actually _fight_?

Oh wait. Spike had. Repeatedly.

He lunged at me again with an exultant, insane look in his eyes. I scissor-kicked him away and then leapt up, my blood rushing. I attacked as well as I could, landing at least eight stinging blows before he pushed me off balance again. The fierce energy lancing through me distracted me, and then I was crashed on the table, looking to see his fangs descending on me… and then promptly hauled away.

_Spike._

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

Spike pulled Dracula off Buffy just as he was about to sink his fangs into her throat. He hissed, and spun around to face this new attacker. Spike merely smirked cockily.

"Well, well ,well. Old Draccy boy. Long time. No fight. Let's correct that, shall we?"

"Spike," Dracula looked surprised. "What are you doing here?"

"Laughing at your accent."

Spike threw a punch, but Dracula blocked and kicked him hard in the gut. In a whirl of leather, Spike rolled and took the Transylvanian vampire down with him, ending up on top. Gleefully, he began hitting him.

"Remember" Punch. "That" Punch. "Eleven" Punch. "Pounds" Punch. "You" Punch. "Still" Punch. "Owe" Punch. "Me?"

Punch.

"Well guess what?"

Pu…

This time, Dracula regained his senses and clawed Spike in the face and threw him off. Spike sailed halfway across the room to crash into the wall. But Buffy had long recovered. Before Dracula could do anything, she grabbed him by the collar of his blood-red shirt and threw him into the opposite wall, finishing Spike's sentence sweetly.

"I charge interest."

Spike and Buffy's eyes met across the room and they nodded. Together, they ran after Dracula as he leapt up, prepared to meet them. They tagged him mercilessly, one distracting him with a punch, and then the other sailing in with a flying kick, and both melting backwards out of reach before Dracula could retaliate. Slowly, they forced Dracula past the flickering torches to the fire that he had lounged by.

And that was how Riley and Giles found them. Moving in partnership to bring down one of the most legendary vampires the world had ever seen.

In desperation, Dracula faded into mist. Spike and Buffy's eyes followed it as snaked through the air, almost invisible. Simultaneously, they broke into a run. Buffy detoured across to snatch up the stake on the table, so Spike got their first. As Buffy leapt, Dracula coalesced, only to find himself pinned down by his old enemy. Open for Buffy…

And then Buffy's stake drove home.

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

Cassandra knew Dawn had come the instant all of the memories appeared. It was confusing mixed up with her own knowledge of what was happening. She wondered whether anything would change now that she knew…

"Hey Cassandra," Dawn grinned. "When did you come?"

"Just felt like coming," Cassandra shrugged. The memories lent her everything she needed to know. The first time she had stepped into Buffy's house, Dawn had hidden wide-eyed on the stairs while listening to Kendra and Whistler's exposition. She had stayed there as they'd all rushed out for research, but their eyes had met. Later, after visiting Spike and somewhat subdued, they had unconsciously meandered their way back to Revello Drive, and were bombarded by a million questions. Daniel had groaned aloud and vanished as the two began enthusing about the latest boy bands. Cassandra suspected that he had gone to bash his head quietly in the basement. After they had gone down to check on him, the three had instantly struck up a fast friendship.

And all of those memories… fabricated.

"Wanna hang out?" Dawn gestured expansively to her room.

"Okay." Anything to take her mind off what might have happened at Dracula's estate.

They collapsed on the bed with a sigh.

"How are you? I haven't seen you for a day."

"Worried, as usual," Cassandra laughed. "Dracula's after Buffy."

"Dracula?" Dawn's eyes widened. "As in, _the_ Dracula? All long hair and pale face and totally _hot_ Dracula with the cool accent?"

"Just about," she agreed. "Although I'm not so sure about the hot part… y'know, with the lack of body temperature and all," she tried for a laugh.

"You know what I mean," Dawn replied. "Damn, why do the hot guys always go for Buffy?"

Cassandra laughed. "Don't stress Dawn. You're really pretty."

"You think?" Dawn asked hopefully, pushing herself off the bed and moving to the mirror.

"Yeah."

"I wonder…"

"What are you doing here?" Buffy looked at them.

From downstairs, they heard Joyce's voice clearly. "Buffy, if you're going out, why don't you take Dawn and Cassandra with you?"

Cassandra could only smile in amusement as they turned and at exactly the same time, let out a whiny. "Mum!"

8 8 8

**(Well? How did you like that? Tell me!)**


	19. Like a Cat

**Chapter 17: Like a Cat**

**Disclaimer: No ownership. It's so sad… the only things I own are Bryan, Mia, Cassandra and Daniel… and from what you've seen of Bryan and Mia, would you even _want_ to own them?**

**Rating: I think I'm boring everyone to death repeating the same thing each time. See the first fourteen chapters if you haven't, yet :)**

**A/N (Thank-you for your reviews, Dieu Anonyme and Celestia Nailo. : ). I'm posting this new chappie for you guys and the inspiration and drive you gave me to keep going. Dieu Anonyme, thanks for the tip about the anonymous reviewers. I've turned it off. And Celestia Nailo? I'm going to try to incorporate Cassandra into many Spike/Dawn scenes, but just enough so that Dawn can still develop her special relationship with Spike. Does that sound good: )**

**And I know that I've said this before, but… ideas! Ideas are of the good!And so are reviews! So thanks to all those who have reviewed!)**

8 8 8

"Can't we just say we had a late night?" Dawn tried hopefully.

They hadn't even made it to Dawn's room, where the two sleeping bags were assembled on either side of the bed. Instead, Cassandra and Dawn had fallen asleep together on the couch facing the television, while Daniel had finally surrendered to night's call in the comfortable old armchair. Bleary eyed and half-awake, Dawn was pleading for their very lives.

"I mean, people like Janice do it all the time," Dawn continued. "And the teachers let them!"

"Except you lot are not Janice, and I am most definitely not Janice's mother," Joyce rationalized. "Come on. Up to school. You've got twenty minutes before Xander comes."

"Xander's coming?" Daniel queried. "I thought… ah… he might not have gotten over his little experience."

Dawn snickered and Cassandra giggled, remembering Spike's view on the thrall Dracula had held over Xander, and the insect-eating madman he'd been reduced to. To say the least, his description had been rather colourful. Although, Cassandra had noticed, there seemed to be some sort of begrudging respect in Spike's tone whenever he talked about 'the Whelp' now, that she'd never heard before when he was on screen. She'd already pieced together why.

The spell.

It all came down to the enjoining spell.

"Yes, Xander's coming," Joyce bustled around in the kitchen. "And he'll be here soon! So come on, into your uniforms."

With many a groan, Cassandra, Dawn and Daniel stumbled upstairs to Dawn's room, ferreting around in the mess they had made the previous day. Daniel surveyed the room with a wry smile.

"Hey, looks like a cyclone came through."

"Wait… and how is that different from the way everything normally is?" Dawn laughed.

As they finally threw everything together, and trooped downstairs, they heard voices from below.

"And this here's for you, Mrs. Summers," Xander said grandly. There seemed to be a new lilt to his voice, and Cassandra recognized it immediately. Confidence. Power. Assurance.

"Why thank you, Xander," Joyce sounded genuinely delighted. "This is so sweet of you! What's the occasion?"

"As if I need an occasion to thank the mother of my best friend of all of the good care that she's ever given us," they could almost hear him wink.

"Thank-you," Joyce repeated, beaming. "And I think it's wonderful that you and Anya have such a beautiful place to live in now."

"Hey," the Slayer herself stood on the stairway, smiling. "Had a good night last night?"

They grinned back. "It was awesome," Dawn enthused. "Movie marathon!"

"On a school night," Buffy rolled her eyes. "But then, I can't say anything, I guess. So… what movies did you watch?"

"Mean Girls, Mona Lisa Smile, and Legally Blonde," Daniel groaned.

"My God," Xander laughed as he appeared at the foot of the staircase. "How did you survive?"

"I don't know," Daniel replied honestly. "I think all feeling left my body half an hour in."

They had to giggle at that, while Dawn playfully shoved him against the banister. "You didn't seem to have too many problems with them while we were watching."

"Appearances can be deceiving."

"Hey," Xander interrupted smoothly. "I hate to have to break off this conversation, but as I'm head of the School Express, I decree that you have five minutes to eat your breakfast before you're off."

"Five minutes?" Cassandra asked. "But we usually have to go straightaway when you're here."

Something seemed awake in her mind, and a startling image jumped into her mind of a demon with glowing lava seeping from below cracks in his skin.

Xander winked at her. "That's why I came early to accommodate the movie-fest."

The mental messages flying around the room almost made the air thicken as everyone silently gaped at each other. _Xander **never** comes early._

"Okay, another apocalypse is on the way," Buffy leaned against the banister as she reached the only conclusion possible.

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

Sunnydale Junior was a medium affair, cloaked in sandstone and granite that belied the brick and wood within the solid walls. The library was nowhere near as large as the one that used to reside in Sunnydale High, but at least there was one. Cassandra had already spent several hours browsing through the books there, joyfully devouring them despite the nasty snickers behind her back about how much of a geek or a nerd she was. Their locker area coincided nicely with the corridor leading to the archive of books, making her, if possible, even happier.

Corridors interlinked the many standard classrooms, the buzzing of fluorescent lights accompanied by the click-clacking of high heels as secretaries, parents, and teachers ran around in a haphazard race to reach their next destination. Outside, the lawn stretched past a sports field, various leaning greenery lending gentle shade on crafted wooden benches. Brick finished off the outside in tessellated paths bordering concrete that snaked their way from the gym to the Science Block on the other side of the school.

However, there was no difference in the classes. Led by the same boring teachers that had once officiated at Sunnydale High and who recovered from the traumatisation several events had imposed on them, they were reduced to sleeping off the long lectures about safety interspersed by Mathematics, English, and Science.

They liked everything else. Really they did. Daniel and Dawn both enjoyed Maths, even though Cassandra loathed it. That was the only subject that they were divided on. But today, their normal Maths teacher Miss. Elliott was away. And the substitute was mangling the art of numbers.

"And so, if the parabola is upwards, it means that the equation must be positive. If the parabola is downwards, it means that the coefficient of the squared 'x' must be negative. Does everyone understand?"

When no one answered because half of them were asleep, Mr. Braxton assumed that they all understood and continued. As boredom seeped into students and turned off their brains, Daniel instead felt restless.

He didn't want to admit it, but last night, between the movies, when Cassandra and Dawn had talked about common events on the Hellmouth, he had felt a chill creep down his spine, accompanied quickly by a rush of anticipatory terror. He hadn't even seen Spike go into game-face yet, so he had no idea what they were talking about. And he'd seen 'Kraggy', but in the dark light of Spike's crypt. And then, he'd been concentrating more on instinctively protecting Cassandra. Other than that, the only time he'd even seen a demon was the first day when they had clumsily avoided the demon and followed Buffy, Spike and Xander as they decimated the demon horde to save the soldiers. And then, he was still too busy being in a state of shock to really notice how strong, how powerful and how agile most demons were. And he'd never even glimpsed at the many plots groups of demons, it seemed, were hatching every day to end the world. Or this dimension, at least.

He looked around now. Dawn and Cassandra were swinging their legs beside him, leaning on their elbows. An identical look of pure boredom mixed with tiredness were plastered on both of their faces. He sighed, and wished for the bell to ring soon, even though the minute hand almost seemed to slow down to an inconceivable crawl the second he made the wish. Giving up, he slumped in his chair and closed his eyes.

If the three hadn't been so out of it, they might have seen when a girl in their class turned around to study them. But more importantly, they would have seen her eyes dilating as her irises flushed pure onyx with eldritch flame.

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

At first, Buffy never knew why she sometimes stepped out of the hectic frenzy of her life and into the cool hospital room to see its silent occupant. At first, she wondered if it was regret on her part. There were so many things she could have done differently. So many other paths she could have taken. But now, she knew that it wasn't anything about regret. Okay, fine. Maybe a little. But mostly, it was about… realization. Connection.

Buffy sat on the empty chair next to Faith's bed. The same chair that she always sat in. It saddened her somewhat to realize that she was Faith's only visitor. Slayers. Always alone.

_Except for when there are two of us,_ Buffy added silently in her head. _But even then… so much can go wrong…_

"Hey Faith," Buffy spoke aloud to the prone body. She gathered the lifeless hand in her own warm ones, absentmindedly arranging Faith's hair as she did so. She didn't know why. "You know Adam? That crazy Frankenstein guy I told you about last time? Well… we beat him. First time I ever saw surprise on that sewn-together face of his. It felt really good. I mean, after all, we thought he was like, indestructible. You would have loved to faze him. He was… what did Giles describe him as? Ah yes. Unflappable. If anyone could have fazed him, it would have been you, you know. You would have had fun kicking his ass."

Buffy paused, reliving the spell, before she continued. "We beat him using a spell this time. You know Willow. She's getting better at magic now. It's great. She's got Tara to help her. She'll be so powerful when she's trained up. I guess she already is. And most surprising of all? Spike helped us. I couldn't believe it. The memories that surfaced… afterwards, we accused him of lying. I think he was slightly hysterical by that point from exhaustion. He just got us together and showed us his entire human life. The thing was, Faith, we felt it all. We felt concerned and worried and helpless and afraid for his Mum. She was really sick, see? And we even felt Drusilla's fangs piercing our… his neck. It was way out. Unbelievable."

Buffy closed her eyes as she remembered William's reaction to Cecily, and her heart ached. "Unbelievable," she repeated.

She continued her way back to the present, as the clock counted passed half-an-hour, telling her sister Slayer everything that had happened. She finally found herself talking about Riley.

"I don't know, Faith. Lately he's been kinda distant. Ever since the Dracula incident two days ago. We explained everything about Dracula's thrall. Spike even went so far as to detail Dracula's favourite little games, but Riley punched him once and then stomped away. I wasn't sure whether to follow him or not, and the most puzzling thing was why Spike seemed to be defending me. And they've both been patrolling as well. I don't mind so much when Spike fights with me. I know he's capable of taking care of himself, and lately, he's even stopped a couple of stray hits that would have probably landed on me. But Riley? I know that I'm probably insulting his manhood, but I just don't want him to get hurt. He's still a human, no matter what crap the Initiative pumped into him.

You know, Faith, it used to be great when we went patrolling by ourselves, together. I loved the power of it. The feeling. I think you did too, didn't you?"

Buffy looked at Faith's face. Her eyes flickered in REM, and Buffy knew that somewhere, Faith was dreaming. Yet, she also knew that somewhere, Faith was also listening. Hanging on to her every word.

"I mean, our friendship didn't mean that little to you, did it?" Buffy whispered. "I know I was harsh at the start. But I was more confused. There was like… this connection between us. We're both Slayers, and besides Kendra, I'd never felt that same tingle. It was like you knew about the power inside of me that no-one had ever explained. And we just clicked. Patrolling was almost fun. But then you went away. I know that things were getting bad and you were confused because you killed that man… and I shouldn't have pushed you so much about it. I talked with Giles afterwards, and he said that that was just your way of dealing with it…"

Buffy's eyes suddenly caught the clock, and she gasped. It was quarter to three, and she'd promised her Mum that she would meet Dawn, Cassandra, and Daniel from School and then be picked up by Giles to go to the Magic Box.

"Damn it," she cursed. "I'm sorry, Faith, but I gotta go. I'll come back when I can, though. You know… coming here, talking to you. It grounds me. But… I know you'll wake up."

Buffy stood, and looked sombrely at Faith's still form. "After all, I know something that the doctors don't. And that is that you're a Slayer. And a damned strong one. But before you were a Slayer, you were Faith. And you won't give up. You'll wake up soon, you know. And when you do?"

Buffy sighed, and then leaned over and kissed Faith's forehead. She walked over to the door, and stared back.

"I hope you won't be as confused anymore."

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

The shop was dark and silent. As Buffy entered, a shivery feeling ran up her back, and she instantly tensed. Slayer instincts. She'd ignored them before, and paid the price.

"Well, I think 'odd' just got upped to 'bad.'"

"Hello? Anyone here?" Giles called out.

"Mr. Bogarty?"

They all looked at Tara, and she immediately looked down. "T-the owner," she stuttered. "I-I come in here a lot."

Willow advanced further into the store, looking around carefully. "Well, maybe this happened ... really late at night when nobody was... " she tripped with a squeal.

"Will?"

"I'm fine," Willow sat up. "I-I just tripped over... "

She rolled over and saw. And gulped. "Mr. Bogarty."

Dawn gasped and moved forwards. "Is he okay?"

Buffy pushed her backwards firmly, sudden fear in her eyes. "It's nothing you need to see. Nothing all three of you need to see. Dawn, Cass, Daniel… wait outside."

"But…" Dawn protested, indignant at being excluded.

"Wait outside," Buffy's voice took a dangerous lilt.

As the Magic Box's door closed behind them, Dawn swallowed. Silence seemed to hang around them as the shock settled in.

"He's… he's dead, isn't he?" Dawn said, even though she knew that the others hadn't seen him. "He's… dead."

"Yeah," Cassandra replied quietly. "He is."

"She always does that," Dawn shook her head, a trembling in her voice. "She always shuts me out. But you know, I get more scared just…"

"Whatcha doin'?"

The three of them turned around with a gasp. A man stood behind them, unshaven and his tie loose. Something about the way he carried himself made them step instinctively backwards.

His eyes were insane.

"What are you doing here?" he demanded, advancing on them. "You kids can't loiter. There's no loitering."

He moved even closer, backing them up against a white van. The three of them physically started as they felt the cool metal behind their backs.

"That's why I'm a cat," he explained, that same mad glint in his eyes. "Quiet. See, cat's in the cupboard…" he made a scratching gesture with his hands. "But they find you there anyway, and it hurts…"

Suddenly, he began sobbing noisily. "Please, make it stop! Make it stop…"

Before their shocked eyes, he turned, and terror lined his face as he began shrieking at himself. "Shut up! Shut up! They'll hear you!"

Dawn moistened her dry lips with her tongue. "Buff…" she shrieked as the guy put his finger on her lips. Cassandra reached out and grabbed Dawn's shirtsleeve, pulling her onto the sidewalk again while Daniel remained frozen. Unmoving.

The guy wasn't fazed. He moved even closer towards them, until a sudden realization lit in his eyes.

"I know you," he exclaimed. "Curds and whey. I know what you are."

He pushed Cassandra away onto the concrete and grasped Dawn by the collar. "You ... don't ... belong ... here."

"No…" Dawn shook her head, tears starting to pool in her eyes. "Go… go…"

Daniel finally moved. He yanked the man off and pushed him away, extending his hand to Cassandra in one smooth move. He pulled her up, and then stood defiantly in front of Dawn and Cassandra, glaring.

"Get out of here," he hissed.

The man shook his head violently. "None… none of you…"

For a long time after he vanished, the three stood there like that. Dawn in tears, Cassandra staring, stunned, and Daniel smouldering. Smouldering like fire and ice.

8 8 8


	20. Real Me

**Chapter 18: Real Me**

**Disclaimer: No ownership. It's so sad… the only things I own are Bryan, Mia, Cassandra and Daniel… and from what you've seen of Bryan and Mia, would you even _want_ to own them?**

**Rating: I think I'm boring everyone to death repeating the same thing each time. See the first fourteen chapters if you haven't, yet :)**

**A/N (Thanks a million, Firestar! That review kept me smiling for the rest of the day. And I appreciate your concern. Not going to point any fingers here, but I also do know that there are fics that portray Buffy as a bitch. And I know that the series is called "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" and not "Spike the amazing Vampire" for a reason, so yes. But still… Joss? "Spike the amazing Vampire?" Please?**

**And yes, I'll try to keep going with Buffy and Spike POV parts. I'm glad you're enjoying this: )**

**Oh, and by the way, I apologize profusely for not updating sooner. I have exams in two weeks, now, so I've been kind of busy. I'll probably be updating a little less frequently, but after exams, I promise loads more!)**

8 8 8 8 8 8

"Not me," the vampire, Brad, snarled. "This night is young, and I want some action."

Spike tapped Brad on the shoulder, and when the fledgling turned, he jabbed him neatly in the face, sending him sprawling in the grass. The other three minions turned.

"Happy to oblige," Spike smirked. "Here I thought it was gonna be a slow night. Step on up, kiddies. Thrashings for all."

The minions started forward. But they were halted with Harmony's cry. "Stop!"

"Well…" Spike tried to get over his surprise. "Hello, Harm."

He waded through the pleasantries and the sarcastic, pure evil replies he knew that they expected. In reality, he didn't feel like this verbal exchange at the moment, especially as he was seriously itching for a fight.

Bloody Chip.

Bloody Slayer.

Bloody Hellmouth.

Bloody Unlife.

He'd fought with them at the tip, even though it wasn't nearly enough to hide his embarrassment at them finding him there in the first place. He felt incensed at himself for even caring about their opinions. And then the Whelp had saved the day and the others had left without a backwards glance or even a 'thankyou for going against your very nature to fight with us even though your base instinct is to rip our heads off and drink from our brainstems'.

No-one had manners these days.

And he'd done more. Gone with them to research the damned thing, learnt about the rod and helped them to stop the Whelp from killing himself. Which was good for a snigger, but then he'd heard that little conversation in the car on the way to the fancy apartment. He'd always known when to be quiet so that people forgot he was there. And it had payed off. He got to listen to the entire thing.

And he didn't know why, but it hurt.

"Riley, do you wish…"

"No."

Spike could almost hear the pout in her voice. "No? You don't even know what I was gonna say."

"Yes, I do," Whitebread had answered. "You wanted to know if I wished you got hit by the ferula-gemina, got split in two."

"Well… you have been kind of rankly about the whole slayer gig. Instead of having slayer Buffy, you could have Buffy Buffy."

Captain Cardboard laughed. "Hey. I have Buffy Buffy. Being the slayer's part of who you are. You keep thinking I don't get that, but..."

"It's just…" Buffy trailed off. "I know how ... un-fun it can be. The bad hours, frequent bruising, cranky monsters..."

Idiot had interrupted. Spike knew it was never good to interrupt a lady in one of these conversations unless in specific circumstances. "Buffy... if you led a perfectly normal life, you wouldn't be half as crazy as you are. I gotta have that. I gotta have it all. I'm talkin' toes, elbows, the whole bad-ice-skating-movie obsession, everything. There's no part of you I'm not in love with."

Liar.

If there was one thing Spike knew he could do, it was reading people. It wasn't difficult. Even in his human years he'd begun the process, shyly hiding behind his poetry and watching at the parties, slowly beginning to see the lies that spun around them all but still helplessly trapped by society's thrall. The demon years had perfected it. History knew William the Bloody, the impetuous, fiery vampire that had done what few fledges could and become a Master in the space of just over one hundred years. With the Aurelius blood running through him, he struck an imposing figure, acting with his blood screaming out to him as he massacred. History knew the Slayer of Slayers, as he'd stalked down and fought in epic battles against the killers of his kind.

But history knew nothing about William the Shadow. Of course, it didn't sound nearly as catchy as the others, but it worked. Melting into the darkness, Spike had heard many things with his finely attuned ears. And as he observed, hunted, and stalked his prey, he'd often gone off onto the wayside as his attention was grasped by something else. No-one ever thought that the arrogant and cocky vampire had more weapons in his arsenal than his fist and fangs.

And he knew that the entire conversation had been fraught with lies and tension and unexplained and un-talked about secrets and ruffles that needed to be smoothed out.

But for some reason, it irked him.

Because he knew that, in spite of the last seven months, Captain Cardboard knew jack-all about the Slayer… and the fact that the bastard thought he did made him so angry that…

Harmony's next words, however, pulled him directly from his thoughts.

"Uh huh. I mean ... shut up! We're gonna kill the slayer."

The words rolled from his mouth so smoothly he didn't have to think about them. Which was all very well. Because he was, indeed, furiously thinking at the moment.  
"Singing my song now, are you?" he smirked. "You should pay me royalties for that one, or at least get your own tune."

A few more jibes later, and Harmony's words unwittingly hit him in his undead chest again. "You'll see," she snarked. "Buffy'll be dead by sunrise. I've got a plan."

He switched to autopilot again. "Lemme guess," he chuckled. "Snatch one of her friends, use 'em as bait, lead her into a trap. That sort of thing?"

He could tell she was bluffing as soon as she opened her mouth. "No! Much, much better one."

He did the famous thing with the raised eyebrow and a fitting smirk that he knew pissed everyone off royally.

"I'm not gonna tell you!" she exclaimed.

Spike shrugged, pretending he didn't care. "Thought as much. Best of luck. Let me know how this arch-villain thing works out for you." He turned around and walked off.

"I'll do that!" Harmony shouted after him. "And after Buffy is gone? I'm gonna kill everybody in this town that was ever mean to me ... Spike!"

He waved his hand over his shoulder without even bothering to turn around, knowing it would infuriate her even further. But he stayed close enough to hear her next words drifting on the wind.

"Okay, guys! New plan!"

The itch to fight and his private fuming at Buffy and Riley's conversation forgotten, the vampire sped off into the night, with one thought in his mind. A thought that had leapt there unbidden, and would leap there again many times in the future.

Nibblet.

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

Cassandra went after her friend instantly. Daniel, uncomfortable around feminine distress, stayed with Xander and Anya as they awaited the coming of Buffy and Riley.

"It was a mistake," Dawn said quietly. "She was being so mean to Xander. He's changed. You know, I always thought he had the bad side of things. It's one of the reasons I…"

She paused, and Cassandra finished for her. "Have a crush on him?"

"Yeah," Dawn admitted. "I mean, look at the people like Harmony, lording it over the others because they're popular, and in reality, they're the ones with problems. The people who have to cop their stupidity are always stronger…"

Cassandra looked at her friend carefully. The conversation had started because of Dawn inviting Harmony in accidentally she was sure. But now? It seemed to have veered off onto a whole new tangent.

"It's Kirsty, isn't it?" she asked suddenly, realization spreading forth.

Dawn flushed, and looked away, her silence the only answer that the other needed. After a while, she spoke again.

"Was it that obvious?"

"Kirsty's a bitch," Cassandra said matter-of-factly. "And remember, I was there when she started going all arrogant and stuck-up on us."

Dawn gave a hiccuping laugh, and hugged the startled girl. "Oh Cass. I know it's ridiculous. But it's just… everything seems to be so much all of a sudden. And I really didn't mean to invite Harmony in."

"We know you didn't…"

Cassandra stopped abruptly as she heard Buffy's angry words from downstairs. Dawn's eyes widened, and then, before Cassandra could stop her, she dashed out of the room.

8 8 8

Spike arrived just as Buffy, still fuming, stomped out of the door to find him. He ducked the fist.

"Oi, what's this about?" he demanded, irritated.

"Where's Harmony?" she ground out.

"I came to tell you," he neatly dodged another hit. "She's planning to get one o' your mates 'cos she wants to kill you." He laughed shortly. "Like the bint has any chance of that."

"Where is she?" Buffy asked dangerously. "She's got Dawn!"

_Too late._

_I was too late._

Spike quickly brushed away what sounded scarily like a conscience and composed himself, even though inside, he was screaming. He didn't want to think what that bastard Mort could do to Nibblet…

"Follow me," he began to turn around into the night, but Buffy hauled him backwards by the collar of his duster.

"Why the hell are you here, anyway?" she looked suspicious.

Spike felt the frustration build up in him. Dammit, he was trying to help them, and he had! Many times now… and they still questioned him. The anger built up, but then he remembered what had brought them together in the first place.

Curiosity reigned, and he reached out a hesitant hand to Buffy's shoulder, and concentrated.

Buffy gasped as Spike's feelings and emotions rolled over her in waves as he showed her the conversation between him and Harmony. He struggled to edit out his thoughts, and was surprised when he succeeded. She looked at him, amazed. One look at her face made his insides almost crumple in relief. He'd done it, somehow. She'd only felt his worry for Dawn… wait…

All too late, he regretted showing her that, and he turned and ran to Harmony's lair, following Dawn's terrified scent. Fear soaked through the air, so strong that he winced.

Buffy was disoriented for a moment, and she almost lost the blonde vampire amidst the darkness as she felt the connectedness again. All of a sudden, she craved it. She needed to sit down with Giles, Xander, Willow, and Spike, and slowly knit the bond together again, to create that feeling of wholeness.

But she had Dawn to save first.

8 8 8

"T-touch me and m-my sister's gonna kill you," Dawn backed away as they approached. Of course, considering the cave wall was at her back, all she could really do was squirm closer.

Cyrus smirked, and prodded her with a finger. When nothing happened, they laughed, until Cyrus dissolved to dust in front of them.

"Can't say she didn't warn you," Buffy quipped, stake in hand.

"Slayer!"

"Spike!" Harmony shrieked. "You… you _betrayed_ me?"

"Was never on your side, you silly bint," Spike rolled his eyes. "'Sides, it looked like you were having yourself a little mutiny here."

"Shut up!" Harmony spat ineffectually.

"Dawn, close your eyes," Buffy instructed, ignoring the two blonde vampires.

Dawn obeyed instantly, trembling in the chains as she heard the dull sound of flesh connecting with bone beginning to echo around the hall.

Spike was enjoying himself.

"Said you wanted some action tonight, didn't ya?" Spike gleefully punched Brad again. "Wasn't countin' on this, were you?"

He whipped the stake of his duster, and in a graceful spin kick, launched into the air, sending Brad against the cave wall with a sickening crack as bones broke. He let out a howl, but before he could crumple to the ground, his deadly assailant was already there, grasping him by the collar and staring into his eyes.

"Beddy bye," Spike snarled, before he pounded the wood into his heart. The dust drifted away.

_No one messes with Nibblet. Or Platelet. Or Junior, for that matter._

He turned around to find the Slayer fighting Mort. He winced as he landed a good one, and she reeled back.

"Ooh, good shot, Mort, I think you got her on the…"

Mort and Spike both turned around to glare at her, and she giggled nervously, before getting the hell out of there.

With that, it was just one overly muscled, overly strong, and overly idiotic vamp against Spike and Buffy. Twin grins plastered themselves over their faces as they baited the lumbering vampire, quick as lightning as they dodged under his steamroller punches. But when Spike tripped over the unicorn, things began to get ugly.

Their synchronized dance interrupted, Mort roared and threw the blonde vamp against the wall where Brad's dust lay. Spike swear he heard something crack as he almost bounced off. Mort charged at him, intent on ripping off his head, but in his murderous rage, he'd forgotten about the Slayer.

Spike and Buffy's eyes met under Mort's broad shoulders, and at the exact moment that Buffy thrust with the unicorn horn, Spike leapt gracefully out of the way. With a salient howl, Mort dissolved.

Buffy heaved Spike up by one hand, and he stumbled, his hand instinctively going to cradle his side. Once he was up, however, Buffy immediately ran over to Dawn.

"You are going to be in sooo much trouble when we get home," Buffy declared, striking at the chains.

Dawn pouted. "Yeah, well ... I'm telling Mom you slayed in front of me."

"Fine," Buffy countered. "I'll just tell her that you ran out of the house in the middle of the night…" she struck the chains again. "That you got Anya hurt…" she broke off a chain. "Invited a vampire in…" started on the other. "Got kidnapped..."

"But…" Dawn tried to interrupt.

"And it looks like you broke a couple of Spike's ribs as well," Buffy commented matter-of-factly.

Dawn gasped, and as soon as she was free, she rushed over and hugged Spike. Spike let out an unmanly yell and stumbled backwards, his body exploding in pain.

"Careful, Nibblet!" he yelped. "Broken ribs, 'ere!"

"I'm sorry Spike," Dawn looked so contrite that he inwardly cursed. "I didn't mean to get you hurt."

He grunted and pushed himself off the wall he was leaning on, staggering as he determinedly and stubbornly kept himself upright. "Yeah, well," he muttered. "Demon girl got hurt worse."

"I'm sorry," she repeated.

"Wasn't your fault, Nibblet. Now, I just have to go back to m'crypt."

The sisters watched in silence as he stalked off into the night, one arm still nestled protectively around his ribs.

"Are you sure he's the same vamp who tried to kill you so many times?" Dawn asked.

A suspicious glint crept its way into Buffy's eyes, tempered by a puzzled one.

"I have no idea," she replied.

8 8 8

**(Well? Little button over there...)**


	21. The First Signs

**Chapter 19: The First Signs**

**Disclaimer: No ownership. It's so sad… the only things I own are Bryan, Mia, Cassandra and Daniel… and from what you've seen of Bryan and Mia, would you even _want_ to own them?**

**Rating: I think I'm boring everyone to death repeating the same thing each time. See the first fourteen chapters if you haven't, yet :)**

**(I'm so sorry about the lack of updates for the past two weeks, but I've had to study for exams. But now? Freedom! twirls around and laughs ecstatically while feverishly opening a Buffy DVD No more exams! Yay! And thanks a million to Firestar, pinkpunkmonkey, and BAKAMAN for reviewing! And another thanks to everyone who have been waiting so patiently: ) )**

8 8 8

What the hell was possessing me?

What evil claw of base corruption had me twisted in its unrelenting grasp?

What nightmare of a hell dimension was causing me to scream in the throes of its hideous world?

Why the hell was I being so melodramatic?

The real question?

Why the hell was I helping the Scoobies?

8 8 8

I had to know for sure. As Dawn and I walked to the Sunnydale hospital to check if Anya was okay, I decided that I had to know for sure why a certain bleached blonde, irritating, cocky, arrogant, pain-in-my-ass, former arch-nemesis was acting a role that looked suspiciously like it had 'WHITE HAT' printed on the script in big, bold letters.

Throwing me the sword when the lava-demon, Toth, had been down. The chip hadn't even fired, which meant that he'd been trying to help me with no thought of trying to kill me, even though without the chip, he could have done so easily in that position. And if Spike wasn't trying to kill me, an apocalypse was coming. And that's what I was afraid of. Because it just wasn't possible. And how had he managed to turn up in the right place to save Dawn? And why had he helped them go after Dracula? Buffy didn't buy the 'we were old rivals' story. Sure, she wouldn't be surprised that the irritating vampire had made an enemy of the eminent undead Transylvanian, but the Spike of the old days would have waited by casually for Dracula to kill her, and then fought against him himself. Why help them? Why, in fact, even bother to warn them?

Stupid vampire. So much easier to deal with when he was trying to kill me.

8 8 8

"What's up?" Willow asked the next day when Buffy called the meeting. Buffy normally stayed pretty still, but today, she was paced the floor in her living room incessantly. They'd decided to have it at her house because she was meant to be looking after Dawn, even though Cassandra and Daniel were there too.

"I don't know," Buffy exhaled. "But _something_ is. Spike. Why's he helping us?"

"Buffy's right," Riley backed her up. Buffy smiled at him. _So ever-dependable._ "Spike's a vampire. He's a demon. And what my training has always taught me? Demons are there to be killed."

Dawn clenched her fist and would have stomped down the stairs and argued viciously when she felt Daniel's restraining hand.

"If they know we're listening, they'll stop talking and we won't get this chance again," he hissed. "Besides, this way we can warn Spike if anything happens."

Dawn ground her teeth and nodded her head slowly. She couldn't help it though. Her blood was rising at _Riley_, of all people, spouting off so self-righteously. Inside, she knew that he couldn't help it, and that was what he'd been taught, but if her inner instincts were correct, she was detecting a hint of jealous envy that laced through the ex-soldier's voice every time he spoke of Spike. And she trusted her inner instincts.

"I won't go so far as to say we should kill him," Giles interrupted. "After all, he has been very helpful as of late."

"And he's not really that bad," Willow chirped. At everyone's sudden look, she made a face. "Okay, discounting the hundred-plus years of torturing and maiming and rampaging."

"Despite that and the fact that he's tried to kill Buffy and everyone else several times, I think he's quite alright for a vampire," Anya commented honestly. "Especially a master vampire, at that. Most of them are usually either insanely evil or just insane."

"And you're saying Spike's not insanely evil?" Riley snorted, at the same time that Buffy laughed and said "Are you saying Spike's not insane?"

"Well, maybe a little," Anya conceded. "But not insane-insane-whacko! Like some of the others. Even Angelus, you know. We heard a lot of his exploits, us vengeance demons. Got called on him a couple of times. He was a nasty one that. Wasn't much better even with a soul."

"Ahn!" Xander cried sneaking a look at Buffy as he spoke for the first time. He'd been unnaturally silent during the entire time, as if he was deep in thought. Anya's candid words had snapped him out of it, however.

"What?" Anya asked defensively. "It's true! I didn't see much of him, but unsouled, he was a terror, and with a soul, he spent one hundred years living on rats in the London slums!"

"Dear Lord!" Giles gasped, truly horrified. "The London Slums in the 1900's? What was he thinking?"

"Exactly my point!" Anya said triumphantly.

Buffy had remained rather quiet during this, and Riley perused her intently. When she spoke, however, it was to guide them back to the topic at hand.

"If Spike isn't insanely evil, he's at least insane," she stated. "I want to know why he's helping us."

"H-has anyone even n-noticed that he's s-stopped asking f-for money?" Tara couldn't help the stutter. She had never known pre-chipped Spike, and she trusted her intuition and her psychic skills that the vampire was not insanely evil. And she couldn't help noticing how much he swaggered and boasted, and the feeling that she had that it was just a mask, near-perfected by a century of pretending.

"So he has," Giles reflected. "Well then. This makes this even more..."

Buffy knew that her Watcher was going to say 'fascinating', and start using Spike as a test subject for a thesis on master vampires rendered helpless. She cut him off.

"Unusual," she finished for him. "And I can't help but be suspicious."

"Why?" Anya asked. "He's been helping us. And that spell of yours. That enjoining spell. It helped you to see him, didn't it? So all you need to do is re-bind, and then you'll know."

"It's not that simple, Ahn," Xander said tiredly. "He's evil, remember?"

The way he said it was like he was trying to convince himself.

"But it's like… what was that thing you explained to me the other day? Yes! That saying! It's like looking a gift horse in the mouth. Not that there are such things as gift horses, and all, but you know what I mean. Why waste time stressing and being suspicious about master vampires trying to help you?"

"Being suspicious is kind of her job, Ahn," Xander laughed, his voice strained.

Anya fell silent, muttering under her breath something indistinguishable and inaudible. Her head still hurt from when the large vampire had knocked her down, but luckily it had only been serious enough to warrant an overnight stay at the hospital.

"I say we should just go stake him now," Riley said, his voice hard and cold. "To hell with all of the other crap. He's up to something."

Even Buffy recoiled from that. "But he's helpless. And he's been helping. What if we can use his demon contacts?"

"Buffy?" Riley rounded on her in disbelief. "You were just saying a minute ago that you were suspicious of him!"

"Yeah, well, I still am!" Buffy defended herself. "But Anya's right. The Hellmouth is growing again. Slayery instincts. Something's gonna happen, and when it does, we need all the people we've good. As much as I hate to say it… Spike didn't accomplish anything yesterday when he went and broke half his ribs to save Dawn."

"No, he accomplished something, alright," Riley glared into the distance as if he was picturing staking the master vampire himself. "He's worming his way into your good books. If you're right, and there is going to be a big fight, he'll betray us at the moment we need him and then everything will be lost. You can't trust a demon, Buffy, even if he's 'harmless'."

"I'm not saying I'm trusting him!" Buffy snapped back. "But we can use him. And… I don't think he'll betray us."

"You can't trust a demon, Buffy! Is nothing I'm saying getting through to you? I mean, I would have thought your experience with Angel would have shown that. All my training…"

Buffy cut him off as anger began to swell at his condescending attitude and the mention of her ex. "Riley, in case you've forgotten, your training was by a group of incompetent idiots who were intruding on _my _territory and who pumped you so full of drugs I'm surprised you're still standing. And Angel has nothing to do with this."

"Angel has everything to do with this!" Riley ranted, Buffy's words striking deep at his insecurities. He knew he shouldn't have mentioned her ex. He knew that he should calm down, maybe walk away and continue this discussion another time. But why couldn't she just _see_? "But he hurt you before, and I won't let…"

"_You_ won't let him?" Buffy demanded, a dangerous glint in her eye. "You won't let what happen? This is nothing to do with Angel, Riley, I've said it enough times! Just because I think that Spike won't betray us…"

"Why?" Riley snorted, cutting her off. "The spell? What's wrong with you, Buffy? As I said, you were saying only minutes ago that he was up to something!"

"Well… maybe he… I don't know…" Buffy looked confused. Glowering, Riley stomped out of the front door attempting to keep his anger in check, never glancing behind to see the three on the staircase.

"You're right, Buffy," Willow said after a long pause as they digested the fact that Buffy and Riley had just had a fairly heated argument in front of them. "I don't think he'll betray us."

Buffy was silent. The silence spread around the room, and if they'd been listening, they would have almost heard the three teenagers trembling with a mixture of anger and tenseness and relief in the hallway.

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

When she was pissed off, she went patrolling. It was like a natural order of things, after all. She could vent her rage on vamps with none of her friends to stare at her or draw back in fear at the dark side that she unleased in her pure anger. Buffy was still fuming when the first vampire came at her. A fierce joy came upon her as she pounded into him and heard the satisfying crack of his bones as she threw him against a crypt. Just as she was about to finish her kill, however, another figure appeared, swiped the vamp's legs from under him, and dusted him.

"Hey, that was _my_ vampire," Buffy said almost petulantly.

"You still angry at me, then?" Riley asked.

Remembering who she was talking to and what had transpired earlier that day, Buffy hardened. "Yeah. I am. Now I'm going to hunt more vamps, so excuse me…"

"Whoah… Riley grabbed her elbow. "Hunt?"

Buffy cursed her slip. This was between her, Giles, the First Slayer, and the vamps she hunted. The balance of predator and prey. Riley would never understand. "I meant patrol. I'm going to go patrol. And then we can talk."

"Why can't we talk now?"

Buffy's scathing reply was lost midst the underbrush crashing and then two figures appeared, rolling together in a deadly fight of fist and fangs, one laughing. Buffy recognized the timbre and the pure emotion behind that laugh and almost smiled. Spike. He was hunting, just like her.

Spike levered his boots under the other vampire and kicked hard, sending him flying to hit the exact spot that Buffy had thrown her vampire.

While Buffy was content to watch him decimate his foe, suddenly feeling all the rage drain out of her, Riley was not.

"What are you doing here, Spike?" he demanded.

"What does it look like?" Spike cheerfully crushed his opponent's nose. "I'm hunting. Just a spot o' violence before bedtime."

"Keep out of our way, Spike. We're not going to take this much longer."

Spike dusted his vampire, and then turned around confused. Buffy noticed he still favoured his injured side somewhat as he swaggered towards them.

"What are you talking about, Cub Scout?"

"Stop trying to worm your way into Buffy's good books. She's just about done with you."

"Worm my way into your good books?" Spike laughed in disbelief and Buffy thought she might have detected a hint of hurt in his voice. She quickly dismissed the thought. "Are you crazy?"

Before either Riley or Buffy could reply, Spike sized them up. Reading their body language, he slowly smiled.

"So that's the case, huh?" Spike cocked an eyebrow and turned towards her. "I'm sure the Slayer has a right to speak to herself in all this. Come now, Slayer. What am I doing that requires you to stake me? Helping save your little sister? Amusing myself in my spare time? What do you expect me to do, sit at home knitting cunning sweaters?"

"Shut up, Spike," Buffy said automatically.

Spike wasn't fooled. He studied them again, and the smirk came out into full force.

"Well now… there's been a little fight in paradise, has there? What's wrong, Slayer? He's not satisfying you in bed?"

Riley would have staked him then and there if Spike hadn't skipped away from his clumsy attack. "Or is it something else? Oh… I get it. You're not welcome here, Captain. Slayer wants you to stay at home so you don't get hurt. I've got some knitting needles you can borrow."

"Shut up, demon," Riley glared at him, restraining himself from (attempting) to rip the vampire's head off. "You don't know anything."

_I'll come back later. Without Buffy. Then I'll show him._

"Okay, when the macho pissing contest is over with, I'd like to go home," Buffy said dryly. "C'mon, Riley."

8 8 8

I watched as she dragged Captain Cardboard away. And the highlight of my life? Or rather, unlife? I was just enjoying watching Whitebread being shown up by the Slayer when she turned around and completed my night.

"Oh, and Spike?"

"Yes Slayer?"

"Thanks for helping me save Dawn."

I stared after them for a long time, before almost dancing back to my crypt, ecstatic with joy for no apparent reason. Luckily no-one saw me. Wouldn't have done my Big Bad image any good.

8 8 8

**(You know you want to review... :) )**


	22. Predator

**Chapter 20: Predator**

**Disclaimer: No ownership. It's so sad… the only things I own are Bryan, Mia, Cassandra and Daniel… and from what you've seen of Bryan and Mia, would you even _want_ to own them?**

**Rating: I think I'm boring everyone to death repeating the same thing each time. See the first fourteen chapters if you haven't, yet :)**

**A/N (Isn't it generally normal to have holidays right after you get exam marks back? sigh another two weeks of term… and then holidays! With… holiday homework. Oh well! does a random dance of excitement anyway. Thanks so much to BAKAMAN and Kim for reviewing :P. And Dieu Anonyme? Patience is indeed a virtue : ). Thankyou for all of you for putting up with my long two week study-period, and as a result, I'm updating again early for your wonderful reviews! And I've written the Riley scene here specially for you, Dieu Anonyme. : ). Yes, he is a very loyal and honest and clean-cut guy… but he's not for Buffy, and what he did to her was horrible as well. But I'm not here for gratuitous Riley bashing (unfortunately. Maybe I'll write another fic for that if I'm feeling down. : ) ) I'm here for Spuffy! Enjoy, everyone, and please R&R!)**

8 8 8

_The voice made me wake. The sun shone so brightly I had to blink It didn't hurt. Things never hurt around here. Except for when she comes. So bright like fire. Knives that flash everywhere. So fast that I can't follow them._

_It's disorienting. I sit down, and then he comes again. Always with a smile on his face. I laugh behind my tears._

"_Hey."_

_He doesn't talk this time. I don't know why. I go to him. Look at him concernedly. "Hey? What's wrong?"_

_He still doesn't talk._

"_What's wrong? What's wrong? What's wrong!"_

_I can hear my voice echoing off non-existent corridors, growing more hysterical with each reverberation. He's not talking. He never not talks! What's wrong? What's wrong? What's wrong? It's an endless litany in my mind. I find myself chanting it._

"_What's wrong! What's **wrong!**"_

_He still doesn't respond. It scares me, and when I get scared, bad things happen._

_The grass underneath my feet was soft before. Comforting, with gentle dew drops glimmering in the sun. I laugh at myself. Gentle? Haven't heard my voice form those words for a long time. But then I don't laugh anymore, because they suddenly prick me, and I'm bleeding as they turn into knives._

_I try to reach him. I don't know what I'd do. Protect him, maybe? He never needed protection before. But it's my first instinct._

_They hurt. They really hurt. Blood drops from the steel and I know it's mine. And then I'm screaming, because he's gone, and he spent all the time looking at me as if he was trying to say something, but he just couldn't. And I already ache, knowing that those words were vital. What's wrong! What's wrong?_

_I hear my voice, and it's a wail now as the sun grows dark and the knives begin to dance around me. Blood seems to be everywhere, and I know with a horrible certainty it's not all mine. I know whose it is, too. And then suddenly there's more. A crimson river of it mixed with tears, and I scream._

"_What's wrooooooooonnnnnnnnnnnngggggggg!"_

_My voice draws out each letter with such fervent urgency I start to cry. And when I start, I don't stop. The tears pour out of me like an ocean. How long ago was the last time I cried? How long ago was the last time I really felt unafraid? Unashamed? _

_I scream it out again, because I'm on my knees, now. The knives have vanished, and the sun's shining bright again on soft grass. But I know they can come back at any time now. Along with her. And him…_

_He's there. And he's looking straight at me._

"_What's wrong?" I ask softly. I don't recognize my voice. It's hoarse from crying and scratchy. I need to blow my nose. My eyes sting like anything. I feel like crap._

_He doesn't reply again. But I know he will!_

"_What's wrong?" I repeat. Louder. More insistent._

_The third time I say it, he finally replies._

"_Why, you, of course."_

_And then I scream like I've never screamed before as the waves of guilt and terror I've dammed up crash down on me unrelentingly. They suck away my breath and I'm drowning…_

_And then there was light._

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

"Pythagoras?" Cassandra asked.

Dawn rolled her eyes. "Come _on!_ Does it really get any simpler? A squared + B squared C squared! Get _over_ it already!"

"But you did it wrong!" Daniel cried melodramatically. "In this question, it's C squared – B squared A squared! The horror! The tragedy! We'll have to spend another _five weeks_ studying it!"

Even Cassandra, who was obviously stressed out, had to laugh at that.

"I wonder who's going to win the Drama Queen award of the month," Dawn teased.

"Spike," Daniel nodded sagely.

At that, they stopped laughing. "He has been acting weirdly lately, hasn't he?"

"Ever since… Harmony," Dawn swallowed.

Cassandra took a breather from hyperventilating about their upcoming maths test to pat her on the back. Daniel was oblivious. He was off following a speculation that was beginning to unfold.

"From what you lot have told me, he's been acting weirdly since the spell. I wonder if it's affecting him?"

Dawn and Cassandra looked at each other, the understanding shared by female teenagers shining through.

"He has no clue, does he?" Dawn mouthed silently.

Cassandra shook her head, eyes glinting mischievously. "No, he really doesn't," she mouthed back.

"I don't think even _he_ has a clue," Dawn mused. "I bet you he doesn't even notice half the time."

"Yeah."

They sat with mirrored smiles on their faces until Daniel finally stopped rambling and saw their eyes on him.

"What?" he asked.

They looked at each other, and burst out laughing.

Daniel snorted, and then sighed and shoved the maths book back into his bag. "Will the bell just ring already?" he queried, agitated. "I'd rather get this maths test over and done with without having to keep on waiting."

"Me too," Cassandra agreed. "It stresses me out."

"Everything stresses you out," Dawn joked. "Come on, you two! Just _chill_. Are all people from wherever you two come from so stressed?"

"Not really," Cassandra mused. "It's not that different here. Just without the Hellmouths and the demons and the…"

"Random disappearances?" Daniel supplied.

"Yeah, that too," Cassandra agreed.

"I wonder what it'd be like," Dawn murmured. "I mean, whole life living with Slayer, here! Well, most of my life. Well, only after Buffy was Called, but you know what I mean."

Cassandra and Daniel shared a look over Dawn's head, the same thought going through their minds.

_How are we going to tell them that every second of Dawn's childhood was a lie?_

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

I couldn't believe the raw _power_ that was surging through me now. The complete and utter strength that seeped through my body. My heart beat a staccato rhythm, but this feeling of invincibility… it was beyond anything I had dreamed of. _So this is what Buffy feels like when she patrols,_ something sung in my mind. _This is what it is like to be a Slayer. To feel this power coursing through you, to know that your physically attuned body could overcome anything._ It was like a high delivered directly from a needle, I mused. Not that I'd taken drugs before… Iowan born and bred. Clean. Unlike that filthy demon…

Why she kept him alive, I had absolutely no idea. I'd never really seen him fight. Not properly. But now, with this… strength, I could surely take his place! Every single time she went to that fiend for help or backup, I longed to shove a piece of wood into his dead heart. And now, I was about to take advantage of my power. To tidy up a few things. Buffy had been affected by the spell, that was all. Everyone had. I was the only one with a clear mind around here. Why else would that _demon_ help them? To ultimately betray her, of course. And I couldn't let that happen to her. I had to protect her from that. And the best thing was that she'd never know. There'd just be a pile of dust left on the floor. Maybe after she'd calm down, I'd tell her. And then she would thank me.

I stormed into the crypt, stake ready in my hand, only to feel…

I roared and struggled, but the net didn't give way. I was trapped… what the…? How could he, _it_ have…!

8 8 8

I looked down at the snarling, half-spitting Initiative _scum_. And a hatred I couldn't believe filled me. Bloody hell… if it hadn't been for the piece of silicone the weakling in front of me had helped shove into my brain, I would've killed him. Right there, right then. As it was, I watched him futilely struggle around for a little while.

"You… filthy… demon!" he spat. "How did you know!"

My voice was hard. Incredibly cold. "What? That you were going to come and try to off me? Haven't you heard of vampiric hearing, you stupid sod?" _There, I kept my promise to Nibblet, Platelet, and Junior._

"Try to kill you?" Whitebread snarled. "Damn well wouldn't have tried. I'd have succeeded."

"Is that so?" I prowled around him lazily relaxed. And then my ears finally picked up on his heartbeat. It wasn't just the fear that was starting to seep through the bravado. It was… irregular.

"What are you going to do?" He struggled to a kneeling position, and then realizing what it must have looked like, almost leapt upwards, still hopelessly entangled. Watching him carefully, I strolled casually over to where the rope that would release him dangled.

"What's wrong with you?" I demanded abruptly. "Your little ticker's going haywire. And even I know you can't be _that_ afraid. Riiight?" I smirked.

"What would you know?" he demanded.

I concentrated on his heartbeat, and the sound of his blood pounding through his veins. Then I whiffed the air. There it was! A distinct, faint, scent of…

I laughed. Hysterically. This was beyond ironic, and the bitter side of me did a bloody dance of joy. "Well now… looks like the fancy lil' drugs the Initiative pumped you up with have done their job, haven't they? Too bad they didn't look at the side effects before turning you into right little guinea pigs, eh?"

He only glared at me, murderously. "What? You too coward to face me? Going to keep me tangled up in this net just so you can taunt me?"

He thought I was a coward? I would have laughed again. This _boy_ had no idea who he was dealing with.

"Well, actually, I was planning on bringing the Slayer here to see you in such a mess," I drawled. "But I think I'll have more fun letting your sorry ass go so you can go home with your tail between your legs."

"You can't hurt me," he said defiantly. "The chip's still working."

"Yeah," I agreed diffidently.

"Well, I can still hurt you," Capt'n Cardboard struggled again. "Or at least give Buffy a good enough reason to stake you when she comes. Who do you think she'll believe? In fact, why would she care if I came here to stake you?"

I pulled the rope, and watched with growing glee as he tried to fumble himself out. "Because, Mr. I'm-trying-to-play-hero, what would I gain out of tyin' you up and havin' a few laughs? And she already knows you're a little boy trying to be a man. You think you can protect her from me?" I bared my fangs at him, eyes flashing gold. "You don't know what you're up against. Even if I was trying to kill Buffy, which I'm not, and if you hadn't shoved this chip into my head, you would just be another body in my wake. You think those drugs they pumped into you make you strong enough for her?" I laughed derisively. "She's the bloody Slayer, mate."

"You're a demon," he finally got himself loose. I knew I'd hit him in the core, and it gave me a deep glow of satisfaction. He had so many weak spots below his G.I bloody Joe exterior. And it felt good giving them a good prod. I dodged the stake he threw at me, and it clattered against the wall uselessly.

"Now, don't try taking me on by your little self," I shifted to gameface, grinning. "Why don't you bring along the Slayer to hide behind? Oh, right, if she'd even agree to killing me in the first place."

He moved so quickly I wasn't expecting it. _Ah, right, you soddin' fool_, my brain told me. _The drugs, remember? _The knife had appeared in his hand, it slashed down my face, but I gathered my wits and dodged backwards. The scent of my own blood put me back in full fighting mode. I couldn't hurt him directly, sure. But Angelus, I inwardly half-shuddered half-growled at the name, had taught me many things.

He moved at me again, curving the knife in a tight arc. I sneered. He thought he could use it? I'd been up against bloody fledgelings who could use a knife better than him. For all of his soldier training, and even his enhanced status, he was no match for me. I dodged again, and his fist slammed into the crypt wall. But instead of Whitebread roaring with pain like I'd expected him to, he merely shrugged it off.

Right. The drugs.

I often thought that the reason I fought the Slayer so many times because every single fight we had, either of us knew when to beat a strategic retreat. I was _not_ going to spar with the idiot for the entire afternoon. The sun outside blocked me going out the more conventional way. But the sewer entrance…

I flipped the trapdoor open and leapt down, risking a few broken bones. Luckily, I landed softly, and then sprinted through the sewers, leaving Capt'n Cardboard shouting behind me.

"You're nothing but a demon, Spike! Why don't you face up to me like a real man?"

_Oh I will, boy,_ I thought. _Mark my words. I will._

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

_She runs after me. Knife in hand. Chases me through the graveyard, vaulting over the tombstones of the cemetery. I remember this one. This was the graveyard we first visited on our nightly patrols. Back when we were still wary, but were beginning to realize that the other wasn't a threat/ Slowly, during the course of that night, we began to trust each other. Mirror each other's moves. Communicate without thought. It was the first time I'd ever felt that spark of recognition well up amongst the fierce blaze of primal joy I always felt when slaying. That spark that just named her as kindred. A sister. Closer than a sister, in a way. Her death triggered Kendra's, and Kendra's death triggered my power, so in a sense, I had a lot to thank her for. I can still remember how easily I forgot that. How quickly I became confused under their righteousness and judgemental attitudes. All black and white? No way. It was simple, to me. I'd lived by my three rules for so long anyway. I had to._

_Want… Take… Have…_

_But now, everything is different. I have a sudden feeling of déjà vu sweep over me, only I'm not entirely sure why. She's never held that knife in front of her. It's intricate. A bejewelled dagger of crystal. The moonlight reflects off the hilt as she chases me. The perfect circle of predator and prey._

_And then we hear other footsteps. We break off our chase, as the newcomer saunters towards us._

_He smiles. "Hello, Faith."_

_And the knife he holds in his hand flashes me back to memories I would rather have forgotten. From, 'this is a thing of beauty, boss,' to Buffy shoving it in my gut. The way it slid into me, accompanied by the cold bite of metal and my insides screaming with pain. A hollow victory. I wonder if she ever knew I felt that kiss… in my fevered dreams wracked with pain and bloodshed. But it wasn't my blood. It was his. The deputy's. And then it was my mother's blood as she lay before me, haemorrhaging from the heroin overdose. And then my Watcher's, as Kakistos shattered her. And then the demons'. Blood, blood, blood, blood, blood…_

_We're at a standstill. In a triangle. Buffy at the top, me and… him, and the bottom. Both of them looking at me._

"_I trusted you, Faith. You betrayed us. You nearly got us all killed!"_

"_Come now, girl. Don't let her talk to you that way! You always were a sassy thing."_

"_Faith, don't listen to him!"_

"_Faith, Faith, are you going to let her stand there and talk like that about you? About me?"_

_And then, for the first time, I speak._

"_He loves me," I tell her. I watch her eyes widen in surprise, and then narrow. "He loves me like a daughter. Can't you understand that?"_

_She glares back at me, roughly. "Yeah? Well my dad left us after fifteen years of him telling me he loved me. So no. I guess you could say I can't understand that."_

"_Come now," he says, that same smile pasted across his face. "Not all fathers are bad just because your little daddy decided that he was better off without the likes of you!"_

_She stiffens, and then turns the full icy blaze of her stare on him. "You might love her," she enunciates, slowly and carefully. "But you killed half of the people at Graduation. God knows how many years they spent living in the Hellmouth on a city that you built, just so you could entertain delusions of being a big snake! Weigh that up, oh snakey one."_

"_Did no-one teach you manners?" he retorts. "In my days, no-one talked to their elders like…"_

_I cut him off. To them, it's not about me anymore. It's about the hatred between them. Of two predators, facing each other off before they attack. Fighting over the last morsel of meat. Well, neither of them are going to get it. They've forgotten that I'm a predator too._

"_Shut up. Both of you."_

_They turn to look at me in sheer disbelief. "Come now, Faith. Don't use that language…"_

_She, however, doesn't say anything. I look into her eyes, and I wonder at the lost opportunities. I see them now. If I had trusted them. If I hadn't gone into such a downwards spiral and signed my soul over for some love. If I hadn't been so blind, I would have seen that they loved me all along. How ironic._

"_You two are not fighting over me like a bone," I spit. "I'm a person. A goddamn, person! You see, I've learnt a lot from you two in the last year. Learnt a lot about you as well. And you," I point at her, "Are an arrogant, holier-than-thou, self-righteous bitch."_

_She takes the words in her stride. "Oh yeah? Well you're just a crazy psychopathic bitch who went to the dark side. Where does that leave the both of us?"_

_I grin at her fire, because I feel it too, and then turn to him. "And you? You were funny. Kind. Gentle. You took care of me. Never hit me. Never hurt me. You loved me."_

"_As a daughter, Faith," he smiles. "I see that you've finally found out. You've finally made your decision."_

8 8 8

Faith woke up.

8 8 8

Buffy ran desperately through the graveyard, her heart pounding in fear.

"Hyperadrenal overload and a bunch of stuff that sounds even worse than that, and all it means is he's way stronger than he oughta be and feeling no pain. His heart can't take it. We've been at him for weeks about it."

There's a specialist waiting at Sunnydale General, fourth floor neurology. Get Riley there. If you don't-

"_Engleman said Walsh were feeding you drugs."_

"_Something's crawling inside me."_

"I don't want to think about the damage our guys could do under the stress of withdrawal."

"_I'll get him there."_

The words kept ringing through her head. Fast. They hurt. They whirled and played scrabble with her neurons as she ran towards the grey crypt. Knowing instinctively he would help. Knowing instinctively that as a vampire, he could follow Riley's scent. That thought didn't even freak her out anymore. Hell, nothing could freak her out even more at the moment. Her nerves were still frazzled from the chance run in with a bruised and beaten Graham, his voice filled with such an urgency it scared her. She reached the crypt door, knocked twice, waited impatiently, and then was about to rip the door off its hinges when it was opened.

"Slayer," Spike greeted her. "What's got you in a huff?"

Just because he was there, and just because she was worried, scared, and angry, and just because he was looking so full of himself, she slammed him against a pillar. It relaxed her immediately.

"Oi!" he cried indignantly. "I haven't done anything…"

"Riley," she resisted the impulse to bloody his nose and step back. "Riley. He's got some heart problem because he's reacting to the drugs the Initiative pumped into him to make him superman. I need to find him and take him to the Initiative doctor. And I need you to help me."

He lazily stretched, rubbing his back where she'd shoved him against the pillar. "And what's in it for me?"

She wanted to scream in frustration, but she was ready. Still, she felt her heart sinking a little bit as she dug in her pocket. So it was back to this.

"Three hundred after you help me," she said curtly. "Now let's go!"

He moved, but he didn't take the money. Instead, he closed her hand over it and then turned around to shrug into his duster. She gaped at him.

"What?" he demanded.

"You're not taking the money?" she queried uncertainly.

"No. Because it would be kicking you when you were down," the words came out in a jumbled mass. "I mean, I c'n see you're worried about the soddin' soldier boy, okay? It's just that…" he ran his fingers through his hair, and then sighed, frustrated. "Look, forget it. Let's just go so that I can catch a whiff of his not-so-manly cologne and deliver him safe and sound to the doctor who could take my chip out, okay?"

Her eyes widened, and she reached for her stake, but he had already whirled past her, that strange moment of tumbled words and nervousness gone like the wind. "C'mon, Slayer," he called impatiently, looking back at her. "Let's look for Whitebread."

It was only then that she realized half of his face was caked with blood.

8 8 8


	23. GI Joe

**Chapter 21: G.I Joe**

**Disclaimer: Not mine. I'd say something smart and witty, but I can't think of anything at the moment. :P**

**Rating: I think I'm boring everyone to death repeating the same thing each time. See the first fourteen chapters if you haven't, yet :)**

**A/N (Thankyou very much to Kim and Dieu Anonyme for reviewing! This chapter's for you two! To Kim, no he doesn't love her… yet. :). Or maybe he does, and he hasn't realized:P. I'll leave you to judge that for yourself. And I'm glad you're enjoying the Buffy/Spike trust thing, Dieu Anonyme. And to clear things up, yes Spike ran from his crypt and came back afterwards. And yes, if I'm in the mood, Riley-bashing is fun, sometimes. Other times, I feel sorry for the poor guy… Oh god, did I just say that!**

**Anyway, without ado, here is your chapter! Enjoy! R&R, please!)**

**8 8 8**

"Oh my God, Spike! What happened?"

"Why would you care, Slayer?" he stalked angrily through the graveyard. He couldn't believe it. He was passing up a chance to get the damned chip out of his head. Just because of the little blonde bundle running behind him and dragging him around to face her. He couldn't believe it. What was wrong with him? What was _wrong_ with him? Passing up a chance to become the bloody, torturous, killer, and win back his black goddess again…

Only he didn't want to.

_What do I want?_ His mind screamed at him.

_I want this bloody chip out of my head._ He replied. _But I don't want to lose…_

"Why would I care?" he was spun back to the present as Buffy grabbed his leather duster and forcibly pulled him around to face her. "I don't actually know, okay? But if we're going to find Riley, I need you in top condition."

She regretted the lie as soon as it left her mouth. Why do I care? She asked herself savagely, before quashing down the little voice inside that responded that maybe, just maybe, she was beginning to see the vampire as…

A friend? An enemy? A mortal-enemy-turned-friend? Buffy only winced inwardly when she saw Spike's eyes turn to icy blue chips, and then gasped audibly when he grasped her arm and opened up the latent connection between them.

Riley. Storming. Angry. Spike. Expectation. Coolness. Net. Trapped. Fear. Taunt. Chip. Release. Knife. Blood. Anger. Hatred. Calculation. Sewers. Revenge.

Buffy pushed Spike away, and he landed with an audible thump on the grass. She shook her head wildly, disbelievingly as her senses were overwhelmed. _Where's Giles? _She wanted to scream._ He's supposed to have figured out this connecty thing!_

Spike, however, had already leapt to his feet and dusted himself off. "Done, Slayer?" he demanded. "There you go. You've got what happened. Now let's search for Whitebread so you can sleep comfy in your bed tonight!"

He turned, and walked off without making sure she was following for the second time that day, and dazed by the vitriol in his words and the overwhelming feelings that Spike had channelled into her, she followed, her mind thinking wildly. When this was all over, she promised herself, Giles, Xander, Willow, Spike, and herself would sit down and join. Because Spike at the moment was the only one pioneering enough to use the connection when he couldn't use words… hang on, that wasn't right.

As Buffy quickened her step to match his angry pace as he followed Riley's fading scent, she went back to all the things that Spike had ever said to her, and realized that he had no problem in expressing himself. His thoughts rolled from his mouth before they were even complete in impulsive, fiery acts of pure emotion, whether hatred or love. And it was with a strange feeling of regret that she realized the only reason Spike used the… _connection_ with her and the Scoobies was in cases when he was driven to the limit and knew they wouldn't believe him.

Everything was just too confusing. She let her Slayer mode take over her, and began purposefully sorting through everything. She would find Riley. She would take him to the doctor. He would get better, and then everyone needed to talk. Because things were just getting too weird.

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

When even Buffy's ears could pick up the muted poundings, Spike stopped.

"What is it?" Buffy looked carefully around the caves. She still didn't like this place. It was too recently the scene of too many human deaths, and the blatant reminder that sometimes the humans were the ones who were out of line that got her.

"Soldier Boy's around the corner," Spike managed to sound offhand. He'd calmed down a fair bit during the walk. Now, he lit a cigarette and leaned against the wall.

She stared at him.

"Well what?" he asked defensively. "You really expect me to walk in there with you and persuade soldier boy to get a brain?"

She hit him instinctively. Just as instinctively, he dodged, and continued smoking. "I don't think Whitebread's going to listen to my voice of reason."

She glared at him, knowing he was right. "Okay, thanks," she said abruptly. "Here's your money."

He stared her coolly down. "Don't want money. Told you before. Now get in there before Soldier Boy punches his arm off."

She glared at him one last time, and then turned the corner, still wondering why she always had the urge to punch Spike when he was around. Even when he was helping her. She was greeted with the sight of Riley, sweat running down his face, single-mindedly punching the cave wall. The blood streaming down his knuckles indicated that he'd been there for quite a while.

"Riley…"

"You know, this doesn't even hurt," he said softly. A sharp feeling of awe, determination and stubbornness seemed to radiate around him. Her senses seemed to be strangely heightened all of a sudden. She could hear the beating of his heart, a staccato rap on cold metal, and smell the metallic blood that coated his arms. She could even smell the exhaustion in him… and her eyes somehow picked something up about the way he was standing. Something that she was very well acquainted with.

Denial.

"Your hand is bleeding," she whispered.

"Don't feel a thing," he replied. He moved to punch the wall again, but with lightning quick reflexes, Buffy caught his hand. She'd never known she could move that fast. In a voice she could barely recognize, she spoke.

"This stops now. I'm taking you to the doctor."

Riley laughed, a bitter, angry laugh. "The one from the government, you mean? Like the ones who did this to me in the first place?" he backed away from her. "No thanks."

She moved towards him, matching each step. "He's the only one that understands what's wrong with you. He's the only one that can help."

"That's the thing, Buffy," Riley shot back. "What _is_ wrong with me? I'm more powerful than I've ever been before. Can you see me? No pain. I'm quicker. I can run further, I can fight better. Most people would kill to feel this way."

"Yeah, and this feeling is _going_ to kill you. Riley," Buffy returned angrily. "Your body was not built for this kind of strength…"

He cut her off. "I can handle it. This is my deal, Buffy, just ... back off."

Riley tried to stalk past her, and seemed surprised when she let him past. But he felt her eyes boring on him all the way, until he stopped just before he turned the corner, never aware of the vampire that was listening intently to the trouble in 'paradise' with a keen ear.

"What is this?" Buffy demanded.

He turned around and studied her.

"What's happening to you? Why are you like this? Riley, you know that you're going to die if you keep this up. Do you want to die? Just so that you can fell all strong and manly for a little while?"

Obviously stung, Riley retaliated. "If I go back, and let the government get whimsical with my innards again… they could do anything! Best case scenario, they turn me into another Joe Normal. Just… another guy."

"You're not 'just another guy'," Buffy replied. "Come on, Riley, you know that. Just another guy wouldn't know this world. This crazy world of demons and fighting and magic. Just another guy wouldn't bear it like you. You're not just another guy. You're _Riley_. You're the guy who got brought up in Iowa. The guy who's always honest, and always good. Who goes to Church every Sunday morning, and gets to fight for the good in his own way. Isn't that enough for you? To just be Riley?" Riley snorted softly. "It's not enough for _you_."

Buffy unconsciously stepped back, hurt in her voice. "Why would you say that?"

"Come on," Riley derided. "Your last boyfriend wasn't exactly a civilian."

"So that's what this is about?" Buffy demanded, tears beginning to collect in her eyes even though she tried hard not to give in. Suddenly, they vanished as if someone had wiped them away. Surprised and disoriented, she shook her head and got back on track. "You're going to die, all over some macho pissing contest?"

Riley shook his head, trying desperately to get her to understand. "It's not about him. It's about us."

"What are you talking about?" Buffy laughed shakily, almost hysterically. "You just brought it up."

"You're getting stronger every day, more powerful," he explained. "I can't… touch you," his voice broke. "Every day, you're just ... a little further out of my reach."

Now, Buffy had tears in her eyes. And they didn't disappear mysteriously as she walked towards him. "You wanna touch me?" she took his hand. "I'm right here. I'm not the one running away."

_Not this time._

Riley turned away from her. "Not yet."

Buffy looked at him, anger mixing with hurt in her eyes. "So you have this all figured out? I'm bailing because you're not in the super club."

Riley shrugged. "It's human nature."

Anger won. "Don't Psych 101 me, Riley. Not now. Not after Adam and everything we've been through together."

"What is it, Buffy? What have we been through together? Is it enough to keep you happy?"

"What are you saying? Does this mean… does everything mean _nothing_ to you?"

Riley sighed, and his shoulders slumped. "I never said that."

"Oh really?" she demanded. "Because it sure doesn't seem like that to me now! It obviously doesn't mean anything to you! Do you really think so little of me?"

"Buffy…"

"No! Do you think that I'm with you, and I've been with you for the last six months because you had superpowers? Riley, it's because of you. If you think I'm so shallow that I only date guys who are strong…"

"No!" Riley looked frustrated. "It's not that! It's because you're the Slayer, Buffy! You need someone to help you who's as strong as you. And I don't cut it if I go to that doctor."

"Riley, if you don't go to that doctor, you'll be dead! I don't need someone to help me fight. I've got that covered…"

"I've seen you, Buffy," Riley overrode her. "You'll come back sometimes, and you'll be limping. And that means that some bastard of a demon out there got to you, and I could have been there to stop it."

"Riley, Xander could have been there to stop it. Do you see him? He's been with me through five apocalypses! And the only superpower he has is that he can make me laugh! I need you because of _you_, Riley. Not because of your muscles."

"Do you need me?" Riley returned. His face was shadowed in the caves, and already Buffy felt like she was losing him. Time ticked away in her mind as she began to regain control over her emotions. She could argue with him afterwards. After he was safe.

With all emotion almost drained from her voice, she spoke. "I need someone who will love me and will never leave me. I thou… I think that that person is you. And I need you healthy to support me. But if you wanna throw it all away because you don't trust me, then… then I'm still gonna make you go to that doctor!"

Riley looked at her, and then sighed.

"Take me to him."

Buffy nodded, but she didn't feel triumphant. Instead, she suddenly felt empty. "We have to hurry."

She started to stride past him, but he grabbed her arm and turned her to face him.

"Loving you is the scariest thing I've ever done, Buffy."

"I don't know why." She placed her hand over his heart, drinking in his smell and the sound of his heartbeat.

"The doctor said we didn't have much time."

They left together. Hand in hand. As if seeking to physically close the gap that had threatened to split them apart.

Spike stamped out his cigarette and melted into the shadows.

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

Graham opened the door, and Buffy rushed in before he could stop her. "Is he okay? Did it work? Did we come in time?"

"He's fine," Graham reassured her. A faint smile crossed his face. "You got him here in time."

She started to grin, and then stopped as she remembered how. _Spike. I have to…Giles…_

"All patched up," Dr. Overheiser brought her back to the present.

She nodded distractedly, and then moved over to where Riley was lying on the table. He winced, but then sat up. Buffy lightly touched the bandage on his chest with whispering fingers.

"How's it going in there?" she asked.

"Good," he replied. A shadow of a look passed his face, one that she couldn't decipher. "Back to normal."

She suddenly noticed that she couldn't hear his heartbeat anymore. So she rectified that by laying her head against his chest.

"Yep," she smiled.

He stroked her hair as if she was an angel. Touching her with awe, like he couldn't believe she was there. She leant back and took his other bruised and bloodied hand, now bandaged up, and pulled it to her heart.

"See?" she smiled weakly. "I'm still touchable."

Riley nodded. "I'll take full advantage of that fact soon, I hope."

She lightly laughed, and then kissed him briefly. "Are you going to be okay? I'm sorry to leave you so soon, but I need to check up on Dawn and Cassandra and Daniel. Mum was going to go out today, and I don't want…"

Riley looked up at her. "Yeah. Go ahead. I'll be fine.

"I'll talk to you later," she kissed him again.

He wanted to cling onto her reflexively, but he didn't, and he watched her as she went. The door closed behind her. He stared at it for a while, thinking.

And that was how Graham found him, three minutes later.

"It's a good thing Buffy found you when she did," he commented casually. " 'Cause you were about to detonate big-time. Always said she's pretty impressive."

Riley didn't look at him. He just kept staring at the door. "You know," he murmured. "She really is."

Graham looked around the room, and then sat down on a spare stool. "But you know you don't belong here, right?" he asked in a matter-of-fact tone. "This town? I mean, you're nothin' here."

"Hey," Riley objected, finally meeting his gaze. "What are you saying?"

"Come on, man," Graham stared at him keenly. "You know it's true. There's nothing for you here."

Riley turned to look back at the door. "There's her."

Graham held up his hands in mock surrender. "Okay, right, there's her. And? You used to have a mission, and now you're what? The mission's boyfriend? Mission's true love?

Riley ignored him.

"You belong with us, man. You belong with us. We're not the Initiative. We're the army, and we're doing something good here. You can't do anything in this town, and you know it."

Graham stayed there for another five minutes of silence, before walking out the door.

8 8 8

Faith weighed the device in her hand, and then turned to knock on the door of 1630 Revello Drive.

8 8 8


	24. Confusion

**Chapter 22: Confused**

**Disclaimer: No ownership. I've got most of the DVDs, though!**

**Rating: I think I'm boring everyone to death repeating the same thing each time. See the first fourteen chapters if you haven't, yet :)**

**A/N (Apologies for the long wait. I'm just going to blame writer's block and leave it at that. A couple of really hard-to-write chapters ahead and some confusion, so I'd really appreciate if you guys reviewed to tell me what you thought about it quality wise, and any other ideas. Thanks to kim for reviewing! I think I put in the Author's Note a few chapters back that in this AU setting, the Faith body-switch hasn't happened yet. In fact, I'm going to mess around a lot with the time events of chronology for a specific reason, and explain it all later, so be prepared for some things in Season 4 popping up randomly. And yes, you can take the boy out of the army, but not the army out of the boy. : ). And… about Buffy learning to give Spike due credit? I haven't called this eventual Spuffy for nothing! )**

**By the way… and I feel pathetic for asking, but I was wondering if anyone had heard of this fic I've been trying to chase up for an eternity? It's AU, Spike's a social worker who moves into Buffy's apartment, Joyce is dead (she was a drug-addict) so Dawn, who's been traumatised, comes to live with them. Faith is Buffy's counsellor, and Angel has abused her. It's really bugging me, because it was a great fic and I'd love to read it again… if anyone has any details (author, title, etc) could you please post it in your review or email me? Thanks. I'm sorry for the bother… it's just I'm desperate.**

**Okay, now onto our regularly scheduled chapter. : ) Hope you enjoy.)**

8 8 8

I went out to get drunk.

No, scrap that. I went out to get bleedin' off my rocker with all the grog I could lay my hands on. Willie's was closed 'cos of a little scuffle I'd had a day or so ago with a few demons who'd started to try to beat up Willie. I needed some violence anyway.

Now, I needed to get very, very, drunk.

So, the Bronze it was, then.

I threaded my way through the bouncing teenagers with no idea of a beat or any concept of the word rhythm, quelling the demon that rose and struggled for dominance. It didn't get easier with time. I needed to push the bloodlust into the very bottom of my… spirit, I guess.

I'd just taken a gulp of my seventh bottle when I saw her. Or rather, I smelt her before I saw her. That vanilla fragrance that danced around her like a bloody… dancer, I guess. She was out on the dance floor, moving her body like…

I swallowed. Other areas of my anatomy began to get rather excited. The way she was moving… it was like fire and ice and wanton abandonment. I'd never seen her that open… that… dirty. It just wasn't like her.

I don't know how long I stared at her, entranced. But then she finally moved off the floor, flushed, and conveniently, slap-bang into me.

"Whoops," Buffy laughed twirling around.

I struggled to maintain my composure. I really didn't want to talk to her tonight. I just wanted to get drunk. But her proximity was starting to…

"Oh, you," I muttered.

She looked at me strangely. "And you."

I felt my defences slip in. Must have been the alcohol making me so touchy. Oh, and the event that led to the consuming of said alcohol. Plus the fact I was already well on my way to being smashed. "What are you doing here, Schlayer? Shouldn't you be looking after Captain Cardboard? Or is he dead, and you're shelebrating?" _I wish,_ I added silently in my head.

"Captain Cardboard?" she furrowed her brow. "Who are you talking about?"

"Scholdier Boy, you know?" I reminded her impatiently. I really didn't want to get into this conversation at the moment. Maybe later. And I was still puzzling over why she'd left him when they'd gotten so sickeningly lovey-dovey…

"Soldier Boy? Oh… the G.I Joe…"

"Very funny, Schlayer" I moved to go past her. She followed me, tilting her head to the left instead of the right…

"You're a vampire," she said.

"Okay, what the hell is wrong with you?" I spun around and stopped her before she could touch me. "You bloody well know I'm a vampire."

"Nothing," she stammered. "It's just…"

"What's wrong, temporary amnesia from lying too much?" I was starting to get angry. Goddammit, could I just get drunk in peace without her popping up? "Let me refresh your memory, Schlayer. I _was_ a vampire. And as soon as I get this chip out of my head, I'll be a

vampire again. But until then, I'm just as helpless as a kitten up a tree. So why don't you sod off?"

"Ok."

Now that got me.

"Oh, fine! Throw it in my face, why don't you Schlayer? Spike goes against his bloody nature for you, and Spike's not a threat and Spike can't help and is a soulless demon who has no feelings. I'll turn my back. He can't hurt me. Not even a little thankyou for leading you to your pathetic little boy-toy!"

She cocked her head again, and then a slow smile spread over her face. "Spike? Spike… William the Bloody with a chip in his head. I kind of love this town."

I glared at her. "You know why I really hate you, Summers?"

" 'Cause I'm a stuck-up tight-ass with no sense of fun?" she asked me sweetly.

My jaw almost dropped. "Well, yeah," I stammered, at a loss for words. It was the alcohol. I swear. "That…that covers a lot of it."

"Cause I could do anything I want, and instead, I choose to pout and whine and feel the burden of slayerness? I mean, I could be rich, I could be famous, I could have anything. Anyone…"

She swung those hips of hers closer, and I swallowed as a new scent broke through the fog of vanilla. She moved closer and I almost jumped when she put her hands on my chest, so soft and warm. Through my inebriated haze, I registered her words.

"Even you, Spike," she drawled. "I could ride you at a gallop until your legs buckled and your eyes rolled up. I've got muscles you've never even dreamed of. I could squeeze you until you popped like warm champagne, and you'd beg me to hurt you just a little bit more. And you know why I don't?"

I swallowed again. "Because of your pathetic little boy-toy?"

She smiled, pursing her lips. "Because it's _wrong_."

And then before I could do anything, she leaned up slightly and kissed me full on the lips.

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

"Dammit," Dawn cursed as she perused her new timetable. "I hate these room changes. Do you have any idea where K114 is?"

"Not a clue," Cassandra replied. "Hey, but Daniel might now?"

"You rang?" Daniel came up behind them, a broad grin on his face. "Guess what? I get International Studies this term…"

"With Melissa?" Dawn asked sweetly, while Cassandra coughed into her sleeve. "No wonder you're happy."

He had the decency to blush. "It-it's not just her, you know," he muttered. "I'm really interested."

Dawn snorted, and then returned to looking at her timetable. "Well, what do you know. I think I have art with her…"

"And Kevin," Daniel put a hand on his heart and faked a swoon, starting to talk in falsetto. "Oh Kevin, my love, we were made… ouch!"

They laughed as Dawn whacked him across the chest, this time blushing furiously herself. "Cut it out!" she whispered. "He might see us!"

"Oh, yeah, from halfway across the school," Daniel noted sardonically. "Of course. Why didn't I think of that?"

"Just stop it," Dawn whacked him again, and then in an effort to get the spotlight off her, turned to Cassandra. "So? You sharing any classes with the major hottie who makes you get that dreamy-eyed look and who you _still_ haven't told us the name of?"

Cassandra's turn to blush. Blushes all around. "Uh… well… um…"

"That's a yes," Daniel prodded, with a broad grin. "That's a yes, isn't it?"

"I think I have a class with Melissa too, actually," Cassandra averted their amused glances. "Religion."

"Hm… this sucks," Dawn complained. "We've only got English, History, and Maths with all of us together."

"Look on the bright side, at least we have some classes together," Cassandra smiled.

"True," Daniel agreed as they walked towards their lockers. "I mean, remember Opley Junior High? We had like, no classes together."

"Yeah, I remember."

They walked in companionable silence for a while as around them, students chattered and pushed as they poured from various classrooms to flock to the canteen. They deposited their bags and moved to join the crowd as the school cooks dished out various (questionably) edible foodstuffs, and then seated themselves in the corner to eat and watch. The three had established a rather strange reputation. People didn't avoid them, and they weren't part of the 'uncool' group or the 'cool' group. They seemed to have evolved out of the petty social ladder, but various people still came to sit with them sometimes to share in their conversation. Of course, some people hated them with a passion. Like Kirsty, whose sickeningly sweet smile had irritated all three of them upon meeting her.

"Hi, I'm Dawn Summers."

"Oh," Kirsty flicked her hair expertly across her shoulders. "Hi."

Her eyes raked over them with a professional's glance, and then finally settled on Daniel. "My name's Kirsty," she finally proffered.

"Nice to meet you," Daniel glanced at his watch. "Dammit… 3 o'clock. We've got to go. Nice to meet you."

And they'd instantly gone over to Spike's.

A few chance run-ins later and the immediate dislike Kirsty and Dawn developed and the contempt Kirsty layered on Cassandra grew, while she lost hope in Daniel.

"She was so hitting on you that first day," Dawn muttered.

Daniel rolled his eyes. "Right."

"It must have been you repeating 'nice to meet you' twice that put her off," Dawn joked.

"Maybe," Daniel replied in a non-committal grunt.

Cassandra had stayed silent.

As the three spoke in whispers about Spike's growing distance now, they felt Kirsty's glare on them from three tables away. Dawn rolled her eyes.

"Queen bitch alert at two o'clock."

"More like three, actually," Cassandra noted.

"Perfectionist," Dawn accused.

"Never really pretended not to be," Cassandra smiled wryly.

Midst their banter, they failed again to notice the same girl, who took a break from laughing with her friends to study them intensely, her eyes dilating as her irises flushed pure onyx with eldritch flame.

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

Sweet. She tasted so sweet as she drank me in hungrily and pushed me against the wall. I was stunned for about a second before I attacked her mouth as ferociously as she had jumped me, pushing away the instincts. God, how long had I wanted to do this? Just to feel her around me and have her as…

_Mine_.

She broke off for air, panting, and I drew in unneeded breath into my lungs as well. A slow smirk crept its way across my face. "Well, Schlayer? Looks like you've finally given in, eh?"

"Yeah," she grinned, and it was completely feral. She licked her lips. "So we goin' somewhere more private?"

We were halfway out of the alley when my instincts, suppressed before by raw lust and the alcohol and… something else I couldn't identify, burst through with a vengeance and started screaming at me. Very loud. She looked up at me as we continued kissing, and I looked back into them

_It wasn't her._

The thought slammed into me, sobered me to the point where I could make a coherent decision, and I pushed her away, but not hard enough to fire the chip. I didn't need that adding to my blurred worries. I stared at her.

"You're not Buffy."

Her eyes grew wide for a second, and then snapped frozen. "You're so drunk you don't recognize me, Spikey?" she laughed. Little bint had no idea of how much I'd studied people. Knew when they were lying.

"Who are you?" I advanced towards her. "What have you done with Buffy?"

She snapped. "Dammit! How could a bloody vampire know and not her own mum!"

She hit me, hard. I stumbled backwards, but by the time she'd gotten ready to smash the stake in, I'd processed the words she'd said and I was gone. _Joyce_. What if whoever was in Buffy's body had hurt Joyce?

8 8 8

In retrospect, maybe I should have tried to erase the alcohol from my breath when I ran as if Angelus and Darla and the not-as-nice-as-she-is-now Slayer were after me. Joyce noticed it immediately.

"Spike," she said reprovingly. "You've been drinking again. Tell me it's not because ofthat awfulDrusilla."

"Joyce," I sighed in relief, ignoring the slur on my dark goddess. "You're okay…"

And then I sized up the wreck the house was in.

"Joyce! What happened here!"

"It was Faith," she went and sat down on the couch. Most of the shattered glass had been cleared away. "I don't know what happened. She came in here, and she just wanted to talk. I think she was really confused, but then Buffy came and Faith was about to say something when Buffy just flew at her, and they started fighting…"

"What happened!"

"Just a bright flash and then the police came," Joyce shook her head. "Buffy acted a bit strange afterwards, but then she went off on patrol like usual."

I sank down on the couch with her dejectedly.

"Um… Joyce?"

"Yes Spike?"

"I met her about five minutes ago at the Bronze. Or at least, I met Buffy's body."

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

She didn't bother to be careful anymore as she hurried through the old building. What did it matter? Even if it fell in on her, that just meant maybe an extra twenty minutes digging herself out. No problem. In fact, if the rest of it fell in, that might be a good thing. Save her from having to guard herself against any pesky interferences. She finally found the room she was looking for, entered, kicked away the clinging scales that were in her way, and sat herself down.

From her bag, she quickly drew out six candles, placing them around her in a circle. Closing her eyes, she began to chant in an unearthly tone, and from beneath her, the earth groaned slowly.

Suddenly, as her chant reached its climax and she was shouting in a hoarse cry, her eyes snapped open. Her pupils were dilated, and her irises were onyx black.

8 8 8


	25. Twisted Timeframes

**Chapter 23: Twisted Timeframes**

**Disclaimer: No ownership. I've got most of the DVDs, though!**

**Rating: I think I'm boring everyone to death repeating the same thing each time. See the first fourteen chapters if you haven't, yet :)**

**A/N (Apologies for the long wait. I'm just going to blame writer's block and leave it at that, just like last time. sigh. These few chapters have been really hard to write… but thanks for the reviewing! And thanks to kim for finding the fic I was looking for.**

**: ). And thanks to both kim and Dieu Anonyme for reviewing! You two really kept me going when the writing was tough. :D. And yes. I know I was cruel to mention Riley bashing and not include any… but there will be a lot of Riley bashing in the chapter after the next one. Promise. :P. Because this time he deserves it. :D**

**Now, enjoy! And Review:P )**

8 8 8

The first indication Cassandra had that something peculiar had happened was when Buffy didn't pick them up from school.

The second indication Cassandra had that something strange was going on was when Spike wasn't at his crypt. And it was daytime. And when they usually met.

The third indication Cassandra had that something was downright bad was when they went to Revello Drive, and no-one was there. And the place was in ruins.

The fourth indication was when they found Spike, Joyce, and Giles looking extraordinarily grim at Giles' apartment.

And the fifth indication that the apocalypse or something very, very, _very_ bad was happening was that Giles and Spike weren't arguing.

"Dawnie, you're safe," Joyce pulled Dawn onto her lap. Daniel and Cassandra sat down on the floor, looking worriedly at the three adults.

"What's wrong?" Daniel demanded edgily.

"It's Buffy. She's not… Buffy. We managed to contact her at Riley's…"

"We called a meeting for tonight. The witches…"

"She's not Buffy."

Spike thumped his mug down with a… thump. Luckily, he'd already drained it of blood, or else Giles' carpet would have suffered. Strain showed in the lines around his face. "Met the bloody bint last night. Tried to come on to me. It wasn't her. It just wasn't. The Slayer doesn't talk like that. Doesn't act like that. There's something in there, and it's not the Slayer!"

"And to make it worse," Giles continued. "We've heard news from the hospital that Faith has awoken. And she visited Joyce last night. Luckily, the Council…"

Cassandra didn't need to listen to the rest of the story. "Buffy's Faith." Without realizing she'd spoken out loud, she cradled her face in her hands, thinking furiously. _What the hell? Shouldn't this have happened last year?_

"What!" Giles demanded sharply.

_Oh… this isn't good. Think, think, think, think, think! Excuse… um… crap…_

"Um with the… acting weird part… you… um… the… uh… Faith? Yeah…Um… Buffy and Faith… you know? Um… just the whole… Buffy's Faith?"

Daniel laughed in the silence of incomprehension that attacked everyone else. A short laugh, strained by the worry in his voice.

"Cass… Cassie, you're not making any sense."

"I mean… um…"

_Dammit… I can't tell them why, yet! They just need to trust me… _

Dead silence. A moment of pure and utter clarity.

_I can't believe I'm going to be able to get away with this._

"I can feel it," she said simply.

_And I can. It's not a lie. In my gut. In my mind. In my breath. In my bones. Things are different now we've come. Time has changed._

They all shared another look of incomprehension at that. "What?"

She sighed. Resisted the urge to roll her eyes. Gave up and rolled her eyes anyway.

"I can feel it. Just like I felt Dracula coming. It's the only logical… well, scrap logical, explanation."

The world erupted around her. She fainted.

_Images. Again. This time, she forced them back before anything happened. She heard laughter._

"_Well done."_

_The being glided out again, its face amused and not unkindly. _

"_Well done what?" she sat up to ease her throbbing head._

"_You figured some of it out. At least partly. We did not expect you to be so quick."_

_Irritation flashed. "What, you think I'm dumb?"_

_Musical laughter again. "Of course not. Else, we would not have seized the opportunity."_

"_Opportunity?" Daniel appeared, looking rather irate. "What's happening?"_

_Before the being could reply, there came a soundless scream, and another appeared. But she shifted in and out of focus. Glimmering green energy surrounded her. Burned from her irises. Glittered around strands of her long brown hair. Twirled from shaking fingertips, and shone inwardly from every pore of her skin. She stumbled, and Cassandra ran to support her._

"_It's okay, Dawn. It's okay. We're here." _

_She shivered, and held on to Cassandra like a lifeline._

"_Cass…I can't see."_

"_Why the hell are we here?" Daniel moved to the two of them, hovering almost protectively. "And why is Dawn blind here?"_

_The being didn't react to the hostility in his tone. "Simply because we needed to tell you that you were on the right track. And warn you."_

"_About Faith and Buffy?" Cassandra asked. "They worked out fine last time."_

"_No. About the Hellmouth."_

"_The Hellmouth?" Dawn asked shakily. "What's already not wrong with the Hellmouth?"_

_The being sighed. "Something's happening. Its force is being siphoned off, and thus the opening is getting stronger."_

"_That doesn't make sense," Dawn frowned._

"_Actually, it does. The Hellmouth is being awakened again, and with each energy-draw, it becomes stronger."_

"_Oh…"_

"_That ain't good," Daniel finished sweetly. Dawn scowled in his general direction. _

"_What is with you and not swearing these days?"_

"_Um, guys? I think he…she… um, I think they're trying to tell us the apocalypse is coming again."_

"_Indeed," the being said sourly. "It is only natural that things be different this time around, but we had not expected this."_

"_What do you mean?"_

"_Nothing," it replied blandly, but a wince in its eyes told Daniel that either it hadn't meant to divulge that or the slip had been expressly forbidden. "It is just we felt we must warn the three of you. And give the vampire, the Watcher, and the Slayer's mother time to calm down."_

"_What?"_

_Hurriedly, as if scared, the being sent them back._

8 8 8

Giles stared at the three unconscious teenagers.

"WHAT!"

Spike didn't bother. He just bolted for the door with supernatural speed, stopped somehow by Joyce who'd followed him.

"Spike, get a grip!" she snapped, the blood drained from her face. "We've got to plan this out rationally…"

She didn't step back when he growled at her, unconsciously changing to gameface. "Will you do any good by waltzing out there now? You don't even know where Buffy or Faith are!"

Her words were a sharp slap back into reality, and the vampiric visage slipped from his features, leaving his blue eyes icy chips.

"I planned to smell her out," he snarled.

"Faith will have Buffy's scent. And besides, I already told you that Fai… dear lord."

"What?" Joyce demanded.

"Faith… Buffy… remember? The… Council have taken her. We have to go after her immediately!"

"That's what I was going to do!" Spike roared in frustration.

"Well you won't get very far without directions!" Giles grabbed his coat. "Joyce, stay here and look after them in case they wake up. Keep in direct network with Willow, Tara, Xander, and Anya. Spike, we need to get to the Watcher's Airport _quickly_.

"I'm not staying behind!"

"Where the bloody hell is that?"

Giles sighed and put his head in his hands. From behind him, the three teenagers stirred and groaned, having been largely forgotten.

"Oh God, my head," Dawn muttered.

Joyce rushed to her. "Baby… are you alright?"

As much as Spike ached to stay behind to make sure the Juniors were okay, his unbeating heart knew that they were safe with Joyce. He and Giles nodded, and bolted for the door, one flying under a blanket.

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

"We've been holed up in here for three hours, now," Weatherby complained irritably as he and Smith watched Collins on the phone. "Bloody hell, I just hope they _can't_ give us passage. Can't stand the bitch thumping away in the back there."

Smith glared at him. "You know, I'm starting to think that…"

"They can't get us passage," Collins interrupted them. He screwed a silencer onto a pistol. "They've ordered the kill."

Weatherby nodded his grim agreement. "Torch the place?"

"Get the gas," Collins affirmed.

"Whoah… hang on a sec," Smith walked in front of them. "She could've killed me. She didn't."

"Lucky you."

Faith stilled as she heard their voices talk so casually around her. The truck closed in on her as she heard Collins' heavy breathing come even closer. She had to move now. And fast.

Collins stuck the gun through the bars, the metal weapon illuminated against the wall. As he moved to pull the trigger, Faith scissored her feet around the pistol and his hands and pulled him into the truck, hard enough to stun him. With a swift movement, she shot the locks and chains that were holding her, and leapt out of the truck. Exulting.

Freedom!

Smith looked in terror as the Slayer materialized out of nowhere and ran to the driver's compartment, shooting another lock. "Weatherby!"

"Keys, keys," Faith muttered desperately.

"Stop her, you ponce!" Weatherby swore as he rushed the truck. Faith yelled in triumph as she found the keys, and then opened the door into the Council official knocking him out.

"Ok, I'm good at this," she grinned, strained. She shifted gears randomly, until the light lit, and she smiled in triumph. "Ooh, drive."

Smith fired random shots at the truck as she drove out through the wooden wall, smashing it into splinters, and out towards the road of freedom.

8 8 8

"That's the Council truck!" Giles exclaimed.

"Sodding hell!" Spike swore as he cowered underneath the steaming blanket. "Then slow down!"

They pulled across the road, and Faith cursed as the car blocked her way, before grinning happily.

"Giles! Um…" her initial elation faded as his grave look "Oh… uh… I'm not who you think."

"On the contrary, you are," he said with a smile, and threw aside British reserve and hugged her.

Spike watched the reunion from the safe cover of the car and his blanket. And something ached within him. He pushed it away. A Master Vampire worrying about the Slayer… no way. Not possible. Uh-uh. Inconceivable. Just wanted… ah, that was it. Not some stupid poncey officials offing her. When he got the chip out of his head, then he'd send her to a fitting death.

_But you don't want to…_A little voice needled him at the back of his head.

_Shut up!_ He snarled back, and returned to his state of denial.

Faith and Giles returned to the car, animatedly talking.

"Mum's okay? Bloody hell, I was so worried she'd get hurt. We need to find her, Giles. Find her, and get our bodies switched back _somehow_. And tell Willow, Tara, Xander and Anya… God, is Dawn and the rest okay? I was supposed to pick them up… When did you guys last see her? How did you guys _know?_ And… what's _Spike_ doing here? And… I'm babbling, aren't I?"

"Well, no, apart from the fact you managed to get that lot out in about five seconds," Spike drawled. Something in him was dancing. _She talked like me and didn't even notice it!_ "Good to see you again. Well… at least… you know."

Faith just stared. The last day had been a blur of confusion and fear. First, the bodyswap. The magics that had ripped her out of her own body and bound her to the prison of another, and the police and Council swapover… not to mention the hours in the stinking back of the truck, chained to the wall. The fact that Giles had come out here was amazing enough. But… _Spike?_

"What are you doing here?" she asked again.

Spike raised his eyebrows, and then looked at Giles. "Watcher? I think she's in a state of shock here."

"I am _not_ in a state of…" Faith started indignantly, but was bundled into the car by Giles.

"We need to get back and figure out where the _real_ Faith is. She could be anywhere."

"Yeah," Faith slipped into Slayer mode. She could deal with everything later. "She could have carted my body off to Mexico by now…"

Something flashing on the radio caught Spike's attention. "Watcher," he interrupted. "Turn the radio up louder."

"Spike, this is not a time…"

"Just _do_ it!"

Giles grumbled, but did so.

"… and barricaded themselves in the church with at least 20 parishioners. One of the few who escaped described the women as frighteningly disfigured, almost inhuman. So far, two escapees have since died of severe neck wounds. There is no report on the condition of the parishioners still trapped inside, but the assailants have vowed to kill all of them if police attempt to storm the church."

The report ended, and the car was silently stunned.

"Wait a minute, this has happened before," Faith said slowly. "Those three vampires went ballistic, but I got all of them."

"Two female vampires enough to reign it over twenty parishioners? I would have thought more than one would have escaped," Spike mused.

"It doesn't matter. We gotta get there and stop…"

It was the day of interruptions. Giles' mobile phone suddenly began to ring merrily. He blushed. Spike and Faith both stared.

"Giles? You watch Gilligan's Island?"

"Watcher? You have a _life_?"

"Oh shut up," he muttered irritably, before replying. His face immediately became grave once more.

"Yes… I see. How did you…? Never mind, we'll compare notes later. You have it, then? Good work! I must say, excellent! Meet us at the church… we'll be there in about five minutes. Hurry. We'll distract the police again somehow. Let's just hope that they are still there. Good. See you there, then."

8 8 8

They were silent. Completely pale and bloodless, with long blue hair melting over vampiric features as they stalked around the congregation.

One of them touched the cross. Caressed it. Then smiled as she looked at her unblemished hands.

8 8 8


	26. Faceoff

**Chapter 24: Face/off**

**Disclaimer: No ownership. I've got most of the DVDs, though!**

**Rating: I think I'm boring everyone to death repeating the same thing each time. See the first fourteen chapters if you haven't, yet :)**

**(Apologies _again_ for the long wait. I'm going to blame writer's block and leave it at that, just like last time. sigh. These few chapters have been really hard to write… but thanks for the reviewing! And thanks to BAKAMAN for reviewing! Hmm… Vamp Illyria? Don't really know the Angel series that well (although I plan to) but I'll leave that to your imagination. :P. And rest assured, all those who love Riley bashing. There will be plenty in the next chapter. :P. Because this time he deserves it. :D**

**Now, enjoy! And Review:P )**

8 8 8

"_You two are not fighting over me like a bone," I spit. "I'm a person. A goddamn, person! You see, I've learnt a lot from you two in the last year. Learnt a lot _about_ you as well. And you," I point at her, "Are an arrogant, holier-than-thou, self-righteous bitch."_

_She takes the words in her stride. "Oh yeah? Well you're just a crazy psychopathic bitch who went to the dark side. Where does that leave the both of us?"_

_I grin at her fire, because I feel it too, and then turn to him. "And you? You were funny. Kind. Gentle. You took care of me. Never hit me. Never hurt me. You loved me."_

"_As a daughter, Faith," he smiles. "I see that you've finally found out. You've finally made your decision."_

"_Yeah," I agree. "Because I've realized another thing. Want, take, have? Only applies when it's something worth wanting. Which means I gotta balance up the good side and the bad side. You see, you were a father to me. But you also wanted to become a demon and potentially destroy the world, and where would that leave me? Because, and I think B has realized this as well, being a Slayer isn't what you told me. Being a Slayer isn't about being sassy and having the best X-box. It's about saving the world. Keeping the balance between man and demons. How am I going for the inspirational speech, B?"_

_She grins as his jaw drops. "Fairly well, I'd say."_

_I can see that he's stunned. My heart wrenches, but I keep going anyway. "I'm sorry, boss," I whisper. "I love you too."_

_I turn around, and smile at B. She smiles back, and then gives me one of her famous glares._

"_You still have a lot of crap to work through," she tells me._

"_Don't I know it."_

_And then, most comfortingly of all, I feel my own knife coalesce in my hand. I lift it, and stare in wonder. The hilt is burnished copper, studded with onyx, striped black and white with strands of grey that curl around each thread._

_And I smile._

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

The 11 o'clock service in the morning had definitely been interrupted.

"You wouldn't believe this," Kyrel purred as she circled the terrified congregation. "If you hadn't touched it…"

"Felt it," hissed Thess, her fingers elongating into claws and then shifting back again. "It's jackpot, honey. She's done it!"

"So…" mused Kyrel as she ran her index down a parishioner's cheek. "What do we do with the cattle now?"

"I don't know," Thess smiled languidly.

The very air seemed saturated with fear as the two vampiresses moved sinuously around the seated people. Now, the atmosphere shifted as their movements became more predatory. They had fulfilled their mission. Now, it was time for play. The stained glass windows filtered out most of the sunlight.

"Maybe we could set them free? Give them a five second head start?"

"I don't know… how about we just start the killing?"

"Or, how about we sit down for a nice cup of tea and work things out?" a pleasant voice interrupted them.

They both turned around abruptly, to see a statuesque Slayer with rippling dark hair cascading down her shoulders smiling at them. "Do you guys ever get tired of this?" she demanded. "I mean, some of you tried the same thing last year. And that had a dusty ending, so hey…"

"You."

"Yeah, me," Faith grinned. "Nice to meet…"

Before Faith could even finish speaking, the two vampiresses had launched themselves at her with such blinding speed they were a blur to her Slayer-attuned eyes. She stumbled backwards, collected herself, and then attacked brutally back. Kick, punch, swing.

"Psst."

Silence. Just the bone-jarring blows of the Slayer and the two vampiresses. He allowed himself a quick glance at her. She was holding her own. Good.

"Psst!"

No-one noticed. They were still riveted on the fight in shock and horror and morbid fascination. He lost the little patience he had, and transferred to gameface.

"EVERYBODY GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE!"

That did it. People in shock responded well to more fear, he though wryly. Although this lot would probably be in counselling for a long time…

He shook himself angrily as they poured out of the door. Why would he _care_?

Before he could fume and berate himself more, he head Faith let out a cry of pain. Instantly, without thought, he flew to the noise. And saw what had happened.

The two couldn't have been more than fledgelings… but they were giving the Slayer a run for her money. It could have been the strange body, but… judging by the way they'd managed to combine efforts ruthlessly and throw her across the church to smash into a row of pews and then bear down on her suggested that that wasn't the case…

8 8 8

The fangs were coming down. Faith couldn't believe it. What the hell had happened? Was her training off? Was it just this body? The aching that her soul, her being felt every moment away from where her true shell was? She cast a desperate look for Spike. Where was he?

Right there.

He snarled maniacally as he ripped Thess away, but she wasn't so easily dissuaded. Snarling, she launched herself at a very, very angry master vampire, effectively tangling him up even as he roared in frustration. With superhuman speed, he dodged under Thess' defences and staked her, but too late… Kyrel struck Faith another blow, and then bent down…

A blur sped out of nowhere and hurled the vampiress into a heap of splintered pews, where she dusted immediately. Faith regained her wits, only to see Buffy looking back at her, dried tears streaking her eyes. And then Buffy clasped hands with Faith, and they were lost in a flash of green light so overpowering Spike stumbled backwards.

"_This…"_

_Buffy stared around. She was in her own body again, and she could see Faith standing in front of her, silhouetted against the light pouring in from a nearby window. She smiled at her._

"_Hey, B."_

"_Faith…" Buffy shook her head, confused. "Why? What happened there?"_

_Faith grinned, and turned around. "Sit," she gestured to the newly made bed. It was as white as clouds, gentle satin that breathed around their skin. Hesitatingly, she sat, all the while studying the dark slayer._

"_So? Spill. What's happened? Why'd you save me?"_

_A veil of indecisiveness ghosted across Faith's features for a second, but then it passed. "Long story, B. Let's just say that I figured out some things. You were right you know."_

_She held up her hand as Buffy moved to interrupt. "I don't think so, hero-gal. It's my turn to make a speech here."_

_A small smile curved on Buffy's face. "Hero-gal? Hardly."_

"_Yeah, well, you are you know. Saving the world and all. Anyway, you were right. I could hear you sometimes when you came to visit me. I think something happened, though. I feel as if I slept too long. I've been in a coma for the last two years, haven't I? Just feel way too… I don't know. Like I've just slept too long. Shoulda been about one year, shouldn't it?"_

_Buffy frowned. "I get what you mean. That feeling. But I don't understand why you've changed so much. I… when I talked to you…"_

"_You spilled your heart out to me, B," Faith cut her off. "The stuff that only Slayers can understand. And vampires. The hunter and the hunted, the predator and the prey, right?"_

_Buffy smiled again. "When did you get so smart?"_

"_Somewhere in between the freaky dreams," Faith deadpanned dryly. "Or it could have been the day I dropped out of school. Best decision I made in my life."_

"_Kinda miss having a normal school," Buffy sighed. "You know, in the days…"_

"_When you weren't a Slayer," Faith wrinkled her nose. "Come on, B. If there's one thing that still irritates me about you, it's the fact that you still haven't caught on."_

"_What do you mean?" _

"_Admit it. You know that you love the hunt, the kill. You wouldn't want the normalness. Normality's boring."_

_The blonde slayer glared at her. "No, you're wrong."_

"_Don't think so," Faith smirked. "Otherwise I wouldn't be getting such a reaction out of you, would I? Being a Slayer isn't a job. It's part of you. You know that if you didn't have the cool powers you'd be out there trying to stop the baddies simply cos you want your family and friends to be safe. And the hunt, remember? You slay the best when you're all worked up, and don't deny it because you told me that at least three times."_

_Buffy opened her mouth, closed it, opened her mouth again, and then closed it._

"_Nice with the goldfish imitation, B," Faith grinned, amused. "Anyway, your first question? I dunno. I just finally realized what you and your friends are all on about. When… when I was in your body, I was…"_

_Now it was the brunette's turn to struggle for words. She finally hit upon one._

"_Accepted," Faith breathed. "And… it's like… I was…"_

_She couldn't even say the words. _

"_Loved," Buffy murmured. "You felt loved."_

"_Loved again," Faith nodded. "It's just… you know the Mayor? He… he loved me."_

"_He tried to become a big snake and rule over the world," Buffy said softly._

"_I know, dammit!" snarled Faith. "But he loved me. I know he did. That's why he sent me the body-swap thing. To give me a chance. A chance at life. But it's just… you've showed me I can have a chance. And then your friends… it just…"_

"_You want to make good, huh?"_

"_Yeah," Faith swung around, frustrated. "Man, that just sounds so cheesy…"_

"_Heh, it does, doesn't it?" Buffy agreed, then her tone grew serious. "Well? How are you going to start?"_

"_A-angel," Faith stammered out. "It's just… he's gone through the same things I have, right? And… and you're not together anymore, right?"_

"_No, I'm not," Buffy stated, and she was surprised that it only twinged a little. "I think I'm getting over him."_

_Faith gave her a soul-searching look. "No you haven't," she said bluntly. "You're not even close."_

"_I'll get there, though," Buffy parried. "I can't believe that I'm saying this, but I know… I think I always knew we weren't gonna be a forever thing…"_

_The brightly lit room started to vanish around them._

"_What the hell?" Faith exclaimed._

_Buffy smiled faintly. "I think someone decided we both needed to face some home truths."_

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

"Slayer? Slayer! You alright? Dammit! Bloody hell!"

I woke woozily to shouting, wondering dazedly what had happened. Then I saw it. Two fiercely glittering azure eyes that danced as I opened mine and looked up at them blearily.

"Uh…"

"Lie down Slayer, don't try to talk. The vamps are gone. Miss. Sunshine over there is still fast asleep. We're at the Watcher's…"

Abruptly, the eyes moved away, and I wanted them to come back instantly. They were my connection to this place. I heard loud noises mixed with hushed whispers that echoed inside my head as a prelude to the headache I knew was bound to come. But, strangely enough, I felt safe. I belonged here. In this body. And the beautiful eyes that were so concerned had returned, and the smooth voice with that gorgeous accent that called me Slayer…

Hang on a sec.

Wait…

"Spike!" I shrieked, and sat bolt upright as everything came rushing back. They were the thoughts of a confused person, I comforted myself. A very, very, very confused person who had just undergone the bodyswap. Yes. That was the reason. Safe? Smooth? Beautiful? Gorgeous? Not words I would use to describe our favourite pain-in-the-ass. No… not even on those…

No. Stopping evil thoughts. Right now. Right…

"Whoah, calm down, Slayer. Yeah, it's Spike…"

"Are you alright, Buffy? You look a bit dazed…"

"Well of course she's dazed, Watcher," Spike snorted. "She just switched bodies again. And been unconscious for seven bloody hours."

"I didn't ask for your opinion, Spike," Giles said absentmindedly. Even through my somewhat 'dazed' mindset, I could still see Spike's eyes harden as he looked away, and my heart clenched involuntarily before I shrugged it away. Heart palpitations. From stress. Yeah.

"Faith's alright?" I croaked

"She's fine," Giles assured me. "Now we both need to get you out of here before the police become too curious."

I don't know how we got out of there. I imagine Spike carried me, somehow wrapped under a blanket, because the last thing I sensed was the smell of him; leather and smoke and danger. Giles probably dragged Faith. But as I collapsed, I knew that everything was alright. In a way. There was something nagging at the back of my mind…

But then I fell unconscious before I could deduce what it was.

Funny, that.

8 8 8


	27. Old Wounds

**Chapter 25: Old Wounds**

**Disclaimer: No ownership. I've got most of the DVDs, though!**

**Rating: I think I'm boring everyone to death repeating the same thing each time. See the first fourteen chapters if you haven't, yet :)**

**(Apologies for the long wait. I'm just going to blame writer's block and leave it at that, just like last time. sigh. These few chapters have been really hard to write… but thanks to kim for reviewing! Yes, she is indeed beginning to figure him out… or so she thinks. : ). But please, more reviews, people! I'd say one of the reasons I took so long with this one because of lack of motivation, which is somewhat cured miraculously by reviews! So yes, please! Doesn't take too long…**

**And also, drumroll the long awaited Riley bashing chapter. So enjoy! And Review:P )**

8 8 8

"I can't believe you were _that_ late for church. Again," Willow raised her eyebrow at Riley.

He looked away. "I was busy. Where's Buffy?"

"She, Giles, and the bleached wonder are coming. They just need to clean something up," Xander said softly.

"Spike?" Riley's guard instantly shot up. "What's he doing with them?"

Before anyone could answer him, Tara moved quietly into the room. "They're coming now. I can see the lights of Giles' car."

A still seemed to come over Revello Drive as Riley checked his growing anger and waited impatiently. The car wheels snickered over the driveway impossibly slowly. Three teenagers prepared themselves to eavesdrop. One mother sat down on the couch, exhausted. The glass had long since been swept up, and the shredded curtains replaced with stronger material, shutting out the night. As the door opened, a chill wind seeped through, announcing the return of two weary humans and one thinking (no, not brooding, _thinking_) vampire. Riley pounced on them immediately.

"Okay, I'm sorry if I'm sounding too forwards about this, but what is happening? No-one's explained anything. And why's he helping you!"

"Sod off, Soldier Boy," Spike spat bitterly as he collapsed into the armchair. "Need a smoke, and I didn't see you rushing around all day after your mortal enemy."

Anyone could have seen Riley was just looking for a fight. The blonde didn't care. Riley was across the room in a flash, but before he even got there, Spike had vacated the armchair like lightning and laughed harshly as the soldier fell flat on his face.

"Try it, why don't you?" he jeered, anger lacing his voice. "You're no match for me, Whitebread, and if you hadn't…"

"Stop the threats, Spike," Buffy said sharply. "Let me deal with this."

Spike subsided as he realized that her irritation wasn't aimed directly at him. He leaned against a convenient piece of wall and pushed his frustration down. All day long it had been nagging him. Hell, ever since he first betrayed Adam. And now, it was eating away at him from the inside…

He concentrated on enjoying the Slayer put Captain Cardboard in his place, which she proceeded to do so.

"When was the last time you saw me, Riley?"

"T-this morning, when I left for church and you came along, and then we heard of the vampire attack and you wouldn't let me come in after you. Then the police arrived and I got tangled up trying to keep them out of there, so I didn't see you after that."

It wasn't the wrong answer. But it wasn't the right one either. The second Buffy had walked into the house, she'd known. One glance had been enough.

8 8 8

"_Oh… and B?"_

_They were standing at the train station, farewelling Faith as she made her way to L.A and Angel. They'd deal with the Council later. They'd deal with everything later. Now, it was time for cleaning up._

"_Yeah, Faith?"_

_Faith bit her lip, and then looked straight into her eyes. "Riley has something to tell you. And… I'm sorry."_

_Buffy nodded. Faith jumped onto the train and sped off. Spike's all-seeing eyes zeroed in on her._

"_I wonder what that meant, pet," he drawled. There was an underlying anger in his voice, but she didn't notice it. She was making her own conclusions._

"_Let's just go home," she whispered, and walked back to Giles' car. The starlight trickled from above._

8 8 8

"You slept with her, Riley."

The accusation flew from my lips like daggers, and I knew it. Riley actively flinched, before he collected his wits.

"What are you talking about?"

God, I wanted to cry. I wanted to bawl my eyes out. Wanted to run to Mum… sitting there on the couch looking shocked. Wanted Willow to hug me and say it was alright. Wanted Xander to crack some goofball joke that would smooth over the hurt. Wanted Giles to say something Gilesish, clean his glasses, and then pat her awkwardly. Wanted Dawn to annoy me so I could snap at her and then we could spend hours sitting on her bed, me combing her hair and the both of us spilling out our dreams. Wanted Spike to piss me off and then make everything better with a smirk and a reassurance disguised as a snark. Wanted…

I wanted.

Simple as that.

Just some security, some comfort in the face of all the madness that was overwhelmingly. My Slayer senses had had me constantly on edge for the last month with the knowledge that something was happening. Then Spike and Adam, and Spike. And the confusion. Then Riley, Dracula. The Spell… Cassandra and Daniel popping out of nowhere… Riley's heart… Faith, the bodyswap… too many in too few days. And now this.

"Willow, Xander, Tara, Anya?" I ignored him and looked at them. "If you don't mind, I'll debrief you guys later. We've got some research to do on some new vamps."

"Right on it, Buff," Xander nodded. His face was sober, almost drawn tonight. I wondered what had happened, but pushed it to the back of my mind. All I could tell was that perhaps I hadn't been the only one to have been shown a few home truths.

Willow and I shared a long glance, and Tara connected for the briefest of seconds, and then they were gone into the night. Xander following them.

"Good luck," Anya said frankly, before running after Xander.

The house was quiet. Mum was silent on the couch. Giles stood nervously, unsure.

"Giles, could you show them where to research?"

"Of course, Buffy," he said quietly.

Silence. Dammit. Silence was difficult to work around. It spread into your bones like cold snow, frosted it like ice. Mum sensed it. Sensed the space. Sensed the need to vent. I almost burst into tears. Mum could always read people, couldn't she? Why couldn't I? I almost chuckled bitterly. Miss. Blind Spot, that was me.

"Buffy, I think I'll go upstairs and have a rest. It's been a long day, and I have to get to the gallery early tomorrow. I'm… just glad you're okay."

"I am too, Mum."

I swore I heard a quick clattering as Mum climbed the stairs, and I rolled my eyes. Spike caught it, and smiled somewhat tiredly to affirm my suspicions.

"The Juniors," he nodded. "I'll… go up and check on them."

He started to move, but I stopped him. "No," I surprised myself. "You're staying here. Just to show Riley something."

Riley had stood still for this entire time after he'd untangled himself from the armchair. Now, he moved.

"Okay, Buffy, I think I have the right to know what's going on." he demanded angrily.

I laughed harshly. "You know what, Riley? I'm amazed you didn't figure it out! Tell me, was I acting at all strangely last night? Did I know your name? Was it strange I didn't go out and patrol?"

"But you did," Riley blinked. "You went on patrol at about 11 o'clock after we… and then you came back…"

Something slowly dawned on his face as he stared at my anger and Spike's cold brittleness. He sat down in the armchair.

"It… it wasn't you?" he choked out. "No, that's not possible…"

"Haven't you learnt by now that a lot of things are possible, Riley?" I rolled my eyes. "Hmm, let's see. The enjoining spell. Willow and Tara's experiments. Did you think that demons were really animals like the army told you? That's stupid, and you know that!"

"But…" his eyes swung around desperately. Had he known? Should he have been suspicious? The questions painted themselves over his features. The words came tumbling out of his mouth as sudden self-doubt clouded his eyes. "But…"

The words came out so pathetically weak he winced himself. "How was I supposed to know?"

The silence was deafening. He could have taken a knife and stabbed me, right in the heart there. Right in the soft tissue, that would leave a deeper scar amidst the already mangled mess Angel had made. But it cut less than I would have expected. God, if I actually loved Riley, I think…

Wait.

What was that thought?

_God, if I actually loved Riley…_

_**No.**_

_Wait a second, that _can't_ be right. I… I didn't just think that. No, I didn't. Not at all, no, no, no…_

What was the use of trying? I knew it, Riley probably knew it, and as Spike's keen blue eyes suddenly zeroed in on mine, I knew that he definitely knew it.

Denial decided to drown me. _What's it doing here? Thought it was in Africa. Hahahaha… _Lame joke. Brain gone kablooey. That's all the defence I can muster. I pushed up out of it and locked it in a box. To be dealt with later. I had this huge rage boiling around my ears at the moment. Time to deal with that _now_.

"Riley, do you know who Faith is?" I asked calmly. Considering I was ready to tear his guts out and… oh God, I was sounding like Spike. I quickly stopped that thought. I wasn't _that_ angry. Yet. Was I?

Riley's brow furrowed. "Faith… Faith. The other Slayer, right? The one in a coma? What about her?"

I felt sugar lace my voice. I couldn't quite believe it. I'd never acted like this before. But boy, was I _mad_.

"She came out of the coma sometime yesterday," I let my voice harden again, back to its normal tone. God, I sounded so sickeningly sweet before, even I was irritated. "Now, I guess I'll see if you can put it together."

He did. Slowly, with dawning horror in his eyes. "But… that's not possible!"

"_Riley,"_ I said, dangerously.

Anger flared up in his eyes, suddenly. "Boy, would I like to get my hands on her!"

Spike's famous raised eyebrow shot up, and he was about to make a comment when I stop him. Riley gulped and back-pedalled. "In a non-sexual way, of course."

"Why is it her fault, soldier boy?" Spike asked contemptuously, exhaling smoke. I realized he's lit a cigarette, even though he knows he's not allowed to. He smirked at me, and then looked back to Riley. "She was confused, looking for love, a bit of physical comfort and all that rot. All I'm saying is, how did you not know your own girlfriend?"

That's the question that was bubbling away inside of me so painfully I thought I might explode. How did he not know? How? If Spike knew… If Spike…

Spike.

"But she was so…" Riley protested, but we all knew he couldn't say anything. His head slumped. "I'm an idiot, I should have known."

"Yeah," I threw back. "You really should have."

He looked at me then, hearing in my voice that I wasn't quite finished yet, which I wasn't. His familiar eyes that were so full of pain and confusion and realization were haunting. I almost wilted for a few seconds, but didn't. I was still too angry at what my mind had just realized, and why I had unconsciously kept Spike handy for this little conversation.

"Why?" he stood up from where he had been slowly shrinking into the chair. "I… she played her part well, Buffy. And I didn't sleep with her. I slept with _you_."

The sudden conviction in his voice threw me, and the anger built again. "No you didn't, Riley," I snapped back. "You slept with her while I was in another body being carted off to the Council, and Giles and Spike had to come and save me."

"Although if I recall," Spike coughed, as if the smoke had actually affected his undead lungs, "You were doing a pretty good job of rescuing yourself."

A compliment from Spike? I almost fainted. Well, not really. But you know what I meant.

"Wait…" Riley was looking more and more confused, but that didn't make me feel sorry. "How did you know?"

I was about to open my mouth when Spike swaggered into the spotlight and pushed me gently out. "I'll tell you how I knew, Whitebread. I was in the Bronze when the bloody Slayer came on to…"

In an instant, Riley was up and at him. Spike, a devilish smile on his face, danced sideways again. "Me," he smoothly finished the sentence. "I thought she was drunk at first, but then…"

"You touched her," Riley glared at him full of hatred and revulsion. "God, you touched her! No wonder you're so angry, Buffy!" he turned to me, a half-pleading half-pitying look on his face. "But why take it out on me?"

"Haven't finished yet, Soldier Boy," Spike smirked. "Was all gettin' hot and bothered when…"

That deliberate taunt was enough to get Riley moving again, but this time I stopped him. "Quit with the unnecessary details, Spike," I said. "Just get on with it."

"When I realized that it wasn't actually the Slayer," Spike finished, staring accusingly into Riley's eyes. "So I started fighting with her, yelling at her as to where the real Slayer was, but then she mentioned Joyce, so I ran to check up on her."

"You believe that, Buffy?" Riley snorted incredulously. "You actually _believe_ that?"

"Well, yeah," I replied, fixing him with my own stare. "Considering he alerted Giles and my Mum and helped to rescue me. So tell me, Riley. How is it my mortal enemy for the last couple of years recognized that it wasn't me, when my boyfriend didn't?"

Riley fish-mouthed.

I walked away, out into the night before I acted on my instinct to kill him in a horribly painful way.

8 8 8


	28. What Lies Beneath

**Chapter 26: What lies beneath…**

**Disclaimer: No ownership. I've got most of the DVDs, though!**

**Rating: I think I'm boring everyone to death repeating the same thing each time. See the first fourteen chapters if you haven't, yet :)**

**(Ah, thanks to Dieu Anonyme! You gave me the motivation to get this one out quickly! Amazing, reviews. I swear, they're the medicine for writer's block. And yes, Dieu Anonyme, I wrote this chapter for your thirst of Riley-bashing, only for those who don't like Riley-bashing, I'm still attempting to be level-headed. He's kind of stressed at the moment, and as we saw in Season 4, that tends to make him act irrationally.**

**But please, more reviews, people! I'm going to be away for about a week or so, and if I come back they'll be the only thing I'll be able to live on!**

**Okay, enjoy!)**

8 8 8

"What are you waiting for, you prick?" I snorted. "Aren't you gonna go after her?"

I didn't need a hand in this, but I couldn't resist tweaking it a little bit. Oh, the things I could have said… but Cardboard had screwed it all up nicely himself. Still, I wished I could rub it in a little more…

The idiot gave me the chance.

He rounded on me, fists clenched and a vein in his temple throbbing. "You did this, didn't you? Set me up…"

Oh the irony of that statement, I wanted to laugh out loud, but instead, I closed my eyes for a fraction of a second and revelled in… I wasn't quite sure what, actually. Outwardly, I could hear him begin to rant about some conspiracy plot, and smirked. _Ah yes, you can take the boy out of the army but you can't take the army out of the boy._

I cut him off in mid-rant "Tell me, Soldier Boy, why would I bother? It's not exactly like I have that kind of time on my hands, I've got to help the Slayer with patrolling…"

The look on his face was priceless.

"After all, you've messed it up nicely yourself…"

He swung, and I dodged, laughing now as I read his face. Like an open book it was. Bloody boring, too. If he'd been a novel I woulda ripped it up long ago and mocked the author for being worse than I used to be. "Oh, I see," I smirked again. "That's the way it goes. There's been trouble in paradise recently, hasn't there?"

His eyes turned black with fury, and I chuckled.

"Oh, hang on a minute. Longer than that? Been brewing ever since… ah, ever since Draccy. Or before? When you met?"

"Shut up, creature," he spat as he lunged. "You don't know anything about…"

_Oh, but I do. See, I watch. But no-one ever sees me watching. No-one but the moon and the stars._

I skipped neatly aside, but not before his fist grazed me and I winced slightly. A demon the other night had managed to bruise me, but he obviously thought his paltry blow had actually hurt, and he when he regained balance, he swung again, faster this time as he gained confidence.

_I can't believe you don't ever see it, **boy**. Of course, you wouldn't know me. I'm just a creature to you, aren't I? You wouldn't know the glory of the hunt, you wouldn't know the fierce joy of the kill. That's between the Slayer and me, and you can't touch that, can you?_

I cursed my chip.

8 8 8 8 8 8

"Did this happen before?" Daniel whispered so Dawn couldn't here.

"No, it…" Cass replied, before stopping as Dawn turned around from the window and faced them almost half-defiantly.

"I don't mind the fact that she's mad at Riley," she announced. "I just can't believe the fact that he didn't know her from that 'ho!"

"It sounds like he does feel sorry, though," Daniel murmured thoughtfully.

"Well, yeah," Dawn relented. "But still! How could you not tell the difference! Buffy's all like 'I'm the Slayer and I can do backflips so you better listen to me', and Faith's all like 'I'm a bad girl and I want to…'"

Crash!

They froze in their positions.

"What was…?"

From below, they heard muted yelling and swearing. Quickly, Dawn's face lit up with a potent mix of fear and anger.

"Spike!"

They clattered down the stairs, just in time to see Riley swing again and Spike evade, barely. The Master Vampire was growing frustrated at his inability to hit back.

"Spike!" Dawn and Cassandra shrieked again as they launched themselves at Riley. Aided by the distraction, Spike leapt lithely in and held Riley against the wall, not hard enough to hurt or make the chip fire, but hard enough so that the ex-soldier was pinned.

Riley was breathing heavily. "Get out of here, Dawn, Cassie, Dan. This isn't your business."

"I beg to differ," Daniel stepped behind the bleached blonde.

"Buffy is _my_ sister, and Spike is _our_ friend," Dawn followed suit. "How does that not make it our business?"

"Go to your room," Riley tried.

"Why the hell should we listen to you?" Cassandra demanded furiously. "I mean, apart from you being Buffy's boyfriend…"

Spike growled.

"And the fact that you've severely pissed her off," Cass added hurriedly. "And my name is _Cassandra_. You have no right to call me Cassie. Or Cass. They're reserved for friends."

She smiled as defiance coursed through her veins as she stopped stuttering half-incoherently. It felt _good_. But none of them noticed.

"Go to your room," Riley whispered again, but he sounded defeated. He slumped in Spike's hold as he watched them listlessly.

"Or not," Dawn snorted.

"Juniors," Spike said, deceptively calm. "Thanks for your help here, but go to Nibblet's room now. I'll speak to you later."

Before they even thought about it, they were halfway to the staircase.

Riley stared at him in disbelief.

"It's a spell, isn't it?" he demanded furiously. "It's a spell and you've cast it over all of them…"

Spike chuckled harshly. "Yeah, well if I could find a spell like that you'd be dead already. Call it my natural charm, will you?"

Riley began to struggle. "Natural charm? You're an animal…"

Spike's unrelenting hold tightened, sending warning tingles into his brain, but he ignored them. It felt so good to have his enemy writhing under his grip, to smell the fear that he was trying to mask. He slowly morphed into game-face, and the fear heightened.

"You can't hurt me," Riley said defiantly. "The chip…"

Spike's golden eyes fixed on his, unblinking, and Riley unconsciously attempted to meld himself into the wall with the pure intensity in them. The fire.

"Chip or no," Spike enunciated softly. "The next time you threaten me and mine, I will rip your head off and drink, long and deep."

"You and yours?"

Spike's eyes went an even darker shade of gold as he growled, ridges rippling menacingly. "You know what I mean."

"They're not yours," Riley, newly incensed, swung at him. In the close proximity, Spike just took the blow without flinching, raising his scarred eyebrow. He was getting tired of this… he had to talk to the Juniors and then find Buffy. The vampire contemptuously released his hold, and ducked the punch he saw coming a mile away.

"They're mine more than they'll ever be yours," Spike mocked. "And shouldn't you be running after your girl around now?"

One last, murderous look. "You can't touch me. Stay away from all of them."

"Or what?" drawled Spike.

Riley almost gave in to his rage again, even though inside he knew that he wasn't so much angry at the vampire as he was at his own failure. Instead, he declined to take the tantalizing bait.

"One day," he promised, before sprinting out the door.

"One day?" Spike asked out loud, disbelievingly. "Of all the movie clichés…"

He heard footsteps pattering upstairs, and he sighed.

8 8 8

_Oh…_

"You know, Juniors, I don't really have anything against you lot eavesdropping, but not when it's something like t his."

Dawn's chin jutted out defiantly. "But…"

He looked them over. "Now, I don't really have time for this conversation at the moment. But mark my words, I will when I've finished running after your sister."

And with that, he was gone.

There was a silence in the room for a few seconds. "That wasn't really fair," Daniel muttered.

Cass watched Dawn's face. "S-sorry… should we go?" she stuttered.

A weary smile graced Dawn's face. "You don't have to."

"But we probably should," Cassandra hugged her friend impulsively. "You let us know when it's okay, won't you?"

Dawn nodded. "Yeah."

As Cassandra dragged Daniel away, Dawn peered out of the window again. It took her about five minutes for her mind to register something. Darkness. A sudden thought chased into her mind.

_Daniel and Cassandra are walking back to Giles' in the dark!_

As she began to panic, an inner voice seeped into her from nowhere, calming her. Instantly, her mind seemed to mist slightly, and her vision blurred. The moon outside twinkled.

Dawn felt herself moving, led by instinct itself. Padding across her teenage haven to the door, she slowly turned the knob, still somewhat in a dream state.

The corridor seemed ghostly. She drifted down through the passageway, noting the shadows that glided along with her, falling on each step that she took. Down to the door at the end.

Dawn opened the door carefully, and her mind shook as she saw her mother sitting on the bed, looking alone and worn. Neither of them noticed a spark of green energy dance into her blue eyes.

"Mum?" her voice sounded thin and high-pitched to her own ears.

"Oh, pumpkin-belly," Joyce looked up at her. Coloured bags weighed down her eyes as she tried to smile.

The pure sorrow in her voice seemed to radiate a different wavelength to her. She felt the years of sadness, and the joys and laughter and tears. She felt the ache, and most of all, the inner spirit of indomitable love. The flame and fire that no-one and nothing could quench, of compassion and gentleness.

Dawn stepped softly over, until she too sat on the bed. And for once, she pulled her mother down into a hug. She wrapped her arms around her mother as Joyce wept.

Gradually, she began to make out words through the tears. A sadness that enveloped her, and that only the ageless conscious of her mind could understand.

"I love you both, my Dawn. My Dawnie…"

No words were needed. None but the faltering syllables spilling out of her mother's mouth.

"But I just get so tired…"

Exhaustion.

"I'm just like any mother, baby."

Extraordinary.

"I just want the best for you."

Empathy.

"Because you're my two girls, and I want you to live."

Endless.

"And it hurts when I see you two hurt. It does. It really does."

Love.

She stayed in that semi-conscious state until they both fell asleep, and then turquoise power radiated through her dreams, spiralling in patterns of teardrops.

8 8 8


	29. Vampire Tears

**Chapter 27: Vampire Tears**

**Disclaimer: No ownership. I've got most of the DVDs, though!**

**Rating: I think I'm boring everyone to death repeating the same thing each time. See the first fourteen chapters if you haven't, yet :)**

**A/N (Ah, thanks to Dieu Anonyme, Blu, and Kim! You all gave me the motivation to get this one out quickly! Thank-you for not denying me the pleasure of coming back to review-alerts, all of you:D. I'm glad you liked Spike's bantering, Dieu Anonyme, and I'm glad you're enjoying the story, Blu. : ). Brian and Mia are quite minor characters, but they will be making a few reappearances as the series go on, and I know the part with Dawn was a bit strange, but just think of it as one of the several reasons this is AU.**

**So thanks for reviewing again, people! Now onto our regularly scheduled chapter. Enjoy!)**

8 8 8

The air rushed past my face as I ran. Lights sparkled on and off in front of me, and the night air enveloped my body familiarly, almost like a blanket.

Why am I running?

It was a good question that I didn't want to answer. Such a good question that I ignored it.

The night was burning. Cool, but like fire as something bit inside me, gnawing away at my liver. The stars shone subduedly, caught by waves of clouds and pale next to the comforting moon, dripping of silver. A night of secrets unwound and nature unfolding.

Yeah, I can 'wax lyrical' as Giles would say when I'm upset. So sue me. It's probably because I'm channelling someone else who can speak like that. I jerked back to the present, watching the cemetery speed past. I would find no refuge there tonight. Or would I? I did a quick about-turn, and just as I entered the iron-wrought gates, I saw a shadow sneaking by. Instantly, my Slayer senses registered it as part of the non-heartbeat society

"Isn't this my lucky day?" I commented viciously. The vamp turned towards me. For a second, I thought she looked familiar, but I brushed it away. Just because she was blonde didn't mean anything.

"Oh cra…"

"Yeah," I smiled. I don't think it was a very nice one. "What are you up to this time?"

"Me? But you don't even…"

She hit me first, but I saw it coming a mile away. I let her. It pulled me straight back into my body, back into the body that let me pour out all my rage. Her claws raked across my cheek, but I relished the pain. I came in with a left uppercut that sent her reeling backwards, and then I spun around in a high-kick. Each blow vented my anger and my hurt.

I slowly descended into some place in the depths of my being that frightened me. It wasn't the same primeval feeling that had swamped me when I'd fought Adam. It was something lighter than that. Like a pale shadow of it. Somewhere along the way, another two vamps had joined in. I concentrated on them, as the female vamp lay dazed against a headstone. I only noticed the tears as I started to choke on them.

"Buffy!"

The words finally seeped through my rage. They were hoarse, almost scratchy, as if the owner had been running for a long time, and then shouting for a long time. I recognized it after a dim moment of searching, and the anger blazed anew.

"Go home, Riley," I growled. It sounded feral in my ears, and by the startled look on his face, I knew to him it probably sounded even worse.

"Buffy…"

"Go home!" I snarled, even as the vampire in front of me turned to dust. I almost screamed in frustration. Spike told me later that I looked like I was about to hit him. Well, of course, not in those words. More like that with lots of 'pricks' and 'bloody hells' and 'you should have' and such.

Instead, I ripped the stake out of his hands, and tossed it away. I kicked the other vamp in the head to give us a few seconds reprieve, and then turned back to him.

"Riley, get out of here now."

He shook his head. "No, let me explain…"

"There is no explaining! You don't need to explain anything! Just get out of my sight!"

"No, you…"

To this day, I wonder what would have happened if I'd hit him. I was so tempted to. The Powers knew I was tempted. I don't even know how I stopped myself. Instead, I ignored him completely and utterly. As the vamp rose, I began beating him to within an inch of his life. Riley tried to help, but as one of my blows almost broke a rib, he knew it was useless. But when he somehow managed to get in from behind, and the vampire crumbled, I just turned to the female as she groggily rose.

"Buffy…"

I didn't reply. He stood there helplessly, as this time, I left him no openings.

So he tried another tack.

"Buffy, I know you're listening to me. Honestly, I didn't know. I'm sorry. But I didn't sleep with her. I slept with you. Can't you understand that?"

_Spike knew. How come you didn't?_

He obviously couldn't read me. He kept going.

"You know I wouldn't do something like that on purpose."

Punch.

Crack.

Blood.

High kick.

Thud.

Blood.

"Come on, Buffy. We've been through some tough times together…"

_Were you there when I died? When I had to face Angelus? No, I didn't think so._

Punch.

Cry.

Tears.

Warm.

Liquid.

Blood.

"And I know you…"

_You don't know anything about me._

Punch.

He gave up, then and just stood there for about five minutes, watching helplessly as I reduced the vampire to stolen blood and crushed bone.

Then he turned away, sickened, and I felt him leave. Physically.

I felt salt stinging cuts on my hand, and startled, I looked at her. Actually did.

Two words hit me.

_Beautiful_.

_Crushed_.

Had I really ever looked? Into the faces?

She was beautiful, even through the ridges of her gameface. Or she had been, before I'd crushed her. Tears ran down her cheeks. I stared. Tears?

"What the…?"

Golden eyes glittered as her gameface contorted in pain. "Why are you doing this?"

"What do you mean?"

Suddenly, I felt the anger drain out of me. It was her eyes. Golden and unblinking.

She leapt at me, then, when I was caught off guard. Slammed my shoulder to the ground with a sickening thud, but regaining my senses, I levered my legs underneath her and sent her flying. She collapsed this time, and I knew she wouldn't get up again.

I got the strangest feeling as I finally dusted her. Her golden eyes followed me the whole way, as I raised the stake and plunged it down into her chest. And then I stood, watching the wind lift the ashes away.

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

I could tell that she felt my presence then. Perhaps she'd felt it all along, but she didn't even turn around. Just stood there, staring at sky and air as the breeze danced through the trees and took the remnants of a creature of the night with it.

"I never knew vampires cried," she whispered.

"Didn't Peaches ever cry in front of you?" I snorted. "Just like him, the old…"

I deliberately left my sentence hanging as she tensed. I prepared myself to dodge, but the fist never came. Instead, she raised her eyes to the stars.

"You know what? I never really actually got it when the science teacher said each of those stars supported an x number of planets, and then an x number of life. But then they die, don't they?"

"And we still see them, long after they die," I murmured, wondering. What flight of fancy had caught m… the Slayer's eye?

"Yeah," she shivered, and without thinking, I took off my precious leather duster and offered it to her.

She looked at me, shocked, and I suddenly realized how stupid I looked. "What are you doing?"

"Um… well… you're cold… so I… I…" growling in frustration, I slung the coat on again. "Forget it."

She stared at me oddly, and I felt the sudden urge to close my eyes and wait for the inevitable. But then, most astoundingly of all, she smiled. Tiredly.

"Thanks. I… what would Giles say? Appreciate the sentiment."

"No problem," I said gruffly.

We started walking. Or rather, she started walking, and I followed her. I got a strange sense of déjà vu. Which was strange, considering… I don't know. It was just strange. The two of us, walking out in the open. Not patrolling, not fighting, nothing. Just walking. Oddly, I felt like reaching out to her. The prick had driven his sword in right well, even if she wasn't showing it. Nothing but the blood on her hands showed that. And her eyes, and the way she walked, but…

"You should wash those," I said softly.

"Huh?" she stared at me, coming back from wherever she'd drifted off to.

"The cuts," I pointed at her bruised hands. "Just in case they get infected."

She gave me another 'look'. "Bollocks," I snarled. "I was just trying to help. If you don't…"

The night was becoming stranger and stranger. On one hand, I wanted to run the hell away from her to my crypt, and push all my thoughts away and get drunk. On the other hand, I wanted to stay, I wanted to…

Bloody hell. Didn't know what I wanted.

"Yeah," she said slowly, bringing me back to reality this time. "I probably should."

She kept on walking, but I stopped and stared.

What was that?

Had the Slayer just _agreed_ with me?

"W-w-what?"

She turned around and raised an eyebrow inquiringly as I gaped like a fool. "What?"

I shook my head, and caught up to her in three quick strides. "I'm sorry, Slayer, but did you just _agree_ with me?"

She stopped this time in midstride, and her eyes went wide. "My God, I did, didn't I?"

I looked around theatrically. "Hello?" I called. "Where's the apocalypse?"

Unbelievably, she laughed, and whacked me on the shoulder. "Cut it out. I'm sure I've agreed with you before."

I snorted. "Like hell. Anyway, how 'bout I patrol for the rest o' the night? You're lookin' a little knackered. Go home and wash the blood off. Get little bit to help you, or Mum."

Just like the Slayer, she only focused on the last bit. "Since when did you start calling my mother 'Mum'?"

"Since whenever I decided to," I retorted. "I don't know, don't keep a bloody calendar kicking around. Besides, she that I could."

Again, that studying, speculative look. "How'd you two get so close?"

I coughed into my sleeve. "Just talks," I said weakly. "Anyway, as I said, I can patrol for the rest o' the night. You go get some rest and look after those hands."

As if my words had actually made her realize how tired she was, she suddenly sagged like a… like a… like a sagging, beautiful Slayer, I guess. "Would you… really?"

In the face of her hopefulness and little girl smile, I felt my undead heart seep into my ribs and trickle down into my insides. I swallowed. "Yeah, sure, love."

I watched her stride away, but at the cemetery gates, she suddenly turned around.

"Hey, Spike!"

"What?"

"Thanks!"

She was gone before I could clear the blissful stars from my eyes. I was ecstatic. For no reason.

Very manly, of course, in my glee. Really I was. No dancing around in the graveyard, this time. Kept it to m'crypt, after the patrol.

8 8 8

Daniel's breath misted in front of him as they hurried along the pavement. Occasional cars slid past, and scattered unevenly ahead of them were shops still open, casting their fluorescent light across the street. But still, Cassandra held his hand in a death-grip.

"This isn't good. This isn't good."

"Relax," he tried to comfort her, even though his own heart was beating painfully fast. "What could possibly happen?"

She tightened her hold, and he winced. "Do I even have to answer that?"

He thought about it. "No, I don't think you do."

The street slowly blurred into darkness broken only by lamps positioned erratically along their path. Cass quickened her pace, and Daniel along with her, not daring to talk anymore. A hidden instinct seemed to sweep over the both of them. They weren't quite running yet, but they were close.

Out of the blue, Daniel stopped. Just like that. And Cass almost got her arm wrenched out.

"What?" she hissed.

He didn't reply. He merely pressed a finger to her lips. That was when she heard it.

A whispered chanting drifted past her ears, carried on the light wind that ghosted through the trees. From ahead, a soft, slightly incandescent blue glow caught their eyes.

Daniel took a step towards it.

"Daniel!"

He placed his finger to her lips again, and continued. Helpless to resist, Cassandra crept along with him silently as they neared their destination, and the chanting grew louder.

8 8 8


	30. Council of Reformations

**Chapter 28: Council of Reformations**

**Disclaimer: No ownership. I'm just perpetually on my knees before the altar of Jossverse. :P.**

**Rating: I think I'm boring everyone to death repeating the same thing each time. See the first fourteen chapters if you haven't, yet :)**

**Summary: This is the summary of everything that's happened so far (or at least everything I've thought of at the moment), and I apologize because it's rather bulky. Rest assured in the future I will only do the last couple of chapters.**

**AU from the ending of Season 4. Spike got wise and joined Buffy against Adam, and thus participated in the enjoining spell that has been tweaked slightly. Two mortal humans from our dimension, Cassandra and Daniel, under suspicious circumstances that look like the Powers that Be are playing around again have been transported to Buffy's dimension, Cassandra with limited knowledge of what is to come. Dawn has arrived, forming a tight friendship with Cassandra, Daniel, and Spike, who has fought with Buffy against Dracula, Harmony, and others. There are also hints of a mystical residue left over from the enjoinment spell powerful enough for Spike to connect with Buffy individually as well as all together. The timeline has been skewed because of Cassandra and Daniel's appearance, which means that Faith awakes a year later than she should have with less confusion. Although the bodyswap takes place, she chooses to go to Angel willingly, parting on fairly good terms with Buffy. Spike helped save Buffy when he realized it wasn't Buffy coming on to him, but Riley didn't, and slept with her. Big verbal fight between Riley, Buffy, and Spike, ending with Buffy storming out, Riley attempting (and then giving up) following her, and Spike who has become rather confused as of late as to his feelings about her following her and looking after her. Not is all emotional angst, however, as there are glimpses of a new Big Bad arising…**

**A/N (A million, million thanks to Dieu Anonyme, kim, skeleton-in-the-closet, and Firestar! All of your reviews were so lovely… Thank-you for not denying me the pleasure of coming back to review-alerts, all of you:D. Heh, I know I've been portraying Spike as rather fluffy as of late (laughs evilly) but yes, he is being cute. :P. Dieu Anonyme, don't worry. Practice makes perfect with the menacing threats. :P. I'm really glad you're enjoying this, skeleton-in-the-closet… blush not sure if I really am worthy of the praise, though. And yeah… I enjoyed writing that scene, Firestar. I'll try to incorporate your idea of the summary… come to think of it, that's an awfully good idea. Done!**

**Thanks for all of the wonderful reviews, people. . They make a poor writer happy. :D**

**Now onto our regularly scheduled chapter. (Phew, took some time, didn't it: ) ) Enjoy!)**

8 8 8

"Guys!" Dawn rushed to them, tangible relief in her eyes. "I was worried. I mean, alone. In the dark. With just. Two of you… You know? Um… yeah. All with the worriedness… I'm glad you're okay!"

She searched their faces, but when Cassandra only gave a pathetic, hiccuping laugh, she knew that the building worry since consciousness had been justified.

"What happened?"

The bell rung.

Daniel gave a strained smile. "Dammit, why can't it be like in Harry Potter where they get to discuss all their secret plans out in the open, when important teachers are walking past, and always manage to finish it before class…"

"Miss. Summers?" His eyes slid around to all three of them. "Ah, and Miss. Evans and Mr. Smith. What could I expect?"

They stayed silent as the (current) principal overshadowed them sternly. "Now, you wouldn't be wanting to override your already less-than-stellar reputations, would you?"

Daniel stared, deliberately vacant-looking. "In English, please."

"Two hours after school, Smith," Mr. Gordon replied smoothly. "Now go to class."

Daniel bit his tongue on the retort as Cassandra elbowed him, and they kept moving to the plain blue lockers. As soon as Mr. Gordon moved out of sight, Daniel turned around.

"Hey, what was that for?"

"To stop you from getting yourself into further trouble," Cass's face was serious. "We need to talk about…"

The second bell rung, and Mr. Gordon popper his head suspiciously around the corner. Quickly, they retrieved their books and moved off to History.

8 8 8

It was the sunlight spilling onto my pillow that woke me. I yawned and stretched as the breeze came in. Sunnydale. At least I could always count on the sun. And the good weather. And the cloudless skies. And the vampires. And the apocalypses. And the Hellmouth.

And as yesterday had reminded me, days of Cupid deliberately being a bastard and playing shoot-the-Buffy-with-painful-arrows-of-the-non-lovey-kind.

I mean, honestly. How could he? Not tell who I was, that was…

My head spun. I just couldn't think of that at the moment. I slid under the covers slightly. No lessons until eleven today, anyway. I could indulge myself in a bit of a sleep in, couldn't I?

So I tried to remember the meditation technique that Giles had been going over with me lately. Lying back, I let images flow into my mind without restraint. He'd babbled something about Freud and free association as he'd taught me, but seeing as I hadn't really listened then, I ignored that part.

_The female vampire…_

I resisted the urge to push that thought away, and instead cautiously followed it.

_Me… Blood… Life…_

It was hard letting this go on… I mean come on. Even I know I'm the Queen of Denial. I can't deny **that** away.

_Beauty… shattered… hurt… wounds… let… acceptance… conclusions…hurt… confidence… hurt… not knowing… _

_Hurt…_

_Spike…_

My eyes snapped open and I bolted upright. "What the…!" I exclaimed out loud. "Where did _that_ come from?"

Too unsettled to do any more meditation, I pushed back the covers and got unsteadily out of bed. I looked at myself in the mirror as I passed it.

Yep, still the same old Buffy. With a few old tear stains and a head full of…

No. The old Buffy… the new Buffy… the _me_ Buffy most certainly did _not_ have a head full of a non-arch-nemesis Spike.

I looked at the mirror again and groaned. This was a losing battle. I grasped the comb and pulled it through my hair, mentally not thinking about him and thinking instead about the lectures today. Suddenly, thinking about what had happened with Riley seemed a whole lot easier than dealing with the confusing issue of a coat-offering, bleached-blonde vampire.

Before I could explore last night further, though, the phone rang.

I groaned until I recognized the number. Willow. A smile flitted through my heart. Old times and memories… Willow ringing me up every night and then coming over for hours of girl talks over Angel and Xander and Oz… I frowned as I realized that since Tara had come into our lives, we hadn't really had the chance to talk so much. The enjoinment spell had brought us closer again, but not as close as I'd have liked it to. I picked up the phone.

"Hey Willow."

"Hi Buffy," her bubbly voice floated across the line, slightly subdued. "How are you hanging?"

I grimaced and flopped down onto my bed. "Yeah, I guess I'm not too bad. I went out and had a little Buffy-slaying time, so that was fun."

"I hope you didn't get to sleep too late… you know the lecture today's important, right?" Willow laughed. "And I doubt she'll be happy if you sleep again in her class."

I chuckled dryly. "Well, actually, I got to sleep fairly early, considering. And that's one of my problems."

"One of your problems?" she echoed, and I could feel her confusion through the phone. I smiled as I got the perfect image of her face. "How does that work? You get good sleepies after horrible night… isn't that a good thing?"

"Yeah, it is," I sighed. "But you see, the reason I got to sleep early was because Spike showed up and offered to patrol for me so I could rest."

Silence. I could hear the phone crackling slightly as Willow moved around.

"You serious?"

"Yeah, I am. So do you see my problem?"

"Wow, that was really nice of him," she ignored my last question. "You know, he's been more helpful lately…"

"Yes! That's it!" I punched air. "That's my problem! Spike is being too helpful!"

Silence.

"You _do_ know how ridiculous that sounded, don't you?" Willow asked.

"But it is, Will," I flopped backwards. "I know… I know we've had this talk before…" I winced slightly at the memory. "And it didn't really end with flowers and roses. But why's he helping?"

"Well, we can always do the enjoining spell again," Willow offered. "I've been wanting to try that again. "We'll be able to see."

"I guess…" I sighed. "But when did it get so complicated, Will? I mean, I got a little cold, and he offered me his duster! Hello, Spike here! He offered his precious leather duster without even thinking! I could tell. It was just weird."

"Okay," she said. "That _is_ weird."

"I know… and I can't believe it. I mean, even the situation between me and Riley sounds simple compared to that," I sat up and started pacing around the room.

"About that…" Willow mentioned tentatively. "What are you going to do about Riley?"

I stopped, and then sat down again. And swallowed.

"I don't know."

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

"When Queen Elizabeth realized that she only had a limited amount of choices available…"

_Something's happening. _Daniel wrote. He passed the note to Dawn, who opened it carefully without Mrs. Cuddon noticing.

_What do you mean?_

_What Cass and I saw last night…_

_What did you see?_

Daniel and Cassandra shared a look, and then Dawn silently slid the paper to her.

_There was nothing, last night._

_What?_

_As in there was nothing. No random demons. No bats. We didn't even see a stray vampire. There was nothing but…_

Cass paused, and surreptitiously passed it to Daniel.

_This… thing. We saw._

_A ritual._

_Of what?_

_That's what we need to find out._

_Especially when…_

They swallowed.

Mrs. Cuddon lifted the crumpled piece of paper and scanned it. When she was done, she raised and eyebrow, and hung it contemptuously in her hand.

"And what, may I ask, is the meaning of this?"

"Um…"

Cass thought quickly. "We're writing a fantasy book together," the words came out in a rush. "We were deciding on this part where…"

"That's quite enough, Cassandra," she stopped her, and then looked warningly at the three of them. They gulped. "If I catch you writing silly notes in my class again, I will give you a detention. Is that clear?"

"Yes Mrs. Cuddon," they chorused.

"Good."

_Phew._

8 8 8

"In any event," Quentin Travers continued. "There has been a disturbance. And with our Slayer gone rogue… well, I'm open to suggestions."

A young woman cleared her throat. "Shouldn't we alert the former Watcher? Giles? The Slayer may have broken away from our Council, but from what we've heard she's still fighting evil."

Another man spoke up. "I don't like that idea. It's like we're crawling back to her… she should be crawling back to us! She's the Slayer, we're the Council! She is _our_ weapon to use!"

"Your arrogance is unbecoming," Elspeth replied coolly. "If you must remember, the Council…"

"I'm sure we don't need another history lesson," Fredrick snapped, his eyes flashing in barely concealed hatred.

"A pity, considering…"

"I don't know," another man mused. "She has been doing a good job…"

"She's a traitor!"

"Now, calm down, Fredrick…"

"Don't you remember? Taking up with Angelus and…"

"I thought you said we didn't need another history lesson," Elspeth said dryly.

"Why you…"

"Enough!" Travers barked out, silencing the entire table. His burning eyes swept over all of them. "I asked for your opinions, not for an all out brawl! Elspeth! Fredrick! Desist!"

The table of Watchers stirred. Since Quentin Travers had become Head Watcher, a different way of thinking had slowly overcome the Council. Less arrogant, more accepting. Many muttered that it was his daughter's influences… suitably out of his nephew's hearing. Some of the older members resisted strongly, others were happier. But they were all still slightly confused as to how to assess Slayer situations now, with neither the old view nor a full new view to rely on. Hence, they looked expectantly at Quentin Travers, their Head Watcher, and waited for him to continue speaking.

"In any event, what we do face is serious. The prophecies have foretold a year of trouble ahead. And near the Hellmouth, the energies have been increasing. It is about time."

"So what do we do?" Fedrick demanded. "Follow _her_ fool proposal?"

"Actually," Quentin replied mildly. "I see nothing foolish in it. If anything, we might be able to gain her trust again."

"But what if the ex-Watcher doesn't listen?"

"I'm sure he will," Quentin shrugged. "It's part of his job."

8 8 8


	31. Tensions

**Chapter 29: Tensions**

**Disclaimer: No ownership. I'm just perpetually on my knees before the altar of Jossverse. :P.**

**Rating: I think I'm boring everyone to death repeating the same thing each time. See the first fourteen chapters if you haven't, yet :)**

**Summary: This is the summary of the last couple of chapters and anything important I thought needed to be added. :D.**

**AU from the ending of Season 4. The timeline has been skewed because of Cassandra and Daniel's appearance, which means that Faith awakes a year later than she should have with less confusion. Although the bodyswap takes place, she chooses to go to Angel willingly, parting on fairly good terms with Buffy. Spike helped save Buffy when he realized it wasn't Buffy coming on to him, but Riley didn't, and slept with her. Big verbal fight between Riley, Buffy, and Spike, ending with Buffy storming out, Riley attempting (and then giving up) following her, and Spike who has become rather confused as of late as to his feelings about her following her and looking after her. Not is all emotional angst, however, as there are glimpses of a new Big Bad arising. Such a Big Bad that the Council has gotten rather worried and is thinking of making contact with Buffy again. Two new characters of Frederick, Travers' nephew, and Elspeth, Travers' daughter, added. Elspeth thinks of Buffy as a person, Frederick as an old-fashioned Council person would. Buffy has also revealed some interesting thoughts about Spike as she struggles to deal with her confusion, resulting in an intriguing conversation with Willow. Cassandra, Dawn, and Daniel have also started vaguely discussing what they'd seen the previous night.**

**A/N (Thank-you very much to kim and charity for your reviews. Yes, Quentin has never been nice. Perhaps there's a reason I might have already hinted at:P. (man, I'm horrible at hints). And yes, I tend to think Buffy gets very hesitant about these situations because she doesn't really know how to deal with them. I'm also glad you like this fic, Charity. blushes. I'll try to get these out faster, I've just been very busy for the past week, but everything is settled now. And yes, I've got a few story ideas up my sleeve, but these won't happen until I finish this one. Thanks for all of the wonderful reviews, people. . They make a poor writer happy. :D**

**Now onto our regularly scheduled chapter. (Phew, took some time, didn't it: ) ) Enjoy!)**

8 8 8

"He, she, it!" Dawn threw up her hands in frustration, and I knew how she felt. "Just… whatever. That's not the point. The point is that… it spoke of it before, remember?"

"Next time we're forced to take a little detour into yah-yah land," I said dryly, "We'll need to figure out a name."

Cass sat cross-legged, leaning against her bed as she fidgeted anxiously, her eyes following me as I paced. in her room, while Dawn bounced up and down on the balls of her feet, tense with unburned energy. I looked around at the walls, almost smiling through my confusion. Giles had reluctantly allowed her to 'brighten' up his former storage room a bit, when I'd nabbed the guest one, so in a typical Cassie fashion, she'd gone all out. The walls were a dreamy, light turquoise wave, with glistening glitter she had painstakingly mixed in. Despite the calming effect this had, however, we were all agitated. The midnight ritual had scared Cass, scared Dawn when we recounted it. And yeah.

It'd scared me.

I know, I know. It wasn't a macho thing, really. It wasn't. Serious. It's just… this time I couldn't even use the excuse that that was the first supernatural thing I'd seen in Sunnydale. I'd seen Kraggy, Spike in gameface, and a few other things since. But nothing could compare to this. _Nothing_.

On… from where… where we used to be, I remember watching the news. The wars… hell, they're still here now. On this one. I guess… this is so similar to the Earth I know I wonder sometimes if we ever left. The only thing that seems different is the supernatural stuff. Which makes the place very different, but the same stupid humans are still invading places for no apparent reason other than money, and bombs were still blowing up, and landmines were still wrecking the lives of innocents, and all the media ate it up. Well, I used to, in some ways I still do, think that those were the worst images I've seen in my life. But last night…

A waking nightmare.

Even those images on the news… bloody and mangled, you could always block out. After a while, you either became desensitised or just buried your head in the sand by turning the thing off, and losing yourself in the darkness of your living room, where no-one could see you shake. At least I did. Not that there was really anyone around to see me at those times, but you know.

But this. That… ritual. I couldn't. I couldn't begin to explain it. It's worse than the shivers down your spine during a horror movie, it was like all the blood in my veins had screamed out in protest. I know I'm not a good guy. Not one of those fancy heroes who'll sacrifice everything to reach their goals, not one of those compassionate ones who always find a way to make everything better. Heck, even though I try to be sometimes, I'm not one of those brave, dependable stereotypes either. It's harder than it looks. Especially when your heart has fallen out of your chest and is lying on the grass before you, beating out the shock and utter revulsion and _fear_ that is enveloping you.

Am I making any sense? I don't know. I'd be surprised if I was. I'd be surprised if you even understood a little bit of what I was feeling. Okay, I admit it. I'm sheltered. Very sheltered. Brian used to joke and say I'd been living under a rock before I met him, and even then my view only widened fractionally. Of course, then there was that whole fiasco and Brian abandoned the gentle teasing and go full on…

I'm babbling.

God, I'm being like Cass, and babbling.

And I used to pride myself on being the stable one.

Cass broke through my thoughts at that instant, and my feet which had been unconsciously pacing all the while tripped on the edge of the carpet and sent me sprawling into Cass' lap. She squeaked to a stop.

"So should we… aah! Daniel!"

"Sorry!" I scrambled up, blushing. "Just… tripped. You were saying?"

In truth, I was kinda grateful for the reprieve. I often accuse Cass of thinking too much. Hypocrite. Me, that is. A hypocrite. Not her. Me. I'm a hypocrite… why am I bothering with this line of thought?

Cass straightened again, and blushed slightly. "Um… I was just saying, should we tell someone? Giles? Buffy? Spike? Willow or Tara? Xander or Anya?"

"I guess… Spike first," I said dubiously. "He's going to be the one who'll trust us the most. Then maybe Giles and Buffy."

"We could tell Willow and Tara as well, right?" Cass mused. "They'd understand… they might even be feeling the Hellmouth's disturbances. Buffy definitely would be. Slayer senses and…"

"We don't tell anyone," Dawn stated flatly.

It was the finality in her voice that got me, and Cass as well, by the looks of it. Just pure and utter determination. If I'd learnt one thing about Dawn when I'd got here, it was that she was determined. To the point of insanity sometimes, but hey, I admired that, in a way.

"But why?" Cass queried, surprised.

Dawn stopped staring out the window and stepped purposefully before us. Sometimes, I wondered if she ever really acknowledged she was the 'leader' of our little group, or if she just took control when she had to.

"Because we need to look at this further," her face lit up. "Come on, guys. This is the first chance we've had to investigate things ourselves… at the very least, we should try to find some leads before we hand it over to them."

I sighed. "And if we get ourselves killed? We're kind of out of our league here, Dawn. This is Buffy's realm."

I really should have noticed Cass gesturing frantically in an effort to make me shut up. Well, noticed before I finished the sentence. Dawn's eyes narrowed into slits.

"I've known almost as long as she has. This is my realm too…"

You'd think I'd have realized, I'm supposed to be the observant one. And a fifteen year old teenager almost frothing at the mouth barely two meters from where I was standing who was one of my best friends… kinda hard to miss. And yet _still_… Oh, I knew why she was angry. At least, partially. I won't be so arrogant as to say I understood her after only half a year or so. But my mouth…

And my fear…

"Yeah, you've known of it," I cut her off. "But it's different to that. Come on, you're not an idiot." I gestured around us. "We can't fight demons and stop apocalypses. We're not equipped to do this, Dawn. We're three fifteen-year-old kids."

"What the hell is age, anyway?" she demanded angrily. "Why does it have to command everything we do? Okay, fine. Maybe we can't fight demons. I didn't say we were going to. But can't we just investigate this ourselves before handing it over?"

"Cass," I swung to her. "Come on, this is ridiculous. Don't tell me you think we can do this." Somewhere, my eyes pleaded with her.

She shook her head slowly, and I felt relief flood through me so strongly I leaned against the table, but then it vanished, replaced by dread.

"I saw what you saw last night as well, Dan. And yeah, we can't fight against that. But all Dawn's suggesting is that we research a little. It can't harm us. And then, when we do tell them, they won't brush it off because we'll have the facts."

Dawn looked smugly at me. Cassie's eyes stared trustingly into mine.

"Just research?" I tried to save myself. "I thought you wanted to go investigate the Hellmouth."

Dawn snorted, and looked at her watch. "Anyway, I need to go. Mum said that I had to be home by five tonight… don't know why."

"See you."

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

"Flowers?" Willow asked, a raised eyebrow.

I watched as Buffy stirred the coffee in her cup, seeming mesmerized in the small whirlpool it created. My heart reached out to her. After the lecture, all three of us had agreed on a slow wind-down before returning to real life. I knew Willow wanted to do the best-friend supporting deal… and… and I wanted to be there for Buffy too. I empathized with the deep radiating hurt Buffy was attempting to hide. I could feel it coming off her in waves as we sat there, sipping the hot and bittersweet milk that was our way of connecting silently. A liquid bond that tried to soothe our nerves. I felt slightly left out, as always. That was to be expected though. We all know people in different ways. I knew aspects of Willow Buffy would never see… I blushed at the thought. _And better never see, _I smirked inwardly. But then, Buffy and Willow had been best friends since her first arrival in Sunnydale, and that was quite a long time to be best friends.

Buffy exhaled. "Yeah. Flowers. It kind of figures, doesn't it?" she added, somewhat bitterly. Not acidly. The anger was directed both ways, and so was the guilt, in her mind. "I think I scared him last night, and he's too scared to meet me face to face at the moment."

"What h-happened?" I asked, trepidation in my voice. What could have been so bad to make an ex-soldier afraid?

Buffy shrugged, but a monument of sorrowing pain seemed to weigh her down. "I kinda beat up some vampires before staking them, but it's what I usually do anyway…"

Unease steeped her for a moment. "And after he left, Spike came along."

My ears would have pricked if I'd been Miss. Kitty Fantastic. "Spike? He followed you, then?"

"He was acting all kinda weird…" she looked far away, fingering the sleeve of her denim jacket before taking another sip. "Seemed like he was worried, but not so much with the brutal vamp-slaying as with me. He offered me his precious _coat_…" she trickled off, and laughed this time. "But you've already heard it in the big exposition, haven't you, Will?"

Willow chuckled. "I think it's kinda cute."

"Will!" Buffy looked shocked. "We're talking about Spike, here!"

"Okay, cute in an I'm-the-Slayer-of-Slayers-and-I'm-coming-after-you-as-well-with-my-80s-look-and-bleached-blonde-hair kinda way."

"Evil," Buffy shuddered and gulped some of her coffee. "You forgot evil."

"I-I… I think that's almost questionable these days," I offered. "He's helping so much with everything."

"We've been through this so many times," Buffy sighed. "And we've said 'we need to enjoin' again so many times as well."

"Well, we do," Willow perked up. "I…" she hesitated and glanced at me. "Sorry, baby."

"It's okay," I half-smiled. "I can understand, kind of. M-m-magickal bonds are very important. A-and it looks like it could be very useful as well."

"It's not just that," Willow's eyes took on the faraway look that I identified with her. I loved that look… loved every part of her. "It's almost as if it's meant to be like that… oh, I'm not explaining that very well, am I?"

"Don't worry, Will," Buffy laughed. "I couldn't have said it much better. And it's strange… Spike's been able to initiate it a few times with just us. Maybe I should try…"

She was cut off by her mobile bleeping. "Hang on a second," Buffy frowned. "Sorry guys."

She flicked it open gracefully and moved it up to nestle next to her ear. "Hello? Buffy Summers here… Oh, hey Giles."

Willow shot a curious glance at me, and leaned in closer in an effort to listen in.

Buffy laughed uneasily. "Giles, you say that when… _WHAT!_ The…?"

Instantly, her face grew grave and intent as Giles reeled off a stream of information that was just inaudible. Willow and I shared a worried glance as she turned away slightly, and slipped effortlessly into Slayer mode. It was strange to watch. An instant, unconscious relaxation of some muscles, the contraction of others, and her body shifted almost imperceptibly into one ready for an apocalypse. I still marvelled at it.

"Got it. See you in ten."

She snapped it shut and looked at us grimly. "Sorry guys, we have to meet Giles at his apartment _now_. Call Anya and Xander. Something's come up."

8 8 8

When Dawn had left, I moved over to him. He was like a stone sculpture now. I knew he didn't even realize his brow was furrowed and he looked as if he wanted to bolt.

"Hey, Dan."

He startled out of his reverie, and the lines smoothed away slightly. "Sorry… what?"

I couldn't laugh, not when he had that look on his face. "I'm afraid as well, you know."

He shook slightly. "I'm not afraid."

I shrugged, and wrapped my arms around myself. Suddenly, it seemed a lot colder in the room. The tension from the almost-fight still crackled almost visibly. "Well I am. We've got every right to be afraid, you know. It's scary, what we saw."

He swallowed. "You always could see through me, huh?"

I laughed softly. "Hardly. You're one who could always read people. What's up?"

He looked back at me, strangely now. Swallowed again, dry mouth rasping.

"You know. It was just that feeling. That smell. I shouldn't be scared, I know I shouldn't. Not by just the smell. But that knife, whoever was holding it. God, Cass. It was so _evil_. Couldn't you feel it?"

"Yeah," I said as stoically as I could without shuddering at the memory. "Yeah, I could."

8 8 8


	32. Hiding

**Chapter 30: Hiding**

**Disclaimer: No ownership. I'm just perpetually on my knees before the altar of Jossverse. :P.**

**Rating: I think I'm boring everyone to death repeating the same thing each time. See the first fourteen chapters if you haven't, yet :)**

**Summary: This is the summary of the last couple of chapters and anything important I thought needed to be added. :D.**

**AU from the ending of Season 4. The timeline has been skewed because of Cassandra and Daniel's appearance, which means that Faith awakes a year later than she should have with less confusion. Although the bodyswap takes place, she chooses to go to Angel willingly, parting on fairly good terms with Buffy. Spike helped save Buffy when he realized it wasn't Buffy coming on to him, but Riley didn't, and slept with her. Big verbal fight between Riley, Buffy, and Spike, ending with Buffy storming out, Riley attempting (and then giving up) following her, and Spike who has become rather confused as of late as to his feelings about her following her and looking after her. Not is all emotional angst, however, as there are glimpses of a new Big Bad arising. Such a Big Bad that the Council has gotten rather worried and is thinking of making contact with Buffy again. Two new characters of Frederick, Travers' nephew, and Elspeth, Travers' daughter, added. Elspeth thinks of Buffy as a person, Frederick as an old-fashioned Council person would. Buffy has also revealed some interesting thoughts about Spike as she struggles to deal with her confusion, resulting in an intriguing conversation with Willow. Cassandra, Dawn, and Daniel have also started vaguely discussing what they'd seen the previous night. Now Buffy has just been contacted by Giles, and the gang is meeting up at Giles' house.**

**A/N (Thank-you very much to kim and charity for your reviews, again. I'm sorry for the lateness . . Rest assured now that the plan is finally coalescing properly for this fic so it should be a lot faster (I've spent most of the last month writing the plan and not the fic . ), and it should be over in around ten or so chapters, although I am thinking of writing a sequel if you people like this enough. :D. Thanks for all of the wonderful reviews, people. . They make a poor writer happy. :D**

**Now onto our regularly scheduled chapter! I hope you enjoy. )**

8 8 8

"That reminds me," Buffy looked at them all in the eye. "I think we've been wanting to do this for a long time."

"Do what?" Anya asked uncomprehendingly.

Tara, however, took a quick glance at all of their faces. "Oh," she realized.

Willow winced. "Sorry, Tara."

"No, no, it's okay," she smiled gently. "I understand."

"I don't," Anya muttered, irate. Then comprehension dawned. "Oh, it's that thing, is it?" she sighed.

"Maybe we s-should go and do some research about this? B-bring some b-books upstairs."

"That's a very good idea, Tara," Giles nodded.

"Why do we have to do the research?" Anya grumbled, even as she followed Tara, collecting a few books under her arm as they made their way up the stairs.

8 8 8

_It wasn't a river, this time. It was a tsunami. It never threatened to overwhelm us._

_It just did._

_People say that you have one personality, or one character. Any time you don't do something that fits into the mould they've created for you, you're temporarily, or even sometimes permanently, blanked out, because they can't cope. Some even go so far as to say there are only sixteen, or some other random personality combination, in the world._

_On the surface, maybe._

_But not inside._

_We always change. So many twists and turns in this meandering path that doesn't ever say where it's going. It doesn't even know. After all, do you?_

_If it was raw power the first time, what could we say of the second?_

_Pure and utter energy. Tumbled, tumultuous waterfalls of information and feelings. Yet one… one…_

_One of us was trying to hide._

_Such a perfect fit…_

_A waste of barriers. We dug down, deep together, and the one came along with us, not even resisting. We tore them down, even when we reached those walls that the one had hid from himself/herself. _

_No, wait._

_Not one._

_All._

_New tricks we had learned… but together, we felt hurt by this new trust. We were a new entity. What one tried to hide, we all wanted to discover… even the one who had hidden it. Perhaps we didn't have full control of this yet. Most of the walls, we tore down. Maybe?_

_Didn't we?_

_Some stood, insurmountable. Again and again, we assailed them… until we gave in to the lulling cradle of promise that allowed us to just luxuriate in our presences, in this feeling of absolute wholeness. Because in that instant we knew that we'd been gifted something all humans search for, but only, if they are lucky, briefly touch. _

_When we are down, we always look inside. Seeking answers that we already know just can't be there, because if they were, we wouldn't have a reason to feel sad. Isn't that true? Denying that we are brilliant in our own right. That we are perfect in being ourselves. That none can ever replicate us, or grace the Earth again with our exact presence, our exact experiences, our exact vitality or passion for life. Or the love that we are all capable of giving. The reservoirs of deep emotion that have no price, not even in this world of materialism…_

_We laughed at ourselves for our thoughts, and then delved deeper into our pasts…_

_But one…_

_Did one resist?_

_That wasn't right. The… fear? Shame? Was so strong it enveloped all of us. Broke past the sense of connectedness that was infinity beyond belief. To be that hurt made our hearts ache. Piece by piece, however, we fell under the lulling humming of our souls._

8 8 8

Xander Harris was playing on the football field. He saw the ball flying through the air at the far end of the oval, a far cry from home. Yet still, he threw caution to the winds and sprinted to where it was beginning to arc down gracefully. If he could just reach it…

Air rushed past him, making him feel almost as if he was flying. People watched in awe as he leapt through the air in perfect flight, almost as if he were stepping on non-existent ground to ascend ever higher, impossibly higher, into the sky to…

He triumphantly marked the ball, and then began his elegant descent, landing like a cat, and with the smile of a Cheshire, at that.

The grandstands erupted in cheering…

The daydream ended. He watched as the fantasies crumbled, and he was left with reality's cruelty. George sneered and pummelled him to the ground with a back-cracking tackle before he even started running, and he felt his soul bleed just that little bit more again.

8 8 8

Buried in books, she skipped out of the library haphazardly in near exuberant joy. She'd been looking for Queen of Sorcery for _ages_! And it'd just fallen into her hands just like that…

Crash!

The feeling vanished as she felt a solid force throw her backwards, scattering her precious books everywhere. Stumbling, she looked upwards tremulously.

"Oh, sorry Willow! Didn't see you there!" An incredibly fake voice laughed cheerfully. She instinctively shied back and put her head down.

"It's okay," she said softly.

More laughter. Laughter that died away amidst the mocking whispers that resounded in her head long after they'd left. Listlessly, she sat there, staring at the blood from the scraped knee she'd received. Her joy lay around her in shreds.

"Willow!"

Xander's familiar voice. She looked upwards as she saw him, and he knelt next to her, beginning to pick up the mess. "Willow, what happened?"

"Oh… nothing… it's just… H-harmony and her group just crashed into me again, that's all."

"Are you alright?" he asked with a worried grin on his face as he stared into her eyes.

"Yeah, I'm fine I guess," she sighed.

A sparkle of laughter suddenly leapt into his eyes. "Wait… how could they miss the books? No-one ever misses the books. I'm telling you, Willow, she's going to walk into a bus one day, and the whole world's IQ will go up. So don't worry."

"Xander!" she let herself laugh, and a small, tremulous smile crossed her face, growing brighter and brighter until it lit up into a flash of sunlight she would one day find, to lead her out of the shadows.

8 8 8

She nodded, quietly.

"I don't."

"Oh, that's good…" he started, but she cut him off. Taking a breath, she looked at him straight in the eye, unflinching, with all the anger and bottled-up pain of a mother in agony.

"I blame you."

He took a physical step back as he felt the force of the words assault him like training punches his Slayer threw… had thrown at him. But she wasn't finished. And that was the main reason he was shrinking now, inwardly.

"You've been this huge influence on her, guiding her," she persisted, making eye-contact when he looked away. "You had this whole relationship with her behind my back. I feel like you've taken her away from me."

Speechless, Giles looked back at her, and felt, actually felt, the pain rolling off her, the anger rolling off her, in waves. He paused as his shocked mind processed what had been said, and what had been behind and under and through what had been said, and tried to think of a response.

He swallowed imperceptibly. "I didn't make Buffy who she is."

"And who exactly is she?" Joyce demanded.

Giles just looked at her. What else could he say? And really, who knew the answer?

And that hurt. Inside. He'd failed. He knew it. And so did she.

8 8 8

"Take them all," he grinned, fangs bared. "Save the Slayer for me."

They ran and jumped down the stairs to the people below and began feeding, while Spike viciously grabbed Chantarelle by the neck and sank into her as she began sobbing and writhing. Buffy felt herself wake up, and immediately was aware of the crowbar end whistling towards her. Instinctively, she grasped his arm in mid-swing and threw him around to end in a stone pillar. The shocked expression on his face slackened as he sunk to the floor, unconscious.

Desperately, she scanned the mayhem exploding around her as vampires either snarled viciously and fed roughly, tearing skin and muscle, or were playing cruelly with their victims. Assessing the situation with a Slayer's eye, she saw Drusilla looking on from the balcony, frail and beautiful. A mocking parody of her former innocence. Then she looked at Spike as the plan unfurled in her mind.

Decision made, she took a running leap off a couch up to the balcony railing, nimbly flying over and landing like a cat. Without a moments pause, she reached out and ensnared Drusilla from behind, a stake in her hand.

Her voice echoed hoarsely through the room.

"Spike!"

Immediately, the blonde haired vampire stopped feeding and his eyes shot to her. Drusilla stared at the stake poised in front of her incredulously.

Buffy trembled. Slightly. She didn't even know why. She'd know later, of course.

His piercing blue eyes filled with anguish at the possibility of what might happen next. With a roar, he shouted loud enough to startle the entire neighbourhood.

"Everybody STOP!"

They all stopped.

Buffy felt her heartbeat slow slightly. "Good idea," she said. "Now you let everyone out, or your girlfriend fits in an ashtray."

She felt Drusilla whimper in her grasp, but that didn't stop her iron-hard resolve. Obviously frightened, the vampiress stared fearfully at her lover. "Spike?"

He cast a gentle look her way, even though his eyes raged with fire. "It's gonna be alright, baby," he soothed. "Let them go!

They all let go of their victims, and the people hurried up the stairs and out, disappearing.

"Down the stairs," Buffy barked, her eyes never leaving his pale blue ones.

Spike slowly backed down the stairs. Buffy forced Drusilla ahead of her, step by step, still holding the stake ready. When Buffy reached the top of the stairs, she prolonged the never-ending gaze into his eyes. For a brief moment, she looked even deeper into those sapphire pools, then abruptly broke it. She looked at Drusilla, and then shoved her down the stairs at Spike, turning and rushing out the door. She knew without even looking that he'd caught her lovingly and steadied her. She slammed the door with all her might as she went.

8 8 8

We heard Drusilla's laugh attack our ears with its strange, high pitched tone. It disturbed us, but then the smell of blood was so thick it intoxicated us. Laughing, we caught her around the waist and kissed, our fangs scraping against bloodied lips hungrily. Then, we slowly looked up to see what we had done, revelled in. What we had…

_You._

_I know you._

_Don't I?_

_This person. So full of anger._

_This person. So full of anger._

_This person, so full of hatred._

_This person, so full of hatred._

_Directed in and out and in and out…_

_Why do you hate yourself?_

_What do you gain by it?_

_What do **you** gain by it?_

_Why are we talking like this?_

_Why do we feel…?_

_Lurching. We all felt physically sick. A tsunami of… what was it? Not shame. Not guilt. It couldn't be. Defiance? Anger?_

_Really…_

_Shame?_

_Whatever it was, we all screamed as we were…_

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

…thrown apart violently. From the position in which they were sitting, Willow and Xander landed relatively safely on his armchair and couch, the pillows softening some of the impact. Buffy, Giles, and Spike, however, were actually blown apart to create minor depressions into the walls. It wasn't the physical force that stunned them, though. It was the huge recoil of emotional energy that had caused the physical force in the first place.

"Giles!"

Buffy leapt up, relatively unhurt. Spike was already moving as blood tainted the air. Willow and Xander looked on in shock as the unconscious Watcher was rolled over carefully by a grim-faced vampire, and a Slayer who arrived seconds later.

"We need an ambulance, _now_."

8 8 8


	33. A Stab in the Dark

**Chapter 31: A Stab in the Dark**

**Disclaimer: No ownership. I'm just perpetually on my knees before the altar of Jossverse. :P.**

**Rating: I think I'm boring everyone to death repeating the same thing each time. See the first fourteen chapters if you haven't, yet :)**

**Summary: This is the summary of the last couple of chapters and anything important I thought needed to be added. :D.**

**AU from the ending of Season 4. The timeline has been skewed because of Cassandra and Daniel's appearance, which means that Faith awakes a year later than she should have with less confusion. Although the bodyswap takes place, she chooses to go to Angel willingly, parting on fairly good terms with Buffy. Spike helped save Buffy when he realized it wasn't Buffy coming on to him, but Riley didn't, and slept with her. Big verbal fight between Riley, Buffy, and Spike, ending with Buffy storming out, Riley attempting (and then giving up) following her, and Spike who has become rather confused as of late as to his feelings about her following her and looking after her. Not is all emotional angst, however, as there are glimpses of a new Big Bad arising. Such a Big Bad that the Council has gotten rather worried and is thinking of making contact with Buffy again. Two new characters of Frederick, Travers' nephew, and Elspeth, Travers' daughter, added. Elspeth thinks of Buffy as a person, Frederick as an old-fashioned Council person would. Buffy has also revealed some interesting thoughts about Spike as she struggles to deal with her confusion, resulting in an intriguing conversation with Willow. Cassandra, Dawn, and Daniel have also started vaguely discussing what they'd seen the previous night. The gang met up at Giles' house and did the enjoinment spell again… only Spike refused to let them in and it resulted in a magical ripple that injured Giles. Cue in the familiar scene of Sunnydale Hospital…**

**A/N (Thank-you very much to kim for your review! Yes, they still aren't figuring Spike out… but hopefully they'll stop being dense soon. :D. I'm sorry for the lateness and the misguidance… homework decided to turn against me. I hope you enjoy this chapter, though. Now onto our regularly scheduled chapter! I hope you enjoy. )**

8 8 8

The sterile environment of the hospital didn't exactly leave much for them to do except for worry as they paced up and down, sat and fidgeted, hugged and talked, and leant against the wall ashen-faced respectively.

"He'll be okay, won't he?" Willow asked softly.

Tara smoothed her fingers over her hand. "Of course he will," soothed. "I think that…"

She suddenly realized everyone was looking to her. One hopeful, one loving, one startled, one curious, one interested, one with no recognizable expression on his face. She blushed and began stuttering.

"I… i-it's just what I think, b-but I d-don't think he got knocked unconscious. I t-think that the magic aftershock is to blame."

"That would make sense," Willow mused, and then smiled hopefully. "That means he'll be okay, right?"

"I don't think I want to make a judgment until we see the X-rays," Buffy continued fidgeting. "His arm looked funny."

"It didn't look that serious," Xander joined in, attempting to reassure both them and himself. "I mean, nothing seemed twisted where it shouldn't have been. Besides the arm."

"He didn't look too bad to me," Anya added helpfully. "Except for the whole knocked out thing, of course."

Spike stayed silent.

8 8 8

_Three hours ago…_

Giles' furrowed brow greeted them as soon as they stepped in through the door. His normally (somewhat) spotless apartment seemed as if a hurricane had passed through, with books scattered unevenly on every available surface instead of piled neatly as they usually were. It hadn't changed much since Daniel and Cassandra had moved in with him, albeit it was perhaps slightly messier. Today, however, testified silently to the seriousness of the situation to send Giles on such a desperate search through his personal library.

Buffy glanced around quickly, taking it all in with a look. "We're the first ones here? Did Xander and Anya go to pick up Spike?"

"Yeah, they did…" Willow managed to observe before a smoking vampire hurtled through the open door, before throwing the blanket off. "Aargh… ow!" he yelped, clutching at one of his pale hands that had turned a bright red. He turned to face them. "You know, there better be a good reason for waking me up like that."

The others ignored him, instead focusing on Giles. "Whoah, G-man," Xander forced lightness into his voice. "Another apocalypse? Oh wait, you look like that all the time."

"I told you not to call me that," Giles said absentmindedly as he ushered them in. "And we don't know yet. But it looks like something happened the other night that got the Council seriously worried."

"Wait," Willow steadied herself, surprise etching her features. "The Council?"

"Why did you think I was so freaked before?" Buffy laughed humourlessly. "But you didn't really say much on the phone, Giles. Why now?"

"I gave you a few of the reasons before…"

"Wait," Anya interrupted, a puzzled look on her face. "I don't understand. I feel as if everyone in this room knows what we're talking about and I don't. I feel excluded."

"Don't worry demon-girl," Spike's narrowed eyes darted between the speakers. "You're not the only one."

"Yes," Tara offered timidly. "C-c-could someone possibly g-give an explanation?" she looked around. "J-just so t-that we all know what we're dealing with."

Giles took off his glasses and began cleaning. Taking that as a sign that this was going to be a while, the group began assembling themselves onto his couch and armchairs, waiting impatiently for the Watcher to begin.

"Well," Giles took a deep breath. "This is going to take a while…"

"Try to summarize it," Buffy suggested flatly. "It sounded pretty urgent."

He sighed, looked around, and gestured at the state of the room. "Well, as you can no doubt see, I've tried researching it. But none of the books that I've found seem to match it."

"Match what, Watcher?" Spike demanded.

"Match what the Council has been describing."

"Which is?" Willow prompted helpfully.

Giles surveyed their faces soberly, taking in the expressions that ranged from annoyed to worried, apprehensive to relaxed, curious to bored, and a strange combination of all six. But mostly, he rested on the features of his Slayer, and the determination already written there.

_Ready for an apocalypse again. She's ready for the possibility of the world ending, she's ready to try with all her might to stop it._

_She's ready to die again, if need be._

"Uh… Giles?"

He snapped himself out of his sorrow-laden reverie, and placed the glasses in his hands back onto his eyes hurriedly. "Sorry, I was just thinking where to start and how to put this."

"Are you done?" queried Anya.

"Yes, I think I am," Giles nodded. "It appears that the Council's equipment have picked up massive surges of demonic energy lately, emerging from the Hellmouth..."

"You mean the Hellmouth is opening again?" Xander interrupted.

"Gee," Buffy rolled her eyes. "Isn't it a bit early?" she asked sarcastically. "By my calendar, it should be around two weeks from now."

"Now, Buffy," Giles said reprovingly. "This is actually…"

"I was joking, Giles."

"But can't you feel when the Hellmouth is open with your Slayer senses?" Anya demanded. "D'Hoffran always told me that you did."

The blonde Slayer sighed, and pulled her knees to her chest. "Yeah, I can," she affirmed. "It's like… this nagging in the back of my mind. It's really irritating. Happens whenever the Hellmouth is stirring."

"I get it too," Spike proffered. "Hellmouth demonic energy is powerful stuff. Why do you think I came to this sorry, sun-blighted excuse of a place?"

"I thought it was because you wanted to kill Buffy, but ended up getting your ass kicked again and again, deadboy," Xander chuckled.

Spike shot him a glare, but before he could retaliate, Giles had continued.

"Back to what I was saying before somebody interrupted me, what got the Council interested, and worried, might I add, was the fact that the demonic energy _wasn't coming from the Hellmouth itself_."

"Explain," Buffy said tersely. "In the past I thought the demons just drew on it to attempt their little world-ending scenarios."

"They described it as this." Giles proffered. "Imagine the Hellmouth as a mirror that multiplies the energy directed towards it and sends it back at the original source of the energy with ten times the amount put into it in the first place. That's what's causing these surges. Someone… or something, rather, is feeding off the Hellmouth, and it might trigger an opening if it keeps accelerating like this."

"How did the Council know about this, anyway?"

"Well," Giles rubbed his eyes from underneath his glasses. "It appears they still have been keeping an eye on the area, and us. They actually somehow recorded the energy shift from our enjoining spell."

The mere mention of it sent her nerve ends tingling. _I'll deal with the whole Council-spying-on-us thing later, _she promised herself. _For now…_

"That reminds me," Buffy looked at them all in the eye…

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

"What are you doing here?"

Riley blinked at the hostility in the redhead's voice. Her lips were pressed together thinly, her eyes dark and accusing.

"Uh…" he gestured to the card in his hand. "I heard Giles wasn't well. Just a get well card."

He shifted uncomfortably as she stared him through. "We've only been here for an hour, how did you know?"

The ex-soldier laughed uneasily, sidestepping the question. "What is this, an interrogation?" he sighed and shook his head. "Look, Willow," he said honestly. "I just wanted to give Giles this," he looked down at the card. "It's not really anything, I know. Just my well wishes."

Grudgingly, she stepped aside. He walked over carefully to where the others stood in a circle around a protesting Giles.

"Oh no, really, it's okay. Honestly… Buffy, stop that!"

"But why?" she pouted as she arranged the blankets one last time. "Now it looks more comfy."

"You gave us a bit of a fright," Riley smiled as he made his presence known.

Everything instantly went quiet. He shifted uncomfortably as he realized just how stupid following his impulses had been. It'd _seemed_ like a good idea at the time…

"What are you doing here, Riley?" Buffy asked coldly.

He winced, and held up the card, feeling rather pathetic. No, this had not been a good idea at all. "Just a get-well card. I heard you got hurt."

"How?"

"Look," he was beginning to get irritated. "I've already passed Willow's test," he stepped forwards and positioned the card on Giles' table, daring to brush softly against Buffy as he did so. She tensed beneath him, and he quickly withdrew. No forgiveness yet, it'd seem. "I just wanted to drop in and see if you were okay."

"I'm fine, thank-you Riley," Giles said coldly.

Riley looked at the faces that were regarding him, most of all at the face of the girl that he loved with all his heart. But also the girl he knew didn't love him back. Frost immobilized her features. He panned slowly across. Tara's was hesitant, Xander's bewildered. Anya was admiring the quality of the hospital gown. And Giles' was still cold.

"That's… that's good then," he shook his head. _What did I expect? _"I'll… um… I'll be off then. Get better soon," he smiled weakly.

He felt eyes in his back as he walked away, out of the room and down the sterile corridor. Nurses and doctors and orderlies hurried past as he kept walking. He felt… empty.

"Hey, wait up, man."

He turned around, surprised, and saw Xander standing before him.

"Hey, wasn't expecting you to really come after me…"

Riley fell silent at the expression on his face. Xander stood before him for a long time, the fluorescent lighting chasing away all shadow from his face except for the ones under his eyes.

"Why?"

"Why what?" Riley replied.

"You know why, Riley."

He sighed, and leaned against the wall. "I don't know," he said finally. "She seemed… I didn't do it deliberately. You know that."

"Yeah, I do," Xander agreed. "I just don't get how you…"

Riley's eyes stopped him. "It doesn't matter now, does it? I did, and now she hates me."

"I wouldn't say that," Xander said carefully. "But…"

"And you think I was wrong too," he accused. "You think it's unforgivable, don't you?"

"You hurt her," Xander stated simply.

"I know," he answered, and then walked away.

8 8 8

Cassandra felt horrible for taking advantage of the situation.

"Should we really be doing this?" she asked as Daniel dumped in schoolbag at the door and began immediately sifting through things.

"This could be one of our only chances to get at Giles' books together," Dawn reasoned as she too began searching. "Mum's coming in about an hour and a half, so we need to move fast."

"I hope he's okay," Cass worried.

"Yeah," Dawn agreed, leafing through a concise dictionary of Latin spell derivatives. "I got such a shock when Mum rung the school."

Silently, they searched the area haphazardly, attempting to put everything back where they'd found it. It was hard going.

"What are we really looking for, anyway?" Dawn asked after a while.

"Some hints of a ritual of some sort," Daniel proffered.

She shot a dirty look at him. She still hadn't completely forgiven him over his previous behaviour. "Thanks, that was really enlightening," she replied sarcastically.

"Okay," he took a deep breath, and Cass saw the haunted look jump straight back into his eyes. "Look for a knife."

"What kind of knife?"

He turned back to flipping through forbidden books before he answered.

"One that looks like it could swallow the sun."

Silently, they kept searching.

An hour and twenty minutes later, however, they'd still come up with nothing. "This isn't working," Daniel said, frustrated.

They'd combed the main room, discarding the books they hadn't thought were relevant. Still, it was a near impossible task. Giles' library was far more extensive than they had thought, certainly.

"We only have another ten minutes," Dawn said anxiously. "Let's just get what we can… a knife, did you say?"

Cassandra fidgeted uncomfortably. They all remembered the stark silence that had greeted Daniel's hoarse description before, that aura of dread and darkness that had permeated the very air.

"Yes," she affirmed quietly. "A knife."

They searched amongst the books again for what seemed a millennia, until both Daniel and Dawn looked up and realized that Cassandra had frozen over a page, her eyes wide.

"What?" Dawn scrambled over to check. "Have you found it?"

Cass gulped. "Yeah," she said, her throat rasping. "I think I have."

The bell rung.

8 8 8

What do you want me to say?

Well, come on. What do you want me to say?

That I felt guilty for the Watcher getting hurt?

No.

I didn't.

There. Now bugger off. I don't want to talk any more…

Stop it! Not your eyes. I don't want your pity! Just… go!

8 8 8


	34. Blinded by Security

**Chapter 32: Blinded by Security**

**Disclaimer: No ownership. I'm just perpetually on my knees before the altar of Jossverse. :P.**

**Rating: I think I'm boring everyone to death repeating the same thing each time. See the first fourteen chapters if you haven't, yet :)**

**Summary: This is the summary of the last couple of chapters and anything important I thought needed to be added. :D.**

**AU from the ending of Season 4. Not is all emotional angst… there are glimpses of a new Big Bad arising. Such a Big Bad that the Council has gotten rather worried and is thinking of making contact with Buffy again. Two new characters of Frederick, Travers' nephew, and Elspeth, Travers' daughter, added. Elspeth thinks of Buffy as a person, Frederick as an old-fashioned Council person would. Buffy has also revealed some interesting thoughts about Spike as she struggles to deal with her confusion, resulting in an intriguing conversation with Willow. Cassandra, Dawn, and Daniel have also started vaguely discussing what they'd seen the previous night. The gang met up at Giles' house where he explains that the Council has been spying on them and making their own conclusions about the Big Bad, and they did the enjoinment spell again… only Spike refused to let them in and it resulted in a magical ripple that injured Giles. Cue in the familiar scene of Sunnydale Hospital…**

**Riley also decides to drop in here, having a small talk with Xander about how he's hurt Buffy. Also, Cassandra and Daniel have taken advantage of the situation to do a little study…**

**A/N (Thank-you very much to kim, escudo, and Autumnevening for your reviews! I'm sorry for prolonging the suspense… hopefully you'll find some answers answered in the next few chapters. :D. Escudo: you will have found that I have changed and uploaded every single chapter anew with this new format of having everything non-story related in bold. Hopefully this will clear up your confusion. And thanks for your kind words, Autumnevening. :D. I'm glad you're enjoying it.**

**Here, I must apologize for the really, really, really large delay. The reason is that I actually had to spend two nights uploading and changing all of the chapters to the new format, and also as I have exams very soon and it's been hectic. Rest assured, however, that after exams (in three weeks time) I shall be posting regularly again. :D. Thank you so much for being patient. Now onto our regularly scheduled chapter! I hope you enjoy. )**

8 8 8

The wind rushed past his face as he ran, calling upon all of his vampiric speed to chase after the figure running away from him. It wasn't a hunt. What was it?

"Wait up, will you!" he yelled.

Instantly, the figure stopped, and turned around. Spike stumbled back at the bright light that encompassed it, shielding his eyes with a gasp. Not sunlight. More… holy? Through the golden fire, he could make out features of an androgynous beauty. When it opened its mouth, he stared in wonder as two voices came out, a man and a woman's, weaving together in a perfect harmony.

"You have been chasing me long, William the Bloody. Why?"

The bleached blonde vampire tentatively stood up and walked closer, until he was around one meter away. Then, for no apparent reason, he felt his legs move and he knelt, staring down at the ground where it had trod. Words sprung to his mouth unassisted.

"Because I am your slave, Mistress."

It laughed, then, a bell-like tone that sounded beautiful to his ears. It reached forwards and cupped two fingers underneath his chin and raised his face to look into its eyes. He avoided them.

"Look at me, William."

He refused. "I… I am not worthy."

Another laugh, but the fingers became firmer. "You have blood on your hands, on every part of your body, yes. But you are worthy, for you still chase me, do you not?"

His voice cracked. "Yes. Forever."

It began to fade, then. "You have much of me already. Just a few more steps, William. Keep holding on like you always have. And never give up."

A flash of Spike snapped back. "I'm not one for giving up."

It laughed again. "That's what we're counting on…"

8 8 8

"Thank you. I-I'll be fine, thanks."

Giles sighed as he moved creakily through the door, utter exhaustion paling his face. Joyce looked on in concern.

"Are you alright?" she asked again. "If you want, we can come in for a while."

She watched as Cassandra and Daniel said their last goodbyes to Dawn and joined them on the threshold. Giles did too, a weary smile crossing over his face. The first three weeks living with two teenagers had been incredibly trying for him. He was used to waking up to silence.

_Giles woke with a gasp, and then slumped back onto his pillow with a sigh. It was a dream. Just a bad dream. He sat up and stretched slightly in his bed, and then relaxed again. Buffy wasn't coming over to train for another two hours, so he could afford another extra half-hour before his daily run today. Just as his eyes were about to fall, though, there was a timid knock on his door._

_He sat bolt upright immediately, confusion turning to suspicion and even a hint of fear. It couldn't be Buffy; she would have rung if she was coming this early. There was no one else in the house, nothing wrong… a demon? Dead silence pervaded the house. The nightmare he'd experienced only five minutes ago jolted his fear._

_The knock came again, and then the door creaked open. He let out an unmanly shriek. "Get back! I know who you are!"_

"_Whoah, sorry," Daniel stepped back. "I just wanted to ask you where the milk was."_

_Giles' heart began beating again. "Give me a few minutes," he said faintly, waving him away. "I'll come down."_

_Daniel winced at his expression. "Sorry, I shouldn't have bothered you."_

"_Just give me a few minutes…"_

"Giles?"

Giles snapped back to reality. "Sorry… um, I was thinking about something."

Joyce looked at him concernedly. "Are you sure you're okay, Giles?"

"Oh… oh yes, I am," he said distractedly. "Cassandra, Daniel? Are you coming in?"

They waved one last time and slipped in beside him. Joyce shifted her purse onto her shoulder with one last worried glance. "Are you sure that you will be okay? Because Buffy's staying out tonight, we can keep you company for a while without bothering her. Or we could ring her and…"

"No, really," Giles chuckled tiredly. "I'm sure I've taken enough of your time today. I'm sorry."

"Don't be," she shook her head. "You're welcome."

He offered a shy, Giles-like smile. "I-if you want, you can all come over sometime for dinner."

"When your arm is better," she smiled back. "That would be nice. Now, look after yourself. And Cass? Dan? Look after him."

"We will," Daniel grinned.

He watched her as she walked back down to the car where Dawn was waiting. Watched the car speed off into the night. He sighed, and shifted his arm again, wincing as the resulting pain snaked through his entire body. The painkillers were still in effect, but he found they only dulled it slightly.

"Don't do that," Daniel reprimanded him as he guided him to a chair. "Sit and rest for a while."

Giles gave him a half-irritated, half-amused look. "You don't have to mother me, you know."

"I'm not mothering you," he replied practically. "I'm looking after you because your shoulder's fractured."

"So, who's cooking then?" Giles raised an eyebrow.

"I am," Cass moved quietly out of the kitchen, a gentle smile on her face as she watched Daniel minister his 'medical' knowledge. "I might not be as good as you or Dan, but I'm sure I'll be able to do something while Dan shows off."

"Hey," he objected, grinning at her gentle teasing. "I do _not_ show off."

"Mr. My-dad-is-a-doctor," she laughed.

Giles coughed, and sighed. And he'd had to deal with the teenage banter as well.

8 8 8

It faded, and he found himself kneeling in the dust. It rose up around him, hazing him in a cloud of grey. He stood, slightly shaking, and immediately controlled himself. Instinctively, his hands went to his body, but his duster had vanished.

"Just when I needed some smokes," he muttered, moving out of his meagre protection cautiously. A growing sense of unease quickly swallowed the peace the touch of the being had given him. Something was around. He could smell it, taste it, feel it…

"Hello, vampire."

Spike spun around as all of his danger senses went into overdrive. He stared in wary suspicion at the small man in around three meters in front of him, around a head shorter than him. His only weapon appeared to be his long, curved metallic claws that seemed fused to his hand. Despite his unimpressive physical stature, Spike felt himself tensing. This person was dangerous.

"My name's William the Bloody," he grinned, his fangs extending a little. "Or Spike. What's yours?"

Before the man could reply, Spike was already moving. He spun around in a flurry of roundhouses before he was bodily thrown by one whipping leg. He quickly recovered from his shock and bounced back onto his feet, eyeing his opponent even more warily now at how easily his attack was fended off.

"Well now," the murmured calmly, stroking his talons. "For all you knew I could be trying to help you."

"I know you're not," the bleached-blonde answered.

"But you have no evidence that supports that," the man pointed out reasonably, watching as Spike circled him.

"I can feel it in my blood," Spike snapped. "That's good enough for me."

"And you trust your blood all the time?"

"Never let me down."

The man suddenly attacked, raking his claws across Spike's cheek. The vampire yelped and kicked him hard to the stomach. Fluidly, he rolled away and stood up again.

"Do you know why?" he asked mildly, licking his claws clean.

"No, I soddin' well don't know why," Spike replied angrily as the blood coursed in rivulets down his face. "Only thing I know at the moment is I really want to rip your head off an'…"

"Calm down, vampire," the being commanded sternly. "You do not do well to enter a fight with your blood speaking instead of your brain."

"I have a name y'know," he snarled back. "An' I know that you know it. Besides, this is how I live. Blood is what I live, what I die for."

A spark of curiosity flickered in his eyes. "How do you mean?"

"Everything I do is for blood," Spike replied matter-of-factly. "The nights out hunting, with the stars as my witness. And the days spent sleeping, resting for another hunt. It's what I do."

"No," the being disagreed softly. "What other, with your blood? That is not the only reason."

"And you would know?" Spike shot back contemptuously.

He leapt forwards quicker than lightning and Spike could only throw his hands up in front of his face. He roared. The metallic claws sliced through his arms until they hit bone, but that wasn't the reason behind the stinging pain. The other hand, its left hand, had gone straight for his chest and dragged five parallel lines deep into his left side, until his unbeating, undead heart lay bloody and exposed through his ribs. Even as Spike fell to the ground in pain, the man was back in position, studying him intently again as if he were merely a specimen to be dissected.

"So do you have a heart that pumps this blood you so yearn for?" he asked softly.

Even though his body screamed in agony, Spike couldn't resist a retort. "Beatin' as much as yours will be after I'm done with you."

"Now, really," an amused smile flitted over his face. "You're bleeding to death, vampire. Do you really expect me to believe that…?"

He never finished his sentence. Without thinking, fire flashed in golden eyes, and then Spike had covered the distance between them in two quick steps, with half of his front ripped open, and savagely tore his throat out.

In shock, Spike stared at the mangled flesh in his hand, blood dripping over pale alabaster skin. He didn't realize it, but his wounds were already covering up, healing impossibly quickly as he stood transfixed.

After an eternity, when his flesh was flawless once again, he looked down at the body and tossed the throat back into the gaping hole.

"I'm sick of people underestimating me," he whispered softly, before stalking away, his leather duster appearing out of nowhere to settle snugly around his lean frame and billow in the breeze…

8 8 8

Giles was flipping through the books, a crease in his forehead as he attempted to manoeuvre the larger ones aside with one arm in search for

"That's strange," he muttered out loud. "I could have sworn I left it here…"

Frowning as he pondered, his ears picked up whispers coming from upstairs. His frown grew deeper as he slowly made his way upwards, his sling bouncing slightly against his chest as he ascended. The voices grew minutely louder, until he rapped on the door.

"Yes Giles?" Cassandra's luminous eyes stared back at him from the half-darkness of the corridor. "Do you need anything? Sorry, we didn't mean to…"

He half-smiled. "No, no, it's quite alright. It's just… there was a book that I was looking at before, and I can't seem to find it now… do you know what happened to volume 5 and 6 of 'The Facets of Evil'?"

Daniel joined Cassandra behind the door. "Sorry, Giles, we haven't seen it. We were flipping through a few books before… but that wasn't one of them."

Giles sighed somewhat exasperatedly. He remembered the conversation they had had all too well.

"_Have you been looking through my books again, Cassandra?"_

"_What? Um… no?" she replied nervously, pushing the offending article back onto the table. "Just… uh… well…"_

_He frowned. "Cassandra, you are not to mess with some of these books. You know that some are highly dangerous… and you shouldn't be reading some of them and your age either."_

"_You know you won't be able to keep her out of them," Daniel laughed as he walked in from the kitchen, not a speck of flour on his shirt even though he'd been handling it for the past half an hour. _

"_Maybe a compromise?" Cassandra's eyes brightened up at the idea. "You could put all the books you don't think I should see into that cupboard and leave the rest?"_

"_No, I can't," Giles said testily. "You don't seem to realize the dangers of this, Cassandra, not to mention the impression some of these diagrams and books may have on you. Not for another two years at least."_

_She looked directly at him. "Giles, if I'm going to live here… if you're going to trust me when these 'feelings' come to me, then I need to know what I'm talking about."_

_He opened his mouth, then closed it, and then thought about it for a while. He hadn't properly had time to talk to her about that… there'd been too much going on. He sighed, heavily._

"_I wouldn't even allow Dawn to have a look…"_

"_Compromise," Daniel echoed Cassandra._

_He looked at them, and saw the stubbornness shining in their eyes. And sighed._

"_We'll talk about this properly later."_

"_Sure."_

"You stayed away from the ones on the bottom five shelves, didn't you?" Giles asked. "And the ones in the oak cupboard…"

"Yes, Giles," Cassandra nodded. "I did."

"Very well, then. Sorry to have bothered you."

"No problem at all," Daniel replied cheerfully. "You sure you don't need anything?"

The half-smile crept over Giles' face again. "I'm quite sure, thank-you, Daniel."

He walked away, and the arc of light the open door left vanished, leaving him in the dark until he reached the staircase.

8 8 8

"What now?" Spike yelled out at the empty nothingness. "What are you going to throw at me now?"

"Oh my sweet William… the stars are blazing bright tonight."

If his heart beat, it would have stopped for an eternity.

"Dru…?"

She came swaying out of the shadows, dancing in that hypnotic way of hers as her eyes drew him into their bloodless depths. He staggered backwards unconsciously, but a wall that hadn't been there appeared and he crashed into it, sliding down to stare upwards at her in shock.

"So fiery they are…" she sang, moving closer. "Fiery like blood. Blood that's coming… so much blood."

"Dru… what are you doing here?"

She swayed her hips as she bent down to his eye level and caressed his forehead with painted nails. Ignoring his question, she knelt down and whispered sensuously in his ear.

"The darkness is opening once more… stars and blood so bright, sweet William. Won't you come with me and taste it again?"

He felt a tingling at the base of his spine, a chill that ran through his entire body. He knew this feeling well.

"What are you talking about, Dru?" he asked urgently.

"Oh come… come with me…" she nipped his earlobe. "The sunshine won't come out every day, you know. But I'll be here forever…"

"No you won't," he couldn't help lashing out at her. "You left me, time and again you did."

She growled and nipped harder. "Naughty William," she hissed, backing away with his blood on her fangs, disappearing into the black. The last words came out of the shadows, just before her eyes were swallowed up by night.

"Won't learn. But the darkness will change that."

8 8 8


	35. Sun Bright

**Chapter 33: Sun Bright**

**Disclaimer: No ownership. I'm just perpetually on my knees before the altar of Jossverse. :P.**

**Rating: I think I'm boring everyone to death repeating the same thing each time. See the first fourteen chapters if you haven't, yet :)**

**Summary: This is the summary of the last couple of chapters and anything important I thought needed to be added. :D.**

**AU from the ending of Season 4. Riley has a small talk with Xander about how he's hurt Buffy. Also, Cassandra and Daniel have taken advantage of the situation to do a little study. Giles returns home and is taken care of, until the study is resumed. Spike, however, has been caught in a myriad of dreams, that lead finally to Drusilla appearing with some very cryptic messages.**

**A/N (Thank-you very much to kim, escudo, and Autumnevening for your reviews! I'm sorry for prolonging the suspense… hopefully you'll find some answers answered in the next few chapters. :D. Escudo: you will have found that I have changed and uploaded every single chapter anew with this new format of having everything non-story related in bold. Hopefully this will clear up your confusion. And thanks for your kind words, Autumnevening. :D. I'm glad you're enjoying it.**

**Here, I must apologize for the really, really, really large delay. I know… I just keep doing it, don't I? . . It's a bad habit, it is. But now, exams and school have both finished, so I really have no excuses. :P. So promises of quicker writing, and hopefully back to the once-a-week updating: D. Thank you so much for being patient. Thank you too, to Kim, Autumnevening, and Dreylin for commenting. I'm glad you enjoyed it: D. To Dreylin… I'll try to work on the parts that you've asked me to work on, but I'm glad that overall you're enjoying it. Thank you all for reviewing!**

**Now onto our regularly scheduled chapter! I hope you enjoy. )**

8 8 8

Daniel flicked the pages carefully, one by one. The desk lamp made their eyes glow as they huddled together, soberly appraising the words that lay before them. Their eyes periodically widened and narrowed as they perused them, the flickering shadows of the night outside the window adding to the shiver they felt run down their spines.

After what seemed an hour of reading, Cassandra glanced at her watch. "We're only a quarter of the way in… and it's 12:30 already," she lamented.

"Holy…" Daniel stopped himself in time. "But we have school tomorrow!"

Cassandra laughed. "It's Saturday tomorrow, silly."

"Good point," he chuckled back, before his eyes moved back to the book in front of them and his face grew serious again. "God…" he breathed softly.

She swallowed.

"I'm not sure that's the name you're looking for."

8 8 8

The morning dawned bright and sunny… like almost every single morning in Sunnydale. Willow yawned and snuggled closer to Tara.

"Wake me up when classes start," she said sleepily.

The blonde witch smiled, that beautiful, gentle smile that Willow loved so much. "Of course," she replied, and they both closed their eyes again, one drifting off to sleep.

The next time Willow awoke, it was because her body had finally noticed that something was missing. Blinking sleepily, she levered herself up to prop herself on her elbow, and watched her lover frown slightly as her hands smoothed the pages of a thick, sturdy volume from their bookshelf.

"Tara?"

"Oh, sorry!" Tara's head flew up. "I-I… I didn't mean to leave you there by yourself. It's just this book… it was calling me."

"Calling you?" Willow asked inquisitively, sitting up now and hugging her knees. "What do you mean?"

Tara frowned again as she looked down to the words. "It was like… like… when I opened my eyes again, it called me from across the room and I… I n-needed to open it."

"What is it, Tara?"

" 'Divining & Prophecy: Through the Ages Book III'."

"Ooh! That's the one that Giles said he was missing when we went through to try to look for what Daniel and Cassandra told us…"

"Yes," Tara agreed. "But I… I d-don't know how it came to be here. I haven't s-seen it in the bookshelf before."

"Neither have I," their eyes joined. Silently, Willow crawled out of bed and crossed the distance between them. Standing behind Tara, enough so that she could follow the book in front of them, she placed her hands on her shoulders in a gesture of comfort as they read together, the seconds blurring into minutes.

The alarm clock rang.

Jumping out of their startled stasis, Willow was the first to move and silence it. 9 o'clock, half an hour before their first class.

Their eyes met again. "Do you think we should skip?" Willow asked in a hushed whisper.

"M-maybe," Tara answered hesitantly. "I mean… I don't think my next class is t-too important."

"I can't believe I'm saying this, but neither is mine," Willow glanced briefly at the clock again. "But let me grab some breakfast for us both, first." Her face brightened. "What do you want?"

"I don't mind," Tara allowed herself a little smile at her girlfriend's sudden perkiness. "W-whatever you want."

She watched as Willow almost skipped out the door, and then moved back to reading, letting the slight crease in her brow shadow her face once again.

8 8 8

"God, the Maths homework she gave us was awful," Dawn moaned as soon as they'd dumped their books in the relative safety of Giles' house. "Did you try it last night? I was trying it before… it'll never be ready by Monday."

Giles was currently still ensconced at the Magic Box, so they'd decided it was safe enough to begin filling Dawn in and researching further. They'd originally planned to meet at Revello, but they'd decided to meet at the library instead to investigate deeper into any other texts that could shed some light on the situation.

"Yeah, it was," Daniel agreed, shuddering at the remembrance. "We did it just before we started reading the book."

Cassandra chuckled. "Oh come on, it wasn't as bad as it usually is."

Dawn snorted. "Yeah, just because you got 97 in the last maths test."

Cassandra opened her mouth, but Daniel cut in again.

"You can't deny it," he laughed. "It was all there in red pen, circled around twice with two underlines beneath it."

"I wasn't going to deny it," she protested. "But…"

"Okay, chill guys," Dawn's face turned sober. "We've got two hours before Giles comes back from the Magic Box, so let's make the most of it. Where's the book you were telling me about?"

At the mention of the book, the humour left their eyes. "Right, it's upstairs. Along with the notes we made."

Dawn chuckled. "You guys took notes?"

They shared a glance, each remembering the night before that had bled into this morning.

8 8 8

The night was cool, and the stars glittered like fierce diamonds in the deep blue sky as he stared up at them. It was beautiful. So far away and yet so close, if he could almost reach out and…

Hesitantly, before he even thought about it, the bleached blonde vampire stretched out a hand, and to his utter astonishment, his suddenly clenched fist came away from the sky with a golden glow. He stared at it in wonder. Slowly, he uncurled his fist and _looked_…

It was beautiful. So beautiful. His undead heart soared. Hesitantly, slowly, he reached out the other hand and cupped it with both…

That was when it started to hurt.

It started as a tingle, then as a numb ache, before progressively getting hotter. Soon he was clenching his teeth against the pain and his skin began to sizzle. He watched in horror as his hands started writhing convulsively in pain, yet still cupped protectively around the fire. He screamed, and a voice in his mind woke up.

_Letgoletgoletgoletgoletgoletgoletgoletgoletgoletgoletgoletgoletgoletgoletgoletgoletgoletgoletgoletgoletgoletgoletgoletgoletgoletgoletgoletgoletgoletgoletgoletgoletgoletgoletgoletgo…_

"No!" he shouted back. He had no idea why. Every fibre of his being was shrieking at him to release the fire, to throw away the warmth, to surrender the stars. Every instinct in him of self-preservation and self-awareness knew that he had to let go or else the flame would consume him and he would burn until there was nothing left.

Every fibre, every instinct, every voice except for one.

_But I've been looking for the sun all my life…_

_And this is it…_

_You know it…_

_You've found the stars…_

Spike stayed locked in stasis for another two minutes, an agonizing wait as he watched the stars and the fire in his hands leapt higher and higher until his eyes were lit up and his entire body felt the searing warmth and heat and beauty and pain in equal measure.

_It hurts… Oh bloody soddin' hell it hurts…_

_Hold on, William, it is almost over…_

"What's almost over!" he howled out aloud to the night and the moon and the pitiless, beautiful stars.

"The pain."

He whirled around, his body suddenly free of whatever had frozen him. As his eyes fell on her, his mouth formed a perfect O as the light from his hands immediately stopped burning. The flame licked his skin gently now, warming him… filling him with a sense of completeness.

It felt like he was in heaven.

"S… Slayer?"

She stood there, her shampoo-commercial hair tossed in waves down her back, smiling cryptically at him. She toyed with a stake in her right hand, flipping it up and catching it, over and over again.

"Of course," she stepped forwards. "I'm sorry I'm late for patrol."

"No… no problem," he stared at her stunned as she moved into step besides him and they began walking slowly around the cemetery, his hands still glowing with a fire that she seemed oblivious to.

He didn't know how they long they walked, restfully, peacefully, with the occasional good-natured snark and friendly whack. After a while, though, when it seemed they'd combed all the spots that they (usually? He wondered) did, she wrinkled her nose.

"It's quiet tonight. There's nothing demony."

"Like the dead, love," he agreed.

She smiled and whacked him on the shoulder. "That was lame."

"Tell me you weren't thinking the same," he replied, grinning.

"Do you wanna spar?"

A fierce longing suddenly rushed up in him, and he fixed her with a feral smile, his fangs extending and his eyes gleaming golden as he went into gameface. "Always, love."

She smirked back at him. "Let's see if you can take me."

"Ooh, Slayer," he growled. "That was a challenge."

Moving in synchronicity, the two fighters suddenly flew at each other, punching and kicking, flying into the air as they blocked again and again, revelling in the pure joy of it, the pure joy of them. Never had they come up against an enemy with the same fire, the same life and fervour...

Suddenly, he saw an opening and he lunged forwards, bringing her down to the ground and her arms and legs pinned. His fangs flashed down automatically and grazed her skin, and then he was overwhelmed with the intoxicating scent of Slayer blood…

Something in him pulled back, and unconsciously, he switched back to his human guise. Startled green eyes met with blue.

And then the green eyes narrowed, snapping with fury.

Buffy bucked her hips violently and sent him flying over her head. He scrambled up as she flipped herself to her feet and advanced on him.

"What the hell was that?" she hissed.

"I…"

"We were supposed to be just sparring! You could have killed me!"

Spike felt his own anger flare at her 'righteous indignation.' "I'm a vampire, love," he snarled. "I just went against everything I am not to kill you. You should be thanking me. In fact, I'm not sure why I even bothered to…"

"You're a pig, Spike," she moved forwards. "I thought I could trust you, but now…" the stake appeared in her hand again, and her face grew hard. "You're a killer, Spike. And I shoulda done this _years_ ago."

Glittering eyes met again in a contest of wills. Finally, the vampire snapped.

"You know what?" he demanded angrily. "Do it. Bloody just do it."

Buffy stared in shock. That was one response she hadn't anticipated. "What?"

He ground it out for her, slowly, so she got the idea. "End ... my ... torment. Seeing you, every day, everywhere I go, every time I turn around. Take me ... out of a world ... that has you in it!"

He threw off his duster and yanked off his shirt, exposing his marbled chest. "Just kill me!"

Buffy kept staring at him, and then suddenly she lunged. Spike winced as he anticipated the stake, but nothing happened. She froze, and they looked deeply into each others' eyes again. Suddenly, Spike grabbed Buffy by the upper arms and kissed her hungrily.

Neither of them noticed the fire still glowing in his hands fill her as well until they were both glowing as she returned the kiss just as passionately. The stake disappeared from her hand as they lost themselves in each other for the moment…

Just as suddenly as the kiss was initiated, she pulled back with a small cry of dismay, her hand flying to her mouth. He didn't move, frozen to the spot just like he had been before, but his eyes followed her longingly. Already he missed the fire, the beauty…

An eternity of a second…

She stepped forwards again, her face resolute as if she had just come to a decision. Pulling his head down towards her, she kissed him again. Spike moaned and brought his hands up to stroke her back, kissing her cheek and the side of her neck.

"Oh god," Buffy panted. "Spike… I want you."

He buried his face in the side of the neck he'd bitten, nuzzling and licking gently. She moaned again. "Buffy, I love you…"

He pressed another kiss to her now gleaming neck. "God, I love you so much…"

8 8 8

He woke with a gasp.

"Oh no!"

_You know it's true._

He gulped. Sucked in unneeded breath.

"God no…" he breathed.

_Oh God it's true…_

8 8 8

The knock on the door sounded again.

Tiredly, Buffy made her way down the stairs. Joyce was working late at the gallery tonight, and Dawn was still over at Giles'. She peeked through the door briefly, and her face froze into stone.

She yanked the door open.

"What do you want?" she asked coldly.

Riley stood against the night, bags under his eyes and a weariness in his stance. "Hello, Buffy."

"What do you want?" she repeated.

He opened his mouth, and then shivered as a cold gust of wind assaulted him. He attempted a smile. "Can I come in?"

Guardedly, she let the door open fully, and he stepped into the relative warmth of the house, his eyes never leaving her as she went to close the door behind him. They were both concentrating warily on the other so much that they didn't even notice the shadow that slipped in from the street, using his vampiric senses to pick up each and every single word that flowed through the slightly opened window.

"What do you want, Riley? I'm asking this for the last time. If you don't give me an answer I like, then you're out."

He avoided her gaze for a second, before looking up. "I want to make things perfect again."

"Why?"

He stared at her in disbelief.

"Don't do this to me, Buffy," his voice caught in his throat. "Don't do this to me. You know why. I love you."

"Yeah. You love me and you can't even tell if it's me or some other random you're…"

The pain and the hurt and the anger bubbled below the surface. She waited for him to say something. She knew that he felt it. But the insecurity and worry and the loss and betrayal seethed below that, and one look at him made her realize that he was oblivious to it.

"All I'm asking," Riley interrupted as his eyes bored into Buffy's. "Is that you give me another chance."

Spike saw her hesitate.

"Please," he entreated her softly. "I'm only…"

His words were cut off as Buffy leaned in to silence him. Riley's face melted into a smile as he kissed her back, but the vampire wasn't concentrating on his face. He was concentrating on hers, even as he felt his undead heart screaming inside him and his demon surged within. Concentrating on the desperation that clouded her beautiful eyes and the denial in her body as she clung to him.

_You don't love him! _Spike wanted to scream. _You don't and you never will… Why! Why did you take him back!_

Somehow, he managed to internalise his rage and pain and grief as he watched them through the window. Then, feeling as if someone had frozen his cold, unbeating heart, he stumbled back to the graveyard and to the deadness of his crypt.

8 8 8

"There," Dan pointed grimly. "Read that there."

Dawn's eyes followed his fingers.

_When the starred ones come,_

_It shall be the sign,_

_That the paths diverged,_

_Shall again be entwined_

_Coalesced into one,_

_To join the other threads,_

_One to fulfilment,_

_And one to dread_

_The one who brings balance,_

_The one who knows well,_

_The other inside,_

_Who could bring all to hell_

Dawn gulped. "God…"

Cassandra nodded soberly. "That's what Daniel said."

8 8 8


	36. Time after Time

**Chapter 34: Time after Time**

**Disclaimer: No ownership. I'm just perpetually on my knees before the altar of Jossverse. :P.**

**Rating: I think I'm boring everyone to death repeating the same thing each time. See the first fourteen chapters if you haven't, yet :)**

**Summary: This is the summary of the last couple of chapters and anything important I thought needed to be added. :D.**

**AU from the ending of Season 4. Riley and Buffy have 'made up', while Spike has finally realized his true feelings for Buffy. Daniel, Cassandra, and Dawn, have also uncovered and old poem that may or may not be a prophecy. And, as all prophecies are wont to be, it's cryptic and doesn't make sense :P.**

**A/N (Thank-you very much to kim and Dreylin for your reviews! I'm sorry about the story being a bit hard to follow in places… maybe someone can help me to clear up the hard-to-follow parts by pointing them out? I'm glad you like the pacing and characterizations, though. I plan to expand more upon Daniel and Cassandra's part, because they're playing quite minor roles at the moment, to tell the truth. I'll also try to work on the clarity of this. :D. Thanks, also, to kim, for your constant reviews so far. :D. Spike's internal yelling definitely has a point, but Buffy's too far in denial to see it. Of course, she'll wake up soon to that, hopefully :P. And about your guesses for the passage? Well… your guess is as good as mine :P. Thankyou again both of you for reviewing!)**

**Hmm… it looks like I didn't manage to do the one-chapter-a-week thing. However, a good note is that my writer's block has almost completely vanished, so I'll try to make it up to you! Thank you for all the support, guys. That's what is keeping me going. :D**

**Now onto our cough regularly cough scheduled chapter! I hope you enjoy. : )**

8 8 8

Home alone.

In Sunnydale.

Was…

A very, very, very…

Scary thought…

Okay, fine. So technically they weren't alone. And technically they had done this before. But time had been when the sun was still shining cheerfully, upholding the town's name, and so didn't have the problem of moonshadows chasing themselves across ever corner of the room that the electric lights faded near, and the ominous threat of creaking noises and doors banging shut from the wind (or something else, they feared) or other suspicious happenings like squeaking doors that opened by themselves.

Which was the situation they were in now.

"Where the hell is Giles?" Dawn demanded agitatedly. "He should have been here hours ago."

"He probably got caught up in the Magic Box," Cassandra proffered.

"It's not like him, though," Daniel fretted, jumping again when a tree branch scraped against a window. "He usually rings, at least."

"I'm more worried about your mum at the moment, actually," Cassandra unconsciously twisted a strand of black hair around her fingers like she did when she was nervous. "She should have been here an hour ago. I hope everything's alright."

"Well… she gets held up at the gallery a lot," Dawn said dubiously. "I'm just…"

"Aaahhh!" they collectively shrieked as something thudded upstairs.

They huddled together for about fifteen minutes in complete silence, memories of the subtle and not-so-subtle warnings of danger ahead from the book spread in front of them echoing in their heads.

"'All to hell' is never a good thing, is it?" Cassandra finally piped up nervously.

Daniel jumped as the same branch squeaked across the window.

"No, it's not," he and Dawn agreed simultaneously.

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

The sun was beginning to sink down in the horizon, painting the sky in a multitude of beautiful, bright pastel colours. Joyce fumbled in her purse for the keys for a few seconds, before fishing them out and finally locking the doors, the key making a satisfying '_snick'_ as she turned it. She laughed.

"Are you serious?"

"Yes," Mary giggled, brushing her straight, honey-brown hair out of her face. "I thought he was just interested in the Russian pottery…"

"Well, he must have been more than interested if you managed to convince him to buy three different pots," Joyce grinned roguishly as their high heels clacked along the pavement to the waiting carpark. "And not just interested in the pots, either."

Mary blushed. "I… I had no idea."

Joyce tut-tutted. "Come now, Mary," she smiled warmly. "Don't tell me you of all people don't know how to see the signs."

The youthful assistant blushed even deeper. "Signs?" a sudden coy smirk graced her face. "Well… perhaps. I don't have the years of experience, though, Mrs. Summers."

Joyce chuckled as the carpark grew closer. "Experience only plays a little part, Mary. And you don't have to keep calling me Mrs. Summers, you know. 'Joyce' is fi…"

She stopped abruptly. A strange expression crossed her face. Mary stopped a few steps after she realized that the older woman wasn't walking beside her any more.

"Mrs. Summers?"

Mary looked behind her, to see Joyce swaying slightly, her eyes open in surprise.

"I think…" Joyce falteringly pressed a hand to her forehead, "I…"

Mary screamed as she watched her keel slowly forwards and collapse onto the ground.

8 8 8

Was he drunk?

Spike took another swig and stared blearily up at the stone ceiling. Yep, he was drunk all right. Besides the periods in which he lay completely passed out, saturated in alcohol, he hadn't drawn a breath without accompanying it by the swilling of beer bought with money from his extensive poker session a week previously. No kittens this time. Just stone cold cash, that was making him stone… cold…

Drunk… time after time after time…

He giggled insanely. It was such a good joke. Of course he was good at making jokes, at making people laugh at him. That was his job, wasn't it? To make people laugh at him. Laugh at the excuse of a Big Bad he'd become. Laugh at the excuse of a vampire that he'd become. To laugh at William the Bloody, to laugh at the Awful Poet tacked on to the end of that name, at the Slayer of Slayers sunk so low to laugh… to laugh… laugh… laugh…

Yep, he was definitely drunk.

Not that he minded, of course. His vision swirled around hazily as he giggled again, before gulping down another mouthful of the liquid that he couldn't taste properly any more. Maybe he should…

He passed out again for the third time, effectively cutting off his thought process.

8 8 8

"Willow… pass me that book."

Willow tiredly handed him another text, watching Giles grasp it eagerly and begin flipping through pages, as fresh as he'd been three hours ago. Tara noticed her lover's exhaustion and quietly squeezed her hand. Willow smiled back gratefully, keeping their hands intertwined as she studied the pages in front of her.

'The Icari then came upon the land in great numbers, ravaging the vampyres and humans alike. Their lesser brethren cried out to them in entreaty, begging them for mercy, offering themselves as servants to the Icari. But the Icari laughed mercilessly and slaughtered all who came in sight, only keeping in reserve those youthful enough for life to be drained out of them, in particular, those with supernatural powers of the Icari's ilk that they could feed upon. Allying themselves with the Silent Death, they swept over the land in search for the emerald jewel.'

"Any luck?" Tara whispered.

"I'm not sure," Willow shook her head and frowned slightly. "It sounds almost like a fairytale. You know, the strange and obscure references all of Giles' books have to make, or else they're not Giles' books."

Giles ignored most of the last part. "Obscure references? To what?"

"Look at it," Willow pushed the book towards him. "All 'Icari' and 'Silent Death' and… and… 'emerald jewel'. What's that supposed to mean? They could be anything."

"W-wouldn't the emerald jewel j-just mean the… emerald jewel?" Tara asked. "I mean… what else could it be?"

"You know these things," Willow laughed exasperatedly. "The 'emerald jewel' could turn out to be… um… something not emerald or even remotely jewel-ly."

"Icari…" Giles mumbled, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose. "I don't know why, but that sounds familiar."

'The search lasted for 14 years; 14 years of terror and massacre. Eventually, the Icari began capturing instead of merely slaughtering and built a colony that spanned many leagues, the land that they had pillaged and subjugated, along with those made slaves. The colony ended at a deep, near impassable ravine that had a barrier they could not cross, for the West people's powers were strong, and their fear tempered by defiance kept them vigilant. Even the Silent Death could not cross, and it was said that wintry blackness, a silence and a scream worse than hell spread from it to encase the land for many days at its failed attempt. Many Icari tried to cross, certain that the Emerald Jewel lay within the depths of the other land, and many lives lost and wasted by the frustrated Icari sending their slaves across the chasm along with their cruelty.

It was an impasse, but the West people could not stand by and watch others die. For many days the Council deliberated, before finally deciding to take a risk that could have destroyed all. At dawn, they called upon the power of the Emerald Jewel with Sheratan's voice and offered it the sacrifice of Starlight. The Icari were overcome by a wave of light, and the Silent Death humbled and diminished, and then cast into the Chasm. And the people rejoiced.'

They looked up at each other silently.

"But what does this have to do with what's happening?" Willow asked.

Giles looked grim.

"We'll have to see. But sometimes, I fear, the old legends are not only legends. And the enemies vanquished may only be sleeping."

8 8 8

The door banged.

"Spike! Up! Now!"

"Oh, I'm up, love…" Spike slurred drunkenly.

"Since when was still being in bed 'up'?" Buffy demanded, before understanding dawned and she scrunched her nose up. "God, you're a pig, Spike."

"I'm the Big Bad, darlin'" he drawled. "And don't you know it."

Buffy rolled her eyes. "I don't have time for this, Spike. I need you to do something for me."

"Since when did you ask me, Slayer?" Spike suddenly looked a lot less drunk, and Buffy unconsciously took a step back at the change as he sat up in bed and looked straight at her. He took in her surprised look and laughed. "Don't be so shocked, sweetheart. I can hold my drink. How many times have you bloody well driven me to it?"

She took three quick steps and hit him. Hard. In her favourite place.

"Bloody hell!" he swore as he fell backwards onto the bed, dripping blood. "Could you try to speak _without_ your fists for once?"

"I don't have time for this, Spike!" Buffy repeated again, this time her eyes flashing with suppressed anger. "Mum's in hospital, I can't contact Giles, Riley's disappeared, and Willow, Tara, Xander, and Anya aren't answering the phone! And Dawn, Cassandra and Daniel have been alone in Giles' apartment for the entire night since they've gotten back from school!"

Spike leapt off the bed, fangs bared before she'd even completed her first sentence, and was out the door by her last. She stood shocked as she heard the stream of curses that trailed behind him.

The conscious thoughts that trailed through his mind.

_Joyce… The Juniors…_

The thoughts that he was pushing away now rather effectively back behind the still slightly inebriated curtain.

_She hurts me. She still doesn't trust me, after all I've done, all I've proven. Time after time after…_

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

Blood.

Was that it?

He wondered as he felt the mesmerizing rhythm of it along his veins. Remembered that day, pounding into the wall, watching it flow over his callused skin, his split knuckles decorated with a liquid that he once thought was just red and white blood cells in plasma, carrying vital nutrients and chemicals from one place to another. Later, as his knowledge of anatomy grew, the names grew more complicated, and he learnt more of the functions, along with the role blood sometimes played in the fascinating brain chemistry he studied. But he was only just beginning to glimpse at it. It was more, so much more than just cells… so much more than just the carrier of nutrients and chemicals… so… much…

"Harder…"

The words slipped out from his mouth like a crimson wave, falling from his lips to shudder over his body and crest through the air to finally lap gently against the vampiress' ear. She didn't need to be told twice. Eagerly, she sucked deeper, and the responding groan that boiled up from his depths more than rewarded her for her troubles; even if she was just looking for the sweet blood she fed on, it was nice to be appreciated for what only she and her kind could give him.

He moaned as she dug into him, feeling the cool ivory of her fangs, her skin, gliding through and over him like death, calming and exciting his body at the same time to greater depths and soaring heights of ecstasy and pain… and that feeling. The reason he came back, time after time after time… why he'd been coming here for two fortnights already, like a moth drawn to flame. Why he'd lingered, time after time in this cesspool of corruption that was draining him dry yet feeding him back a terrible life filled with a new understanding. How it felt to be needed. And with that understanding, the new one that had been nagging silently at him for far too long, undermining his security and quietly weakening his conviction. Of what it felt like to be _not_ needed. To be, he thought bitterly, almost _beneath_ someone, instead of equal or above. Equality. To be _needed_. Dependence and independence. That fine balance that everyone _needed_ deep inside; to feel safe, to feel complete.

To feel love.

Even as the vampiress' hands began roving lower and lower and the blood pulled through his system like a tide, a single tear threatened to escape. He felt a surge of pleasure overwhelm his body and he groaned at the increasing intensity of it, but inside his heart still quaked breathlessly in his body.

_I love her. She doesn't love me. And she won't ever love me. She doesn't need me. She doesn't love me…_

Words that had repeated themselves in his head. Time after time after time.

8 8 8


	37. Beginning of the End

**Chapter 35: Beginning of the End**

**Disclaimer: No ownership. I'm just perpetually on my knees before the altar of Jossverse. :P.**

**Rating: I think I'm boring everyone to death repeating the same thing each time. See the first fourteen chapters if you haven't, yet :)**

**Summary: This is the summary of the last couple of chapters and anything important I thought needed to be added. :D.**

**AU from the ending of Season 4. Riley and Buffy have 'made up', while Spike has finally realized his true feelings for Buffy. Daniel, Cassandra, and Dawn, have also uncovered and old poem that may or may not be a prophecy. And, as all prophecies are wont to be, it's cryptic and doesn't make sense :P. Riley has also been going to the vamps for a while to get bitten.**

**A/N (No reviews. :(. Oh well, I guess a lot of you are on holiday at the moment, hey? Make it up to me? Pleaseprettyplease:D. It's really nice to get a review after slugging hard against writer's block. . . /whine :P**

**Okay, now onto our cough regularly cough scheduled chapter! I hope you enjoy. : )**

8 8 8

"Mummy?"

"Dawnie…" she gave me a weary smile as I stepped into the room. "What are you doing here?"

I glanced around nervously. "Well… uh… I just didn't feel…"

I paused. Stopped. Couldn't decide whether to blush or retreat into myself. Finally, the words came.

"It's Buffy and Riley. I… just don't feel like they want me there at the moment, you know?"

"Do you mean that you walked here all by yourself in the dark?" she asked disbelievingly.

"I got a lift from Xander and Anya," I admitted, repressing the memories that would no doubt scar me for the rest of my teenage life about their chosen conversation topic. "They didn't want to come in and tire you, though."

"That's very sweet," Mum laughed. "But I would have been fine."

I slowly padded closer. They were right not to have come, I thought. I doubt Mum was really in the mood to cope with too many people at the moment. She looked so tired… the hospital bed sagged around her, frighteningly white, yet still somehow causing the conflict of colours to somehow wash out all of the remaining life from Mum's face. I looked desperately for it. Traced the skin with my fingers. Cursed silently inside as I felt a tear slide down my own cheek.

"Oh, Dawnie… don't cry."

I felt her fingers as they gently wiped away that single tear, and the mere touch sent a flood of memories into my mind at all of the times she'd done that. How that simple touch could make everything well again, even if the boy I'd had a crush on found someone else, or the scratches on my knee were stinging like anything. This time, though, it just made things worse. I had to fight to keep myself from what I wanted to do most; collapsing and crying out my worries in her arms.

"It's going to be okay, you'll see," Mum comforted. "Look, the doctors said that it could have been anything. Overwork… too much stress…"

Overwork… stress… my mind whirled. I know it sounded selfish… and I know I'd seen her stressed so many times. That slightly pinched look of worry that came to her face when time was short or the shopping trolley refused to roll straight and there was a big dinner up ahead was as familiar to me as Buffy getting on my nerves. But it always faded. I remember thinking Mum was some kind of super woman… it would affect her, but she'd fight it off and live another day happy and smiling. I couldn't ever believe how she could cope with Buffy and me and the Gallery and the housework when I had trouble coping with the cruelty from some of the people at school.

I guess she could feel the despair radiating off me. Mum always could. She laughed softly. "God knows I get enough stress and work from looking after you two," she teased. "Maybe that's why."

Well… um… that just made things worse.

"I'm just joking," she chuckled, tightening her grip around me. She must have felt the sudden tension in my arms. What if that were it? Mum was finally cracking under the pressure of having a Slayer for her eldest daughter and a teenager for her youngest.

That meant that her collapsing could be my fault

My fault.

_My_ fault.

I buried my head further into the hospital gown. The smells of Hospitals in general wafted through my nostrils and I wanted to vomit. Where was the smell of Mum in here? The smell and the touch that made everything better…

They were missing.

I tried to search past the disinfectant, past the thin cotton, smells so sharp and clean they burnt my senses. Searched until...

There. A whiff of the Mum I knew.

Mum cooking.

Mum cleaning.

Mum smiling.

Mum laughing.

Mum hugging us.

Mum going off to work.

_Home_.

I couldn't help but let the tears leak a little more.

8 8 8

How could he leave her? Spike wondered as he followed (inconspicuously) behind. How could he leave her, seconds, minutes, hours after feeling her in his arms, touching that skin, revelling in her heat. After running his fingers through her golden tresses, touching that soft, soft body, yet feeling the Slayer muscles tense beneath. How could he…?

Wait.

Why was he so bothered about that fact?

So bothered about the fact that the man in front of him could do that. Could reach out and touch her.

And had.

Right in front of him.

When he didn't deserve her.

Not that he deserved her himself… but…

He growled as he thought of the look on her face when she'd found out his infidelity. His betrayal.

_Bloody blighter didn't know it wasn't her. How could he bloody well not know?_

_You didn't know until she kissed you,_ a voice whispered in his ear. _And you had all of your supernatural vampire powers as well. He's just a human._

_Shut up,_ he snarked back.

Still muttering under his breath and lost inside his reverie of his relatively new realization, he almost failed to take into account the importance of the environment the person he was following had walked straight into, as if he'd been there before.

Been there before quite a few times.

He _almost_ failed to take it into account.

_What the hell is he doing here? Downtown Sunnydale? Going into…_

He paused to sniff the air. He remembered this place from his traversing and exploring. Getting to know the place that would become his home. A place where he'd settled down for longer than he had for a long time. A place that would forever hold memories he wouldn't be able to forget. Like when he had investigated this place, following another person here. Okay, fine. Not a person. Another vampire, looking to become an employee. A vampire who'd formerly been his minion before everything was shot to hell. A vampire who'd escaped the hell that Angelus had brought, somehow resisted all vampiric bonds and broken many vampiric laws to abandon his 'crippled' master and had found employment. Something that Spike had followed up two years later, almost noting with wonder and disgust that he had managed to stay alive… or undead.

And upon meeting him again, had promptly rectified that fact.

_Going into what could constitute as a vampire-human whorehouse. After he's spent half the night with her lying in his arms… touching her…_

Somehow, his thoughts always returned to her. Cursing and muttering, he attempted to push them away violently, but found he couldn't.

_How could he? _Something inside him seethed. _This is the first night she's let herself rest for a second. This is the first night she's gone home instead of staying over at the hospital. This is the first night she's allowed him to touch her like that, and he leaves her._

He unobtrusively entered the pool of electric light that the door that lay somewhat ajar allowed. He drank in the smells and sounds that awaited him. Suckling and slurping, moans and grunts, cries that petered away as they were muffled, some forcefully. And above all, the rhythmic sound of blood and heartbeats being drawn into a being darker than the humans might have realized. And the smell of blood and other bodily fluids.

It was intoxicating, but he shook it off and followed Finn's scent like a hound, tracing him up the stairs.

When he saw all there was to be seen, he walked down, and out into the night.

8 8 8

I don't know why I woke up. The past few days had been so hectic… looking after mum… making sure everything was alright… waiting anxiously for the CAT scan results…

Then Riley, and him looking after me. Most importantly, I guess, was allowing him to look after me. That had felt nice, except that I could tell there was still some tension in the air remaining after the last few days. His annoyance over Spike coming to see Mum several times and even waiting overnight once seemed to dissipate slightly, though, when he offered to patrol so I could have a night off. I was still surprised about that. Surprised about the flowers and the get-well card, happily decorated with a picture of a smiling cartoon vamp. Surprised about him running to Giles' apartment that day she'd asked him for help, and staying with the three kids that she used to be afraid he'd eat. Protecting them, even. Surprised about him bringing chocolates. Surprised about Dawn falling asleep in his lap. Surprised about the way he let her…

Surprised, shocked, and a little irritated to find him standing in my doorway.

"Spike? What the hell are you doing here?"

I woke up a bit more.

"What the hell are you doing _here!_ And…"

I suddenly realized the emptiness of my bed. And the coldness, as well.

"Where's… where's Riley?"

His glacier eyes shot into me, and I pulled the sheet closer to myself. There was something in those eyes that I couldn't even begin to understand.

"Get dressed, Slayer," he said softly. "I want to show you something."

I opened my mouth to argue, and then shut it. There was a cold glint to his demeanour… and the seriousness that dripped from his tone immediately erased all thoughts of me snarking.

I waited.

"Hurry up, Slayer. There's no time for you to stare at me with those gorgeo… gorgon eyes of yours. We need to move if we're gonna get there in time."

I kept waiting. He got the point a second later.

"Oh please," he snorted. "Like I bloody give a damn."

I reached for my clothes, eying him carefully… did he almost crane his neck around there?

And why did that thought make me want to blush instead of making me want to go Cave-slayer and kill him?

And…

Okay, I wasn't even going to go down _that_ train of thought.

I dressed quickly, and hopped out of bed. He didn't turn around once, didn't even look back to check when I was ready. He simply held open the door for me, and fell into step behind me as we descended the stairs and walked into the night. The cold air misted around me as we traversed the streets of Sunnydale, going into the seedier parts of town that I never usually patrolled around. My Slayer instincts went on alert.

"Spike… where the hell are you taking me?"

He paused. Stopped. I walked on a few more steps before I realized, and then turned to face him. His face was half shadowed by the nearby building, but the moon lit up his angular face, dancing over his cheekbones like…

I cleared my throat and shook uncomfortably. "Spike?"

He looked down, and then leaned against the wall. For a few seconds, I thought he was going to turn away, before he began talking.

"I thought… I thought I should show you. But…"

"Show me what, dammit?" I was getting impatient. No-one seemed to be able to give me a straight answer these days. Plus, everything had to be so _confusing_. And everything confusing always led back to him, and why he was acting like this without a soul. Why couldn't An…

I terminated that thought. Killed it. Slayed it.

He raised his eyes then, to search my soul. Those bright, blue, sharp eyes that could cut away everything and leave just you, standing there, illuminated in moonlight and shadows.

"I was going to show you," he murmured. "I was going to show you what Soldier Boy's been doing. But… it'll hurt you."

Fire flared in my eyes. It was instinctive. I couldn't help it. Suddenly, he was no longer leaning against the wall. He was pushed against it. I barely realized _I_ was the one doing that, until my voice grated out, cold and angry.

_Is that really what I sound like?_ I thought.

"What about Riley!"

"Dammit, Slayer!" the look in his eyes turned icy. "Every bloody time I try to help you, you reward me with this!" he shoved my hands off him and stepped away from my hold. I took a few steps back as he slowly began advancing on me, his eyes burning like the sea.

"How long have I helped you for, now? How many times have you seen inside my mind? How many times have you _all_ seen my soddin', pathetic existence for what it bloody well was! How many times have you dug away at all of the bloody mindblocks I put up to stop it all from soddin' coming through again, and have _you_ lot rip them down! I'm sick of it, Slayer! Through all of that… you don't even give me one… bit… of trust!" he snapped his fingers each time, accentuating the words, punching them sharply into the air inches away from my face.

I looked again, and saw something swirling in those depths.

_Hurt?_

_No… _one part of my mind whispered. _He's a soulless, evil, vampire. He can't hurt. He's nothing._

_You idiot… _the other part yelled. _Has he really been acting like that? Acting like a soulless, evil, vampire? Acting like he's nothing?_

_That's all it is. Acting. He's trying to…_

_He's stopped asking for money. And you can see it. You look into those gorgeous eyes of him. Spike wears his heart on his sleeve. Any ulterior motives… just like that night when you made the truce. Honesty. That was all you could see in those eyes. Honesty and pain. What do you see in them now?_

_No… no. He's a soulless…_

_You see honesty…_

His voice snapped her out of her inner tirade. He'd unconsciously let some of the hurt seep into his tones, and it made her heart ache.

"I mean, I'm not a dog, you know. You can't just kick me down so many times and expect me to leap back up and wag my bloody tail and dance to your tune! I'm a…"

He stopped.

"What are you, Spike?" I asked, softly, before cursing that question as it left my lips. I didn't want to hear the answer.

I was too afraid.

He faltered, for a second, before raising his eyes again to meet mine, flaming.

"I'm a man," he ground out. "An' a demon."

Out of my surprise, I heard myself answering.

"How can you be both?"

He spun around, his duster swirling, to face into the darkness of the street where I couldn't see him. When he spoke, bitterness dripped from his voice.

"Trust me, Slayer. When I figure it out, you'll be the third to know."


	38. Chipped Angels

**Chapter 36: Chipped Angels**

**Disclaimer: No ownership. I'm just perpetually on my knees before the altar of Jossverse. :P.**

**Rating: I think I'm boring everyone to death repeating the same thing each time. See the first fourteen chapters if you haven't, yet :)**

**Summary: This is the summary of the last couple of chapters and anything important I thought needed to be added. :D.**

**AU from the ending of Season 4. Riley and Buffy have 'made up', while Spike has finally realized his true feelings for Buffy. Daniel, Cassandra, and Dawn, have also uncovered and old poem that may or may not be a prophecy. And, as all prophecies are wont to be, it's cryptic and doesn't make sense :P. Riley has also been going to the vamps for a while to get bitten. Spike has discovered, and has led Buffy to him.**

**A/N (Goddess! Thank you so much to everyone! hugs! Thank-you to Kim, who's commented almost every single chapter since she found this fic. I know what you mean about stuffing up with the reviews. Thanks anyway! You're right. It is hard to deal with illness and death, especially if you've been sheltered like Dawn. I agree with your view of vampires as well. I believe all sentient beings can feel as well. My view on souls will probably be coming later, though :P.**

**Thank-you too, to Dieu Anonyme! It's been a while since I've seen you around, my friend : ). Good to see you. (laughs). I don't blame you for hating Riley :P. His downfall's coming, though. :P. Hope you enjoy. **

**You're right. I mainly put that section in because I wanted the reader to feel pity for him. I've always kinda felt sorry for him, to tell the truth. And yes, Spike has finally seen the light :P. Don't worry, he won't be turned into schoolboy-crush-having-vampire. Although being kinda cute is part of his character sometimes, I partially disagreed with the show in that sense as well. I'm glad you've been enjoying this so far. Thanks for reviewing!**

**And thanks to Charity for your two reviews:P Your enthusiastic cheering on is really helping! Thanks to all of you who reviewed, I've managed to write a full chapter in 2 days, and thus this one can be released now. : D. **

**I apologize for going on and on about the reviews and not getting to the chapter, but really, guys, I just want to tell you all how much I appreciate it! It's the only reason I was able to get out a chapter so quickly! My thanks again at coming back and finding 4 review alerts in my inbox. It really finally killed my writer's block for good with this fic, I think:D. So now, without further ado, onto the chapter! Hope you enjoy :) )**

8 8 8

Cassandra pushed the tree slightly. It sagged.

"I still think it doesn't have enough support, guys."

"Perfectionist," Daniel shot back. "It could be completely straight, with all the branches in the right position, every globe and pattern of the decorations matched symmetrically on each side, and the star shining and flawless, and you'd still find something wrong."

"But the fact is," Dawn chuckled. "It's _not_ completely straight, I think the branches are lopsided, and the decorations are pretty much staggered. And the star's kinda bent."

"Hey," Daniel protested. "You're not helping!"

"I know," Dawn smirked.

"No fair," he sulked. "I have two beautiful girls ganging up on me."

Cassandra blushed. Dawn chuckled. "You've been hanging around Xander way too much, Daniel."

"No," Cassandra snorted. "He's just a guy."

They laughed and whacked each other, while Tara watched the entire exchange with a soft, amused smile as she teetered on her toes in an effort to hang up a homemade ornament with the words 'Buffy and Dawn: To Mum' inscribed shakily in childish writing on the back.

"I d-don't see any reason to disagree with him."

"Neither do I," Willow grinned happily. "You're all fine, upstanding young people of the upcoming generation, proudly soldiering forth in pursuit of… uh…"

"Presents?" Daniel asked, almost bouncing on his toes. At the look from the others, he stopped. "What? The tree will look better once it has the presents under it."

Dawn smiled. "And we'll arrange it just like Mum…"

She paused.

Cassandra reached over and was about to pat her shoulder, but Dawn regained her composure in less than a second. "Just like Mum's done it for the couple of years. When she comes home tomorrow, everything'll be okay."

Willow and Tara looked at each other silently as the scene unfolded in front of them.

The hand reaching up to grab a painted clay angel from the mantelpiece and move it across accidentally skimmed it instead, and it fell. Cursing, Dawn swooped down and inspected it closely.

"It's not broken…" she sighed with relief.

"Just a chip off the wing," Daniel reached down and picked it up, giving her the tiny piece of white and gold painted clay. "We can stick it back on. Superglue solves everything."

Cass snorted. "Except your insufferable ability to be so cheerful."

"You say that like it's a bad thing," he joked, before their shared banter was cut off by the look on Dawn's face.

"Dawn?"

She snapped out of it, and put a strained smile on her face. "Well… uh… we could always glue his lips together."

Cass shook her head, pushing away the concern with a light rejoinder. "He'd still be able to smile. And follow us around. And smile some more."

Daniel waved. "Hello? Standing right here."

They continued on oblivious.

"Maybe. But at least the optimistic comments wouldn't be hitting us left, right, and centre."

"Someone has to be optimistic among you two," Daniel snorted. "I mean, look at you. The Doom and Gloom sisters. Maybe Buffy can slay your pessimism?"

"Ha-de-ha-ha," Dawn muttered, before carefully poking some of the ornaments. "Are we done yet, then?"

"I'd say we are," Willow finally, guardedly, broke in at that, switching off the living room lights. Before, as she and Tara had watched, the three of them had seemed almost in their own world, bantering, comforting, snarking. It reminded her briefly of high school days. Watching the interaction with the new eyes and subtle appreciations magic and being around Tara had given her was incredible.

"I think the place looks quite nice now," Tara nodded.

"Well…" Cassandra opened her mouth.

"Don't," Daniel warned. "Don't you dare."

She shut her mouth and proceeded to take in the view again.

The Summers' living room was lightly glowing in the darkness, a combined effort of the moonlight streaming in from the open curtains and the Christmas lights that dotted the tree. A line of Angels decorated the mantelpiece, staggered with layered, unlit candles, complementing the brightly coloured stockings that hung underneath. All that was missing was the fire in the brazier, the presents under the tree…

_And Mum and Buffy,_ Dawn thought silently to herself.

8 8 8

Riley.

_Riley_.

**Riley**.

He'd warned me. Spike. He'd warned me. "You don't have to see this if you don't want to, Slayer," he'd said, outside that derelict, broken down building, where my Slayer senses went haywire at the blood and the vampires inside. "I can…" he'd faltered. "I can tell you. I just don't think you'll believe me."

"If it was so important you needed to wake me up, then I might as well. Plus…" I'd taken a steadying breath. "I'm already here, anyway."

Beneath the calmness, I'd been churning like anything. Riley? What could Riley be doing here? Was this where he'd disappeared to that night when I needed him? How did Spike now? Why did Spike now? What was happening? Why was Spike… Oh, God, if Spike was leading me to Riley of his own free will, what could have happened? What would have happened? What did happen? Or did anything happen? Was Spike just bored and…?

No. Not with the intensity of everything he was feeling glowing out of his eyes and spilling out of his heart like that.

And then, I'd seen it.

_You don't have to see this if you don't want to, Slayer. I can… I can tell you. I just don't think you'll believe me._

_How can I believe this!_

My mind screamed. My heart shuddered.

Betrayed.

Again.

Names, memories, flooded. This wasn't…

_Father. Daddy. Hank._

_Laughter. Happiness. Screaming. Fights. Sobbing. Tears. Gone. Phone. Letters. Secretary. Spain._

_A cheque every month. Nothing else._

_Angel. Angelus. Words. Bile. Hate. Pain. Blood. Fear._

_Fear/Love._

_Parker. Escape from Angel. Telling myself I'd gotten over him._

_It wasn't about Angel?_

_It was all about Angel._

_Cast. Aside. Like nothing._

_Now… now…_

_Riley. Trust. Not love… if it were love, would I go insane? Insane with this pain… pain…_

_Trust. Human. Good. Demon-Hunter. Demon-Hunter with the Slayer. Match made in Heaven. Right?_

… _right?_

_Normal. Honest. Trustworthy._

_Convenient._

_Oh God, oh God, oh God, oh God, oh God, oh God…_

"Slayer…"

I looked up. To this day, I don't know what was in my eyes. But he flinched.

"Buffy," his voice became softer. "I… I thought you should know, love."

_So easy. It would be so easy, to put the blame on him. Move your legs. Move your arms. Pound him into a pulp and leave him to the sunrise, pour all of your anger and fear and pain, pain, pain into him. _

_No._

_What do you mean no? Or just… glare. Glare and walk away, and beat him up later when you can think. Make him feel like it's his fault._

_No._

_Why! He's just a soulless…_

_Don't start that. Not now._

_But…_

_Shut… up. He helped me, tonight. What if Riley had gotten turned, and Dawn or Mum invited him in? What if he met Xander, Willow, Anya, Giles, Cassandra, or Daniel on the street?_

_But…_

_No._

The arguing inside my head was making me dizzy. Or that could have been the fresh load of memories and the aching that they brought.

"Thanks, Spike," it rasped out dryly from my throat. He studied it, his face concerned, but otherwise emotionless, like he was hiding something, perhaps. Or doing that scanny thing where he could look inside you and pull out all the feelings you'd always thought were hidden.

What came out of his mouth, though, still surprised me.

"Is there something I can do?"

I shook my head through the daze of everything. "I just want to go home."

He walked me home. I didn't question it. I wanted… I didn't know what I wanted. To scream. To shout. To cry. To glare. To cry. To rage. To slay. To cry. To slay. To slay. To run. Just to run away from it all. I don't know how I even walked properly. To this day, I'm not sure if at some point he caught me as I almost keeled over and let me lean on him. I think that perhaps he would have carried me if I'd have let it. To have so many feelings rending at my insides; fear, anger, loneliness, hate, love, betrayal, pain, sadness, it seemed so hard to contain. Feelings leaking everywhere, lashing out and attaching to different people. To myself.

After a while, through blurred eyes… from a sudden exhaustion that had overtaken me not in any way related to tears, I saw our Christmas lights.

A broken laugh bubbled out of my lips.

"Merry bloody Christmas, Buffy Summers," I choked. "Merry bloody Christmas."

"Oh, love…"

I turned around and found myself in his arms. As I stood, and I sobbed, and he hugged me in my front garden, I didn't care that the neighbours could probably see me, that I was standing out in the open hugging William the Bloody. All I cared about were the arms encircling me, holding me tight against a hard, yet strangely comforting chest. I breathed as I wept, breathed in the scent of leather and cigarettes and Spike. And I didn't question why that made me feel better.


	39. Heart in Hands

**Chapter 37: Heart in Hands**

**Disclaimer: Don't hurt me :P. I'm just playing with Joss' world. It's not mine :P. If it was, d'you think I'd have let Season 7 Buffy and Season 5 Angel end like that:P**

**Rating: I think I'm boring everyone to death repeating the same thing each time. See the first fourteen chapters if you haven't, yet :)**

**Summary: This is the summary of the last couple of chapters and anything important I thought needed to be added. :D.**

**AU from the ending of Season 4. Riley and Buffy have 'made up', while Spike has finally realized his true feelings for Buffy. Daniel, Cassandra, and Dawn, have also uncovered and old poem that may or may not be a prophecy. And, as all prophecies are wont to be, it's cryptic and doesn't make sense :P. Joyce has also been admitted to hospital for a fainting spell that she's had. Riley has also been going to the vamps for a while to get bitten. Spike has discovered, and has led Buffy to him. When she sees Riley, she lets Spike comfort her.**

**A/N (Goddess! Thank you so much to everyone again! hugs! Four reviews for one chapter again! Thanks for your review, Kim. : ). Yes, Dawn's still trying to soldier on with Christmas. Of course, as Christmas has passed this year and I was too late to get out the chapter on time, there won't be too much more of a mention on Christmas. And Spike was really good to Buffy here. This Spike has had to deal with a few more emotional issues and has gotten a bit more support, so he approached it more gently in this universe, with less gloating at Riley because Buffy is more important to him. **

**Thank you, Dieu Anonyme! Yes, I just couldn't send Riley off when he'd cheated with Faith. Not without ending the rest of his spiral. He actually does see her when she sees him, but that gets elaborated on in this chapter. : ) **

**Heh, thanks Charity. : ). I hope I've managed to portray Buffy the way I want to. I'm glad you like what I've done. More insights into Buffy coming along. : ).**

**And thanks to KelleyTheSelfToastablePopTart. :P. Interesting name, btw :P. I'm glad you like it. : )**

**I apologize for going on and on about the reviews _again_ and not getting to the chapter, but really, guys, I just want to tell you all how much I appreciate it again! It's the only reason I can keep getting chapters out so quickly. : ) My thanks again for coming back and finding 4 review alerts in my inbox. :D. So now, without further ado, onto the chapter! Hope you enjoy :) )**

8 8 8

The door slammed open.

"What took you?" I calmly re-corked the bottle and set it aside on the table. "I expected you around three hours ago."

Captain Cardboard didn't answer to the taunt. Instead, he stormed over just as I began to get up and grabbed my shirt and pulled me bodily upwards. With a growl, I wrenched myself free, taking care not to injure G.I Joe even though my brain screamed for me to rip him apart or slowly torture him to death.

I cursed my chip for the umpteenth time as I began to back away steadily. He followed, and I could see the pain and the rage and the impotent fury stamped all over his Iowan-bred-and-born face.

I would have been fine. If I hadn't backed into the pillar.

"Look, I'm not the one who got you into this, pillock," I snarled softly as he moved closer, trying to buy myself some time. "Don't kill the messenger."

"Why the hell not?" he demanded, pulling his arm back.

I saw the stake.

I felt the stake.

How do I describe getting staked?

My unbeating heart jumped. My body convulsed around the bloody thing. I'd always thought I'd go out fighting… fighting the Slayer in my dreams or a horde of demons. Exploding the bloody world and laughin' at my mistake. Takin' down everyone who tried to get me… protectin' the people that mattered. Something _grand_. I wasn't going to go out without a fight, that was for soddin' sure. But at the hands of a G.I Joe barely off his mother's milk? That probably hurt the most…

"OW! Bloody hell! Oh… god! Hey…"

_What the… why aren't I dust?_

He yanked it out of me, and I reflexively grabbed my chest in pain as blood dribbled out.

"Plastic wood-grain. Looks real, doesn't it?" Whitebread smirked. "Don't think I don't know what's goin' on with you, Spike. Stay away from her. Or we'll do this for real next time."

He let go of me, then, and started walking away. Even through the burning agony of the hole in my chest, piercing my heart, I started to laugh. It bubbled out of my lungs, my throat, rasping in the air as I laughed my bloody head off. I couldn't soddin' believe it.

He turned back and glared at me.

"Oh, man," I chuckled. "You are really under it, aren't you?"

"What?" he asked angrily.

"Look at you," I gestured, laughing again. "All afraid I'm hot for your honey."

He walked back towards me. "Because you are."

"Well ... yeah," I admitted, still weakly laughing. "But that's not your problem. Even if I wasn't in the picture, you're never gonna be able to hold onto her."

He shoved the hand over my chest and the hole inside spasmed in a fresh burst of agony. "Ow!" I yelped. "Bloody hell!"

"Maybe I didn't almost kill you enough," he muttered darkly.

"Oh come on, you stupid pillock," I groaned. "You're not the long haul guy and you know it."

"Shut up."

Was the entire bloody world in denial?

"You know it," I forced out. "Or else you wouldn't be getting suck jobs from two-bit vampire trulls. Plus, you would have run after her when you saw."

He let go of me, and I staggered to the chair and collapsed. _Bloody pillock. _I saw him swallow, his Adam's Apple bobbing up and down, making me wish I could tear off his head and drink.

"I tried."

"Lemme guess," I smirked. "She'd drained too much of you for you to get too far? Or were you just too busy?"

He swallowed again and didn't answer. I decided to twist the knife a little more.

"That's my answer, then. But the girl doesn't just need a guy who'd run after her, the girl needs some monster in her man ... and that's not in your nature," I sneered, then deliberately looked down at my chest and back to his eyes. "No matter how low you try to go."

He had the grace to look slightly ashamed beneath his stony faced exterior. Then again, that wasn't saying much.

I shakily grabbed the bottle I'd left unattended and uncorked it. Taking a swig, I felt the liquor burn its way down my throat. "You made her cry, you know."

"Did I?" he laughed bitterly. "And that's supposed to mean something?"

Something hardened in my heart. With a hole in it. And lots of blood still seeping out. When Whitebread had gone, I'd need to bandage it. "Of course it bloody well does. I'm sure it was the best Christmas present you ever gave to her."

"I didn't get her a Christmas present," he mumbled.

"Well then, m' point's proved," I snorted, shaking my head.

"You don't understand, do you?" he demanded angrily, pacing around the floor of my crypt. "You just don't understand. It was all about her. Her and her fascination with vampires. All I did was find out _why_. Why she felt like that."

"No you didn't," I disagreed bluntly. "You went and got yourself suck-jobs. She's the Slayer. We vampires… it's a bloody dance it is, through the centuries. You and your two-bit trulls have nothing on that. You still haven't got a clue what's between us."

"You stay away from her, Spike," he glared at me, the truth in my words hitting him hard. "You touch her, and I'll kill you."

"I'd a' killed you a long time ago if it wasn't for this chip you shoved in my cranium," I shot back. "Ain't love bloody grand?"

Hatred flamed in his eyes. "I don't know why the hell she trusts you," he threw bitterly at me. "You're nothing but a demon."

"And you're nothing but a man who cheated on her only the soddin' Devil knows how many times," I threw back. "Makes you no better than me."

"Don't preach to me," he hissed. "You're soulless."

"An' that's supposed to mean something?" I laughed harshly. "You stupid idiots. What I know of a soul you couldn't even begin to comprehend."

"You're a soulless demon," he snapped.

I stood, holding my heart in my hand, looking down at him. He'd collapsed into a chair awhile ago, tired by the incessant pacing and his already stretched nerves. I could smell the blood on him. Could smell the bites. Could smell her, mingled with all the other females' scents. She rose above them like a bloody goddess.

"I'm a hundred-plus years older than you, _Riley_," I used his name for the first time, and I saw his eyes dilate in confusion and shock as I switched to gameface. "Remember that the next time you think of tangling with me, _boy_."

He sneered, attempting to bluff his way out of the scent of fear that had suddenly surrounded him. "Well," he pointed at my chest. "Looks like _I_ have a lot to fear."

I growled. "The only reason I haven't gotten you killed yet is because she happens to be crazy enough at the moment to care about you. Although with what you've done, 'm guessing I won't have to worry about that soon."

He couldn't say anything to that.

When he left, the crypt door slamming subduedly shut behind him, I finally collapsed properly and let the wound in my heart bleed.

8 8 8

"Are you certain?"

"Yes."

The middle-aged man narrowed his eyes, his mind jumping from fact to fact as it began to build a picture in front of him of what they were investigating.

"This is highly unusual and most unorthodox," he mused.

She patted him on the shoulder affectionately. "What could you expect, papa? It's Buffy Summer's we're talking about. She's always been the most…"

"Unusual…"

"Unorthodox…"

"Unique Slayer," she smiled. "It's how she's been most effective."

"Indeed," he nodded. "So you're certain, then?"

"Yes," he repeated again, shifting the tea in his hand as he leaned back in his chair. "It was unquestionable. Just take a look at the graphs."

They carefully scanned the documents inside. "Well then, aside from the surges from the Hellmouth we have been monitoring and the surges of the enjoining spell Mr. Giles detailed, there have been three large ones, the largest dating back to the first surge of the enjoining spell?"

"It appears so," she furrowed her brow. "I'm not sure I like this, Papa. It seems like the Hellmouth has been rather crowded as of late. I'm not doubting her prowess, but might it be a little…?"

He followed her thoughts, nodded, and smiled. "Yes, I do believe it is time."

8 8 8

I pushed the crypt door open. "Spike?"

He didn't appear to be there. I frowned slightly and wondered why I was disappointed.

_Don't be stupid, girl. Of course you're disappointed. He's the only one you can talk to at the moment…_

_The only one who'll understand._

"OW! Bloody, soddin' hell!"

Okay, he was here.

I followed his voice and moved to the trapdoor, lifting it easily and climbing slowly down the ladder. When I'd lightly jumped to reach the bottom, I turned around, and I gasped.

He sat on the edge of his bed, bandages laid out next to him, minus his shirt. He was muttering curses as he tried to bandage himself.

First thought. _Oh God he has washboard abs._

Second thought. _What the hell is that big bloody (literally) hole doing in his chest!_

"Spike!" I gasped.

He spun around quickly towards my voice, and then grabbed his chest in pain. "OW! God, Slayer, don't scare a vamp like that!"

"What the hell happened to you!" I demanded, staring at that hole, my heart in my throat. He'd somehow managed to slow most of the bleeding a wound that size would give, but that just served to clear the view. I swallowed. The white of his ribs shone dully in the side, poking out from flesh…

_Oh my god. That's his heart._

Before he could reply, I was at his side, grabbing the bandage he'd been trying to futilely wind around his chest and fishing my first aid kit from my pocket. Well… not much of a first aid kit. Just a few bandages and some antiseptic towels. But hey, Slayer here.

"Hey now, Slayer, what are you…"

"Shut up and stop moving your chest," I gritted my teeth as I carefully extricated an antiseptic towel and dabbed slightly at the edge.

He howled in pain. "Dammit, woman! I'm a vampire, I don't get infected!"

"Don't care," I shot back as I staved off my worry and cleaned off the blood. My heart hammered in my chest. _Oh God, what could have done this to him?_

If there was a demon out there strong enough to take down Spike like this… I swallowed and examined the wound further. Why wasn't he dust yet?

When I was done, I discarded the antiseptic towels and brought out the padded bandages, peeled the backing off of one and pressing it gently to his chest to cover the wound. Then I took the wrapping bandages from his nerveless hands and covered it firmly, trying to ignore the slight intake of breath every time I pressed a little too hard.

"There," I breathed, securing it with a butterfly clip. I smiled shakily and looked up into his eyes.

His eyes…

Blue, so intense and passionate and furious with whirling emotion. I would have taken a step back before. Now, I just ducked my head.

"Now tell me which demon's ass we're going to have to kick together."

As I looked up at him again, I started. Just like that, his eyes had metamorphosed into glittering, hard, ice.

"Spike?" I tried.

He looked away from me then, and I felt bitterness fall around him like his leather duster. "Wasn't a demon. You think any demon would be able to do this to me?"

"Wasn't a…"

The implications of that pounded into me. Like a hammer and a big, pointy nail.

"Riley," I whispered.

"That obvious, huh?" he turned back towards me and I saw a sharp glint of hurt irradiating from his cerulean eyes. "This chip," he said softly. "I've been reduced to _this_."

The bottle of brandy I hadn't seen before shattered against the wall. I jumped, and he snarled angrily. "William the Bloody. Slayer of Slayers. Would have been killed by a mere mortal if the prick hadn't decided to use _plastic_ wood-grain just to laugh at me!"

The strength of his pain and anger overwhelmed me. So I did the only thing that leapt into my head

I reached out and connected.

8 8 8

_20 minutes later…_

Their eyes snapped open as she finally broke the link and stopped the stream of images and thoughts, and they faced each other, panting slightly from exertion.

He looked at her, awed.

She hid from the passion and the intensity of his feelings in that gaze.

"Cor, Slayer," he breathed as he felt gratitude and astonishment overwhelm him at her compassion and her vulnerability in opening herself to him. "I love you."

He regretted the words the instant they slipped out of his mouth. But it was too late. In the silence that followed, worlds hung on his mind and his heart, open to the world save for the bandages she'd so gently wrapped around it, leapt into his mouth.

He swallowed.

The silence stretched.

She looked at him gravely. "I know."

8 8 8


	40. Evolution

**Chapter 38: Evolution**

**Disclaimer: Don't hurt me :P. I'm just playing with Joss' world. It's not mine :P. If it was, d'you think I'd have let Season 7 Buffy and Season 5 Angel end like that:P**

**Rating: I think I'm boring everyone to death repeating the same thing each time. See the first fourteen chapters if you haven't, yet :)**

**Summary: This is the summary of the last couple of chapters and anything important I thought needed to be added. :D.**

**AU from the ending of Season 4. Riley and Buffy have 'made up', while Spike has finally realized his true feelings for Buffy. Daniel, Cassandra, and Dawn, have also uncovered and old poem that may or may not be a prophecy. And, as all prophecies are wont to be, it's cryptic and doesn't make sense :P. Joyce has also been admitted to hospital for a fainting spell that she's had. Riley has also been going to the vamps for a while to get bitten. Spike has discovered, and has led Buffy to him. As the pain of yet another betrayal overtook her, she allowed Spike to comfort her. The next day, Riley stormed into Spike's crypt and staked him with the plastic wood-grain. Buffy, looking for a listening ear, found him and bandaged him. Spike finally tells Buffy that he's in love with her.**

**A/N (Goddess! Thank you so much to everyone again! hugs! Four reviews for one chapter again! I won't go on and on about the reviews again unless you want me to :P. (btw… to Kim, nice fic. : ). And to KellyTheSelfToastablePopTart, I'm glad you like what I've done with this. :D. And to Dieu Anonyme… laughs and salutes "Sir yes sir! Writing now!" I'm happy you liked this chapter :P. And thanks to Charity for the praise I probably don't deserve :P. And for realizing I'm evil. : D ) **

**My thanks again for coming back and finding 4 review alerts in my inbox, guys. I really appreciate it. :D. So now, without further ado, onto the chapter! Hope you enjoy :) I know I was evil with that Cliffhanger, but I hope this makes up for it. :P )**

8 8 8

"Would it be self-centred if I thought 'the starred ones' could refer to us?" Cassandra nibbled on the end of her pencil.

Daniel raised his eyebrow. "Do we even _look_ remotely starry?"

"I don't know," Dawn giggled. "When you two look at each other."

"Dawn!" they cringed. "That's…"

"Not possible," Cassandra blushed.

"Plain wrong!" Daniel shuddered at the same time. He looked at her. "No offence, Cass. You're my best friend. It'd be too weird."

"You're actually contemplating it?" her eyes widened as the blush deepened on her cheeks. Dawn looked back and forth at the almost comical looks that flew across both of their faces. What if in the future…?

"What? No! I…"

Dawn smirked.

They both glared at her.

"Somehow, this is all your fault," Daniel accused.

Dawn laughed. "My fault? Just because you two have unresolved…"

"Don't even say it," Daniel warned. "Don't even…"

"Hey, this looks familiar."

The two froze, fingers still pointing at each other. "What?"

The book lay in front of them, one of Giles' old demonology ones with information that dated back to over 7,000 years. They squinted at the scrawling handwriting.

"Uh… Cass? Unless you've read so much your brain's decided you can read anything… this looks like something demony," Daniel tried to joke.

"No it isn't," she insisted. "It's in English, can't you see?"

Silence.

"Come on," she said impatiently. "If I can read it, you can. _Xyilan fortak imth estreal, seconden aliynea Kyros inth, Kronus asth finet colriae, doecidue ith rhyithe unt zyrlain…_"

Silence.

"Hang on a sec. That doesn't sound like English," she looked confused.

Dawn and Daniel exchanged glances. "Cass? I live with Buffy… but even that made no sense."

She frowned. "But I can _understand_ it."

Daniel massaged his eyes as the words seemed to dance across the page. He could almost swear he could see them moving when he opened them again. He swallowed and looked away.

"Can you translate it to English?"

Cassandra nibbled on the pencil again. "I can try. But I wasn't messing around when I said it looked familiar."

They waited as she grabbed a piece of paper and scribbled down strange etchings that neither of them could decipher. Or perhaps that was just her handwriting. Whatever it was, around half a minute later, she started haltingly reciting, certainty and uncertainty both clashing in her voice.

"_You have been chosen,_

_Before the death of Time,_

_To follow the path,_

_And teach with song and Rhyme…"_

"That one again?" Dawn exclaimed. "But that's the same one we already know. And we thought it was new or something. Why is it written down here?"

Cassandra shook her head. "There's more, and it's slightly different."

"Oh?"

"_Power of the ancient,_

_To call and bend at will,_

_Companion to the Singers,_

_That blood will break and spill_

_The First and Last have cycled,_

_Undo what's gone before,_

_If Heart and darkness fails,_

_Within this endless war_

_There are battles to be won,_

_Time bends those that cannot lose,_

_And the fighting must be done,_

_For the Heart to finally choose_

_Argue, lie, tell truths and hate,_

_Work against the other Fate,_

_Guide and save, protect and fall,_

_Reality and dreams both call._"

Daniel whacked his head on the table.

"Hey!" Dawn slapped him on the shoulder. "You need all the braincells you can get!"

"Oh god," he mumbled, resting his head on the wood and noting the swirling patterns within it. His eyes blurred again and he shook his head from side to side in an effort to clear the dizziness that had suddenly overcome him.

"Dan?" Dawn laid a hand on his shoulder.

"Are you okay?" Cass asked, worried.

His answer was muffled by the table.

"I'm getting really sick of these prophecies."

8 8 8

A moment passed as their eyes connected.

She finally broke it.

"I've gotta go to Riley," Buffy told him softly.

For a second, he'd looked so hopeful it was as if a sun had burst from his eyes. Vulnerable and open, But at those words, he shut down, withdrawing into himself. Before her eyes, the stone built up in seconds until William the Bloody, Slayer of Slayers once again sat before her.

"Of course," he spat gruffly, studying the wall forty-five degrees from her head intently. "Soldier boy must be worried that you're going to drop his pansy ass at the moment. Run along and correct that for him, won't you?"

Buffy stood up. "Spike…"

After all, he could have started the bloody apocalypse but because he's human, you'll all forgive him and have a soddin' group hug…"

"Spike…"

"And what are you going to do next!" he demanded, ignoring her, gathering momentum as he plunged fully into his rant. "Dance around together like Santa's reindeer and all's frikkin' paradise again?"

"Spike!"

"And of course you'll get the bloody picket house on the bloody Hellmouth I never should 'ave bloody come to with this bloody…"

"SPIKE!"

Her voice reverberated across the crypt walls and stopped him in mid-rant. "What!" he growled, irritated at the interruption.

She faced him coolly down. "I'm going to Riley to tell him just how much he doesn't belong in my life."

He fishmouthed.

"And how low of him it was to attack you."

"Say what?" he couldn't believe his ears.

"I know you can handle yourself, Spike. But what he did was cowardly. This isn't about you, this is about what's happening between _us_, and he shouldn't have dragged you into it."

"Oh love," his voice softened and saddened, and she wondered how he could change from angry to astounded to understanding and wise in the space of a minute.

Then he snorted and became sarcastic, yet still approachable Spike. "You don't need me to tell you why he did."

She hesitated, and drooped. Then, amidst her crumbling face, a wry smile flitted across the remnants of her mask.

"God, Spike. How can you do that?" she asked simply.

"Do what?"

She threw her hands up in the air and collapsed into an armchair. "I'm Buffy. The Vampire Slayer, right?"

"If you're still not sure about that one, pet, I doubt 'm the one you need to be talkin' to that about," he smirked.

"You know what I mean!" she sighed, frustrated. "It's just that everyone, including my friends, sometimes… they act as if I'm clueless and they need to tell me what to do, what I am when I'm like this. But you don't," she glanced at him. "Why don't you?"

He studied her. "Because you're Buffy. The Vampire Slayer, pet. Buffy the Vampire Slayer."

"That's supposed to be an answer?" she looked at him incredulously.

"Yeah," he leaned back into the bed and winced slightly. "You're not dumb, love, and you know it. You might be in denial a lot of the time, but you do know it. People don't need to give you the bloody answers, not all the time. 'Specially when it's about something like this. Personal stuff, you know? Relationships and all. Even though callin' what Whitebread and you had a relationship makes me wanna…"

"Not now, Spike," she murmured. "Please not now."

He shrugged. "I know. Just sayin' what I've always felt, you know? I may be your bloody mortal enemy, Buffy. But goin' back to the point, I treat you like the chit who could always mess up the best plans I had. The Slayer I couldn't kill when I'd killed all the others. The girl who makes me feel alive for the first time in over a century."

The last sentence was almost a reverent prayer as it left his lips, and she shifted uncomfortably. He noticed her reaction, and looked down, his eyes slightly ashamed and yet proudly defiant at the same time.

"'m sorry I keep blurtin' this out… no wait, 'm not bloody sorry. This is who I am, an' I soddin' know this, at least. My unbeatin' heart on my sleeve an' all that rot. An'…"

He stopped talking when he finally realized she wasn't there any more. A sudden spear of hurt crashed into his chest and he felt real blood trickle out almost as if in response to it. He winced.

"Bloody Slayer. Just like that to bugger off when…"

He saw the heated-up blood bag flying towards him a second before he instinctively caught it. In wonder, he stared at her as she popped her head down the trapdoor to stare at him seriously.

"I'll be back to see how you're doing, Spike. But I think I need to go sort all of this mess out, now."

"Sure," he said, his voice slightly dazed from his shock. A vamp couldn't take so many surprises in such a short time. He almost felt his dead neurons blow.

He heard footsteps, then, as she walked out of his crypt.

"Slayer, wait!"

They paused. "What?"

He paused. "Uh… good luck."

And he swore his vampire hearing picked up a soft 'thanks' as the crypt door closed.

8 8 8

As I closed the crypt door behind me, I started visibly shaking. Leaning against the cold granite for support, I wrapped my arms around myself and closed my eyes. Suddenly, I felt completely nerveless, and I slid down to the ground, still shaking with cold and fear and shock and pain. And surprisingly enough, with a small tinge of wonder as well. I'd known that Spike… I couldn't think it. Not yet.

No. I could. I hadn't come this far mentally just to take a few steps back.

I'd known that Spike had loved me since last night. When I'd looked into his eyes as he held me. I'm not sure if he noticed at first. He was looking down at mine, and it was written all over his face. A softness and a strength indescribable on those smooth, sharp planes. At that time, I just basked in the warmth of it, let it enfold me and be my buoy over the sea of pain that Riley had almost drowned me in.

Yes. I can wax lyrical. Give me a break. I've been able to say things over two syllables ever since I was introduced to the wonders/horrors of studying Shakespeare. Just because I'm a Slayer and I might get hit in the head doesn't mean I'm dumb. And I generally don't let them get anywhere near the head area with the punch-y action.

I guess I act like that because it's easy sometimes. It's easier to act clueless when I'm not. Pop psychology would probably say I'm doing the compensate-y thingy because as a Slayer, I need to be strong and make the decisions and be in power so I kinda enjoy it when I can be Buffy and…

Wait. But I'm not like that.

Stuff Pop psychology. They've never dealt with a Slayer before anyway.

Getting back to the point, however. I just hurt so much at the time. Another betrayal. I was beginning to think it was the Curse of Buffy or something. Or rather, just Buffy's curse in general. He… the love shining in his eyes, melting from his skin as he held me… I let it take some of it away. Let it bandage my wound somewhat, I guess.

And around an hour later, when it finally sunk in, it struck me with a horrible sense of finality. I had time to mumble a thanks before stumbling to my bedroom and letting loose another flood of tears. Funny. I remembered thinking Buffy'd been all cried out. I guess there were always more tears in the world of Buffy. More pain and blood.

I guess three months ago, before any of this had started, I would have gone into denial. Would have screamed and raged against him. Maybe even staked him. Then again, I doubt he'd loved me three months ago, or knew he'd loved me. Yeah, there was always that 'chemical attraction' thing. But not love. But now? Now there was definitely love. And I didn't want to slip into denial. Not if that meant I couldn't rely on him. I knew firsthand (well… duh) what happens when Buffy goes into denial.

I end up hurting most of the people around me. And myself as well.

It just wasn't worth it. Not if it meant I couldn't depend on him. Not if it meant that all the aid… and in a sense, the friendship, partnership we had meant nothing.

Oh God.

From mortal enemies to… slaying buddies in three months.

How the world changed.

Did I regret it?

I remember thinking so hard about it in bed, after the tears had dried on my face and I'd blown my nose and dived back under the covers to a safe world where Buffy could sleep. Mind you, I didn't always feel safe in my sleep. Remembering Angelus and Dracula didn't help. Last night, though… it was like the world stopped as I'd patiently opened my mind and sorted everything out in that unflappable calm that had just come over me.

For once, I was an unflappable Buffy.

Shouldn't the world be celebrating?

I guess I was just too exhausted to be emotional at that time.

Not only that, I knew that logically, Spike had done me a favour. A big favour. He'd been doing me favours ever since the spell, and I hadn't really given him anything in return. I don't think I was indebted to him as such. Spike was giving it freely of his own accord. Hell, as Tara had said the other day, he'd stopped asking for money. I couldn't look that in the face and try to say he was twisting it for his own means. Because he obviously wasn't. He was acting, he was being like a potentially vital ally that I could come to rely on in time.

And I did.

Rely on him, I mean.

It was funny how I hadn't even noticed how quickly I ran to him whenever things went wrong.

Perhaps it was also the depend-y thingy. Riley'd left me, I knew. Not then, but months ago. He'd left me when he realized, admitted to himself I didn't love him. Which was about two months into the relationship.

Another tear had rolled down cried-out Buffy's cheek. I'd lost him just barely after I'd gotten him. But it wasn't so much that that had hurt me. It was the betrayal, again.

It's incredible how much I can realize, admit to myself, when I choose not to be in denial anymore.

Yes, that's right.

Choose.

I guess, last night, I _chose_ not to fall into denial again. It'd driven Angel away even further, it'd prolonged out pain-wracked, broken relationship, it'd driven my friends and family away at times that, inside, I'd really, really needed them. It'd driven away Kendra and Faith.

In the end, it had almost driven away me.

Last night, I _chose_ not to deny Spike. I'd _chosen_ not to hurt him and myself even further. Because I couldn't. I couldn't drive away the vampire, the demon who'd tried to kill me so many times, and then had turned around and saved me and my family and friends. I couldn't drive away the person who delighted in violence, who took pleasure in causing pain but opened his heart when he saw someone was hurting. I couldn't deny the man who drank hot chocolate with my mum, hung out with my sister and her friends, and who was in love with me.

And actually _choosing_ how I'd react gave me a sense of power I'd never had before. I was Strong!Buffy. I hadn't let my prejudices and denial choose my path for me instead of my heart.

Yay.

Big step for Buffy Summers.

I remember, three years, ago, picking up one of Mum's books from her bookcases and flipping through it. I guess I hadn't understood what it said properly until now. Or the gist of it, at any rate.

But now, I think I do.

Choice is what truly gives us strength. To decide our own future, instead of letting prejudices and first impressions rule it for us. And hey, me with being the Slayer, I need as much deciding-of-the-future as possible. Because there's too much sway other people, other demons, other things have over it.

I've never forgotten I could die tomorrow.

So I can't waste my time and lose a… friendship. Partnership.

Is that what Spike is? A friend? A partner?

Whatever it was, I could no longer stay safe in denial and treat him like a soulless, evil demon.

Because he's a monster. And a man.

I stopped thinking, then.

Because my head hurt, and my body hurt, pressed up against the granite and grass. I could ponder everything again later. Sort it out again and truly understand everything after I'd taken control of something else in my life that needed to go.

So I stood up and went to find Riley.

8 8 8


	41. Friends

**Chapter 39: Friends**

**Disclaimer: Don't hurt me :P. I'm just playing with Joss' world. It's not mine :P. If it was, d'you think I'd have let Season 7 Buffy and Season 5 Angel end like that:P**

**Rating: I think I'm boring everyone to death repeating the same thing each time. See the first fourteen chapters if you haven't, yet :)**

**Summary: This is the summary of the last couple of chapters and anything important I thought needed to be added. :D.**

**AU from the ending of Season 4. Spike has told Buffy that he's in love with her, and surprisingly enough, she's taken it fairly well. Big step for Buffy. :D. After some fairly intense soul-searching, she has gone off to search for Riley to finally talk things through. Cassandra, Dawn and Daniel are still trying to uncover the meaning of what they have discovered. **

**A/N (Thank you to Kim and KellyTheSelfToastablePopTart for your reviews. :P. Unfortunately, I know that this update is way behind schedule. I plead guilty, but I have my reasons :P. This is the second last chapter of this fic, and I've been working on the last chapter just to make sure everything goes smoothly. Thank you all of you for waiting so patiently and for hanging in with me in a fic that has truly taken me to the edge of insanity and back, and also has given me a new insight into writing. So now, without further ado, onto the chapter! Hope you enjoy :) I know I was evil with that Cliffhanger, but I hope this makes up for it. :P )**

8 8 8

"Good God," Giles looked dumbfounded.

"Yes, Giles," Willow giggled. "Isn't it incredible?"

Giles stared at the… thing in front of him, and wondered at the level of his sanity.

"It's a bookcase, Willow," he murmured, resisting the urge to take out his glasses and begin wiping them down furiously.

"I don't think it's just any old bookcase, G-man," Xander grinned smugly. "Look at it."

He did. His eyes widened appreciatively as he ran a hand along the grained wood, marvelling at the fine craftsmanship. The dark mahogany wood certainly matched the rest of his apartment, he decided. Mind you, he still couldn't get over the very strange design…

"May I inquire as to what is the occasion?" Giles asked weakly.

Willow beamed and Tara chuckled softly. "Of course you can," her smile grew wider if it was at all possible. "We just wanted to… you know… brighten up your Watcherly life and say thank-you for all that you've done for us so far."

"And for keeping most of us alive," Anya added brightly, coming in from the door to snuggle against Xander, who unconsciously let an arm slide around her waist to rest it upon her hip.

Giles tilted his glasses and raised his eyebrows.

Willow deflated somewhat and wilted slightly under his penetrating glance as she looked from side to side. "Fine," she mumbled. "It's a belated Christmas present."

Tara lightly whacked her on the arm. "You say that like it's a bad thing."

Giles laughed. "We haven't even really properly celebrated Christmas yet anyway…"

The laughter died away as they all remembered why.

Willow swallowed. "When Joyce gets better," she said softly. "Then we'll have Christmas."

"I thought you Jews didn't believe in Christmas," Anya said.

Willow nodded. "We don't… I mean… I certainly don't. But people look at me weirdly when I say Happy Hannukah. Besides… I'm kinda Wiccan now as well, so it's the Sun God's festival. Hey! Happy Sun God's festival!"

"Uh… Wills, won't people look at you even weirder when you say that?"

Her slightly crestfallen face was enough for incentive for them to begin laughing again.

"It's a pity Buffy isn't here," Xander commented as his laughter died down.

"Yes, I was rather surprised at that," Giles nodded. "I assumed she'd gotten the memo we sent her this morning."

"Perhaps she's at the Magic Box?" Anya asked.

"Or with Riley?" Tara suggested.

Xander shrugged. "I need to go pick up something from the Magic Box before we get down and dirty with the bookcase. Anyone want to come?"

"I'll come!" Anya offered eagerly. He winced slightly as her grin increased. "See? I did that double entendre thing you were talking about yesterday!"

Stifled laughter followed them out of the door.

8 8 8

Going to find Riley had been a good idea. Until she somehow ended up at the Magic Box, punching the hell out of the poor, abused bag. She barely registered the noise of the key and bell as someone else stepped inside. Or the creak of the door as it was opened. Or the two quiet and not-so-quiet gasps and then the shutting quickly of said door.

And then, twenty minutes later, the tinkling again of the aforementioned bell.

"We need to talk, Buffy."

She didn't stop punching. She didn't even want to look at him at the moment. Look at him, and know what he'd been doing, who he'd been with the last time that she'd seen him.

And feel the betrayal seep into her bones again.

"Talk, then," she let loose a double spin kick on the bag. "And make it quick."

"No," he shook his head at that. "Proper talking, Buffy. As in, eye-to-eye, looking at each other talking."

"Fine!" she unloaded one, last, vicious hit to the punching bag, and the chain squealed in protest. Turning around, she glared at the man who stood before her. "Okay, eye-to-eye talking now. You happy?"

He shook his head again. "Far from it."

He looked at her. At the Slayer, at Buffy. Looked at her golden hair, her tanned skin, her wiry, lithe body. Felt the strength in those taut muscles. And looked at the tumult of barely-controlled emotions in her eyes as they flared again at his words.

"Of course not. You couldn't be happy with me, so you went out and got bitten… and… whatever else you did by vampires. Killers. Why would me even listening to you after that make you happy?"

"You don't get it, Buffy. I need to tell you _why,_" he looked pleadingly into her face. "I can't apologize for what I've done, I know. It wouldn't do anything. I just need to make you understand."

"Understand what?" she glared at him in disbelief. "Understand why you not only cheated on me once, but God knows how many times after that?"

"It's not…"

"Wait," she narrowed her eyes at him. "This is about Angel and Dracula isn't it?"

"Yes," he agreed, and he felt the temperature in the room lower a few degrees.

"Get… out…" she hissed.

"No, Buffy," he walked towards her and tried to grasp her shoulder, but she wrenched herself out of his grip. "You don't understand yet."

"I'm serious, Riley. Unless you want to fight."

He clenched his jaw. "So let's fight. We need to have this out, Buffy. Right now."

"And say what, Riley?" she laughed in bitter disbelief. "How completely immature it was? 'Let's have another macho-pissing contest while the other contestants aren't even around and almost get myself killed?'"

"I just wanted to understand what was between you…"

"You don't understand anything, Riley! Even with those… you don't understand anything!"

"I understand enough!" he yelled, and the anguished tone in his voice made her pause for just a second in her building rage. He clawed his hands through his hair in frustration, looked down to the ground and then to the ceiling, cast his eyes around as if somewhere, there was still a lifeline that could save him and his dreams. "I understand that they somehow have power over you! I understand there's something between you and vampires that I can never touch! Angel, Dracula… God, even Spike! There's a part of you I really can't touch, and God… you won't even let me try. You keep me at such a distance… you didn't even call me when your mother went into hospital!"

She stared at him incredulously. "Oh, um… sorry I couldn't take care of you while I thought my mother was _dying_!"

"It's not about that! It's about me taking care of you!"

She stared at him again. "So sleeping with Faith was taking care of me? So getting bitten by some vampire whores was taking care of me? So staking _Spike_, one of my most important allies was taking care of me!"

He felt the words pass through him in a dream. "How do you know about Spike?"

The look she gave him shrivelled his heart.

"I went to talk to him about this," she swept her hand across the air between them. "Because he was the one who showed me what had happened."

He shook his head for the third time in five minutes. "I don't believe this. You went to a _demon_? You went to _Spike_? See, this is what I'm talking about!"

"So it's not that you went to vampire whores to get something you couldn't get from me," she spat furiously. "It's because you're jealous of my slaying partner?"

"So he's your slaying partner now?"

"He's Spike! He's helped me in situations no-one else could do anything, he's a valuable fighter, and you not only staked him with plastic wood-grain to humiliate and hurt him, you did it because he helps me when I patrol!"

"He's not the issue, here," Riley tried.

"But you've made him the issue!" Buffy glared at him angrily. "You dragged him into it because you couldn't stand the fact he's stronger than you and that's why I need him to help me fight!"

"And that's it!" her words hit him like physical blows as he felt his own leaving his mouth. "That's the issue! You don't need me. _They_ did."

Her fists clenched. "They didn't need you. They needed your money."

"No," he disagreed. "On some basic level, they needed me. My blood, my body…" he sighed. "It was beyond passion. They wanted to devour me."

"Why are you telling me this?" she whispered.

"Because it wasn't real," he reached out a hand to touch her face but she flinched back, and he let it drop helplessly to his side again. "It was just physical. But I… craved it. I kept going back. They made me feel like… they had such hunger for me."

It was her turn to shake her head. "And I don't make you feel that way."

It was a statement, not a question, and he turned away from it.

A tear fell.

"You weren't a passion to them! You were a snack! A willing, idiotic snack!"

"Yes, but I knew how they felt. Because I feel it every time we're together. It's like the whole world falls away. And all there is, is you. But you can't deny this, Buffy. You can't deny that you don't feel the same way. And that's what's missing."

She opened her mouth. Closed it. Opened it again. He waited for the burst of vitriol to rip what he himself hadn't tattered to shreds yet.

"I know."

He gaped at her. She sighed.

"I know, and I'm sorry."

He swallowed. "But… you don't have anything to be sorry for."

She levelled him with a solemn, serious glance. "We both know I do. I've been using you, Riley. It hurts, I know. It just… hurt so much. And then there you were, so dependable and strong and…"

"Human?" he asked softly.

She hung her head in shame.

"I'm not a very good hero, Riley," she admitted. "I save the world so many times, over and over, but I can't seem to do anything right."

Her eyes, glittering with tears, stared at him through the growing dusk that hazily filtered through the window. It cast her face in a mixture of shadow and dying light, cast her body as scarred with flashes of refracted colour.

"Buffy," he halted. "Don't say that."

"But it's true," she smiled tiredly at him. "I think when Angelus came… when Angel left me, the part of me that could love just… died."

He was about to ask her what had truly happened in all its entirety, but then he saw the silent pain shining so clearly in her emerald eyes and realized. It wasn't about him understanding here. It was about her.

He felt something constrict in his chest. Standing before him was the woman he loved with all his heart, admitting, finally admitting, that everything to her had been just words, just actions.

And she was in pain.

He gently let his hand rest on her shoulder, and this time she didn't flinch away as she felt implicitly the hesitant comfort he was offering her. She raised her eyes to meet his.

"That's not true, Buffy."

She started to shake her head, but he interrupted her.

"You _can_ still love," he assured her. "That's… that's one of the things I love so much about you. The way you take care of Dawn and your Mum, watching you laugh with Willow and Xander… teasing Giles… making Anya and Tara feel comfortable. There's so much love in you, Buffy. So much love just waiting to be unburied again. God," his voice became pained. "You can even see good in a demon. You're incredible, Buffy. You're amazing. Don't ever believe you have no love left in you. Don't ever believe it."

He was surprised when she hugged him. It wasn't a lover's embrace, and that fact still hurt him. But at least he no longer felt the emptiness, the nothingness of it. He could feel that she meant this. That it wasn't nothing to her.

It was something else.

"Thank-you, Riley," she said quietly. He felt her step back, and his arms twitched convulsively. Something in him knew that this could be the last time… ever… the first and the last time he would ever be connected to her like this. But he stayed his hand. Because both of them knew.

"I'm sorry," she apologized again. "I know what… I know what I should have done now."

Her clear green eyes shone in the moonlight, now. Dusk had gone. The silver beams coated everything in wondrous mixtures of blacks, greys, and whites.

She swallowed.

Then held out her hand.

"Friends?"

He took it.

"Friends."

The silence surrounded them.

"What are you going to do now, Riley?" she whispered.

He sighed. "I… the military wants me back. Deep undercover, no contact with civilians. The transport's leaving midnight."

"You… waited this long to tell me?"

"I didn't know myself until today. They decided to stop by."

She digested this, slowly.

"Are you going to go?"

He returned her look. "Should I?"

She shook her head. It seemed that action had been repeated so many times that night. This time, however, there was just a calm acceptance on her face.

"It's not my decision to make, Riley. But I think we both know what should happen."

He nodded, and sighed. "I'm… thank you."

"For what?" she laughed humourlessly. "Hurting you?"

"No," he shook his head. "For teaching me. Teaching me about myself, my strengths. What I want. What I'm going to have. For giving me… memories, at least, for when I need them. I love you, Buffy. Nothing's going to ever change that. And I won't deny that this will hurt like nothing I've experienced before. But I know I'll find something."

"You'll find someone," Buffy corrected, tears starting to spill over at his words. "You'll find someone who deserves you."

"It's not about deserving. It's about _matching,_" he shrugged. He smiled painfully back at her. "And I know you'll find someone too."

He checked his watch, and then exhaled heavily. "I've got to go, Buffy."

"I know," she said. She quickly hugged him, but she'd stepped back before he could sink into it. "Take care of yourself, Riley. I know this is what you'll do best. Saving people."

"You take care of yourself too, Buffy."

A smile twitched his lips.

"And tell Spike if he hurts you, I'll kill him."

She let a watery grin cross her face. "Somehow, I don't think he will. But I'll pass on the message."

"Good."

"Try not to get yourself killed, Riley."

"Likewise."

He let his eyes capture her for one last, long second as he built the image in his mind to keep forever. A golden angel, tear tracks slipping down her cheeks, illuminated by the moonlight. But there was peace written on her face, and friendship in her slender hands.

"Goodbye."

She didn't have to say anything back. It was in the air. There was no more need for words. He walked away, out of the Magic Box, back to his apartment, and then to a waiting helicopter that would transport him to the next section of his life.

8 8 8

"Xander?"

"Buffy."

She hugged him, tightly.

"Are you okay?"

"Yes, I think I will be."

He looked from her to the open door, and then back to her again.

"It's over, isn't it?"

She nodded. "Yes, it is."

He sighed. "Are you sure?"

The determination in her eyes said it all. "Yes. We both agreed… we need to find someone who matches us. Someone who complements us. And… we… cleared up a few things."

He let her hug him even tighter, only letting out a slight yelp when he felt one of his ribs shift slightly. "Buffy!"

"Oh, sorry," she looked embarrassed as she released him.

"Hey, Buff… I was originally here, as in, around an hour or so ago, to see if you wanted to come to Giles'. We gave him the bookcase. But… now? I think you should go home and rest. Or… patrol. Or… just do whatever you need to do. Everything's done, anyway. I could patrol for you, if you want?"

"Thanks, Xand. I think I can deal, though."

He smiled softly down at her. "I'm sure you can. Now, I need to go… I need to tell Anya something."

8 8 8

"I've gotta say something..."

The wind rushed. People slept and murmured. The moonlight illuminated one half of the world, while the sunlight kissed the other. Perfect in their duality.

"'Cause... I don't think I've made it clear."

A man and a demon walked amongst tombstones, and met with a girl and a Slayer under the stars.

"I'm in love with you."

Across the planet, people cried. People laughed. People shouted angry words, people healed each other.

People hated.

People loved.

"Powerfully, painfully in love. The things you do ... the way you think ... the way you move ... I get excited every time I'm about to see you."

And a man and a demon, a girl and a Slayer didn't need words.

"You make me feel like I've never felt before in my life. Like a man."

People screamed. People kissed. People killed. People made love.

And a man and a demon, a girl and a Slayer sat on the grass and stared into the endless expanse of stars.

"I just thought you might wanna know."

8 8 8


	42. Radians Mode

**Chapter 40: Radians Mode**

**Disclaimer: Don't hurt me :P. I'm just playing with Joss' world. It's not mine :P. If it was, d'you think I'd have let Season 7 Buffy and Season 5 Angel end like that:P**

**Rating: I think I'm boring everyone to death repeating the same thing each time. See the first fourteen chapters if you haven't, yet :)**

**Summary: This is the summary of the last couple of chapters and anything important I thought needed to be added. :D.**

**AU from the ending of Season 4. Spike has told Buffy that he's in love with her, and surprisingly enough, she's taken it fairly well. Big step for Buffy. :D. After some fairly intense soul-searching, she has gone off to search for Riley to finally talk things through. They had their long relationship talk, and finally parted on good terms, with Riley heading off to be a true soldier boy once again. Joyce is out of hospital. Spike and Buffy are on good terms. Cassandra, Dawn and Daniel are still trying to uncover the meaning of what they have discovered… and they will be until the next instalment. :P **

**A/N (Thanks KellyTheSelfToastablePopTart and Charity for your reviews. :P. I'm glad you liked my take on the ending of Buffy and Riley's relationship and the last scene, and generally enjoyed it : ). I enjoyed writing it. **

**Thank you all of you for waiting so patiently and for hanging in with me in a fic that has truly taken me to the edge of insanity and back, and also has given me a new insight into writing. So now, without further ado, onto the last chapter! Hope you enjoy :) )**

8 8 8

_You have been chosen…_

Cassandra almost felt like a chapter was closing as she watched the events unfold in front of her. She didn't know why, but something felt like it was ending. Palpably.

Or perhaps, was it just the beginning?

_The beginning of the calm before the storm,_ something whispered in her, and she shivered.

_Before the death of Time…_

"Enough of the cryptic blather," Daniel said calmly to thin air. "We know you're there, goddammit."

_To follow the path…_

She and Dawn exchanged looks. _Gee, what happened to the no swearing policy of his?_

They'd uncovered the damned prophecies. Researched them until their eyes had felt like bleeding. It had thrown them into an unreality again that was only broken by the memory of the knife, and the awful, hideous feeling of palpable evil that had rolled off it.

_And teach with song and Rhyme…_

Two days had passed now. Joyce would be coming home in an hour. Spike would be popping over to check on her, most likely through the back door, and maybe after Xander, Anya and Giles had come. The Wiccans were already downstairs, talking quietly.

_Power of the ancient…_

No one knew where Buffy was. Not at the moment, anyway. She hadn't been at the house for a while. The night Riley had left, she hadn't come back the entire night. She'd only dropped in shortly, looking exhausted but for some strange reason, with a peculiar air of peace, to check with Dawn how she was going. Then she was either back to the hospital, or to only the Powers knew where.

Well… Cassandra had her suspicions it involved graveyards and a certain platinum blonde vampire.

_To call and bend at will…_

They heard the wind rustle through the leaves outside. 

_Companion to the Singers…_

"We know you're there," Daniel emphasized. "And we want some answers. Now." 

_That blood will break and spill…_

Two days had passed without answers. Buffy leaving, Buffy coming, Giles leaving, Giles coming, Willow and Tara offering their support in their own way while Xander and Anya had shown up with halting jokes, blunt appraisals, and a box of jelly donuts.

And Riley leaving permanently.

_The First and Last have cycled…_

Below them, they could hear Willow and Tara moving around in the kitchen.

_Undo what's gone before…_

Something darkened dangerously in Daniel's eyes.

_If Heart and darkness fails…_

"_Now!_"

_Within this endless war…_

Two days since life had ended and started again in the saga that was Sunnydale. Visiting Spike the day after and exclaiming at his wounds. Venting angrily against Riley. Calming down to begrudging acceptance as Spike had at times tonelessly and then scathingly revealed in short, sharp sentences exactly what he thought of 'Captain Cardboard'.

_There are battles to be won…_

"I WANT ANSWERS!"

_Time bends those that cannot lose…_

And, although Cassandra didn't know it, it'd be about 23 hours and 13 minutes before a certain group of people landed in Sunnydale.

_And the fighting must be done…_

His voice dropped to a defeated whisper.

_For the Heart to finally choose…_

"Please…"

_Argue, lie, tell truths and hate…_

The silence assaulted them again. Heavy and mocking as Daniel slumped to the floor, his legs too shaky to hold him up anymore. Too many days of stress and fear…

_Work against the other Fate…_

Too many days of uncertainty. Of the feeling that they were being manipulated. Perhaps it was the end of a cycle, truly. And the beginning of a new one. They now had everything laid out before them.

_Guide and save, protect and fall…_

Yet still, no answers. Three teenagers stood in a room. Awkward, with the dying sun stabbing at their eyes and a sudden feeling of an emptiness washing over them.

If only they knew that now, finally, the chess board was set. And the pieces were just about to move…

_Reality and dreams both call…_

8 8 8

It is getting closer to the end.

I can feel it today. Every time I approach the Hellmouth again, weave in between the shaky foundations of what used to be Sunnydale High School, a tendril comes out, almost as if to greet me eagerly. I greet it back, and then close my eyes and wait for the power to overwhelm my body again, making it stronger and more powerful again. Closer to what I used to be.

Kyrel and Thess have also been jittery as of late, unlike their usual selves. I shrug them away, mostly. What do they know of keeping contained? They're still fledges, really, for all of their power. I snort quietly and scuff my heels against the broken floor. There's a little path of crumbled stone that shows the route I walk now. Another sign I'm finally regaining what I lost. I'm not sure whether to be elated or worried that it's all coming so quickly.

Just like I'm not sure whether to be amused or wary of the three.

Yes, I felt them alright. It was like the shock energy when the two came, and then the third after them had short-circuited me. I lay spasming on the ground until it passed, mind wrapped in one painful image, one painful memory of the past and future after the next.

Those insignificant _grath'slarkeinaren_.

They thought that _three_ would… _could_ stop me?

8 8 8

_This _was Christmas.

Buffy's eyes roamed the table hungrily, feeling a teary joy well up inside her at the sight of Xander and Anya playfully fighting over feeding each other, Tara and Willow's secret… or not-so-secret glances. Dawn giggling with Cassandra and Daniel rolling his eyes. Giles sitting there and still looking so Watcherly, yet with a small grin plastered on that British face of his.

And Joyce. Mum. Sitting at the head of the table. Tired, exhausted, headache-y. Alive, beautiful, and her health recovering.

She let a true smile spread over her face. The decorations had been put up painstakingly by Dawn, Tara, Willow, Cass, and Daniel. Their effort had not gone unrewarded, despite the tree being lopsided and the decorations slightly haphazard in some places. But the tinsel shone and the lights were flashing. The candles were lit and laughter blessed the air.

But… was there something missing?

She saw a movement at the window, and let another smile play on her lips as she excused herself and moved to the back door. A smile accompanied by a slight misting of her eyes, but a smile nonetheless.

"Hey," she said softly to the night air as she stepped outside.

He appeared after a few seconds like a shadow, the back-door light shining gently on his face. Wreathed in the dark and bright as she walked towards him.

He coughed and brought something out from his duster. Two somethings. Three somethings. Four somethings.

"Here," he held the packages out awkwardly. "For mum, the little bit, the other Juniors and for you."

They were wrapped with newspaper, and the ribbons were wilted, but somehow the mere sight of them managed to leave a wave of gratitude in its wake.

"Thank-you," she replied, heartfelt. Then she took a quick glance at the door.

"Do you want to come in?"

He hesitated for a moment, and she swore she could see a fierce longing written over his face, before the mask slipped over again and he grinned lightly.

"I guess, considering it's a belated Christmas and all, I shouldn't really give the Whelp a bloody heart attack with a bow tied around it, right?"

She snorted. "You'll have to do better than that, Spike. Dawn and the others have missed you. And I know Mum wants to see you too."

He hesitated again. "I can drop by tomorrow or something… leave you lot with a peaceful Christmas without the Big Bad mucking it up. 'Sides. I'm a soulless evil demon who doesn't believe in soddin' Christmas."

She looked down at the carefully wrapped presents in her arms and then back to him, pointedly.

"I…"

"Come in, Spike."

She shifted the gifts, clasped his pale, cool hand, and led him through the door and into warmth.

8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8

Epilogue

I feel inordinately tired.

And inordinately confused.

I'm sitting in a circle of joy, and part of me yearns to belong.

Nibblet's giggling.

Platelet's laughing.

Junior's rolling his eyes.

The Whelp and Demon-girl are bickering over something.

Red and Glinda are snuggling and talking quietly.

The Watcher is wiping his glasses and I think he's trying to disguise the tears in his eyes.

Mum… she looks so vibrant in the candlelight. Like she hasn't just spent a week in hospital and undergone a CAT scan and like she isn't waiting with bated breath for the results.

The love shines from her face as she watches them all.

And the Slayer…

Buffy…

She's smiling.

She's smiling, and she's happy, and she's so strong and beautiful and incredible, and I can't help but chuckle quietly to myself. I'm sitting in the house of my ex-mortal enemy (what else can I soddin' call her? The Slayer never really let herself be shoved into categories) and her circle of friends who have trounced my ass time and time again. And I'm celebrating Christmas.

And I'm bloody confused.

I guess I'm finally asking the question I've been wanting to ask myself for a long time now.

What the hell has happened?

What great circle have we jumped around in the last few months since betraying Adam like a bunch of puppets manipulated by the soddin' Powers that soddin' Be? What life lessons have we learnt, what spiritual heights did we reach? What soap-opera relationships have we played through?

Hell, this is the second time I've helped the Slayer stop an apocalypse with the whole betraying-and-then-killing Adam thing.

I rest my head against the sofa and keep watching them. And then quietly admit to myself what's been staring me in my face for a long time.

I guess it hadn't started with the whole betraying-and-then-killing Adam thing.

It had started with the chip.

The cursed, bloody, chip.

No…

It had started before that.

Stupid soddin' story had started way before that, hadn't it?

Back when I first saw her, and my life changed. Back when I felt something stir up inside me again for a human instead of for Dru. A feeling. Feelings. Emotions. That slowly, as I spent more time fighting with her, dancing with her, starting to bloody fall in love with her even then, started trickling into me again. Not that I felt nothing with Drusilla. And yeah, I always kept this lust for the kill, this strength of soddin' feeling that's made me love's bitch so many times I don't even bloody well want to remember.

But I'd forgotten what it was like to have a non-vampiric relationship.

Blood is what rules us. Blood and/or pain. I'm not saying I don't get bloody off on having a good hunt or a dance. But I don't live for it like Angelus did and does. But yeah, my blood calls me. Fitting, considering all things.

Some nights, the image of the card I held so long ago with my birthright stamped all over it and joining me with the rest blazes itself into my mind and I can't get rid of it.

Some nights, I'm not even sure I want to.

Because I need to study it. The picture. The soddin' picture that encapsulates my entire life and un-life. The death-struck wasteland, the graveyard of my past. And the green, the beauty and growth on the other. The life.

I need to wonder, need to despair, and need to hope that I have a chance, because my soddin' heart and my soddin' demon are for once, in accord.

I don't want to be remembered for just being William the Bloody, Slayer of Slayers.

Because I can't be if I'm in love with Buffy.

And I'm going to leave it at that for the time being. Leave it at that, and go back to basking in this fragile warmth that is sweeter than sunlight.

Because this is just the beginning.

The beginning of something big, and the ending of the introduction to it.

…

…

Stupid clichés.

8 8 8

A/N

Well… It's taken me 345 pages on my computer to get me here. Over a year to finish this. And I've still got plenty more for the rest of the series…

I've learnt a lot about writing with this fic. I know my first lot of chapters weren't very good quality wise. Thank you so much all of you who have stuck with me here and kept on reading, and thankyou especially to all those who reviewed and kept my flagging hopes up. There really were times when writer's block hit me hard in this fic, and the main reason I came back was because of you guys. Thank you so much, all of you. Hopefully, I'll be back soon with the next instalment for this, or maybe even something new. :P.

The End… for now. : )


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